Buelah

Great job to the group on Squishy's thread. Sounds like you are all working together to achieve the same goal. We all go through all these same crazy stages, maybe some more than others, but we can all relate. Keep reading, keep posting, and stay strong!

UnrulyJoule

Hi! I'm a new member today, but I've been following this thread since Squishy first started it. It's Day 2 for me and I'd like to join everyone here in following the path to stay strong.

Squishyboots

Hey there Uuruly! All are welcome, so come join us. Welcome to day 2. How are you doing/handling everything? Sounds like we all had a rough weekend!

UnrulyJoule

Thanks for the welcome, Squishy! "Day 1 for the last time..." has been my continual chant of regret for too long. It's so easy to start up again after feeling better for a while. I've slowed down considerably over this year, but it's not enough to get back to my energetic, optimistic self. What's that joke....?... I don't have a drinking problem, I have a stopping problem.

Squishyboots

So here I am after an awful weekend, still feeling like I did last week. Should I feel stronger and more "bionic" at this point? I don't know. But I don't. Instead I feel pretty beaten down by of course dealing with real emotions. It is nice not having a drawn out screaming match with my husband, but its only because I won't fight back. When he just has his drink or two all is fine. But more than that the comments start to fly.

I also started back at classes today, so on top of my full time job I'm in two classes the next 8 weeks. My head is still pounding and I'm stressed. But who isn't these days right? Everybody has their issues. I just want to know when I can get my full health back again. Seems like a long road!

Squishyboots

Joule - you are so correct! Although for me I'm such a control freak, I would honestly keep my drinking between the hours of 4-9, after that I was in bed after the kids. But what kind of mom needs to have a couple of drinks just to be able to deal with her family? I know there are a ton of us out there, it just amazes me.

What do you think will be the difference this time?

UnrulyJoule

You're not alone in having a crankypants hubby, Squish. After too many drinks, my guy gets verbally nasty and tries to engage me in some inflammatory argument even when I stay calm and cool (which is sooo much easier with a sober brain.) My desire to dry out just isn't acceptable to him -- maybe he wants a partner in misery? I finally threw out all of the corkscrews to stop my own temptation. Of course, that started another argument...

Squishyboots

Well Joule - you are in the right place. I think I have more than a few friends out here that same the same thing! You should have seen my husbands face on Friday when I didn't even bring home a bottle or offer to go get one. I quietly made my children dinner and sat down to watch a movie. It was great, but I could see he was just dying. They all want to have that person to go with them down a road whether healthy or not, they hate to be alone. But I know if we both drink - game on and the fight begins. I can't have my children hear those fights anymore.

UnrulyJoule

The difference? Well, for the first time ever I'm reaching out to similar searching souls for mutual support. After reading many posts on this site, I'm equally comforted and horrified to see how many common symptoms and mind games we all share in our journey to get off of this crazy twirl-and-hurl ride.

snoopy1973

Squishy, I completely sympathize with you! I posted over the weekend that while everyone seemed to be talking about unicorns and rainbows, I am flat out pissed, cranky and want a drink. I know that sounds bad, but that is how I feel! I did have some bright moments with the kids over the past few days, so I guess I will focus on them! I always managed to get the kids to school and head to the gym for 2 hrs everyday (sometimes still a little drunk, and sometimes with a raging hangover, but always made it!) so maybe that is why I am not noticing a difference in how I feel as much as everyone else because I am already in shape? Or am I just struggling that much mentally...not sure!

And there are SOOO many other moms out there totally like us! I just ordered "Diary of an Alcoholic Housewife" and am looking at ordering "Mommy Doesn't Drink Here Anymore"...I hope this gets better...

Welcome Unruly

Squishyboots

Wow snoopy I didn't even know about those books - great idea! I took work out and used to do it at 430 am in the winter!!! It was the only time I could have time to myself. So even if I felt like crap, I worked out! Now I try to do most after work but not as often, I get to go about 3 times a week. Just not enough it seems.

How's good ole WI? I grew up there before I moved to CO when I was 18.

Keep strong - the draw to drink when the kids or hubby are out of control is a pull like no other. But we have to stay on track...

UnrulyJoule

I agree with both of you, Squishy and Snoopy, about working out making you feel better. When I was in great shape, it was easier to recover from too much party-hearty time. Since letting myself get all couch potato-y over the past 5 years, it's much harder to get back on track at the gym. I've just started plugging away at it again, though, as a healthy substitute.

Any other tips/tricks to stave off the urges? Looking forward to tomorrow's Day 3. My thanks to all of you in this thread for keeping me company today.

lockcap

Hello Carol,
I have been off and on this site for 7 months. Obviously, since I keep coming back I am drawn to SR.
I was hoping you could direct me to a newcomers recovery discussion for middle aged women on SR, who are facing similar issues as myself. I don't drink every night, but start to crave alcohol, (a 3+ glasses of wine after work) after 3-4 days of not drinking.
If I am out socially at a party, wedding, etc, I keep drinking much more...next morning, I often times cannot remember conversations at the end of the night, going home, etc..

I know this is not right and I realize that the alcohol takes over and I no longer have control. This has been going on for years and I want to stop this.
I know I am an abuser of alcohol and I want to stop
Plus, I am concerned since my father was an alcoholic, my behavoirs will only get worse.
I am hoping to find others that are in a smilar situation.
Thank you

Squishyboots

Welcome Lock - everybody here is welcome to join us and talk about their recovery. It is tough...

I'm on Day 8 and needless to say still had a tough night. My 2 yr old had nightmares all night and was up every hour on the hour. Thank goodness I hadn't drank, before I would be getting up feeling like crap and checking on him then thinking about puking. It was hard last night and I'm super tired today, but it could be way worse. I still have night sweats a bit and don't sleep as well, but that's ok.

I hope everyone did well last night!
lmgirl - snoopy? How did you do girls?

UnrulyJoule

Glad you're here with us, LockCap! I'm fairly new to this site, but I've already found plenty of support from terrific people.

Squishyboots

Good morning Joule - how are you feeling today?

JohnnyDetox

Squishy,

I'm at day 21...again.

Early recovery is painful...no getting around it. Keeping busy seems to help my mind from swirling too badly.

All the best

Squishyboots

Hi Johnny - welcome! You are at Day 21 which is amazing. Share your story with us - how do you feel?

UnrulyJoule

Morning, Squish. I'm feeling tired after not sleeping too well last night, either, but made it through to Day 3 today. How are you doing? Staying sane?

Squishyboots

Awesome - Day 3 was tough for me. I still felt awful and didn't know why! I'm glad you are pushing through. It does get better. Keep eating right and that will help. Congrats on Day 3!!!