Class of April 2015 Part 5
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Johannesburg, Gauteng, South Africa
Posts: 1,371
Originally Posted by OMD 
Today is Martina's day! Total respect from all of us. We all have our massive ups and downs, it's almost as if real life is going on around us 
Anyway, I read the thread Martina mentioned last week when things weren't going so great for me, at ZaB's suggestion. So while ZaB may be useless at counting people he has some positive qualities. Right ZaB 😀
Great to see everyone checking in. We are all doing so fantastically well.
What a great class!
Best wishes
OMD
Anyway, I read the thread Martina mentioned last week when things weren't going so great for me, at ZaB's suggestion. So while ZaB may be useless at counting people he has some positive qualities. Right ZaB 😀
Great to see everyone checking in. We are all doing so fantastically well.
What a great class!
Best wishes
OMD
Have a good one all - bed time for me.
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 691
I just read the thread too, some great points were brought up.
63 people relapsing or dropping out since the start of this class is shocking to me, but it does bring into perspective of how tough this is. I relapsed 3 times previous. The thing is guys, we will never know in early recovery when the blasted AV will fire up hard. I was reading today about never stopping improving your life, don`t settle with destination disease (being too comfortable in your current situation). We may be comfortable today, but what about tomorrow? Keep on discovering ways improve our sober life so that we can never see ourselves back to where we were in our darkest days. For that reason alone, SR is a life line for sure.
Keep it up everyone. I decided not to go to the store, so no smokes for me! I may as well quit today. I will pop into walmart and grab some nicotine patches on my way home from soccer -aka football as you guys like to call it over there. My trash tv show is on tonight, so that will be fun! Not drinking today, and smoking, well thats another story....to be continued.
63 people relapsing or dropping out since the start of this class is shocking to me, but it does bring into perspective of how tough this is. I relapsed 3 times previous. The thing is guys, we will never know in early recovery when the blasted AV will fire up hard. I was reading today about never stopping improving your life, don`t settle with destination disease (being too comfortable in your current situation). We may be comfortable today, but what about tomorrow? Keep on discovering ways improve our sober life so that we can never see ourselves back to where we were in our darkest days. For that reason alone, SR is a life line for sure.
Keep it up everyone. I decided not to go to the store, so no smokes for me! I may as well quit today. I will pop into walmart and grab some nicotine patches on my way home from soccer -aka football as you guys like to call it over there. My trash tv show is on tonight, so that will be fun! Not drinking today, and smoking, well thats another story....to be continued.
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Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
Posts: 2,435
I almost caved and went to the store to buy alcohol tonight. Had a stressful day at work and it almost got the better of me. I didn't do it though. I watched a movie on Netflix and ate an ice cream sandwich instead. Feeling better but I always feel guilty when I really want a drink. I'm going to drink some celestial sleepytime tea soon and get some needed rest. Goodnight.
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 563
Angie, I'm glad you were able to stay strong.
Seems like the AV's that have been dormant are starting to pop back up again. I've only been able to stop drinking two times before this: once last summer for about six weeks and in December for three weeks. When I started drinking again in the summer I had something akin to an anxiety attack, and realized that I wasn't in love anymore with my boyfriend of three and a half years (he pushed me to get sober and was a great guy - more on that some other time). I remember feeling so horrible and I just didn't want to feel that way anymore. So I bought a bottle of wine and started drinking it. I didn't even enjoy it because I knew it wasn't the right thing to do. Was hungover the next morning and managed to stay sober for another two weeks before I gave up and went back to my drinking ways. The three weeks in December were kind of a fluke; I had just moved into a new house and was trying to change a lot of behaviors with that move (and having broken up with my bf). I wasn't really committed and started drinking again. Then it was very hard to quit. I knew I had to, but my AV just felt so strong. I drove drunk multiple times and missed work a few times. Just felt awful.
The difference this time around is I have you all and SR. It helps me to be in this as a group and remember on a daily basis why I quit drinking, and read posts from those who have made a happy, sober life for themselves - proof that it can happen! Well, that's enough storytelling for tonight
I hope you all have a good night/day/morning! Thank you for being here.
Seems like the AV's that have been dormant are starting to pop back up again. I've only been able to stop drinking two times before this: once last summer for about six weeks and in December for three weeks. When I started drinking again in the summer I had something akin to an anxiety attack, and realized that I wasn't in love anymore with my boyfriend of three and a half years (he pushed me to get sober and was a great guy - more on that some other time). I remember feeling so horrible and I just didn't want to feel that way anymore. So I bought a bottle of wine and started drinking it. I didn't even enjoy it because I knew it wasn't the right thing to do. Was hungover the next morning and managed to stay sober for another two weeks before I gave up and went back to my drinking ways. The three weeks in December were kind of a fluke; I had just moved into a new house and was trying to change a lot of behaviors with that move (and having broken up with my bf). I wasn't really committed and started drinking again. Then it was very hard to quit. I knew I had to, but my AV just felt so strong. I drove drunk multiple times and missed work a few times. Just felt awful.
