Midwest1981

I love coffee!! I can give up alcohol but I can't give up coffee. I told my dr. that I drink 4 cups of coffee a day. She said there was a study that showed drinking 4 cups of coffee a day helps prevent depression and she asked me if that's why I drink it. I was like no I just like it. .

erin8

oh I have an idea!! So I can't chat on the rooms here because I don't have java.. and I'm on my husbands laptop and he doesn't let me download things because I tend to get spyware and viruses ect..
So maybe we could all set up a time to go to another chat room or something?
I'm going to check it out and see if there is a place I can use.

erin8

lets see if this works..

http://www.chatzy.com/83041731843607

looks like it does. No signup or anything. Just have to make up a screen name. Could maybe use this in the future.
I've set up a password to enter. If you're interested pm me.
This is so lurkers cannot join in unless they ask directly.

brynn

Good morning y'all!

Everyone's up and at em this morning! I feel kinda guilty cause I'm still in bed! Ha!

Have a safe trip Midwest! Will you get to do any skiing while you're there?

Tonks...tell us about the new job! I'm so excited for you!

Hey Erin!! Isn't it neat how once you start writing you start remembering all sorts of stuff?!?! I love it! How old is your son?

Della...just want you to know you're in my thoughts and prayers. And yeah...gray days are made for hibernating for sure!

Hey Mariah! Hope everything's okay! Check in when you can!

Copper, how are you today? Hope your side is better! Know we are here for you and love you!

((Js))....lots of hugs coming your way. And dees right...no ones sick of you! You're part of this family and we love you! We are just very concerned for you and want to see you happy and free! I hope you'll check in and let us know you're alright. ❤️

My Royal Triplet Sisters....I think we rock! woohoo!
B...how are you feeling today?

For those who haven't posted in a while, we miss you!

Hope everyone has a great day!
xoxo

erin8

He'll be 4 in a little more than month!

MariahGayle

Hi Erin......It is all I can do to keep up on posts here & also in another class, so will not being doing the chat thingy. Hope you have a great day with your little guy....age 3/4 is my favorite age.

Denise....Fabulous Going on 55 Days!!

Congrats Sisters on 50 days!!! That is really awesome!

Wishing you all a great Saturday.......supposed to be nice here today so I am going to get outside & work in the yard, repair a whole in a bathtub (if anyone has any advice on this, pls let me know), get to the gym & hopefully some times with little Grandsons today.

Thinking of you Js & Copper & hope to see you post here today.

Hope you got some rest Tonks

Tonks

Hey guys! Been meaning to share this TED talk for awhile, just never got to it. I find it really insightful! If you don't watch it now, save it for a rainy day! I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Brené Brown: The power of vulnerability | Talk Video | TED.com

Brynncess Leia, it's a nursing job providing home care to clients with tubes coming out of them in all kinds of places as well as the customary wound care! Comfortable with all of it but its been a while since I messed with a trach patient, looking forward to learning everything again

Copper442

Gah! I just went through like 4 pages of posts and I only skipped out on half a day yesterday! I like how frequently everyone talks here. That being said, I'm a bit foggy so forgive this rascal for not remembering much of anything.

Tonka Truck, coffee = life blood. You would do well to remember that, ace

Midwest, I drink 4 cups a day too!!

BB, how are you feeling? I hope you're getting plenty of rest!

Bodhi, As you know I'm coming back from a fall so pick yourself up and do this with me. We all love you and need your bubbly, vivacious, nurturing, splendid self to be a part of this family. Love never deals in lies or condones behavior that is bad for you. So, we are lucky to have so many straight shooters in our litter who love us so much to tell us the truth and help us when we are down!!! Please check in. Tell us what was going on with you if you want and help us to help you. I love you, J.

Erin, your kid sounds awesome. I have a friend with a 4 year old nephew. He is soo much fun! They are so funny at that age.

Okay, I know I didn't get to nearly all of you and I apologize. So, the pain in my side is coming and going. I didn't go to the doctor yesterday but I had my mom assess it. She is an RN of 20 plus years and she didn't think it was urgent. Still needs to be checked out in her opinion so I'll be doing that this week.

