August Sobriety Group Pt 6
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Sunny South
Posts: 1,666
TB-glad to see you are here, and still with us. Can you go to an ER? Your fragile state of body and mind worries me. They could detox you and get some fluids in you..maybe even finally get you past the flu symptoms you can't shake. Your choice to finish the semester,
but, is it truly worth the price right now?
Do you have your AA phone list? Someone on there might be able to help you find a rehab, or point you in the right direction. The Salavation Army can always help too.
TB ((((hugs)))), I care about you...and love you.
but, is it truly worth the price right now?
Do you have your AA phone list? Someone on there might be able to help you find a rehab, or point you in the right direction. The Salavation Army can always help too.
TB ((((hugs)))), I care about you...and love you.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 660
Good Morning! :) :) :)
August Friends ----> LOVE, HUGS and ALL THAT GOOD STUFF! :) :) :)
SO GOOD to see you (((Richard)))! :) :) :)
I have been trying to keep up with the posts...Things are crazy, but good...I think of you all each day and carry you with me always! I will try to get some quality time on here soon! I've been so focused on getting my life together, I've lost track of my days...I cannot remember the last time I had a drink. I think it's been a few weeks? At least? Regardless, I'm feeling good and very determined! :) :) :)
You all amaze and inspire me...we are SO BLESSED in this thread!
Love,
August Friends ----> LOVE, HUGS and ALL THAT GOOD STUFF! :) :) :)
SO GOOD to see you (((Richard)))! :) :) :)
I have been trying to keep up with the posts...Things are crazy, but good...I think of you all each day and carry you with me always! I will try to get some quality time on here soon! I've been so focused on getting my life together, I've lost track of my days...I cannot remember the last time I had a drink. I think it's been a few weeks? At least? Regardless, I'm feeling good and very determined! :) :) :)
You all amaze and inspire me...we are SO BLESSED in this thread!
Love,
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: up north
Posts: 102
Hi guys!
Did anyone else check out the Leonids last night?
I got my butt out of bed at 4:30 am, got dressed and went outside to gaze upon the heavens...It was COLD!!! Holy cow! I live in a rural area, and the sky was very clear last night, so even without the meteor shower, it would have been beautiful. I sat out in a chair for half an hour in the frozen silence and was lucky enough to see 8 shooting stars....Two were quite spectacular.
This is something that would have never happened in my old life.
It was a gift.
Brent, all this talk of hunting camp, but no mention of the giant buck you got?!
Did you get one?
Hubby is away hunting his family's land this weekend. He got a deer on Saturday, tried for another yesterday with no luck. He's bringing it home today (the hunting camp is 5 hrs away) stuffed in the back of the car, lol! Looks like we'll be butchering this weekend...Mmmmmmmm, fresh venison.
I can really relate with what you said about your walk in the Hills. How different to be sober and enjoy nature in all its beauty.
I feel the most connection to my own spirituality when in the woods. SUCH a different experience being out there sober--and feeling a part of the beauty around me instead of being separated from nature by that fog of booze.
Ugh, I've just finished up my first POT of coffee. I drink that stuff like CRAZY now. I'm even starting to get quite a taste for the powdered creamer stuff that they seem to have at every single AA meeting I've ever been to... LOL!
Take care my wonderful August crew!
Did anyone else check out the Leonids last night?
I got my butt out of bed at 4:30 am, got dressed and went outside to gaze upon the heavens...It was COLD!!! Holy cow! I live in a rural area, and the sky was very clear last night, so even without the meteor shower, it would have been beautiful. I sat out in a chair for half an hour in the frozen silence and was lucky enough to see 8 shooting stars....Two were quite spectacular.
This is something that would have never happened in my old life.
It was a gift.
Brent, all this talk of hunting camp, but no mention of the giant buck you got?!
Did you get one?
Hubby is away hunting his family's land this weekend. He got a deer on Saturday, tried for another yesterday with no luck. He's bringing it home today (the hunting camp is 5 hrs away) stuffed in the back of the car, lol! Looks like we'll be butchering this weekend...Mmmmmmmm, fresh venison.