The difference this time around is I have you all and SR. It helps me to be in this as a group and remember on a daily basis why I quit drinking, and read posts from those who have made a happy, sober life for themselves - proof that it can happen! Well, that's enough storytelling for tonight
I hope you all have a good night/day/morning! Thank you for being here.
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Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 212
Angie! Soo glad you didn't go through with it! (( hugs)) I know the feeling! Having a crappy day at work! But as we all know drinking won't do a single thing to change the outcome! May give us an escape for a few hours but umm that's about it and if you are an alcoholic like I am, the ball would keep on rolling and not stop there! It's back to my nightly binges until I pass out for months on end all because we had that 1 crappy day at work which will probably end up being fine the next day !
I'm sure that ice cream tastes so good ;-)
I'm sure that ice cream tastes so good ;-)
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Angie! So glad you managed to stay strong! 6-8 weeks, I've heard is a tough time for a lot of people. Have to review your commitment, etc... Forewarned is forearmed I guess.
My previous best sober streak was 6 week so I broke my record. Haven't been sober this long for 25 years! Just thanks for the day
My previous best sober streak was 6 week so I broke my record. Haven't been sober this long for 25 years! Just thanks for the day
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Kooskia, Idaho
Posts: 406
I'm glad you didn't drink Angie! I've had a couple close calls myself lately. My husband who is 7 months sober casually mentioned us getting some wine and just drinking one night and stopping. I almost talked myself into it. I went from almost caving, to scared, to feeking betrayed to angry. I ended up telling him that if he starts drinking again I am leaving. And if he can't pull his head out of his ass and get honest with himself we have no future. It was crappy to say the least. I am fighting for my life right now...with or without him. He didn't drink and neither did I. That is all that matters today.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Cee! That really is a crazy idea from your husband but it's not really his fault. His AV has talked him into the idea that if drinking is sanctioned by both of you it's ok. He just needs to realize where that idea came from!!!
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 560
Morning all!
Well done everyone for resisting or surfing the urge, however you did it. We all know what the right thing to do is but boy is it tough sometimes. I agree that for some reason something happens at 6-8 weeks. I was pretty much fine until last week (I hit 8 weeks on Monday) when I had a serious problem and to be honest it's still lingering. It makes absolutely no sense of course because my relationships with my wife and kids are infinitely better, I am fitter than before, definitely look better, have more energy, sleep better, relax better and am more productive at work and cope with stress at work more efficiently. And I have more money. All in just 8 weeks.
So for the last couple of days I have gone back to basics and just specifically taken a bit of time at the start of each day to say screw the AV, none for me today, which is the only day that counts. I also remind myself of how far I have come, the literally hundreds of times I have wanted to stop, and all the good things that are happening to me now. Seems to be getting me back on track, starting the day with my head in the right place. Then later in the day if I have a stupid thought I just mentally go back to the start of the day, reminding myself that I don't actually want to drink. All this is sort of a variation of the meditation I started doing and has been really helpful to me too but is very specific for this period in my life.
Enough waffling. None for me today.
Best wishes to all who read and post here. Let's keep going!
OMD
Well done everyone for resisting or surfing the urge, however you did it. We all know what the right thing to do is but boy is it tough sometimes. I agree that for some reason something happens at 6-8 weeks. I was pretty much fine until last week (I hit 8 weeks on Monday) when I had a serious problem and to be honest it's still lingering. It makes absolutely no sense of course because my relationships with my wife and kids are infinitely better, I am fitter than before, definitely look better, have more energy, sleep better, relax better and am more productive at work and cope with stress at work more efficiently. And I have more money. All in just 8 weeks.
So for the last couple of days I have gone back to basics and just specifically taken a bit of time at the start of each day to say screw the AV, none for me today, which is the only day that counts. I also remind myself of how far I have come, the literally hundreds of times I have wanted to stop, and all the good things that are happening to me now. Seems to be getting me back on track, starting the day with my head in the right place. Then later in the day if I have a stupid thought I just mentally go back to the start of the day, reminding myself that I don't actually want to drink. All this is sort of a variation of the meditation I started doing and has been really helpful to me too but is very specific for this period in my life.
Enough waffling. None for me today.
Best wishes to all who read and post here. Let's keep going!
OMD
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 560
Originally Posted by amp123
Angie! So glad you managed to stay strong! 6-8 weeks, I've heard is a tough time for a lot of people. Have to review your commitment, etc... Forewarned is forearmed I guess.
