Newcomers Weekender Aug 19th - Part 1
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,474
.
Hey Quincy ~
Glad to see you found us!
One way to cook a Lobster is to put it in a Pot of cold Water. Then, turn up the Heat. The Lobster isn't even aware he's being cooked, or so the Story goes.
An early phase of this is what just happened to you re: a Friend ducking out of your Life. It's part of the Early Warning System that Alcohol use inadvertently provides via us losing Friends and Relationships. The further 'Cooking' of your Life in a downward trajectory can reasonably be expected, because that's inevitably what happens. The Good News: you alone can stop this degradation of Life Quality here & now. That's not to say you should do it alone. Only that the decision is your's alone to make, and execute.
The A-R_ness and Perfectionism endemic to many of us Alks causes us to erect this yuge barrier to quitting, and to put The Quit Decision beyond reach of mere Mortals. Consider altering just one bit of your Life first, and then tackle other issues. Your initial Plan above sounds great in this regard. For me, and for many others, just making it through that first Week Sober got me feeling better pretty quickly. BTW, a proverbial Ton of problems resolve on their own once you quit the Self-Poisoning via Ethanol.
There's Resources here on SR re: making your own Plan, and the price is right: free. I'm in the Camp that sees the internal decision to quit as the most critical component. Plans - as valuable as they are - still exist outside yourself. They don't necessarily reach the Core of that critical Quit Decision. Job 1: Quit picking up no matter what. Job 2: As with Exercise, you got to do what you enjoy to keep at it. A corollary to that is you've got to settle into a Recovery Plan that suits you. Pick and customize a Recovery Plan that, like continuing Exercise, works for you, and only you.
A Shout Out here to Julia, and the other new Bus Fare_ies! Jump right in. The Water's fine!
I'm proud to be a Zero! 0.0 BAC, that is...
.
Hey Quincy ~
Glad to see you found us!
One way to cook a Lobster is to put it in a Pot of cold Water. Then, turn up the Heat. The Lobster isn't even aware he's being cooked, or so the Story goes.
An early phase of this is what just happened to you re: a Friend ducking out of your Life. It's part of the Early Warning System that Alcohol use inadvertently provides via us losing Friends and Relationships. The further 'Cooking' of your Life in a downward trajectory can reasonably be expected, because that's inevitably what happens. The Good News: you alone can stop this degradation of Life Quality here & now. That's not to say you should do it alone. Only that the decision is your's alone to make, and execute.
The A-R_ness and Perfectionism endemic to many of us Alks causes us to erect this yuge barrier to quitting, and to put The Quit Decision beyond reach of mere Mortals. Consider altering just one bit of your Life first, and then tackle other issues. Your initial Plan above sounds great in this regard. For me, and for many others, just making it through that first Week Sober got me feeling better pretty quickly. BTW, a proverbial Ton of problems resolve on their own once you quit the Self-Poisoning via Ethanol.
There's Resources here on SR re: making your own Plan, and the price is right: free. I'm in the Camp that sees the internal decision to quit as the most critical component. Plans - as valuable as they are - still exist outside yourself. They don't necessarily reach the Core of that critical Quit Decision. Job 1: Quit picking up no matter what. Job 2: As with Exercise, you got to do what you enjoy to keep at it. A corollary to that is you've got to settle into a Recovery Plan that suits you. Pick and customize a Recovery Plan that, like continuing Exercise, works for you, and only you.
A Shout Out here to Julia, and the other new Bus Fare_ies! Jump right in. The Water's fine!
I'm proud to be a Zero! 0.0 BAC, that is...
.
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Originally Posted by Quincy 
Hi Everyone. I'm new and this will be my first weekend in years that I am going to try and not drink. I do not want to. I want to make it through the weekend and actually go to work on Monday not feeling hungover, ashamed, shaky, sweaty, etc., etc.
I'm planning on making plans with family who are very concerned about me and (luckily) still here to help as long as I'm sober. I also plan on going to an AA meeting or two. Another big goal will be to continue with my getting physically healthy with hydrating, eating well and exercise and rest because I am still feeling the effects physically from last weekend and haven't been sleeping well this week.
Part of the reason I haven't been sleeping well is a great person in my life told me last weekend we can no longer be friends because of my drinking. I feel so guilty because she is a great person. However, I respect she was no longer willing to ride my roller coaster.
Any advice and support would greatly appreciated.
I'm planning on making plans with family who are very concerned about me and (luckily) still here to help as long as I'm sober. I also plan on going to an AA meeting or two. Another big goal will be to continue with my getting physically healthy with hydrating, eating well and exercise and rest because I am still feeling the effects physically from last weekend and haven't been sleeping well this week.
Part of the reason I haven't been sleeping well is a great person in my life told me last weekend we can no longer be friends because of my drinking. I feel so guilty because she is a great person. However, I respect she was no longer willing to ride my roller coaster.
Any advice and support would greatly appreciated.
I don't know any alcoholic or anyone that abuses alcohol has not felt the sting of loss. It comes in many forms. I have lost a dear friend due to my antics. That hurt and I understand the shame and pain. It makes it real. But I used that as one more thing in my head to tip the scale in my favor.
Staying sober is never an act we do for others. It's only ever something we do for ourselves. You will probably hear at some point how this is an inside job.
Stay sober this weekend for yourself. Show yourself that you can. We will be here to support you through it. Then as you gain confidence in your ability to self care maybe your friend will reconsider. But no matter what. YOU first. Sobriety FIRST.
Hope you feel better and be very happy you have support from folks at your home that care. Many don't have that. Me included.
Hope you stick around!
Ken
A simple guy making his way
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Maine
Posts: 7,867
Originally Posted by Julia8
I want on the bus! I am new and the best thing for me now is to be around and hear successes! Hi, everyone!
