Babs1234

Nice to hear from you too Paul---good job on 110 days.

Viperidae

Scout that is a great volunteer job to go for. I would love that. I'm still kicking around here. Making serious considerations as to how I am to make this work for me. Meetings? uggghhh. I'd like to just take off for Vermont and stay there for a 60 days. Get the time behind me and go from there. Proven to be much more difficult than I imagined.

Missed you guys so wanted to say hi.

ScoutBall

johnny:
I know it isn't always this simple, but at it's most basic it is. Just don't drink, right now.
Keep stringing that along, and pretty soon you'll find the time gets longer and longer.
I'm 100 odd days now, and couldn't really imagine being back where I started. Despite not being able to imagine it, I'm exactly one sip from being there again.

I'm excited about the volunteer opportunity. Got an email this morning--formulated a rational, non-insane artist reply, so we'll see what happens.

Viperidae

Thanks Scout. It is that simple. I have all these things going through my head that I need to do something drastic because what I am doing does not work. Too bad antibuse makes me feel like death. I am going to consider my options and talk to my doctor. If I had 50 grand for REAL rehab, I'd go in a minute. My options are very limited given no real insurance or money. I'll have to create it myself.

I know this, and this should be enough. When I drink I turn into a completely different person. A total ass%%%. The first drink causes a blackout, and a total shift in personality. I am going to end up in big trouble if I go out again.

DG0409

Well done on 110 Paul!!

DG0409

Johnny, the thing that works for me is waking up each day and deciding that just for today I'm not going to drink.

You might want to check out the 24-hour club here. All you gotta do is commit to not drinking for the next 24-hours. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-10-a.html

Soberpotamus

Well done, Paul

Soberpotamus

Great job on the rational non-insane reply, Scout

DrakeCKC

Paul for 110, I am right there too.

It was a good day, won a battle I had been fighting, but lost (probably) another with the Almighty Google. We are getting a hyperfast fiber optic internet/tv system in our area and where 2 of my managed buildings are located. They keep changing their policy on condo eligibility and have done it again, just when I thought we fought this several months ago. They are hard to deal with. Usually when I had a blow up, which I did, I would reach for a drink or twelve, and I did... club and lime.

Now if that combo is illegal or addictive... I am just a lost cause!

But I know what you mean, I could be one sip away from starting again as well. But I just don't want to go thru all that again.

Hang in there class!

Soberpotamus

Drake, wtg! That's awesome Club and lime is the best.

Viperidae

Thanks. Good advice from all. I will do the 24 for today posts. Also, just don't drink, and create schedule, work on meds without getting discuraged and drinking because I feel terrible. Prozac has hit a brick wall with me at this point. A switch is in order.

I talked to my old man today, and he understands the situation and is willing to help me go to VT even for a few weeks if I decide that I will make that a 'rehab' locale. I understand I need to come back here, but I need to get some time again, and strength.

So I opened my mail box today to an IMPORTANT NOTICE from the power company. It was a shutoff notice and I owe them $446. I was like wwaaahhhhttt???? It's supposed to automatically come out of the bank account every month. The bill has not been paid since early april, and I have been running AC. My brother handles my bills. He paid the entire bill right away, thank god. I wonder if that hit my credit score even more?? I have applied for a new credit card with my father as co-applicant, at a credit union. They said if the co-applicant has good credit, it should be all set, now there are all kinds of issues. We'll see. I need the card to rebuild my credit and so that I can travel.

Well I had a very adventurous evening, eating pizza and watching PBS documentaries on the German V2 Rocket, and German Submarine Warfare. Actually stimulating, if you're a dude. Now to open up Netflix and find an entertaining movie of some kind. I can always rewatch 30 Rock, tooooo funny.

Soberpotamus

I love submarine movies and documentaries too I have no idea why. I think it's because of Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea; I read it when I was 12 and fell in love with that book.

DG0409

Johnny, now I want pizza too!!

Day 108 no alcohol here and day 8 no weed.

Babs1234

knumb meeee pizza me toooo.

Viperidae

Hi, checking in. Made the decision today for today. Posted in the 24 hours posting area committing to another 24 for me.

Last night I watched Broken Flowers on Netflix till 1a.m., another one of the later dark Bill Murray films. Pretty good.

Talk later. Thanks all.

ScoutBall

Hiya 'Coots.
Hope all is well in BandicootLand. I am sitting at my computer after a good session of vacant staring at my easel.
Trying to get motivated. This waking up early to play (cue Liam Neeson voiceover) TENNIS BALL RAMPAGE is making me tired. But, not like lethargy tired--actually physically tired.
If anyone reads about a guy face down on a beach in Hawaii, with a dog dropping a tennis ball on his head repeatedly: you know what happened to me.

As much of a pain in the ass it is to get moving in the morning, it really does set the tone for the day, and I feel a lot better, and more "with it". Whatever that means.

As for all of us: it's a start.
Be well today guys. Catch ya later.
-sb

DG0409

Johnny good to hear you joined in the 24 hour thread.

Soberpotamus

Reminds me of a quote I read recently: How you get up in the morning will play a big part in how high you go up in life.

Lol, I'd hate to think it's true sometimes because of the manner in which I get out of bed, the thoughts running through my mind

I think you could do a comic on just some guy waking up everyday, over and over... and the ridiculous and funny things that happen as a result of his first thoughts on awakening... kinda Groundhog Day-esque.

DrakeCKC

Scout.. I started a routine awhile back getting up earlier and being active. It does set a good tone for the day. And with out booze, I am not crashing dead before 8PM anymore so I have more time.

Good move on the 24 hour commitment thread Johnny, I used it a lot. Sometimes it is just day by day, hour by hour.

Had a busy day, we finally got a bit of rain. Had my first garden tomatoes for the season.. nothing better.

All from here. Take care class!

Viperidae

Thanks DG and Drake, they sent me a welcome email that had lots of pictures of puppies. I started crying. Haha, seriously, I'm such a sap.

Talked to the psychiatrist to work on my Med situation. We decided that next week if I still feel the same, I will go to Lexapro instead. I'm a person that has serious clinical depression. Next I need to get my teeth cleaned like someone else did here. I'm scared. I should call tomorrow.

Well, I called on the status of the credit card and the woman told me I was good to go I just needed to join the credit union by opening a savings account (because the Visa card from the credit union). So I went down and opened one with 20 bucks and they sent off a message to let the woman handling my case know. Should have a card soon. You can't really be driving around without some kind of emergency backup in the pocket. Also, I can rebuild my credit now, which will make a big difference.

Ok, well, I'm gonna lie down and find some netflix again.