traderjane

What's up VC?

ViciousCycle

Purple forgot me. LOL

thirtybubba

Um, post more? Lol...

But, you're okay, right...?




*Dang, I'm not good at being selfish... I oughtta be caring more about me, and here I am...worried that VC won't make her 9 days. Grrr.

ANEWAUGUST

Oh...VC...purple cats have nine lives but bad memories...

How are you doing?

traderjane

Awwwww..... I know I have a hard time recalling everyone in the group on the spot. Maybe we need Breakfree to do a roll call and get a new group "roster"? Leader, where are you?

I feel good that I didn't drink last night and want to do it again tonight. This one day at a time thing is sometimes the only thing that clicks with me. My mind starts racing and I think: How am I not going to drink on Monday night? (when it's only Saturday). I should be thinking about today and today only.

I'm enjoying a quiet weekend. Ahhhhhh.... so nice to have this time. Hope everyone is good.

Laura

thirtybubba

Laura, when that *clicked* for me, I realized why they say one day at a time... it wasn't for all the reasons I had thought it was. It's to stop me from thinking about next Monday...

traderjane

I know it, TB. So I spend all my energy thinking about how I'm not going to drink on Monday.... and forget that the focus should really be on TODAY. Let's keep reminding each other of that.

Just read all the drama on the November group thread.... maybe we don't need a roster -- LOL!

I think drama in any way, shape or form is bad for us. May even cause us to drink. I am so thankful for the lack of drama here with you guys. There is enough drama in everyday life. Nice to have a place to come to where it does not exist.

ANEWAUGUST

Hi all..

I am with you all. I cannot stand drama.

Drama doesn't help when we are drinking, or when we are sober.

It is hard to stay focused on this 24 hours, this day at times. We just need to keep working on being in the present moment, and the decision not to drink, right now, this day.

It is a beautiful day here... I am going to enjoy it to the fullest.

Zebra1275

One day at a time is a key aspect to staying sober. But it's not just worrying about future days and events coming up (like the holidays). It's also about letting the past go, since you can't live that day ever again. I have trouble sometimes forgiving myself for the mistakes I've made in the past, and I bet with some of my regrets, I'm the only one that still remembers them! I tend to be much harder on myself than other people are, and yet I tend to forgive other people pretty easily.

thirtybubba

Do that, ANew. It's what days are for... I think.


Either way, at midnight they're over with... why not enjoy them? Else you're going around wasting them, if you think about it...

And that's close to cardinal sin in California... wasting I mean.

OceanBound

I'm still here too. Day 4 I think but I'm trying not to count. Feeling weird and unsure about my drinking future. But I think I got some of my motivation back so I am spending more time working out and attending SMART online meetings, so hopefully it'll stick.

Have a great day everyone! It's raining cats and dogs here.

Ocean

bananagrrrl

Hey everyone! I am too lazy to recall everyone, but you know who you are!

My husband is at a football game with his friend and I am home alone. I have a party to go to tonight alone, which I am dreading. I told my friend I would go and I can't let her down even though I feel like isolating.

There will be moderate drinking there. Maybe that is one reason I don't feel like going, but also I suffer from social anxiety. It has gotten worse since I stopped drinking. I know it will be good for me to go though, even though it is kind of far away. I hate driving at night.

I really feel like not going and just staying home and watching tv. I am going to call my sponsor later. I know my friend will be upset with me if I don't go and I have no reason not to go. She had this same party last year and Kevin was gone then too and I stayed home and got drunk.

Do I sound crazy here? I am just feeling really anxious. I forgot to take my abilify for two nights so that may have something to do with it.

thirtybubba

OB!! ((hug))

Day 4 is mighty good... the worst of the bad days are almost over.

You are a sneaky one, OB



Banana, you're not irrational... might wanna go, I don't know. Call your sponsor--how's that? You're experiencing life... it was bound to happen to you sooner or later if you put the bottle down...

PurpleCat

I'm sorry. I was afraid I was missing someone. It's not because you are forgettable. (((VC)))

PC <---------

bananagrrrl

I went and it was fun! That is the first party I have been sober in a very long time. Now I will know sometimes I need to push myself.

I did talk to my sponsor before and she said I should do what I wanted to do.

