Class of August 2013 - Part 14
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Hi, all --
Just checking in. Hoping that things are going well for my classmates, wherever you are. Else, sending extra warm thoughts your way. And Oceanlady, I hope everything is cleared up after your unexpected hospital visit.
Things are all right on this end. Stressful, still, at work. Wishing things could fall into place more evenly. Two years ago, I left a job that I didn't like -- but had a boss I adored -- for my current post. Now, a job I love and a boss ... well, 'nuff said. It takes its toll from time to time. We've all been walking on eggshells for a few weeks as her "mood" continues.
Ah well. Life.
My kindest thoughts to all,
V.
Just checking in. Hoping that things are going well for my classmates, wherever you are. Else, sending extra warm thoughts your way. And Oceanlady, I hope everything is cleared up after your unexpected hospital visit.
Things are all right on this end. Stressful, still, at work. Wishing things could fall into place more evenly. Two years ago, I left a job that I didn't like -- but had a boss I adored -- for my current post. Now, a job I love and a boss ... well, 'nuff said. It takes its toll from time to time. We've all been walking on eggshells for a few weeks as her "mood" continues.
Ah well. Life.
My kindest thoughts to all,
V.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 264
Else: how amazing that your son has you to talk to! What a gift. I'm so happy that he is improving.
I hope that horse purchase went through! I would love to see a photo!
Advbike & Orn: I've never been able to moderate either! I recently quit coffee and was chatting to my sister about it, she asked if I couldn't just have one cup in the morning instead of quitting completely and I replied, "no, same reason I quit drinking, I don't moderate. I either do or I don't"
V: I'm glad you got back to the gym! You petit little lady!
I hope that horse purchase went through! I would love to see a photo!
Advbike & Orn: I've never been able to moderate either! I recently quit coffee and was chatting to my sister about it, she asked if I couldn't just have one cup in the morning instead of quitting completely and I replied, "no, same reason I quit drinking, I don't moderate. I either do or I don't"
V: I'm glad you got back to the gym! You petit little lady!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,252
Thank you all for your kind wishes. My son went home to visit his wife and daughters last weekend and everything went well and he's back at the rehab center now. He told me that some of the people he knew are going home and when the new ones come in he can see how sick they are. I think this is a good insight for now.
I'm starting to feel more hopeful. He is very smart and although I know that doesn't mean much with this disease, he does understand how much he has to lose. His wife is a lovely girl and if he loses her she'll marry again and some other man, maybe a mean man, will be raising his daughters. I know I'm getting way ahead of myself and I need to stay in the present. But my mind wanders
For the present they are still married and I know she still loves him. But trust? That's another thing. She has babies to think about now. They've been together since they were 12. I think a shared history is important. But maybe she's had enough.
As for me, I feel pretty calm. I looked at a beautiful horse yesterday. He is a real doll. He's brown with gold highlights. 15-2 with soft gentle eyes. I've never ridden such a fine horse. His mouth is so soft and he works off the leg like a dream. ( excellent things. ). And the people know what they have. He's very expensive. I've been spending money like you wouldn't believe. I had no idea how much rehab costs. $25,000.00 for this place. With medical care and follow up. I pray every day he'll find a good psychiatrist when he gets done at the center. He needs help with acute anxiety. That seems to be the thing that sets him off on his binges. He runs 30 miles a week to try and handle it but it gets away from him and then he's off on a binge. He can't stop until he's so bad he has to go to the ER. His poor wife would sit there holding a baby and pregnant with another one......And I take back everything I ever said about AA. The rehab center uses the AA model. Since he lives in San Francisco I am sure he can find a good meeting where he can relate to the people. I hope so. I gave him info about Sober Recovery and told him how much it's helped me. I told him to find Dee.
Well that's my story for today. Bob just told me he'd buy me the horse for my birthday if I really want him so I'm going to ride him a few more times. I'm so lucky to have such a wonderful husband. He hasn't said one word about the 25,000 dollars and my son isn't even his.
Love to you all!
