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Spectacular Connections Check-in Part II

Old 12-22-2008, 05:52 PM
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Hi mongo....glad you checked in

I'm trying real hard to get to a good space with the holiday season....let us know anything you think of that helps you get through the holiday/family stuff....I sure could use ideas to keep in mind

Can't believe it seems so overwhelming when I'm only going for 24 hours ... maybe i'm making too big a deal out of it
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Old 12-22-2008, 08:09 PM
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Originally Posted by Brightening View Post
Ummm...I'm thinking this probably my spot. Not that the other forums aren't helpful, and all.
Welcome Brightening. Secular recovery rocks!
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Old 12-22-2008, 08:28 PM
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Good to see ya, Ron!
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Old 12-22-2008, 09:38 PM
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Welcome back, Ron! And hello Brightening.

Hi to everyone else...Paul, Ananda, Alera, Zen(s), Bugs and anyone I miss.

I love the secular basement, but admit it's been fun posting all over the place.

Ananda, I love your, "Hi, I'm Ananda and I'm godless." Maybe we can talk on the phone sometime. I think it's be a hoot.

Can you still see the top of your trailer from the snow fortress, Paul? Love the pics.

However you spend this holiday, or even if you don't, my best wishes and hugs go out to you all.

The days are getting longer minute by minute now. Woo-Hoo!

Donna
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Old 12-23-2008, 12:54 AM
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Originally Posted by ananda View Post
Can't believe it seems so overwhelming when I'm only going for 24 hours ... maybe i'm making too big a deal out of it


Hello, ananda. How are you doing? Maybe you could do something special for yourself. Have an ananda appreciation day. Why not? Maybe that's a special meal, shopping, crafting something, writing a song...I don't know. What do you want to do?
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Old 12-23-2008, 12:56 AM
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For me, life is annoying. I'm having a hard time finding meaning and purpose in my own life. I believe that there is no inherent point to life...it's up to the individual to decide what to make of it...but I'm drawing a blank at the moment. I'm hoping this is a temporary state (...it's already lasted far too long).

On the plus side fear is keeping me sober. It's practically killed any cravings. What scares me though is when the fear wears off.
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Old 12-23-2008, 04:58 AM
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bam,

I'll tell you how i see that....I believe that we put the form on our lifes. One of the big blessings of being born as a human being is taht we get to create/choose the form of the life we live. We get to put the meaning into our lives and the lives of others.

In buddhism there is a sutra and I'm not good at this stuff so i'm sure someone will correct me...but "form is emptyness and emptiness is form"...That to me is what you just talked about.

When I was 1 year sober the first time (and not a buddhist) a buddhist in our home group said to me when I was desloate abotu the no meaning thing.....

"my teacher said understanding emptiness is a good thing...just dont stay thier too long"....

Probably makes no since...but helped me to rember that and share...thx
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Old 12-23-2008, 05:06 AM
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Hmmm...meaning and purpose. I can't speak for everyone, but I know that the things I consider "meaningful" or my "purpose" are not intrinsic, as you said. They came from my decisions to learn. You can't be of use to anyone, any hobby, or any field without learning and putting in the time. There are many things I've dabbled in that didn't pan out, thus, they are not a purpose for me. But other things that I never thought I would be accomplishing or even interested in back in my childhood became big parts of my life and now they give it "meaning". Even though I've shown an interest in many things, it seems that life sort of takes over and gives some of those interests purpose as time goes on.

I think it's a little easier for people with children to identify at least one purpose for their lives that falls outside of just "living". They are, of course, "there" for their kids. Same could be said of pets or aging parents. But it seems to me that there needs to be more...you need to find a way to be interesting to yourself and please number one at least some of the time. Eventually you have to replace the fear with something else. At first its activities (to keep off the drink), activities turn into interests which turn into priorities which turn into pride.

My personal reasons for being (and being "better", not just with alcohol, but in all aspects):

Be a better artist all the time, and bring others joy through seeing and wearing it.

Be a good and naughty wife and woman in general.

Learn as much as possible, keep an open mind, and travel so that I don't die an ignoramus.

Give back to my family the love they have shown to me, and keep my relationships with them strong.

To eat excellent food and cook it too.

Handle, breeding, raise, and show Silken Windhounds. (out of left field but its true, in the process of beginning this journey)

Continue my work with the rehoming of racing greyhounds and helping with charity events. (I do this whenever possible, it takes so much focus off the "me, me, me" and redirects it toward, egads, a purpose)

Help my husband with HIS purposes.