I can really relate with what you said about your walk in the Hills. How different to be sober and enjoy nature in all its beauty.
I feel the most connection to my own spirituality when in the woods. SUCH a different experience being out there sober--and feeling a part of the beauty around me instead of being separated from nature by that fog of booze.
Ugh, I've just finished up my first POT of coffee. I drink that stuff like CRAZY now. I'm even starting to get quite a taste for the powdered creamer stuff that they seem to have at every single AA meeting I've ever been to... LOL!
Take care my wonderful August crew!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Sunny South
Posts: 1,666
Sphal...
I meant to go out and check out the Leonids last night, but, I didn't set my alarm to wake me up...so, I slept right thru all of it!
BreakFree...good to see you here..and congrats on the sober time!!!
Gloomy day here, weather wise, but, I am not going to let it make me feel gloomy!
I meant to go out and check out the Leonids last night, but, I didn't set my alarm to wake me up...so, I slept right thru all of it!
BreakFree...good to see you here..and congrats on the sober time!!!
Gloomy day here, weather wise, but, I am not going to let it make me feel gloomy!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: South Dakota, USA
Posts: 1,429
Welcome back TB! Like others in here, we are worried about you. It sounds like you need help NOW, not 60 days from now. I mean, something terrible could happen to you before you get into treatment. You say you are not sure how much follow up will actually take place? Here is a saying I use in my business every day: You have to inspect what you expect. Things don't happen for people that let it happen. Action takes place when you MAKE it happen. Please don't sit by and watch things unfold. Take action, and look out for yourself!
Sphal- I can't believe you got up at 4:30 AM to go look at the stars! Crazy girl!
I totally understand what you mean though about enjoying nature it all of its beauty when you are sober. SO amazing! As for the big buck..... didn't happen 
The area my tag was in we didn't even SEE a deer. So I didn't even fire a shot. But I don't care. It was so amazing just to be out there. I do have a tag for a season that opens this weekend close to my house. So hopefully I get my big buck this weekend! I will be out there, sitting in a field at 5:30 AM in the freezing cold on Saturday morning. And I am soooo looking forward to it! I can't believe your hubby is putting his deer in the car! haha. Get that guy a pick-up already will you?
I went to another AA meeting last night. I went to dinner with the guys from last week. The one guy goes back to Arizona today, and I am really going to miss him. He has been so crucial in my recovery so far. He gave me a hug last night, and made me promise to call him and keep in touch with him. The guy that is dieing of cancer offered last night to be my sponsor and told me he would be honored to do it, but told me to have a back-up in case he isn't around to see me finish all of the steps. How sad is that?!?! I got tears in my eyes talking to him about this last night. Here he is dieing and still offering to help ME?!?!
OK, so off to another sober day. Day 9 I think? All I know is my sobriety date is November 9th. It is circled on my calendar. Hugs and love to all of you.
Sphal- I can't believe you got up at 4:30 AM to go look at the stars! Crazy girl!
I totally understand what you mean though about enjoying nature it all of its beauty when you are sober. SO amazing! As for the big buck..... didn't happen 
The area my tag was in we didn't even SEE a deer. So I didn't even fire a shot. But I don't care. It was so amazing just to be out there. I do have a tag for a season that opens this weekend close to my house. So hopefully I get my big buck this weekend! I will be out there, sitting in a field at 5:30 AM in the freezing cold on Saturday morning. And I am soooo looking forward to it! I can't believe your hubby is putting his deer in the car! haha. Get that guy a pick-up already will you? I went to another AA meeting last night. I went to dinner with the guys from last week. The one guy goes back to Arizona today, and I am really going to miss him. He has been so crucial in my recovery so far. He gave me a hug last night, and made me promise to call him and keep in touch with him. The guy that is dieing of cancer offered last night to be my sponsor and told me he would be honored to do it, but told me to have a back-up in case he isn't around to see me finish all of the steps. How sad is that?!?! I got tears in my eyes talking to him about this last night. Here he is dieing and still offering to help ME?!?!