My previous best sober streak was 6 week so I broke my record. Haven't been sober this long for 25 years! Just thanks for the day
My previous best sober streak was 6 week so I broke my record. Haven't been sober this long for 25 years! Just thanks for the day
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,481
sometimes the 60-90 day period can be tricky OMD.
Some find it's just long enough for us to forget the bad stuff, or forget the impact of our drinking.
A lot of people find themselves confusing abstinence for control.
others swear that lunar cycles come into play or that anniversaries simply make them jumpy.
Whatever the reason, you can definitely power through this uncertainty & stay sober.
Keep reaching out here - as you know, it really helps
D
Some find it's just long enough for us to forget the bad stuff, or forget the impact of our drinking.
A lot of people find themselves confusing abstinence for control.
others swear that lunar cycles come into play or that anniversaries simply make them jumpy.
Whatever the reason, you can definitely power through this uncertainty & stay sober.
Keep reaching out here - as you know, it really helps
D
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 1,303
Originally Posted by amp123
Angie! So glad you managed to stay strong! 6-8 weeks, I've heard is a tough time for a lot of people. Have to review your commitment, etc... Forewarned is forearmed I guess.
My previous best sober streak was 6 week so I broke my record. Haven't been sober this long for 25 years! Just thanks for the day
My previous best sober streak was 6 week so I broke my record. Haven't been sober this long for 25 years! Just thanks for the day
Angie I'm so glad that you didn't get that wine either but know exactly how it feels to wobble like that but playing the tape forward really helps and in case just heading straight to bed whether I am tired or not
Good luck on quitting smoking Cauliflower you can do it
I am going to look at RR and the Okay I Quit Now What? because I do need to beef things up.
Our class is getting smaller but I do get encouragement from looking at the successes stories of long timers in sobriety so if you need a boost maybe look for those posts in the main forum?
Have a good day all
M
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Yeah, well I drank at the 2 month mark. Climbing back on the wagon, but I guess that I've forfeited my place here.
Frankly I wish that I found SR as supportive as many others obviously do. The time difference has been an issue for me. The time of the day I need some contact it is usually deserted.
I'll keep going though.....may look for a class where there are members in my time zone. Had a month in January, a couple more through April and May. This is best I've had in three years.
Anyway....getting these three months have been incredibly valuable. I've been able to generate some new habits and daily patterns that alcohol is not part of.
Part of the problem is not having a long term view or plan. It has just seemed too hard or unrealistic, I've just been day by day, week by week. Thinking this over carefully now.
So, I wish you remaining guys all the best for your continuing success.
Frankly I wish that I found SR as supportive as many others obviously do. The time difference has been an issue for me. The time of the day I need some contact it is usually deserted.
I'll keep going though.....may look for a class where there are members in my time zone. Had a month in January, a couple more through April and May. This is best I've had in three years.
Anyway....getting these three months have been incredibly valuable. I've been able to generate some new habits and daily patterns that alcohol is not part of.
Part of the problem is not having a long term view or plan. It has just seemed too hard or unrealistic, I've just been day by day, week by week. Thinking this over carefully now.
So, I wish you remaining guys all the best for your continuing success.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Hey Canguy!
It's nice to hear from you. I don't know about "forfeiting your place". I feel more like we embarked on a project together. And we should stick together through thick and thin.
Some of us have already tried sobriety before and others are starting their first attempt but despite that I think we all have a common aim. Relapses are common enough. Personally I'd really like it if you would still like to contribute here. There's no reason you can't be in another group too is there?
It's nice to hear from you. I don't know about "forfeiting your place". I feel more like we embarked on a project together. And we should stick together through thick and thin.
Some of us have already tried sobriety before and others are starting their first attempt but despite that I think we all have a common aim. Relapses are common enough. Personally I'd really like it if you would still like to contribute here. There's no reason you can't be in another group too is there?
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 1,303
Originally Posted by canguy
Yeah, well I drank at the 2 month mark. Climbing back on the wagon, but I guess that I've forfeited my place here.
Frankly I wish that I found SR as supportive as many others obviously do. The time difference has been an issue for me. The time of the day I need some contact it is usually deserted.
I'll keep going though.....may look for a class where there are members in my time zone. Had a month in January, a couple more through April and May. This is best I've had in three years.
Anyway....getting these three months have been incredibly valuable. I've been able to generate some new habits and daily patterns that alcohol is not part of.
Part of the problem is not having a long term view or plan. It has just seemed too hard or unrealistic, I've just been day by day, week by week. Thinking this over carefully now.
So, I wish you remaining guys all the best for your continuing success.
Frankly I wish that I found SR as supportive as many others obviously do. The time difference has been an issue for me. The time of the day I need some contact it is usually deserted.
I'll keep going though.....may look for a class where there are members in my time zone. Had a month in January, a couple more through April and May. This is best I've had in three years.
