Class of December 2014 Part 6
36
Not 37. Which I told people for the last three months when I realized about a week ago that I was wrong.
I am 36. I look 25.
Our son is 24. (Adopted him when he was a teen). He looks 45.
We confuse people. Often.
Not 37. Which I told people for the last three months when I realized about a week ago that I was wrong.
I am 36. I look 25.
Our son is 24. (Adopted him when he was a teen). He looks 45.
We confuse people. Often.
Tonks! *tackles and hugs then up loping about * Life and glorious wild times to you! *smiles & grins*
Hi MidWest! It's wonderful to see you again.
And all the rest! I was lost in the forest awhile.
Don't you love, right now, gazing up at the crescent moon but seeing it so much more distintly round as the true orb it is in the sky? Full moon is amazing, but that cresent, makes it pop right out, that roundness, presence.
Howl! *grins*
Edit. To be fair , will be 42 on Superbowl Sunday. *laughs*
Hi MidWest! It's wonderful to see you again.
And all the rest! I was lost in the forest awhile.
Don't you love, right now, gazing up at the crescent moon but seeing it so much more distintly round as the true orb it is in the sky? Full moon is amazing, but that cresent, makes it pop right out, that roundness, presence.
Howl! *grins*
Edit. To be fair , will be 42 on Superbowl Sunday. *laughs*
Hi December friends. I am struggling, what else is new? I am handling this all wrong, I know it and I can't go on like this. But there's always a reason, always an excuse, isn't there?
I truly love each and every one of you and the ways you have shared your stories, been so honest, supported me and each other. This is a family I don't want to lose.
I joined this group December 1st with a commitment to remain sober. I wanted it. But unexpected things happened and I used them as an excuse, for the better part of the last 2 months, to use alcohol as a crutch. I failed, over and over. My best, strongest, most positive days were when I didn't drink. It's so obvious. So I'm not giving up. I know that the best thing for myself, my life, and my family is to end this tie I have to alcohol.
Tomorrow is a new day and a new commitment. I will be in bed soon. Tomorrow my dad, mom, stepmom, brother, and my two daughters will attend church led by a man who has been trying to help my dad. I am not very religious, but try to find spiritual connections everywhere .
I want to handle all of this Better, I know I can and I will.
I promise I will be a better supporter and friend to all of you. There is just so little of me left right now. I read all of your post and my heart and thoughts are with each of you. You are amazing )
I truly love each and every one of you and the ways you have shared your stories, been so honest, supported me and each other. This is a family I don't want to lose.
I joined this group December 1st with a commitment to remain sober. I wanted it. But unexpected things happened and I used them as an excuse, for the better part of the last 2 months, to use alcohol as a crutch. I failed, over and over. My best, strongest, most positive days were when I didn't drink. It's so obvious. So I'm not giving up. I know that the best thing for myself, my life, and my family is to end this tie I have to alcohol.
Tomorrow is a new day and a new commitment. I will be in bed soon. Tomorrow my dad, mom, stepmom, brother, and my two daughters will attend church led by a man who has been trying to help my dad. I am not very religious, but try to find spiritual connections everywhere .
I want to handle all of this Better, I know I can and I will.
I promise I will be a better supporter and friend to all of you. There is just so little of me left right now. I read all of your post and my heart and thoughts are with each of you. You are amazing )
Wow class, I just can't seem to keep up with all the posts! Moving along quickly.
I've had a too busy of a day. Meeting at 9 am, came home, made brunch, walked doggies, watched my grandson, cooked dinner, cleaned up, and went to the gorcery for a few too good items on sale to pass up!
Being busy is good, but I'm feeling a bit overworked today. Need to find a balance. It goes this way with me when I'm sober. I tend to take on and do too much, then I'm left feeling depleted.
I'm recently new to AA again, and I'm already starting to have issues with people there. I can't attend 90 meetings in 90 days. They are getting pissy about this. I haven't found a sponser yet, because I'm looking for the right fit for me. They insist I get one NOW, even a temp one.
Talked to the guy who gave the lead meeting today, and told him a bit about my past, and how I was once a social drinker. Then somewhere I crossed the line, and couldn't even tell you when that happened. But, its true.
He was like, so you really believe you were once just a social drinker? I said yes. I agreed the root of the cause, or disease was there all along, it just hadn't progressed that far, yet. I was upset because he wanted to change facts, as I see and know them, about my drinking journey. That's why its called a progressive disease, right? Or am I wrong ?