By way of an example:

I've always been involved in dogs and fostered a greyhound in high school. Last year I got my "forever girl" Audrey, and became involved with the rescue/charity group I obtained her through. Recently, through one of my contacts there, I learned that a Silken breeder (very rare, only 2 in my whole region) lived about 15 minutes away. I went to visit with her and am attending a luncheon with other breeders on the 27th. I'm currently doing a painting for this group (uses my current abilities in the pursuit of new ones) to use on T-shirts, and will be doing art for greyhound rescue as well. Turns out one of these people is getting on in years and may be looking for a protege to handle dogs, etc. So I basically took a first faltering step by going to just one charity event, and now I'm doing stuff all the time, and growing as I go. Life sort of found a way to make it all work out, one step at a time, and its so exciting.

I'm interested to hear what others have to say about their life's meaning.
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Old 12-23-2008, 06:16 AM
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Cool...another artist (Brightening).

Right now I have artist's block, and it's always directly related to my mood. I still haven't been able to figure out what to do about that. This should be the best time to make work...how do I find a way to let go to express myself in my work? I think too much and I don't make any progress. I'm mad at myself for this. I haven't been motivated to do much of anything lately...
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Old 12-23-2008, 08:18 AM
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Well, I'm a tattoo artist so I'm "forced" to work even if I don't feel like it that day, appointments and all. One you get started you will feel better and sometimes breakthroughs happen at the strangest times. I have to work through the block all the time otherwise things would just pile up. Some things that might help a manual or digital artist (things I do when I know I should be working but don't have an appointment):

1. Don't think about what you want to draw, paint, sculpt, etc. Just emulate something you find interesting or beautiful. You never even have to finish it.

2. Make something "for" a friend, sister, etc...even if you never end up giving to them, its a good place to start.

3. After several false starts, take a walk, read a chapter, or make a phone call, then start again.

4. Take photos to use as artistic fodder. Less frustrating on an "off" day, but still helps the work.

5. Have at least 3 ongoing projects available in case boredom sets in, or you have trouble looking at the same piece all day.

6. Depending on what you do, bring a sketch book to an outdoor coffee shop, park, or family home weather-permitting. A change of scene helps the inspirado.

What sort of art do you make? I know that personally my best stuff used to come out of sadness and other negativity, but now that I work through the block more effectively I can express myself in a more positive manner. Part of my habitual drinking was definitely related to the fact that my schedule differs so drastically from others (being able to wake up late and nurse a hangover before work). Now I've got more energy to do what I love.
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Old 12-23-2008, 01:52 PM
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I'm a printmaker without a press right now. I love printmaking...it's all about the process. ...Building up layers of ink to make more saturated colors, drawing with ink (figures and sometimes various skeletal objects) making mistakes and problem solving...I miss working in a shop.

Not having a press makes it tough to do. I would like to save up some money to buy a cheap one, but I haven't been able to do that yet. I foresee having a couple of bills from the hospital.

I need to make myself paint and draw. I know that sounds bad--I shouldn't have to make myself do something that's interesting--but drawing and painting just isn't the same as pulling a print. I need to clean up my room really well and clear a space (again!) so that I can get some work done. When I get depressed/upset, my living space goes to crap and I don't get anything accomplished. I need to find a way through this...otherwise, no work gets done. I'm neglecting my real job.
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Old 12-24-2008, 06:53 PM
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I'm so glad today is going well for me. Sure, I had to work earlier today, but when I got home things got a lot better.

This time of the year is surreal--everyone close to me is perfect. I know the good feelings won't last (for me and for others), but I can enjoy it now. Once everyone gets back into routine, it'll go to crap.

I wish I could bottle this up for a later time...when I really need it.
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Old 12-24-2008, 06:54 PM
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I mean bottle up the good feelings...not booze :P.
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Old 12-25-2008, 02:16 PM
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My car is broke down 25 miles away...

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Old 12-25-2008, 02:47 PM
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What happened?
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Old 12-25-2008, 02:50 PM
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I'm not sure... I stopped to get gas, pulled away and it died. Started it again and it starting popping and kept dying. When I finally gave up and went to shut her down, the lights wouldn't go off, even though they were turned off and the keys were out of the ignition. Had to pull a fuse under the hood to get them to go off. I don't have a clue...
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Old 12-25-2008, 02:52 PM
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You got home okay?
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Old 12-25-2008, 02:52 PM
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That sucks big time.

Indeed!

How dare these inconveniences happen on this or any other day, I ask you?

Good luck getting your baby home, Paul.
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Old 12-25-2008, 02:54 PM
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Yeah, my brother came and got us and the dogs.. it was cold and snowing.. had to leave my car... we stayed the night at my moms, and my moms bf gave us a ride home this afternoon. I hate not having my car...
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Old 12-25-2008, 03:19 PM
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You still have us DK (hug)
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