Class of April 2018 Part 17
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Morning guys
I'm waiting on a new phone and the keys keep getting stuck on the one I'm using o I havent posted as its frustrating But am on the platform waiting for a train so going to give it a go!
Congratulations on your sober time Erratic. That is fantastic. In sorry to hear the ant abuse is making you sick though could it be that you are ingesting anything with alcohol in it or using perfume with alcohol in it? I've heard it's highly sensitive. I'm sure you and you counsellor are on it, just a thought. But I'm so proud of you. We all are. No looking back now hey!
Daisy so good to hear from you. I'm sorry to hear about Mr DB though . Hopefully he will get some help in October. I'm glad to hear all the grandkids are doing well and Loki but make sure you get some Daisy time in there. I know it's tough but you need it and you deserve it. How is your son doing?
Viper how is it going at the clinic??
Dee, how are you and how is your pain ? I hope it's much better now!
I'm ok. Up and down. Ok in myself just obviously grieving but I am dealing with it a day at a time. I'm sober I'm in AA but I'm also doing CBT work as there are aspects of AA I find very outdated but I am taking what I need and leaving the rest. I'm just kinda tailoring my own recovery to suit me. On the job front I am still at the covid testing site working for boots but the contract finishes on the 14th. I never heard back from sodexo re the same job my application still says in process however we have been informed that we are all going to be kept on with sodexo if we wish. No other details yet so I will see what they are offering. At the moment sodexo operate on bidding system which would be ideal for me. I am currently on a rotation of 4 on 4 off and if sodexo offer the same I wont stay on. So I'll hopefully know more soon.
I got an email from change grow live re my training and it is every Tuesday from 09.30 to16.30 for 7 weeks! Its quite alot but I'm gonna go for it a I think it will be good for me.
Seren is good and settling well into her new school. The guineas and bunny are all good. My dad and my siblings all seem to be doing ok all things considered. We miss our mum so much but we are pulling together as a family.
Not much else to report. Everyrhing is ticking along. My friend and I are gonna start cooking up candles next week to try and sell at christmas time. It will be fun and good to have a little hobby and if we can make money that's a bonus.
Ok my train here shortly. Have a great day and will check in soon.
Lots of love
I'm waiting on a new phone and the keys keep getting stuck on the one I'm using o I havent posted as its frustrating But am on the platform waiting for a train so going to give it a go!
Congratulations on your sober time Erratic. That is fantastic. In sorry to hear the ant abuse is making you sick though could it be that you are ingesting anything with alcohol in it or using perfume with alcohol in it? I've heard it's highly sensitive. I'm sure you and you counsellor are on it, just a thought. But I'm so proud of you. We all are. No looking back now hey!
Daisy so good to hear from you. I'm sorry to hear about Mr DB though . Hopefully he will get some help in October. I'm glad to hear all the grandkids are doing well and Loki but make sure you get some Daisy time in there. I know it's tough but you need it and you deserve it. How is your son doing?
Viper how is it going at the clinic??
Dee, how are you and how is your pain ? I hope it's much better now!
I'm ok. Up and down. Ok in myself just obviously grieving but I am dealing with it a day at a time. I'm sober I'm in AA but I'm also doing CBT work as there are aspects of AA I find very outdated but I am taking what I need and leaving the rest. I'm just kinda tailoring my own recovery to suit me. On the job front I am still at the covid testing site working for boots but the contract finishes on the 14th. I never heard back from sodexo re the same job my application still says in process however we have been informed that we are all going to be kept on with sodexo if we wish. No other details yet so I will see what they are offering. At the moment sodexo operate on bidding system which would be ideal for me. I am currently on a rotation of 4 on 4 off and if sodexo offer the same I wont stay on. So I'll hopefully know more soon.
I got an email from change grow live re my training and it is every Tuesday from 09.30 to16.30 for 7 weeks! Its quite alot but I'm gonna go for it a I think it will be good for me.
Seren is good and settling well into her new school. The guineas and bunny are all good. My dad and my siblings all seem to be doing ok all things considered. We miss our mum so much but we are pulling together as a family.
Not much else to report. Everyrhing is ticking along. My friend and I are gonna start cooking up candles next week to try and sell at christmas time. It will be fun and good to have a little hobby and if we can make money that's a bonus.
Ok my train here shortly. Have a great day and will check in soon.
Lots of love
Say cheese!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,379
great to see hear from u snitch and thanks xx im sure am going to keep sober. on the antabuse it wasnt about sick sick it was more having that 3 days of exhaustion which i ended up in bed and had temp and had spots and lost my sens of taste and some vomiting . I do hear u about alcohol in things which could make me sick, i was carefull to keep purfume only on my clothers and not touch vinager and other stuff. My taste is slowing coming back now and spots is also going. Im not as tired or anything like i was last week. Not sure what it was, but im only a week off the tablet, however i still have more if i feel i am sliding and thinking about drinking i will defo go back to taking it on short term as i know it has got me to where i am,
Really good to hear ur still sober and doing things to help your grieving x interesting that ur doing CBT xx daughter is way to do DBT in the new year. sry to hear u never heard from that other job. cool on the candle making x need to see some pics when u make some x
dam time is away from me this morning xx just got my 2nd cup of tea, so i will leave it there for now.