People don't all get drunk. I noticed the ones that were though.

box3

Traderjane, I'm in South Australia. This heatwave has broken all records, I'll gladly trade the heat for the cold stuff. Anono, I'm sorry to hear that your daughter is still very ill, she has my best wishes for a speedy recovery.

I made the choice to drink last night. I spent a considerable amount of time during the course of the evening thinking and talking about what I thought and felt while drinking. I came to the following conclusions:

• I had more fun before the drinking began.
• I cannot moderate my alcohol intake.
• I'm not missing out on anything by not drinking.
• The alcohol initially made me feel anxious and disconnected and then later too cognitively bludgeoned to notice or care.
• I don't like pub environments.
• Drunk people are annoying.
• I spent the whole night desperately chasing an illusionary high which is forever out of my grasp.
• I don't need to drink to have a good time.
• I don't need to drink to feel confidant.
• I don't need to drink to cope.
• Alcohol doesn't make me feel better.
• I can now visualise not drinking on a permanent basis.

box3

bananagrrrl, I have social anxiety too. For me, the anticipatory anxiety is usually worse than the actual social event. Something that helps me is to set a time limit for the event, i.e. an hour. It's important to test and challenge the fear (and the thoughts that contribute to it), otherwise it just grows bigger. If you think that there's a real chance that the party might jeopardize your sobriety, then don't go.

Today I talked about last night with my mother and I found out that my late paternal Grandfather suddenly stopped drinking. I never saw him drink alcohol growing up and he never discussed why he made that choice. I have a hunch that he was an alcoholic too, and he dealt with it. He was a war veteran and suffered from PTSD.

Hugs to everyone, I'm back on board.

ANEWAUGUST

Morning all...

Bananagrrrl...good to hear that you went, and you had a good time. I too suffer from social anxiety, and used to have a drink or two (or twelve,haha) before I would attend events.I am sure not taking the Ambilify didn't help.

Box-great list..and a reminder of what alcohol doesn't bring to our lives.Even though in our romantic alcoholic haze, we remembered it differently.

Had fun last night at our dinner party. Lots of wine, the hosts are true wine lovers. I wasn't tempted to drink. One or two folks were a bit more tipsy then the others but,
truly a light drinking crowd, which is more enjoyable for me.

Another gorgeous day here today...woo hoo!

BreakFree

This was our class list as of September 1st...I apologize in advance if anyone is missing or has been added in error. Just post an update and I will correct! :)

ANGELINA243
ANEWAUGUST*
anono*
auden67
August1909
badrad29
bdiddy5522*
Beckles
bohemianzen
box3*
BreakFree*
BuddhaBear
Carlisle
ChameleonBoy
chrisfire
colly
CriseAbsolute
effortjoy
Gofish
groggles55
Hanker
Jackstone
Jeb18
Johnifer
KC1*
keen2bclean
KindBird
Kjell
krylonB
lastthird
LookingForward
Midton*
millieveronika
OceanBound*
PurpleCat*
Reese321
Richard54
rubycanoe
Shakespeare
sickofthewaste
sphalerite*
tallcactus*
thirtybubba*
TooMuchRum
traderjane*
ViciousCycle*
white horses
wildrover080209
Zebra1275*

*15 of 49 members still active in the thread!

KC1

Sounds like everyone is having a decent weekend. Today is a nice sunny day. Glad the NorIda moved out of here.

Had my fundraiser last night, of which I am the chairperson - a very good reason NOT to drink as I had to keep it all together and make my normal chaiperson speeches, etc. Plus there were 200 people there and I did NOT want to be the slightest bit off my game. We think we raised over $75,000! My husband kept checking my glass (club soda and lime) and it was amazing how many people who have seen me slam back the wine in the past, were trying to get me to drink a glass of wine after it was all over.

My husband and I have been doing a lot of arguing since Tuesday. I am irritable and cranky and of course it is the lack of alcohol in my system. We have already gotten into an argument this morning and he stormed out of here. Being sober has made me notice a pattern here, too. We argue A LOT and I can see myself in the past going for the wine or beer afterwards, particularly on the weekend afternoons. Never noticed that before. Remember me talking about being married, but being alone? Well, here it is in black and white. We were awake 1/2 hour and he has already stormed out of here. Who knows where he went and when he'll be back. Makes for a lovely afternoon.

Everyone have a great day and I'll probably check back in later on tonight.

KC