Sapling

Are you going back to moderate drinking too?...I like to let other people do my research for me.

Justfor1

I was told that by a AA member about 4 months ago when I had a minor 1 day drinking incident. It didn't help me too much though. I'm glad it helps you.

TheEnd

Hell NO!!!! Alcohol and drugs have no place in my life. Don't want it and don't need it.

LoveMeNow

Why aren't you playing softball today? lol

Sorry about your friend!

LoveMeNow

MI NA softball vs Melbourne NA in 2 weeks. It's gonna be a nail biter. haha

instant

Stu. Thank you for being solid when I first came here. You were one of the people who opened my eyes to what is possible. You are an essential element of the SR community. Dare I say you I regard you as one of the elder statesmen round here - just sayin'.

What has happened to your club/ friends is a tragedy and I can't begin to imagine the impact on you and those who are left. Clearly there are no winners in this battle, and it's not over yet.

My thoughts are with you.

Fandy

I'm sure that Dr. Drew and Dr. PHIL are enjoying the ratings. The chiefs of medical and surgical oncology at real hospitals that save non celebrities might disagree.

RobbyRobot

An interesting thread.

I don't care much about tags, either way. They serve a base purpose, and like anything else in life that has little meaning to me, I'm not for or against tags... they simply exist, for better or worse. Whatever. Me, I'm a recovered alcoholic drug addict. And more.

Yeah, I get the thing about those who just don't "get it." It happens. So what? Other people not "getting it" is not my business, and although I do have some opinions, my opinions don't mean much to any one else, since they have enough of their own, why should mine be more important when it comes down to how many people "don't get it?" I couldn't care any less about my own subjective opinion about other peoples business...

I agree that the process or journey of recovery can indeed turn into a kind of "welfare program" where not drinking is the most important goal and marker of success. Actually, this happens all to often, imo, and is a great justified reason to return to a life that includes the moderated use of alcohol.

The non-drinker simply decides that not drinking simply to not drink is useless, and so, of course, with no other reason to be a non-drinker, they allow for drinking. They want to be all-inclusive of their choices. They don't choose drinking, and they don't chose not drinking.... of course, as things progress, they do in fact return to moderated drinking.

Moderated drinking dosen't work. Alcohol, the drug, cannot be moderated. End of story. The free ride was never free, you know?

Being powerless is an awesome thing, to be sure. Having said that, I'm very careful what it is I agree in being powerless about. All my past trials with moderation failed because in fact I am powerless against my experiences with alcohol. I lost every single fight with alcohol I ever had. No exceptions.

Sobriety is no example of a win with my fights against alcohol. I can't beat the drug. Sobriety is an example of my win over the reasons and problems in my past life which made drinking seem like a good idea. I won against dying as a loser drunk, but i didn't ever beat alcohol...

I don't know what you mean when you say you wish more people would see that being powerless gave you even more power than you ever dreamed. I understand your words, I mean don't know why, or how, you could honestly care about what others know or don't know about being powerless when after five years of non-drinking, you give that position up because you had a half-cup of beer?

A couple of mouthfuls, and its a new life journey?

Like I said in my first post, I'm not you, and I truly respect you Stugotz, notwithstanding our differences. I don't agree you made the right choices going forward about a sans-alcohol lifestyle, but that is not up to me, so whatever. No problemo. I'm responding to the quote because your words just don't jive, you know?

There is nothing about my recovered life that is lacking or in want for me to reverse myself and have a drink. I don't drink no more no more.

Live and let live.

Later.

heathersweeds

Dear Stugotz- I am very sorry for your loss. My heart feels like it is breaking to hear you believeing the lies our addict brain trys to get us to fail in a working life. I totally understand the days I wake up and wonder what is all this program really for. Not my will a still small voice says. My journey includes doing what I can for God's people. And in doing so, I get to keep my sobriety. I have had to accept step one for the rest of my life. As far as labels, My son is autistic, but that does not define who he really is. I am an alcoholic, but I am so many other things. I just have to moniter my thinking a little more than others. I know you do work for your MC club which is big in christianity, so God will be with you, making the corrections like in all of us who believe. I cannot do anything without being smacked on the hand it seems lol! Please come check in once in awhile.

BASEjumper

Have fun, don't die.

C-ya

stugotz

@Robby-You Rock!

@Heathers-No lies goin on here.

@Basejumper-I try not to every day...

Sapling

Can I ask you an honest question stugotz.....Give me a little of that AA honesty....While I think what happened to your friends is beyond tragic....And I've sent you and their friends and families prayers for peace getting through this....I don't really understand the link with that tragedy and your deciding to move onto a different life....Like I said before...I could see it coming in your posts...That you were moving on and out. I guess my question is....What were you really looking for when you posted this thread? I'm a curious newcomer.

stugotz

First of all I dont subscribe to "a little honesty" Its all or nothing. My decision has nothing to do with the events that transpired. That sort of thing goes hand in hand with the life I live. Now onto the interesting question. Why did I post this? Im not really sure, maybe to let others know that maybe somewhere in the middle between "success" and "failure" a peaceful moral honest life can be achieved. Who knows. Maybe Im just sayin...

Sapling

Is there some small part of you that wanted to have people talk you out of it?...I don't know. I look at my sobriety like this. I was as low as I could f*cking possibly get....Mentally...physically and spiritually shot. I feel like God gave me a second chance....Gave this worthless and hopeless alcoholic a purpose in life....And for me to pick up a drink right now would be slapping Him in the face....So maybe it just confuses me....Maybe I would have just moved on quietly like my friend that helped me out in my first year in AA and went out a few months ago....Maybe it's just something I'll never understand....But nothing happens in God's world by mistake....Be good stugotz!

stugotz

I got my second chance and used it. I have nothing in common with my former self. Nothing.

redatlanta

I am new here I have not read any of your posts before. My years sober husband has been discussing with me drinking in moderation again. Alcoholism aside - It just can't happen because of his health issues. Nontheless your thread has been eye opening in how he feels. He is not the same person he was years ago when he was drinking. He wants to feel normal - and by normal he doesn't mean being drunk - he means he wants to feel the freedom of not being labeled sober or alcoholic, he doesn't want to explain - he just wants to be.

He left AA years ago for the same reasons as you have described and will always credit it with saving his life.

Thank you - as we continue to discuss this I will do so with more empathy for what he is trying to achieve.

Good luck.

Sally1009

For me there is no such thing as an alcoholic being able to try or return to moderate drinking. It is something many alcoholics believe at times, but it invariably ends in disaster.
I know for myself I can't drink normally, and I have proven it many times. Once that invisible line is crossed there is no turning back, in my view.

redatlanta

Please re-read my post. I do not support him drinking and do not agree that he would be able to again.

I simply understand he is tired of being labeled either and alcoholic or sober.

stugotz

Ok people. Im out. Be in touch soon......

Threshold

THIS is what I deeply want for myself. This is the sobriety I am striving for.