Phew, for the sake of accountability and respect for my litter, I'm coming clean. Today I feel less like an out of control psychotic addict and more clear headed so I can recognize what was really happening yesterday. Yesterday I proclaimed that I did not get drunk....however, I drank in combination with some drug use. The thought of starting over after 6 weeks only fueled the cravings I was already having and I figured if I already blew it I might as well continue. Somewhere in all the madness though, I knew I could not spend the next three days engaging my addiction so I rationalized. "I didn't drink as much as I normally do so it's okay" "I'll just forget I did this and go on" and other such nonsense.

Today, while feeling like crap from using, I feel more sane in the membrane and I know I cannot press on after such an event and act like nothing happened. Being sober for 44 days prior to this has helped me see how scary my addiction is. I see it for how bad it is and I'm scared at how quickly I spiraled right back into it in one day. I was depraved and a complete wack-a-doodle yesterday and the night before. I apologize for being misleading to you all and to myself. In the end I'm hurting myself the most. I'm scared of that person who thinks and acts so dangerously.

Thanks to a super pup in this litter I'll be checking out some literature to have on hand to prevent this happening in the future and I have assembled a craving/trigger survival kit. I have my journal which helps by rereading my own thoughts, hard candy to curb my body's craving for sugar, emergency money to use for a movie, or at a coffee shop (I think sweet Della suggested that and I really liked it), and other assorted books that help me including my music theory text book because I am a super nerd.

Sorry for the atrociously long post! Please don't be to angry for me for acting under stupid addictive delusions! Day 2 today regrettably.

Dax, I'm late to the party but put me down for Jan. 23- ah, that's hard to swallow.

Keep charging the way, mates. Well wishes to all.

GnikNus

Day 52. I've downloaded other sober apps, just to have a variety of recovery resources available. Cravings during the week are nonexistent, though last night (Friday) I felt the tug for a drink after a long day. It passed, I went to sleep and woke up for day 52.
Nothing much to report, other than I am benefitting from not drinking in ways I wouldn't have imagined. What's strange is the fact that interactions with people have improved. I'm referring to during the day, when alcohol was usually not in the picture (except weekends). Interactions are clearer and easier ( that could be said about every other aspect of life as well).

Before early December, this point in my day would be spent counting the hours until I could take a nap to recover from a Friday binge. What a waste that was- all those Saturdays. Now I have a full day ahead of me- and I'll be able to enjoy it and remember every aspect if it. I'll be more productive and get things done.

Planning for a weekend around the house with my kids, doing some cooking and maybe stepping out for some fishing at some point.

Della1968

Great to hear from you Copper!! Make sure you get that side checked! I have finally entered cleaning mode! Erin I will check out the chat thing! Also have to look at Tonks link...but I guess I need to finish the bathroom grrr

Tonks

Copper ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, coffee is just gross. Did you hear we have royalty among us? The triplets ====>

Della, cleaning is gross too. But not cleaning is gross-er. Although I find doing dishes oddly relaxing, go figure.


Sunking! Good to see you, I envy you going fishing.

Time to go lift weights and make an excuse to eat something tasty later

castdown

Hi,
Caught up to page 11. Just checking in to say hi. Glad there's so many posts to catch up on. Wish I could be more active but I can't.
Cheerio for now.

Stubbs16

Hello, just a quick hi, all is good. Super duper busy today, will check and comment on more later.
Happy sober day all.

Erin, thanks for the info on that chat. I will be checkin it out as well. Gre8t idea!

erin8

Ugh socially awkward erin wants to go back to bed and sleep all day.
I'm so tired of all these highs and lows cycling. I want off this ride! !
Breathe. Blare music. Turn off brain.
catch y'all later.

brynn

Thanks for checking in copper!
We love you sweetie and are so glad you're here with us today!
And angry?? Not a chance! We're in this together, remember? Sounds like a wonderful plan today...reading and getting your mind in the right place again!