I'm starting to feel more hopeful. He is very smart and although I know that doesn't mean much with this disease, he does understand how much he has to lose. His wife is a lovely girl and if he loses her she'll marry again and some other man, maybe a mean man, will be raising his daughters. I know I'm getting way ahead of myself and I need to stay in the present. But my mind wanders
For the present they are still married and I know she still loves him. But trust? That's another thing. She has babies to think about now. They've been together since they were 12. I think a shared history is important. But maybe she's had enough.
As for me, I feel pretty calm. I looked at a beautiful horse yesterday. He is a real doll. He's brown with gold highlights. 15-2 with soft gentle eyes. I've never ridden such a fine horse. His mouth is so soft and he works off the leg like a dream. ( excellent things. ). And the people know what they have. He's very expensive. I've been spending money like you wouldn't believe. I had no idea how much rehab costs. $25,000.00 for this place. With medical care and follow up. I pray every day he'll find a good psychiatrist when he gets done at the center. He needs help with acute anxiety. That seems to be the thing that sets him off on his binges. He runs 30 miles a week to try and handle it but it gets away from him and then he's off on a binge. He can't stop until he's so bad he has to go to the ER. His poor wife would sit there holding a baby and pregnant with another one......And I take back everything I ever said about AA. The rehab center uses the AA model. Since he lives in San Francisco I am sure he can find a good meeting where he can relate to the people. I hope so. I gave him info about Sober Recovery and told him how much it's helped me. I told him to find Dee.
Well that's my story for today. Bob just told me he'd buy me the horse for my birthday if I really want him so I'm going to ride him a few more times. I'm so lucky to have such a wonderful husband. He hasn't said one word about the 25,000 dollars and my son isn't even his.
Love to you all!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 728
Hi everyone! Doing very well here! Thanks for all your good wishes. Much easier this year than last...tonight I had a a frozen lemonaid,,very tasty ! So grateful for the peacefulness that is growing in me!
Temp here in 80s!
The other night I was out with a group of non drinkers...we seem to have found each other! My one drinking friend felt strange ordering wine so had a coke! What a reversal of roles!
Temp here in 80s!
The other night I was out with a group of non drinkers...we seem to have found each other! My one drinking friend felt strange ordering wine so had a coke! What a reversal of roles!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Hi, all --
Ugh. It's been snowing steadily here since mid-afternoon. We're supposed to get about six inches, though the forecast is that it'll disappear rather quickly.
Good to see the updates. Else, it sounds like your son is making progress. A long road ahead, I know.
May we all have a peaceful, healthy and sober week.
Best,
V.
Ugh. It's been snowing steadily here since mid-afternoon. We're supposed to get about six inches, though the forecast is that it'll disappear rather quickly.
Good to see the updates. Else, it sounds like your son is making progress. A long road ahead, I know.
May we all have a peaceful, healthy and sober week.
Best,
V.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,252
I spoke to my boy ( grown man and father ) this morning. He sounds better than I have heard him in a long, long time. To tell the truth, it sounds like he almost enjoyed rehab. Maybe it gave him a chance to just let it all out. He sounds so relieved. He gets out tomorrow and has arranged for counseling for his alcoholism and counseling for him and his wife. He's already found an AA group near his home. I can't help but feel encouraged although I know from experience that this is when some of the hard part starts. Seems like I felt really well for two or three months and then fell into that depression. Since he's my son he may follow my footsteps. I know I have to let him find his own way but I'm hoping his meetings and the support he has set up will see him through. I, of course, will be watching carefully with high hopes. If I see depression creeping up, well, it will be hard not to fret myself into a tizzy. I have to be careful with myself, too. I'm not forgetting that.
I have an older friend and when I told her what was happening in my life, she put her arms around me and prayed a sweet honest prayer. I don't think I've felt so warmly comforted since I was a little tiny kid. It was humbling. I'm thinking I could use a little humility in my life. Me. The one who wouldn't go to NA. Wouldn't believe in a higher power. Insisted on taking this on all alone. OMG what if I had to look somebody in the eye and say I was a dug addict? Out loud. Well, I did that and I'm still alive. Life just keeps coming at me with the lessons.
Today I was listening to the radio and this song by Carrie Underwood came on about Jesus taking the wheel. It made me weep and I immediately got on iTunes and downloaded it. It is a touching song for someone who is so intense and tied up in themselves all the time. Just what I needed today.
