Been over a year since Checking in. Still having Major Problems
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
Originally Posted by pauladmits 
Thank you guys again. Today is another bad day. It's like packing in as many days of abuse until you have to stop. I need to start right now, I'm slowly deteriorating. My memory is gone, I'm doing stupid things like opening the fridge when I want a spoon or leaving my car in drive and walking out. I can just tell my connection is not the same. I appreciate your comments, have read them all and appreciate everything. Don't know how else to put it because it truly does help. I will be hurting again tomorrow and my fight will be weak. Without driving anywhere do you have suggestions for day 1?
Call your primary care physician, make an appointment for a complete physical. ..when/if you actually go, be honest about how much you drInk and the puking.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,339
Seeing your doctor is a good first step. You've admitted to yourself and SR the depth of your problem, but it's not the same as telling a professional openly.
Your positive energy is what led me to join this forum and quit drinking about two years ago.....you helped me
Your positive energy is what led me to join this forum and quit drinking about two years ago.....you helped me
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
have you mentioned to the pysch youve been seeing the past 2 years anything about yer alcohol consumption?
IF you want to stop drinking and turn your life around, you are gonna have to use suggestions from others. you've been given a lot of great suggestions both here and in your past threads. the balls in your court. we cant do the footwork for you.
one of the greatest things I ever did was got the humility to admit my way wasn't workin for crap(surrender) and was willing to do what others had done.
sure hope ya decide to use the suggestions here. life sober is possible and awesome!
IF you want to stop drinking and turn your life around, you are gonna have to use suggestions from others. you've been given a lot of great suggestions both here and in your past threads. the balls in your court. we cant do the footwork for you.
one of the greatest things I ever did was got the humility to admit my way wasn't workin for crap(surrender) and was willing to do what others had done.
sure hope ya decide to use the suggestions here. life sober is possible and awesome!
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
Originally Posted by Marcher13
Hi Paul. You mentioned that you work at home so you can work drunk, I'm wondering what kind of work that can be that you can do it drunk. No need to answer here, I am just putting the thought out to you. I wonder if it is possible for you to go to a workplace to do your work even some of the time? Perhaps you might be in a position to rent a room somewhere to do your work? The very act of getting up, dressing and going to work (and permitting no alcohol in that space) may help.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 391
Originally Posted by Anna
How are you doing today, Paul? I hope you are getting through Day 1.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 65
hey Paul
Paul, I re-read some of your old posts, and this idea that you are "too stubborn and arrogant" keeps coming back. You say you are a functioning alcoholic. well, it is even debatable if such a thing exists, but I can tell you that based on your latest description of the quantity you drink and the effects it has on your body, you are not functioning, brother. Your body is slowly being poisoned to death and that is not a "figurative" expression. This is going to kill you. And you know it. So flush the damn bottle, stubbornness and arrogance down the drain where they belong.
You are almost certainly also wrong about that anyway. Saying you are stubborn and arrogant means that you can still claim to have some control over the situation, as in your stubbornness and arrogance are stronger than your desire to quit, so at least there is some shred of your will left, but really you are ADDICTED, plain and simple. You have to change your routine. If the money is supposedly good in your work, but you can't do it without drinking, it would be better to earn less in a place where you can't drink. You need a network of support, not that empty loneliness of what your life has become (I don't mean that as an insult, so please don't take it that way, only that you have a huge void that needs to be filled by something other than drink and quitting alone has proven to most here to be impossible and obviously hasn't worked for you either.).
I doubt the "scared straight" tactic will work, but I couldn't help but thinking of the video on youtube I found in a thread here showing the poor soul in the last throes of his alcoholism and fight against it. It is worth the time watching it. Something has to change. You need some medical attention, and fast. Please get some help before it's too late.
youtube video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dJ97Vwoup4
sr thread that it was posted in:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-too-late.html
You are almost certainly also wrong about that anyway. Saying you are stubborn and arrogant means that you can still claim to have some control over the situation, as in your stubbornness and arrogance are stronger than your desire to quit, so at least there is some shred of your will left, but really you are ADDICTED, plain and simple. You have to change your routine. If the money is supposedly good in your work, but you can't do it without drinking, it would be better to earn less in a place where you can't drink. You need a network of support, not that empty loneliness of what your life has become (I don't mean that as an insult, so please don't take it that way, only that you have a huge void that needs to be filled by something other than drink and quitting alone has proven to most here to be impossible and obviously hasn't worked for you either.).
I doubt the "scared straight" tactic will work, but I couldn't help but thinking of the video on youtube I found in a thread here showing the poor soul in the last throes of his alcoholism and fight against it. It is worth the time watching it. Something has to change. You need some medical attention, and fast. Please get some help before it's too late.
youtube video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dJ97Vwoup4
sr thread that it was posted in:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-too-late.html
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 391
I can't get myself to get help. When I'm wasted I want help, then I wake up and convince myself I have control. Without arguing about this if one person had to detox at home what would that consist of?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 391
Originally Posted by Dee74
Paul, we can't give you directions for detoxing at home.
That would go against our medical advice rule.
D
That would go against our medical advice rule.
D
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,576
I'm just scrambling right now in the head trying to find a way out of this without going anywhere.
It's really good advice you've been getting here Paul.
Not taking it is really only hurting yourself, or at the very least, putting yourself at an unecessary risk.
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Anchorage, AK
Posts: 391
Originally Posted by Dee74
As you'd remember I'm sure, I tried that and ended up stroking out at home.
It's really good advice you've been getting here Paul.
Not taking it is really only hurting yourself, or at the very least, putting yourself at an unecessary risk.
D
It's really good advice you've been getting here Paul.
Not taking it is really only hurting yourself, or at the very least, putting yourself at an unecessary risk.
D
I tried to convince myself today I can do it on my own. You guys have been right the whole time and I keep thinking I can beat the truth. Ughhhh. Well this is good news but sad to me to know I'm not strong enough to do it on my own.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,576
sad to me to know I'm not strong enough to do it on my own.
Asking for help isn't weak, its the sensible to do, Paul.
sometimes an outside perspective can really help
D
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Bucks County, PA
Posts: 56
Originally Posted by pauladmits
I never want to feel how I felt today again. I will call the detox place tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 20,458
Hope you will give us an update. Good news or not, isolating by yourself isn't going to give your any strength, but reading and posting here might help.
You are so young and can have a full promising happy sober life.
You are so young and can have a full promising happy sober life.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