Umm..... I'm pretty sure tonks just referred to The Royal Triplets as the three stooges?!? Not sure how I feel about that...although it might be a more accurate description! Ha!

Tonks...the job sound great, and you'll pick everything back up pronto! You seem like a perfect fit for this kind of work...you'll bring a smile to your patients faces I know!

Hi cast and max!

Mariah...your to-do list astounds me!! Your a super-woman! Sorry, never repaired a bathtub before....my only experience with tubs is taking bubble baths!

Gnik.....I love what you said about relationships improving just in general! When I was drinking I didnt have time for interaction with anyone....I had to hurry and get stuff done so I could start drinking!!! It's such a relief not to have that ridiculous pressure anymore!!

Erin....you are so blessed to have a little one! I'm so happy for you! And I'll try and figure out that chat thing too...I'm totally un-technical! Blah!!

Jsbodhi

Hi!

I'm here, day 1.
I only sound flippant because I'm pretty carefree as a person, not because I don't think I'm an alcoholic
I can make light of anything
And I was drinking and having fun when I posted.
I'm not sure what happened, zombie drive I guess, I didn't post before because my cell was dead all day, so I didn't have internet.
The usual occurred, started out fun, then blacked out and sent mean texts to my boyfriend.
Called Havana Cuba, which I shouldn't have done for a number of reasons....
And now the self hate tape is playing on repeat.

I think I'm going to watch a serial killer documentary ( at least I'm not as horrible as that!!!)

Thanks everyone xoxo

P.S. Sorry if I've offended any serial killers on here <3

daxemus

(((Copper))) - so glad you told us and I am emboldened by your courage in honesty. The amazing thing is, you never have to drink again. This can be your final day two. Even if you want to, you don't have to. One of the things that impresses me about you is your openness to suggestions. I like the toolbox for cravings. I like the looking back and determining what you need. All good stuff. Add me to your list. PM me if you want to drink or use. It will alert me that you need to talk. This action will keep me sober as well. We can do this.

(((Jsbodhi))) - waking with the demoralized feeling of drinking and a written record of actions is rough. And it's a great reminder why this solution is just not working anymore. We drank because it worked for awhile. And then it didn't. There's a quote I saw recently, "Don't keep looking for happiness in the places that you lost it." Yes. That's me all over. Relapse is part of my story so I am right there with you. I agree, too, that this is a serious, weighty, fatal disease we are fighting. "The illusion that we can drink like normal men and women has to be smashed." (Big Book) glad you are here. I believe in you. We can do this.

Tonks - that TED talk is my fave. Thanks for posting it. I will watch again and enjoy it thoroughly.

The enneagram is a blast. I want me wife and son to take it. I have inklings of what they would be, but not certain.

Heading out to help my wife pick out some shoes that will hopefully help her ankle. I HATE shopping. Vehemently hate shopping. So. Yeah. I'm pretty amazing at husbanding right now. (Cue "I Can Be Your Hero Baby")

Love you guys. Like a lot. No, like even more than what you're thinking. Like, take what you're thinking and add like 100 to it. Yeah. Like that.

Love.

Dax

OmoRose

Quick check in.

Not much time of late to do so, but today I can.

Best wishes kin.

brynn

So glad to see you, Js! I hope you can stop playing that self-hate tape sooner than later. It serves no purpose but to keep us stuck in the past. Please be gentle wit yourself today, alright? ❤️

Have fun shopping Dax!! and yes...you deserve a gold star!

Hi omorose! Hope you're doing good! We miss you around here!

Sorry about the roller coaster, Erin! no fun, I know!

BBQBiker

Good Afternoon Littermates.
So much going on in the litter. The common denominator is that whatever happens we are here for each other and that is a rare treasure. For those that have stumbled I am so glad you are back and feel the strength of the litter.

I woke feeling better and healing. That lead me to overdo it. Too much physical stuff for 48 hours post surgery. Oh well. My hubbies and I are going to a movie at a real movie theater this evening. We have not done that in many, many years. Probably going to see American Sniper.

Love you all and I'll check in later.