Thanks everybody! Love to you all. Hope spring is coming your way.
I have an older friend and when I told her what was happening in my life, she put her arms around me and prayed a sweet honest prayer. I don't think I've felt so warmly comforted since I was a little tiny kid. It was humbling. I'm thinking I could use a little humility in my life. Me. The one who wouldn't go to NA. Wouldn't believe in a higher power. Insisted on taking this on all alone. OMG what if I had to look somebody in the eye and say I was a dug addict? Out loud. Well, I did that and I'm still alive. Life just keeps coming at me with the lessons.
Today I was listening to the radio and this song by Carrie Underwood came on about Jesus taking the wheel. It made me weep and I immediately got on iTunes and downloaded it. It is a touching song for someone who is so intense and tied up in themselves all the time. Just what I needed today.
Thanks everybody! Love to you all. Hope spring is coming your way.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,252
I am having a bad night of insomnia. So I turn to you. A storm is blowing in and my wind chimes are clanging. The mountains will get some snow. Maybe half the state won't burn down this summer.
My son is doing well as of this day. He cut off his dreadlocks (San Francisco, you know, and he does have very curly hair)) and has lost the puffy look of alcoholics. He looks handsome and fit because most weeks he runs 30 miles. He does this to help with his acute anxiety. He is a binge drinker but this time, as you know, we feared for his life. He goes back to work on Monday. My fingers are all crossed and I'm praying hard. When I go back down there I will go to a meeting with him.
Today I scrubbed my whole house and tended my plants and i should be tired. But wide awake it is.
No luck on the horse front, although there is a palomino out there. But I don't look forward to another wild horse. I want a nice quiet horse that comes already trained with no bad habits or meanness. But I'm going to try him out. He is a horse my brother rides but he hasn't been ridden in a while and my brother is a daredevil rider. He may have taught the horse some bad manners.
Sorry to be rambling on this way. I'm really ok and have been thinking about our class coming on to two years the end of this summer. We have done a good thing for ourselves. Sometimes I wonder about FG and JD and try to send them good thoughts.
Oh, one more thing. My ex-husband, who is my sons father, and I had a good long talk while I was down there. Cleared the air about some awful hurt feelings that came along with our divorce. I think a divorce brings out the worst in people. It was a great weight lifted off my shoulders to do this. Our divorce was not pretty. We came together to help our son and helped ourselves along the way. This is a blessing and damn near a miracle. I know he feels better about it all, too.
Good night to you all. It's 2:00 AM here. Thanks for being here.
My son is doing well as of this day. He cut off his dreadlocks (San Francisco, you know, and he does have very curly hair)) and has lost the puffy look of alcoholics. He looks handsome and fit because most weeks he runs 30 miles. He does this to help with his acute anxiety. He is a binge drinker but this time, as you know, we feared for his life. He goes back to work on Monday. My fingers are all crossed and I'm praying hard. When I go back down there I will go to a meeting with him.
Today I scrubbed my whole house and tended my plants and i should be tired. But wide awake it is.
No luck on the horse front, although there is a palomino out there. But I don't look forward to another wild horse. I want a nice quiet horse that comes already trained with no bad habits or meanness. But I'm going to try him out. He is a horse my brother rides but he hasn't been ridden in a while and my brother is a daredevil rider. He may have taught the horse some bad manners.
Sorry to be rambling on this way. I'm really ok and have been thinking about our class coming on to two years the end of this summer. We have done a good thing for ourselves. Sometimes I wonder about FG and JD and try to send them good thoughts.
Oh, one more thing. My ex-husband, who is my sons father, and I had a good long talk while I was down there. Cleared the air about some awful hurt feelings that came along with our divorce. I think a divorce brings out the worst in people. It was a great weight lifted off my shoulders to do this. Our divorce was not pretty. We came together to help our son and helped ourselves along the way. This is a blessing and damn near a miracle. I know he feels better about it all, too.
Good night to you all. It's 2:00 AM here. Thanks for being here.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 264
Hey else! I'm so glad your son is feeling better. My thoughts are with you and him, sending lots of positove thoughts your way!
Often times the best things are born from our darkest moments, happy to hear about the healing talk with your ex.