Most people there have been super supportive so far, but this has left me thinking I'm not sure about AA again. However, I will keep going for awhile. I perhaps need to seek out other means of support? I'm not knocking AA at all, but if they keep trying to discount my story, and facts, as I see and know them, then all is lost there. I refuse to be brainwashed. I'm trying to take what I need there, and leave the rest, but they don't seem ok with that. What to do? I feel pressured already! At 9 days in? What?
I feel like no matter what I try, or do, it just doesn't seem to be a good program for me? I can't afford physc visits, or an inpatient, or outpatient program. I don't think I need that, but a counselor would probably be a good start. Can't afford that either.
Sorry for this all about ME post, I'm just confused, and a bit bewildered about what I should do next.
Thanks all for being here, and just listening. Of course, any and all thoughts, comments will be great.
Blessings to all.
I've had a too busy of a day. Meeting at 9 am, came home, made brunch, walked doggies, watched my grandson, cooked dinner, cleaned up, and went to the gorcery for a few too good items on sale to pass up!
Being busy is good, but I'm feeling a bit overworked today. Need to find a balance. It goes this way with me when I'm sober. I tend to take on and do too much, then I'm left feeling depleted.
I'm recently new to AA again, and I'm already starting to have issues with people there. I can't attend 90 meetings in 90 days. They are getting pissy about this. I haven't found a sponser yet, because I'm looking for the right fit for me. They insist I get one NOW, even a temp one.
Talked to the guy who gave the lead meeting today, and told him a bit about my past, and how I was once a social drinker. Then somewhere I crossed the line, and couldn't even tell you when that happened. But, its true.
He was like, so you really believe you were once just a social drinker? I said yes. I agreed the root of the cause, or disease was there all along, it just hadn't progressed that far, yet. I was upset because he wanted to change facts, as I see and know them, about my drinking journey. That's why its called a progressive disease, right? Or am I wrong ?
Most people there have been super supportive so far, but this has left me thinking I'm not sure about AA again. However, I will keep going for awhile. I perhaps need to seek out other means of support? I'm not knocking AA at all, but if they keep trying to discount my story, and facts, as I see and know them, then all is lost there. I refuse to be brainwashed. I'm trying to take what I need there, and leave the rest, but they don't seem ok with that. What to do? I feel pressured already! At 9 days in? What?
I feel like no matter what I try, or do, it just doesn't seem to be a good program for me? I can't afford physc visits, or an inpatient, or outpatient program. I don't think I need that, but a counselor would probably be a good start. Can't afford that either.
Sorry for this all about ME post, I'm just confused, and a bit bewildered about what I should do next.
Thanks all for being here, and just listening. Of course, any and all thoughts, comments will be great.
Blessings to all.
There are all kinds of progressions from my experience here.
There are those who never drank normally - like me - I always drank to get wasted.
There'd be a lot of those drinkers in AA cos the BB view on alcoholism supports that idea.
There's also a lot of people I see here, and who are in AA, who look back to a time when they were normal drinkers.
I don't believe one kind is any worse or any better than any other...the inevitable outcome is the same.
There are those who never drank normally - like me - I always drank to get wasted.
There'd be a lot of those drinkers in AA cos the BB view on alcoholism supports that idea.
There's also a lot of people I see here, and who are in AA, who look back to a time when they were normal drinkers.
I don't believe one kind is any worse or any better than any other...the inevitable outcome is the same.
FABL, stay here with us.
Don't you dare leave! Dates are irrevelant. You're still present you're still with us.
I myself understand your struggle, and believe me, you are still, no matter what, one of our litter mates.
We're here, as different as we are, here for you, for us all. I am proud to know you. Stay here with us. Don't give up, my gal.
You are awesome, be that every day as much as you can. But don't go away. We are here for each other, we love you too.
Don't you dare leave! Dates are irrevelant. You're still present you're still with us.
I myself understand your struggle, and believe me, you are still, no matter what, one of our litter mates.
We're here, as different as we are, here for you, for us all. I am proud to know you. Stay here with us. Don't give up, my gal.
You are awesome, be that every day as much as you can. But don't go away. We are here for each other, we love you too.
I'm trying to give him space now Dee.
He asked me where I wanted to go but he's the type of person that when he's upset it just fills the whole room with tension. ya know?
we'll see how it goes. I don't know if I'm annoying him more by keeping a distance instead of making plans.
There is no talking to him right now though. He's ready for a fight.
I'm really bummed out.
He asked me where I wanted to go but he's the type of person that when he's upset it just fills the whole room with tension. ya know?
we'll see how it goes. I don't know if I'm annoying him more by keeping a distance instead of making plans.
There is no talking to him right now though. He's ready for a fight.
I'm really bummed out.
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