GroundhogDay

Drinking, drinking, and drinking. I suppose tomorrow will be day one. I hate my husband and his whole f****** family. I want a divorce.

Dee74

I'm sorry to hear that GD.

Be gentle with yourself. Maybe stop drinking now, drink some water, get yourself ready to go to bed?

D

Applekat

Sorry Groundhog. I hope you're able to get some sleep and wake up tomorrow to re-evaluate everything with a clear and sober head. Chin up. Go for a long walk tomorrow, too. Hugs.

Deleteda

Hi Groundhog sorry you are having a horrible time, just come right back on here and let us know how you are getting on asap X

Applekat

Check in when you can Groundhog. And the rest of the class!

Day 29 I believe. Hanging on. No NYE plans.

Magellan

GHD - I feel for you! Let's regroup today, rest and reflect. I'm at the same place you are at.

Magellan

HELP!!!! The Holiday AV has gotten me in his grip. It started Christmas Eve with some wine, it was late and we had just finished our Santa fun, I wasn't feeling well, same thing my girls had just got me. Christmas Day was very, very tiring but I made it through and got some good sleep, felt good the next day and with plenty of beer and wine in the house I just thought...why not and it just kept going. I wasn't going to have anything yesterday and was actually putting away some decorations and getting the house in order and starting to prepare for the New Year and better, healthier habits and thought a beer or a lot would be great. beer, wine, etc.etc.i feel like crap. Yes, I did go into the garage first thing, before I become "rational" and opened the rest of the beer and dumped it out. I seem to be getting worse with drinking as I am getting more resolve to quit, I don't get it, makes no sense. I have to stop today!! I have the tools I just need to use them, it isn't that difficult but it is. I feel so tired and weak, I guess drinking, the holidays and the flu are catching up. I have this week off from work so I need to reorder my life.

GroundhogDay

I'm very sorry I posted this. I didn't mean it. I love them. I am angry with my husband, and the alcohol-fueled monster inside me took over. Luckily, I didn't have so much that I am hungover. Just a little dehydrated.

Day 1

ubntubnt

GHD, just draw a line and move on now. You sound upset and that's fair enough but please try to stay positive. Maybe go for a nice fresh walk and think about how you need to tweak your sobriety plan to move on stronger from this? I feel sad to read your posts but we have all been there many times and know that you can move on....

ubntubnt

Magellan, it's interesting to compare your posts with those of Dee for example. Yours sound like a terribly nice guy who really wants to stop drinking as you know it's hurting you. Dee's sound like he would crawl through he/l itself on his hands and knees to avoid that first drink. So, how much do you want this?

ubntubnt

Day 15 here. I am stopping over in the Middle East for a few days on my way back to Asia so not drinking should be easier here as u need to drive everywhere and am with family.

My god, the carb and sugar cravings are just insane and are not stopping. I think I have put on 2 or 3kg in the last couple of weeks and am waking up starving in the middle of the night. 6 weeks in is this normal? I didn't have a good appetite for years when drinking so I am indulging it at the moment. Anyone have any tips to try to sort this out? I know it's a tiny problem as long as I stay sober. The thing is though that I feel if I try too many things (gym, healthy eating, stop smoking and stop drinking) I will break and I am ok with breaking on the first three but what if it's the drink that gives, that would be a total disaster.

workforit

Magellan, it has taken me many attempts and false starts, too. I feel like each one, though, has strengthened my resolve a little more -- may it do so for you as well. You know this is not the life you want. Hugs.

Groundhogday, tough day, huh? We have all been there. You can do this.

Okay, gang. New Years coming up soon. What's your plan?

ubntubnt

3 days to go to New Years....DO NOT give yourself an excuse to drink for three days until then. Do not drink today, or tomorrow. Use the sober time to line up your plan for 2015. That's my plan.

SleepyDots

Magellan, you said "it isn't that difficult but it is", that sums things up nicely. Bad habits are hard to break!

I am on Day 37, I had a couple temptations over the last few days but I ignored them. I hope this is not insensitive to say, but when I thought about the possibility of drinking I thought about the people here who have had a drink or two, nothing crazy, but then it's often fairly quickly followed by another drinking episode, then another. I say this with NO judgment whatsoever, it's just such a good reminder to me of earlier in the year - I chose to have a single beer after 2 months of sobriety and that was the start of me rolling faster and faster back down that hill I had just climbed. No matter how hard it is to stay sober, it is SO much harder when you are fresh from a drink. It is a good reminder for us all, and for those back in the early days, huge hugs and support!!

TopEndChick

Mag and GHD... We've let ourselves be caught up in the madness. I'm all over the shop too. People make me sad!

At least we're self aware enough to acknowledge it and move on.

luvmygirls

No matter how hard it is to stay sober, it is SO much harder when you are fresh from a drink.

So, so, so true! I feel like, as with all things, momentum is everything (whether that momentum is upward or downward!) Magellan and GHD, I am right there with you in this struggle. I alternate between believing that I just don't want sobriety bad enough, to thinking that if I can just get through THIS (whatever "this" is at the moment), then I will be OK. The problem, as we all know, is that it's always going to be something.

I am so looking forward to returning to work tomorrow, even though I'm only working 2 days this week. I need the structure, the interaction with non-family members, the routine. I hate to wish the holidays away, because there have been so many good times, but I'm so ready for this whole thing to be over.

gypsytears

Now that you've tasted sobriety it seems harder, yet you want it more. The more you know, the less you know... Or whatever that saying is .

Reorder, regroup, remember what it is you want.

Use your tools.

The thing about AA that makes sense to me (and I'm not big on AA really but do like meetings, sometimes... Just like I like going to Mass, sometimes lol)...is the exchange of phone numbers. If you feel you're going to drink, you're supposed to reach out BEFORE that first drink. Or, come here BEFORE that first drink. If you can use the tools and support BEFORE the AV chokes you into submission you will get stronger every time.

gypsytears

I've been there too. Emotions run high sometimes and we all say things we don't mean. Water, and time help lots.

TopEndChick

I fired my sponsor today. I really wanted to actively disengage myself from him for a few reasons. I feel so vulnerable now.

11Stars

GHD - I have been there so many times you are not alone. Waking up to "I said what??!" Is no fun. Hugs to you we are all here for you with lots of EMPATHY. 👍