krisgrace

Hi,
I am a 25 year old single mother of two. It started when I found out my husband had cheated on me for a year and a half. We now live in two different cities, and struggle with our relationship and finances. I have been on the pain pills for about two years. I take Norcos, Lortabs, Vicodin, or whatever I can get (about 5-6 a day). They seemed to mask the emotional pain. I also get migraines very bad. I get prescribed Lortabs every now and again. Which doesnnt really help, only my migraine medicine helps, but I will never admit that to my doctors. I havent been me in so long. I am so ready to stop, but evertime I try the withdrawls bring me back. I am a paralegal, and I cannot go to work dragging. I cannot tell anyone. I am scared to lose my children. I need help and I do not know what to do. If I ask a doctor for this drug that helps with the withdrawls......will the take my kids from me??? I am so scared.. I am out of money, and out of time. I need help desparately. Thanks,
Kristin

Also, I have 14 Lortabs left....should I wein myself off until I see my doctor next week? And should I tell my Psyc? Or stick with my regular doctor? I really dont want to do anything that will leave me kids in a bad situation.
Thanks for reading.

:praying

DavyDave

Hi Kris. Lemme say you've come to a great place for advice. The people here are nice and kind, and most of all non judgemental.

krisgrace

Thanks, It is so weird, bc my husband well I guess you could say soon to be ex is an alcoholic, so I know that side as well. I never understood him. I NEVER thought I would be in this position, but in the last year or two, my life has spun out of control. I do not want to do anything to put my kids in a bad situation, and living with him would be bad. Also, by parents smoke pot, and my mother has bordeline Personality disorder so there is no way I am letting them go there. This is why I am so afraid to tell a dcotor, I cant loose my kids.

splendra

I am glad to see you making an effort to find information for your condition. That shows a lot of strength and character. I think you need to be open with the doctor who prescribed these meds for you.

I got a script for vicoden once and took one before bed and had the worst headache when I woke up and my stomach did not feel too good either. so the migraine could have something to do with the meds you are taking.

I know you are worried about your children but you have to take care of your health so they can depend on you. I don't think your doctor has to report you for taking the meds.

I will be saying a prayer for you. Be gentle with yourself.

Stagebear

If your use is as you described, you're in pretty good shape for weaning, however, it's not my forte. I'm sure others will offer their experience with weaning.

The thing that's going to "leave your kids in a bad situation" is letting your drug use escalate.

It is common for regular users of narcotics to develop dependency. Maybe you could tell a doctor you'd prefer to stop taking the pills but find that when you do you experience withdrawal...a legitimate medical symptom. Perhaps he can assist in a taper.

I'm only going on what you've posted here, if the use is different or other issues are involved, this could be off base.

Thinking of you with sincere caring,

cracker15

If you can ween down to a pill or two pills a day go for it. Do you have any sick days? If so take take a few in the middle of the week so that it runs into the weekend. By the next week you should be feeling a little better or yoat least u will be able to drag yourself to work. You can make it if you want too. Good luck.

christin1225

Kristin,
There's really no downside to trying to taper. So, I say yes... definitely start weaning. Have you ever tried to taper before or have you always tried to quit c/t?

Impurrfect

((Kristin))

Welcome to SR!

We're not supposed to give medical advice, so I won't recommend a tapering dose. If you're doctor is someone you've been seeing, I would be honest and tell him what is going on. I was an RN for years, and I've never known a doctor to report a patient to authorities for trying to get help. In fact, my dr. knows all about my addiction issues and has worked with me. Information between a doctor and a patient is confidential unless there is blatant evidence of child neglect or abuse.

I developed migraines after being hit on the head during a robbery at work a few months ago. I see a neurologist for this, and he says Lortabs actually CAUSE rebound migraines.