OK, so off to another sober day. Day 9 I think? All I know is my sobriety date is November 9th. It is circled on my calendar. Hugs and love to all of you.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The Sunny South
Posts: 1,666
Brent...I am truly amazed at the AA program, and the men God has placed in your life. A man with terminal cancer offered to be your sponsor...it doesn't get any better then that!
The tradition, the requirement that you have a desire to stop drinking to go to AA...
that resonates in my mind...my desire to stop was great, my desire to live is far greater.
The tradition, the requirement that you have a desire to stop drinking to go to AA...
that resonates in my mind...my desire to stop was great, my desire to live is far greater.
Owner of a strange glitch.
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: midsouth
Posts: 2,331
Morning y'all.
Yeah, the future looks scary and I'm tired. No time to rest, though, I have to move today. Then go for a four hour bus ride (there and back) to a 5 minute "hi how you doing meeting." Then class... I don't know if I went to this class last Thursday, and if so... oh boy. The only thing I can think of that I might have done something (extra) stupid in.
Never been to the Black Hills, that and a bunch of the Interior... I'll get there though. TB used to love to travel... back when I was working and had money and days off... amazing how far you can get on a week's pay and a 3 day weekend. I was aiming for visiting every state by 30. Won't make that goal because I let college entice me, but... 34?
Tired tired tired. Won't be giving up... I don't think. Of all the things that happen to a person when they're left alone, it's finding the motivation to keep going that's the hardest. There's nobody there to either cheer you on or dismiss you dreams--both of which can motivate someone. Instead, all you see is other people laughing and holding hands... and know you are not welcome there.
Lot of times I feel like I live in a hamster ball.
Well, see y'all later.
TB, not wanting to do all the stuff today tomorrow and Thursday that she has to do.
Yeah, the future looks scary and I'm tired. No time to rest, though, I have to move today. Then go for a four hour bus ride (there and back) to a 5 minute "hi how you doing meeting." Then class... I don't know if I went to this class last Thursday, and if so... oh boy. The only thing I can think of that I might have done something (extra) stupid in.
Never been to the Black Hills, that and a bunch of the Interior... I'll get there though. TB used to love to travel... back when I was working and had money and days off... amazing how far you can get on a week's pay and a 3 day weekend. I was aiming for visiting every state by 30. Won't make that goal because I let college entice me, but... 34?
Tired tired tired. Won't be giving up... I don't think. Of all the things that happen to a person when they're left alone, it's finding the motivation to keep going that's the hardest. There's nobody there to either cheer you on or dismiss you dreams--both of which can motivate someone. Instead, all you see is other people laughing and holding hands... and know you are not welcome there.
Lot of times I feel like I live in a hamster ball.
Well, see y'all later.
TB, not wanting to do all the stuff today tomorrow and Thursday that she has to do.
- 
- 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 367
Bubba I can only imagine the Hell you are going through although I have had my own version of it repeatedly.
8 days ago I started bawling my eyes out.
The insanity of the treadmill was driving me right over the deep end...
I was a grown man crying his eyes out...
I prayed like I never had before for help and believe me I'm not much into religion..
It's been 8 days sober now and somehow this attempt seems different.
This time I'm truly grateful for being sober. I'm reflecting on this in the mornings and in the evenings before bed in quiet introspection.
Bubba, if your grateful for something , you're not going to give it up easily.
Being sober and living without drinking is something to be enjoyed, not endured.
Make it through today Bubba without drinking and be grateful tonight.
Don't give up.
8 days ago I started bawling my eyes out.
The insanity of the treadmill was driving me right over the deep end...
I was a grown man crying his eyes out...
I prayed like I never had before for help and believe me I'm not much into religion..
It's been 8 days sober now and somehow this attempt seems different.
This time I'm truly grateful for being sober. I'm reflecting on this in the mornings and in the evenings before bed in quiet introspection.