What are the sober plans this weekend?
K
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
I got an early start outside ... and realized I need to make 'lunch' today, pulled a few carrots, string beans and peppers, and why not add some kale to the stir fry today...
PL, my landscape project was a tiered garden structure and surrounding area as a garden, place to relax and enjoy... it's hard to describe, the yard was one big slope... but it's finally coming together - close to completion after 15 years and the last ten doing nothing to it... I'd start in the morning and by early afternoon I was a case of beer into it... nap time and leave the tools out in the rain etc... sometimes for days...
I was posting pics of progress, but the group is already tired of it I'm sure... I should add pics to my profile page soon... what I got done in about a month would have taken me six when I was chain drinking beer...
here's lunch Marty: pork tenderloin, shrimp, broccoli and the aforementioned stuff from the garden... + royal blend rice mix...
enjoy
PL, my landscape project was a tiered garden structure and surrounding area as a garden, place to relax and enjoy... it's hard to describe, the yard was one big slope... but it's finally coming together - close to completion after 15 years and the last ten doing nothing to it... I'd start in the morning and by early afternoon I was a case of beer into it... nap time and leave the tools out in the rain etc... sometimes for days...
I was posting pics of progress, but the group is already tired of it I'm sure... I should add pics to my profile page soon... what I got done in about a month would have taken me six when I was chain drinking beer...
here's lunch Marty: pork tenderloin, shrimp, broccoli and the aforementioned stuff from the garden... + royal blend rice mix...
enjoy
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Ohio
Posts: 420
Ken - I am actually on my "weekend" right now! lol - I have wed and thurs off. So this weekend I will be working. It is always easier on working days b/c i'm gone from home for like 11 hours. But, I wont have my kids, so I usually go home and drink.
My plan is to come home and have a fun snack, get on here, read some of my book that I'm reading on alcoholism, and maybe do some writing that i'm trying to do for recovery. And maybe watch a tv show and go to bed.
My plan is to come home and have a fun snack, get on here, read some of my book that I'm reading on alcoholism, and maybe do some writing that i'm trying to do for recovery. And maybe watch a tv show and go to bed.
I look young for my age.
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 932
Sorry, Mesa, but I gotta call B[aloney] S[andwich] on the whole "lobster not knowing he's being cooked" scam. What, he's just sitting in the pot thinking, "is it getting hot in here, or is it just me?"
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
Originally Posted by Julia8
I posted here earlier, but it's not showing up - nothing is, past post #20. But, I'm getting emails that people have posted. Any ideas?
ah...
click on "User CP"
under the drop down menu click "emails and passwords"
you will get a list of permission options...
I look young for my age.
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 932
Originally Posted by LBrain
you can go to your 'settings' in your profile, scroll through and search until you find 'email notifications' - turn it to 'off' or 'no' I forget now, but I was inundated with the same emails until I figured out how to turn it off...
Sorry if you knew this already. Not sure if you're new to forums or not.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,474
.
Hard to say, Counselor U75...
What say you Depose a Lobster that was almost cooked, and enter it into the Record here. Hee hee... Hey, Terminally Caucasian *me* used to go to the SoCal Beaches, and muck around all Day in the blazing Summer Sun, pre-Sunscreen. I was slowly cooking myself, but didn't notice. All in the name of trying to meet Teen Babes.
Buckle your Seatbelt, Sir. I got a lot more BS to post from that bottomless Well!
- 'Don't Worry, Baby' ~ The Beach Boys -
.
Hard to say, Counselor U75...
What say you Depose a Lobster that was almost cooked, and enter it into the Record here. Hee hee... Hey, Terminally Caucasian *me* used to go to the SoCal Beaches, and muck around all Day in the blazing Summer Sun, pre-Sunscreen. I was slowly cooking myself, but didn't notice. All in the name of trying to meet Teen Babes.
Buckle your Seatbelt, Sir. I got a lot more BS to post from that bottomless Well!
- 'Don't Worry, Baby' ~ The Beach Boys -
.
I look young for my age.
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 932
Ugh, I'm already buried in paperwork. Last thing I want is for the lobster to lawyer up and hit me with a bunch of discovery and frivolous protective motions. I'll just let him cook. And then have dinner. With a nice butter sauce.
By the way, in researching the afore-posted meme, I happened upon this unrelated page of Rodney Dangerfield quotes. LOL's abounded.
Rodney Dangerfield's Best One-Liners
By the way, in researching the afore-posted meme, I happened upon this unrelated page of Rodney Dangerfield quotes. LOL's abounded.
Rodney Dangerfield's Best One-Liners
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,067
I can see LBrain's videos on my new Mac! There is a thread about videos in the Tech section--maybe the Admin have made some changes. Now if I could just figure out why my printer prints blank pages from the Mac but works just fine from the PC...
My whole life is full of techno-challenges. I work as a hotel housekeeper, but there is a function on the hotel computer that does not work and it makes my day considerably more difficult. And there is my new truck, which has a 500-page owner's manual plus a 200-page manual for the stereo and navigation system. Then I bought a Mac laptop after using only a Windows PC for ten years, and one thing I wanted it for was so I could stay in touch with SR when I go on vacation. Even my sobriety presents techno-challenges!
My whole life is full of techno-challenges. I work as a hotel housekeeper, but there is a function on the hotel computer that does not work and it makes my day considerably more difficult. And there is my new truck, which has a 500-page owner's manual plus a 200-page manual for the stereo and navigation system. Then I bought a Mac laptop after using only a Windows PC for ten years, and one thing I wanted it for was so I could stay in touch with SR when I go on vacation. Even my sobriety presents techno-challenges!
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