badger1172

"It's Monday - we always drink on Monday's to celebrate another week! C'mon!" That's what it said to me as soon as I opened my eyes this morning...then again, this is my first Monday in recovery...gonna be a long day.

EternalQ

"Yeah, you're happy with sobriety now, but what about that drinking dream you just had? You had to wake yourself up cause you were so panicked you'd drink in the dream. Your unconscious knows what it wants. It is inevitable."

Geez, AV, you've left me alone for so long... what'd ya think the only way in was to sneak in my dream? Is that all you got? You've got no hand, AV. I've got the upper hand now.

AnotherPaul

"You've made it almost three weeks, so you've proven you can control it. You detoxed, so the danger's over and you can obviously control the drinking or you wouldn't have made it 19 days without a single one. Now you can just drink on the weekends and stick to beer. You don't have to pound vodka every night and all day on the weekends like you used to. Just have a few beers on the weekends like everybody else, no big deal. You landed a job today, you don't even want to celebrate a little? Just a six pack of some really good beer - you'll enjoy it and you won't even be hungover."

You are a LIAR and I'm not listening. I've kicked the **** out of you for 19 days and tomorrow will be the 20th. I'm actually starting to enjoy your pathetic attempts to fight back. See ya tomorrow, jackass, I'm getting into bed sober.

PaulG47

Mine told me...the anxiety you feel "I can take it away for awhile" or the big one that has caused me to go out and drink numerous times is:

"If you had been a better father, your son could be going to a university instead of CC College...so come on now and let's go drown our sorrows..who knows maybe the girls will be there!"

rainyengland

You done a great job on going so long - have a drink on me ... Yeah right,go do one!!!

EternalQ

Outta the blue tonite the thought came: "If you had a drink it would make it all better. You could forget everything and finally relax..."

This was strange as I don't have AV thoughts anymore, hardly ever.

In my mind I quickly changed the channel to checking with HALT to explain and remedy this thought. Turns out my inner inquiry produced these results: I was very hungry, i was angry, i was lonely AND i was very tired. BINGO. Remedy one: eat something. I was also stressed, not centered and and not in the present. Remedied by some meditation.

My answer to the AV lay in my actions to remedy things. Actions speak louder then words, AV.

tomb

My addiction told me I could drink just two a day. I never could

newhope01

You're brother is an alcoholic and he seems to be fine, couldn't you as well?

adamjet

Is this a question or are you hearing voices?

newhope01

^^^ that did not make me feel better.

UHK4toolong

When I have thoughts that I can drink just today I tell myself that I'll drink tomorrow, thanks to the grace of God tomorrow never comes.

dedubya

my addiction was screaming at me today that it was ok to start. I screamed back (mentally- I dont scream)
Dude

Splash29

You can't go your whole life without drinking anyways, why bother not drinking today/at this event/at dinner.

One day at a time.

courage2

right NOW: you have to go out to mail a letter. that puts you within 100 yards of the liquor store. so it's almost like you're already there, right? inevitable. ...and your head will stop throbbing if you give in.

Applecrumble

I miss you!

Applecrumble

You're not capable of being a better person anyway.

Applecrumble

You're my best friend!

Ooo that would be nice!

(Bet it would taste pretty yucky now anyway)

courage2

what does today matter anyway?

EternalQ

I am reviving this thread for others and also to take the opportunity to say:
Be encouraged! My addictive voice hasn't said anything in a while so it does get better if you teach the AV there is no vacancy in your mind!

SIPD

Your going to fail anyway....