Bubba, if your grateful for something , you're not going to give it up easily.
Being sober and living without drinking is something to be enjoyed, not endured.
Make it through today Bubba without drinking and be grateful tonight.
Don't give up.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: South Dakota, USA
Posts: 1,429
Just got back from lunch with a bunch of alcoholics! What a great group. 3 more guys gave me their phone numbers if I need to find a meeting or just a person to talk to. I don't even ask, they just tell me to write their number down. Amazing how many people are there to help!
I got a list of a bunch of non-smoking meetings that are not published on line or in a directory. They are not secret, but just not everyone knows about them. They are spin offs from the main AA groups. I relate it closely to various denominations of Christianity. All have the same goal, but some times people break off and start their own denomination. IE: Lutheran, Methodist, Catholic, etc. Same with AA. So I feel like I have found the group I like and belong with, so now I have the list of when and where they meet.
So, that is where I am at today. Feeling great, and ready to rock another day sober! WHOO HOO!
Richard- Very good wisdom and knowledge there. That is exactly what AA does. It teaches you how to LIVE, not just be sober. There is a HUGE difference!
I got a list of a bunch of non-smoking meetings that are not published on line or in a directory. They are not secret, but just not everyone knows about them. They are spin offs from the main AA groups. I relate it closely to various denominations of Christianity. All have the same goal, but some times people break off and start their own denomination. IE: Lutheran, Methodist, Catholic, etc. Same with AA. So I feel like I have found the group I like and belong with, so now I have the list of when and where they meet.
So, that is where I am at today. Feeling great, and ready to rock another day sober! WHOO HOO!
Richard- Very good wisdom and knowledge there. That is exactly what AA does. It teaches you how to LIVE, not just be sober. There is a HUGE difference!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Portland, Oregon
Posts: 711
TB, I agree with Richard, take it one day at a time, live moment to moment. Looking at the big picture is just going to stress you out.
Brent- it is so good to hear how well you are doing. My grand-sponsor has step meetings at her house that are just for a small group of us too. It is more intimate like that and makes it easier to share.
Brent- it is so good to hear how well you are doing. My grand-sponsor has step meetings at her house that are just for a small group of us too. It is more intimate like that and makes it easier to share.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: up north
Posts: 102
Brent, Hubby HAS a pick-up! (not sure it's possible to survive winter without 4WD where we live!)
Thing is, gas costs a heck of a lot more (esp. traveling 5 hours each way) in the truck, so he decided to take the car.
Hubby just called, he's on his way and he is bringing TWO deer home. How he fit them both in a PT cruiser is beyond me.
p.s.
I didn't think that smoking meetings existed any more! Wow, every meeting I've ever been to is smoke free. I need to find myself a smokers meeting, LOL!
Thing is, gas costs a heck of a lot more (esp. traveling 5 hours each way) in the truck, so he decided to take the car.
Hubby just called, he's on his way and he is bringing TWO deer home. How he fit them both in a PT cruiser is beyond me.
p.s.
I didn't think that smoking meetings existed any more! Wow, every meeting I've ever been to is smoke free. I need to find myself a smokers meeting, LOL!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: South Dakota, USA
Posts: 1,429
Sphal- That is just gross. I can't imagine the smell that is in the car now, and the smell that will linger afterwords! haha. Good luck with that. Yeah, it is expensive to fill those things up with gas. I have just accepted it.
As for the smoking AA meetings, if you want one come on out to SD. We still have them at the main clubhouse where a lot of the meetings take place. I have never been there but that is what everyone says.
As for the smoking AA meetings, if you want one come on out to SD. We still have them at the main clubhouse where a lot of the meetings take place. I have never been there but that is what everyone says.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 957
Thirtybubba, so glad that U R moving and that U have put that damn bottle down.
New beginning, new roomates, (Hopefully ya'll will get along, keep a low profile.) now newly sober and now a new start.
Please hold on to that. U can not continue 2 drink, nothing ever comes from abusing that poison, only bad, awful outcomes, nevermind feeling like crap.