I'm glad you are here, and are reaching out for help. The people here are great, and very non-judgmental. We've been where you are, some are still struggling. The most important thing to remember, is you can do this. You deserve a life where you're not a slave to pills.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

windysan

If you have any time off coming up do the withdrawals then. You may fake the flu if you need to. If you can get 3 days off work and you fit a weekend or a long holiday weekend in there you'll have 5 to 6 days to get past the worst of the physical stuff. BTW, I couldn't wean jack 5hit.

krisgrace

Ok, so its 9:00 a.m. I took 2 5mg's Lortabs last night at around 6-ish. Usually I wake up with a major headache and have to take 2 first thing around 6 or 630 a.m. But, I woke up today with no headache!! So I am now having stomach cramps. I was taking these "lowdose" pills about 10 a day. Once in the morning, then around 9, again at 12, at 3, and at 5 or 6. I am going to have only 6 today. 2 at breakfast 2 at lunch and 2 at dinner. Hopefully tomorrow, I can cut that by more....
I hate that all i think about is pills. It really consumes me.

krisgrace

I have tried both c/t and tapering. The c/t was a def. no. I couldnt stand the w/d. And I had a fit until I found pills. Tapering worked. I was down to 3-4 503's (the green pills), then I thought, well If I can taper down and control it, then I dont have a problem...
The "the problem" escalated again...
Stupid me...

Stagebear

With all due respect, apparently it didn't.

krisgrace

Yeah, I guess not. I should have said "I thought it worked." Anyway, I looked up on the internet. There are 3 doctors where I am from that prescribe Suboxone. I will call them. My other doctors, can not prescribe it. Pray for me...

bval

Welcome to the boards Kris ... I see you already replied on lilmama's thread, and as you've astutely observed, your situations are pretty similar. Thus, I would echo to you the same advice I gave her, which you've presumably already read

If I were you, I'd taper down over the course of a few days, take off a thurs/fri/weekend, and you should be through the w/d's to a large extent by Monday. If you're still draggin, hey, it just backs up the story that you were *really* sick the previous week

One other thing ... the amount you're talking about ... although I'm generally a big sub proponent, I really don't think your situation warrants it. Seriously. Subs have withdrawals as well, you aren't going to be getting around that piece by going onto them. I would 'cut your losses' if I were you...

christin1225

Kris,

Bear's thought was my first thought as well. So... here's what I'd like to share with you. I'm assuming (that word can get me into trouble) that you're thinking that the reason it "worked" was because you got to a lower dose and then consciously decided to continue using. Therefore, by saying that it "worked", you actually mean that you have successfully lowered your dose and continued in active addiction. Do I have a correct understanding?

If so...
You know that you can lower your consumption (or that you could lower it at one time, might not be the same anymore). My advice is to keep tapering and to get help ASAP ... call a substance abuse hotline, get to an NA meeting... so that you can quit and stay "quitted" .

Tapering to quit is an entirely different animal from tapering to keep the habit from outrunning the supply.

krisgrace

Also, no one knows, and I dont want anyone to find out. I am a paralegal for a well known Attorneys office. I attend church. My family would DIE! The ONLY one that knows is the "Dealer" that I get them from when my prescription runs out and another girl at work. She is a little younger than me. She is addicted also. She tries to "Act" like she has a better hold of her problem. I am pretty dure she takes the same amount as me, bc we run out at the same time and buy from the same person. She always comes in my office talking about getting more. The last time I tried to quit. I had stopped for 2 days, and I was so sick, and she was talking about getting some and I gave her money to get me some too. I had told her 2 days before that that I was quitting and to not let me get any. She says that everyone has something that they do...
I try to talk to her about quitting but I know she is not ready like me. She is one of my best friends and we work together. What am I going to do about this situation??

christin1225

One situation at a time, Kris. Getting off the pills is enough to deal with right now. Wouldn't you agree?

lilmama

Hi you responded to me I have 3 kids single mother we seem to be in the same boat I wish you luck. I am scared of stopping this weekend more so someone finding out. Everyone thinks I am so "together" no one has any idea I am as dependent as I am. I would love to hear your progress so keep me posted

krisgrace

I am so nervous. It is my friends wedding saturday ....the one who uses....and Sunday is Mardi Gras for us....so party, party over here. I am going to have to be really strong.

Lily

Kris,

I was in the same boat as you a little over a year ago. I asked a gal who had one year how she did it. She said meetings, getting a sponsor and working the steps. I wanted it so bad I took her advice. I got to NA & AA meetings, found clean and sober women to work with (i have had 3 sponsors and are on good terms with all 3) and quit. I felt sooo free! You too can experience this freedom I have, but you HAVE to find some strong support.

Hang in there and do some of the footwork. You can have freedom once again! it feels so awesome to not have to feel ruled by how many pills are in my bottle! I had one year clean on Jan 20th.

blessings, Sheila