No matter how hard it is to stay sober, it is SO much harder when you are fresh from a drink.
So, so, so true! I feel like, as with all things, momentum is everything (whether that momentum is upward or downward!) Magellan and GHD, I am right there with you in this struggle. I alternate between believing that I just don't want sobriety bad enough, to thinking that if I can just get through THIS (whatever "this" is at the moment), then I will be OK. The problem, as we all know, is that it's always going to be something.
I am so looking forward to returning to work tomorrow, even though I'm only working 2 days this week. I need the structure, the interaction with non-family members, the routine. I hate to wish the holidays away, because there have been so many good times, but I'm so ready for this whole thing to be over.