Often times the best things are born from our darkest moments, happy to hear about the healing talk with your ex.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Hi, all,
Hope this note finds that the weekend has been good to all of us.
Else, I continue to keep you and your son in my thoughts. I wish I had some sage advice re: you insomnia. It is something I've dealt with on and off all my life, pre-drinking, pre-alcoholism, used booze as a crutch during alcoholism, and have still had sleep issues well past the year and a half mark. I was glad to hear that this has brought you some much-needed resolution with your former husband, having recalled your comments about the acrimony during and after the end of your marriage. Take care, lovely lady, and know that you've got people supporting you here.
How is everyone else doing? My New Orleans obsession continues; I just finished all four seasons of HBO's "Treme" on Amazon and recommend it highly. The stories are powerful and the characters are complex. One thing I liked about it is that -- unlike "The Sopranos" or "Breaking Bad" -- the characters are all inherently decent and facing a variety of challenges in life after Katrina.
I cannot remember if I mentioned this but I am headed back to New Orleans in May, joined by my mother and sister-in-law. My cousin and her husband are hosting a family gathering there and I'm really looking forward to those events as well as heading out and showing my family a little more of NO and hitting some music spots with my cousins.
The other news: I've started seeing a nice man here in my neck of the woods. We met online. It's certainly fair to say we're taking things slowly. There haven't been a ton of opportunities for us to spend time together -- his teen-age daughter moved in with him right when we met. Custody is now 50/50 and there are, as you might imagine when developments like that occur, some "issues" going on there, though things seem more stable now. I like him. We'll see where things go.
May we all have a peaceful, healthy and sober week ahead.
V.
Hope this note finds that the weekend has been good to all of us.
Else, I continue to keep you and your son in my thoughts. I wish I had some sage advice re: you insomnia. It is something I've dealt with on and off all my life, pre-drinking, pre-alcoholism, used booze as a crutch during alcoholism, and have still had sleep issues well past the year and a half mark. I was glad to hear that this has brought you some much-needed resolution with your former husband, having recalled your comments about the acrimony during and after the end of your marriage. Take care, lovely lady, and know that you've got people supporting you here.
How is everyone else doing? My New Orleans obsession continues; I just finished all four seasons of HBO's "Treme" on Amazon and recommend it highly. The stories are powerful and the characters are complex. One thing I liked about it is that -- unlike "The Sopranos" or "Breaking Bad" -- the characters are all inherently decent and facing a variety of challenges in life after Katrina.
I cannot remember if I mentioned this but I am headed back to New Orleans in May, joined by my mother and sister-in-law. My cousin and her husband are hosting a family gathering there and I'm really looking forward to those events as well as heading out and showing my family a little more of NO and hitting some music spots with my cousins.
The other news: I've started seeing a nice man here in my neck of the woods. We met online. It's certainly fair to say we're taking things slowly. There haven't been a ton of opportunities for us to spend time together -- his teen-age daughter moved in with him right when we met. Custody is now 50/50 and there are, as you might imagine when developments like that occur, some "issues" going on there, though things seem more stable now. I like him. We'll see where things go.
May we all have a peaceful, healthy and sober week ahead.
V.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,252
Hi Venecia, thanks for the good wishes. Things are going well on this day. My son goes back to work and life goes on. I'm doing good. Slept last night. Ahhhhh!
Thanks for the advice on the show "Treme". I will look for that. My husband and I have been looking for something to watch. That sounds good. Sounds like you're finding some copacetic-ness (couldn't think of another word) with New Orleans. I kind of feel that way about San Francisco. It's an interesting city, also, with many distinct neighborhoods and I go down there a lot. To me it's always been "The City".
And a new man friend. I'm so happy for you. I feel very lucky to have such a fine husband at my age. It means a lot to me to have him. He certainly is the love of my life. Your friends' daughter won't be there for ever. Soon she'll be off on a life of her own and for now it's probably nice to take things slow. Jumping into things fast can sometimes lead to broken hearts although I'm one to talk. That's another story.