Hang in there, this semester is almost over.
Stay strong.
New beginning, new roomates, (Hopefully ya'll will get along, keep a low profile.) now newly sober and now a new start.
Please hold on to that. U can not continue 2 drink, nothing ever comes from abusing that poison, only bad, awful outcomes, nevermind feeling like crap.
Hang in there, this semester is almost over.
Stay strong.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Philadelphia, PA area
Posts: 335
KC here. Glad to see that we are all supporting TB. That is so good. TB - hope you are hanging in there. We are here for you!
I just came home from another very long day of work. I am glad about my promotion, but it is probably killing me from a working standpoint. Did not realize that 12-14 hour days were part of the norm.
Still very depressed that my guy friend is not talking to me, and now my hubby is not talking to me. Of course, nothing new there. He stormed out of here Sunday and came home well after I was asleep. Won't go into the gory details, but he has now told me that he is NOT going on our long planned annual 3-week vacation ... which is in one month, 1 weekand 5 days, (but who is counting). He says I am nothing but a total bit*h. Cuz I won't do what he wants me to do. Not sure how much longer I can stand this sobriety. I am trying so hard, but to come home to a hostile environment every night...just drives me to drink. So far so good, but I am caving. And yes, I am trying to find a new counselor or support group to help me. I can't continue to live like this and run a business as well.
I miss my friend! I mentioned this to my hubby, since he was here the night of the meltdown and he said "it serves you right...you were the one who sent him the nasty text and so now he is not talking to you...you made your bed, now lie in it and shut up. Don't blame him if he never talks to you again."
Sigh. I don't CARE if he goes on our annual vacation or not. I really don't. I want my friend back and I don't know how to do it. That is MY FAULT. Cuz I was drunk a week ago tonight!!! So depressing.
Am not looking for sympathy here. Just need to vent. What I did was my own fault. No one elses. I just want my friend back. Not sure what to do. Am thinking about leaving him a VM on Thursday just saying "hey, just checking in. I miss our chats. Was hoping you would have forgiven and forgotten by now, but since you haven't...well, just saying hello."
What do you all think, if you feel like commenting? Can't believe I made a $3,000,000 strategic decision today and can't figure out what to do to try to win a friend back. Hilarious.
KC
I just came home from another very long day of work. I am glad about my promotion, but it is probably killing me from a working standpoint. Did not realize that 12-14 hour days were part of the norm.
Still very depressed that my guy friend is not talking to me, and now my hubby is not talking to me. Of course, nothing new there. He stormed out of here Sunday and came home well after I was asleep. Won't go into the gory details, but he has now told me that he is NOT going on our long planned annual 3-week vacation ... which is in one month, 1 weekand 5 days, (but who is counting). He says I am nothing but a total bit*h. Cuz I won't do what he wants me to do. Not sure how much longer I can stand this sobriety. I am trying so hard, but to come home to a hostile environment every night...just drives me to drink. So far so good, but I am caving. And yes, I am trying to find a new counselor or support group to help me. I can't continue to live like this and run a business as well.
I miss my friend! I mentioned this to my hubby, since he was here the night of the meltdown and he said "it serves you right...you were the one who sent him the nasty text and so now he is not talking to you...you made your bed, now lie in it and shut up. Don't blame him if he never talks to you again."
Sigh. I don't CARE if he goes on our annual vacation or not. I really don't. I want my friend back and I don't know how to do it. That is MY FAULT. Cuz I was drunk a week ago tonight!!! So depressing.
Am not looking for sympathy here. Just need to vent. What I did was my own fault. No one elses. I just want my friend back. Not sure what to do. Am thinking about leaving him a VM on Thursday just saying "hey, just checking in. I miss our chats. Was hoping you would have forgiven and forgotten by now, but since you haven't...well, just saying hello."
What do you all think, if you feel like commenting? Can't believe I made a $3,000,000 strategic decision today and can't figure out what to do to try to win a friend back. Hilarious.
KC
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