Anyway....getting these three months have been incredibly valuable. I've been able to generate some new habits and daily patterns that alcohol is not part of.
Part of the problem is not having a long term view or plan. It has just seemed too hard or unrealistic, I've just been day by day, week by week. Thinking this over carefully now.
So, I wish you remaining guys all the best for your continuing success.
We were both in the January class Canguy, both fell off in Feb and both climbed back on in the April class. I'd be happy for you to stay with us?
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
I'll say this....
If I have a short relapse, my plan would be to stay in April. If I went on a bender, then it would be a new group (and AA). Either way I would check in on April.
When I was looking into other support groups (live groups), some of them don't consider a relapse like that in the same way. They don't see it as going back to day 1. Basically, there comes a point when we want to get our lives back and we want it bad enough to TAKE ACTION. That's my day one. April 20th I took action. If I slip up, it will just become part of the process. Unless of course I give up and go on a bender.
To each his own is what comes to mind. The key point is to continue to improve. And to that point.....
Cauliflower is 100% right in that we need to continuously improve our lives. We are soooo early in the stages of recovery. For many, there's years to undo and it will take years to rebuild.
If find myself getting lazy in my quit. I'm busy as a bee in general, but my sobriety is no longer the #1 thought or even concern for me all the time. I don't expect my sobriety to be on my mind 100% of the time, but in my mind it's too early to get lazy. I know myself too well.
None for me today!
If I have a short relapse, my plan would be to stay in April. If I went on a bender, then it would be a new group (and AA). Either way I would check in on April.
When I was looking into other support groups (live groups), some of them don't consider a relapse like that in the same way. They don't see it as going back to day 1. Basically, there comes a point when we want to get our lives back and we want it bad enough to TAKE ACTION. That's my day one. April 20th I took action. If I slip up, it will just become part of the process. Unless of course I give up and go on a bender.
To each his own is what comes to mind. The key point is to continue to improve. And to that point.....
Cauliflower is 100% right in that we need to continuously improve our lives. We are soooo early in the stages of recovery. For many, there's years to undo and it will take years to rebuild.
If find myself getting lazy in my quit. I'm busy as a bee in general, but my sobriety is no longer the #1 thought or even concern for me all the time. I don't expect my sobriety to be on my mind 100% of the time, but in my mind it's too early to get lazy. I know myself too well.
None for me today!
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 691
Well done everyone.
Playing the tape forward really helps me to not take that first drink. I know a glass of wine will end badly, and it scares the hell out of me to know that I will right back to the nightly binges, horrible hangovers, feelings of worthlessness, and total useless unproductive days. Its the Av loud and clear telling you that a bad day at work deserves a drink. Its also the Av telling you that you deserve a drink because you had a good day, or that you can have some wine with the alcoholic husband for or old times sake. It never shuts up until you shut it up. A walk/run really helps you feel better, it stirs up the natural feel good hormones, unlike drinking, which simulates the endorphin rush for a microsecond before it becomes a depressant because we simply cannot stop.
I am wearing a nicotine patch today! I am also starting a new exercise routine since I think I finally got over my cold. So this should be a kicka$$ month for me! I am not drinking today!!
Playing the tape forward really helps me to not take that first drink. I know a glass of wine will end badly, and it scares the hell out of me to know that I will right back to the nightly binges, horrible hangovers, feelings of worthlessness, and total useless unproductive days. Its the Av loud and clear telling you that a bad day at work deserves a drink. Its also the Av telling you that you deserve a drink because you had a good day, or that you can have some wine with the alcoholic husband for or old times sake. It never shuts up until you shut it up. A walk/run really helps you feel better, it stirs up the natural feel good hormones, unlike drinking, which simulates the endorphin rush for a microsecond before it becomes a depressant because we simply cannot stop.
I am wearing a nicotine patch today! I am also starting a new exercise routine since I think I finally got over my cold. So this should be a kicka$$ month for me! I am not drinking today!!
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 1,277
a lot of really good posts to read this morning.
I'm glad you made it through Cee and Angie.
Can guy, you didn't forfeit. I agree that it's a process.
Amp nice job
Incontrol I know you have obligations but stay close to SR.
Well just wanted to check in. Spending time with a friend today. I've definitely had my moments where I had those out loud conversations with my AV. Lol makes me feel like I'm a little crazy but it also makes me realize that there's a real issue here. Have a good Wednesday everybody
I'm glad you made it through Cee and Angie.
Can guy, you didn't forfeit. I agree that it's a process.
Amp nice job
Incontrol I know you have obligations but stay close to SR.
Well just wanted to check in. Spending time with a friend today. I've definitely had my moments where I had those out loud conversations with my AV. Lol makes me feel like I'm a little crazy but it also makes me realize that there's a real issue here. Have a good Wednesday everybody
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