I went out there and grabbed that tall Palomino horse I was talking about a day or two ago and rode him. He was a perfect gentleman! He's so big (tall) he feels like riding an ocean liner. He take big long strides. But it was nice to ride a horse again. It's been a long time. I was actually a little nervous and my muscles were all quivers. I've changed so much. It's disconcerting really. I wonder if any of you feel like that? I don't feel strong anymore. I cry easily. Over big things and silly things on Facebook. So not the old me. I've lost my old verve.
And I swear, I'm going to have dreadlocks myself here pretty soon if I don't do something. This sort of bothers me. Looking my best was always a top priority with me. But I still walk, take care of my teeth and use sunscreen. That'll have to do for now. I'm gradually making peace with the new me. Not always, of course, but trying. It's when I try to get all cleaned up to go out that I feel, well, not pretty.
Well anyway, hope you're all living your lives with grace and a bit of peace.
Orn, how is the running going? Have not heard about you in a while. Are your knees and all holding up?
Oceanlady o' the beach, how are you?
Sheknits, I think of you often. Kids and nursing. Boy, can I relate!
Dee, I hope you run into my son. He could so use your wisdom.
Soberwolf, I'd love to hear more about you. I love your screen name.
And love you all.
Thanks for the advice on the show "Treme". I will look for that. My husband and I have been looking for something to watch. That sounds good. Sounds like you're finding some copacetic-ness (couldn't think of another word) with New Orleans. I kind of feel that way about San Francisco. It's an interesting city, also, with many distinct neighborhoods and I go down there a lot. To me it's always been "The City".
And a new man friend. I'm so happy for you. I feel very lucky to have such a fine husband at my age. It means a lot to me to have him. He certainly is the love of my life. Your friends' daughter won't be there for ever. Soon she'll be off on a life of her own and for now it's probably nice to take things slow. Jumping into things fast can sometimes lead to broken hearts although I'm one to talk. That's another story.
I went out there and grabbed that tall Palomino horse I was talking about a day or two ago and rode him. He was a perfect gentleman! He's so big (tall) he feels like riding an ocean liner. He take big long strides. But it was nice to ride a horse again. It's been a long time. I was actually a little nervous and my muscles were all quivers. I've changed so much. It's disconcerting really. I wonder if any of you feel like that? I don't feel strong anymore. I cry easily. Over big things and silly things on Facebook. So not the old me. I've lost my old verve.
And I swear, I'm going to have dreadlocks myself here pretty soon if I don't do something. This sort of bothers me. Looking my best was always a top priority with me. But I still walk, take care of my teeth and use sunscreen. That'll have to do for now. I'm gradually making peace with the new me. Not always, of course, but trying. It's when I try to get all cleaned up to go out that I feel, well, not pretty.
Well anyway, hope you're all living your lives with grace and a bit of peace.
Orn, how is the running going? Have not heard about you in a while. Are your knees and all holding up?
Oceanlady o' the beach, how are you?
Sheknits, I think of you often. Kids and nursing. Boy, can I relate!
Dee, I hope you run into my son. He could so use your wisdom.
Soberwolf, I'd love to hear more about you. I love your screen name.
And love you all.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,252
Adv! Are you back this way again? It sure is beautiful here right now. Everything is as green as it ever gets here. It's in the 60's with the crisp mountain air.....
I was just thinking about you and how the Bull Creek fire got so close to both our houses last year. I think I remeber something about you coming back from the Far East for a while to get some things in order. How are you? I'd sure like to see a long post from you. I think you're becoming one of those wise ones Dee was mentioning.
Send us an update soon!
I was just thinking about you and how the Bull Creek fire got so close to both our houses last year. I think I remeber something about you coming back from the Far East for a while to get some things in order. How are you? I'd sure like to see a long post from you. I think you're becoming one of those wise ones Dee was mentioning.
Send us an update soon!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Eastern Shore of Maryland
Posts: 486
Originally Posted by Elseware 
Orn, how is the running going? Have not heard about you in a while. Are your knees and all holding up?
No injuries and knees are fine. I think losing weight and strengthening my leg muscles are the best things I could have done for my knees.
Running has become that thing I couldn't do when I was drinking. It raises my self-esteem and reminds me why I don't drink. My relationship with my wife is so different now too and is also a daily reminder of how much better my life has become.
Horse shopping sounds fun. I hope you find the right match. I hope you son continues on his journey as well.
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