Just wanted to say that i miss you guys and im really glad to see ur post this morning xx day 41 for me and still working on being sober, with alot of stuff through the week i do, will go into it more when i can xxx
snitch hugs to u hun xxxx
Really good to hear ur still sober and doing things to help your grieving x interesting that ur doing CBT xx daughter is way to do DBT in the new year. sry to hear u never heard from that other job. cool on the candle making x need to see some pics when u make some x
dam time is away from me this morning xx just got my 2nd cup of tea, so i will leave it there for now.
Just wanted to say that i miss you guys and im really glad to see ur post this morning xx day 41 for me and still working on being sober, with alot of stuff through the week i do, will go into it more when i can xxx
snitch hugs to u hun xxxx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Morning. On the station waiting for my train. I only have a 3 day week as tomorrow the site is closed for some event being held there so day off and stil get paid woo hoo.
It's my birthday today. I opened a card from my dad and I got upset because it was only from dad and normally it says mum and dad 😢 anyway ... I'm ok. I talked to my mum this morning. I didnt want to go out for my birthday. I am going to have some chill out time and do sonething nice for myself. Maybe go for a massage or a facial. Maybe a pedicure. I ordered a beautiful cardigan which is my present to myself 😊 cant wait for that to arrive!! Everyrhing is ok. I have money in my bank, food in my cupboard, a warm bed to sleep in, hot water and heating. And I am sober! Usually birthdays for me would be about getting as much alcohol down my neck as possible. Ugh. Not today!
Ahh erratic you are doing amazing. I dont know why this kind of medication is not used more frequently to help alcoholics. I guess it still takes some discipline from the alcoholic to take it but look how long you have been trying and with this medication... boom! Keep going. It's so worth it..
Ok ny train due now. Got a series on netflix downloaded to watch. So glad I am bot driving at the moment with this bloody petrol crisis going on lol.
have a good day xx
It's my birthday today. I opened a card from my dad and I got upset because it was only from dad and normally it says mum and dad 😢 anyway ... I'm ok. I talked to my mum this morning. I didnt want to go out for my birthday. I am going to have some chill out time and do sonething nice for myself. Maybe go for a massage or a facial. Maybe a pedicure. I ordered a beautiful cardigan which is my present to myself 😊 cant wait for that to arrive!! Everyrhing is ok. I have money in my bank, food in my cupboard, a warm bed to sleep in, hot water and heating. And I am sober! Usually birthdays for me would be about getting as much alcohol down my neck as possible. Ugh. Not today!
Ahh erratic you are doing amazing. I dont know why this kind of medication is not used more frequently to help alcoholics. I guess it still takes some discipline from the alcoholic to take it but look how long you have been trying and with this medication... boom! Keep going. It's so worth it..
Ok ny train due now. Got a series on netflix downloaded to watch. So glad I am bot driving at the moment with this bloody petrol crisis going on lol.
have a good day xx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Cheshire. U.K
Posts: 8,003
Hi again Aprils, I need to try harder to post more often, but gosh I do struggle with juggling time but anyway I'm here now. I hope you're all okay, all's okay with me for the most part, I've been quite productive this week and have cleared out a load of stuff I don't wear or use and have taken it to the charity shop. I don't know where all the clutter comes from, but it isn't staying, lol.
I'm glad you're good and well Dee, feeling well is everything.
Erratic, hi lovely, I love your tree avatar, it's really nice. I'm glad you're feeling better now, it sounds like you've been through the mill a bit. I wonder what it was, maybe you had a virus of some sort
. 41 days is amazing and I'm so proud of you, you've had a lot to contend with over the last couple of weeks and yet you've persevered and you've cracked it.
Happy birthday Suze, I hope your day has been as good as it can be, I know that it must be a strange one for you, the first one without your mum, it's hard. I'm glad you've done some things and bought some things for you, that's good. There is no time scale on grief, all you can do is take each day as it comes. I don't think we ever stop missing them but we learn to live without them.
Well that's it from me, I'm off for a bit of a peruse, I'll be back as soon as.
Lots of love to you all xxx
I'm glad you're good and well Dee, feeling well is everything.
Erratic, hi lovely, I love your tree avatar, it's really nice. I'm glad you're feeling better now, it sounds like you've been through the mill a bit. I wonder what it was, maybe you had a virus of some sort
. 41 days is amazing and I'm so proud of you, you've had a lot to contend with over the last couple of weeks and yet you've persevered and you've cracked it.Happy birthday Suze, I hope your day has been as good as it can be, I know that it must be a strange one for you, the first one without your mum, it's hard. I'm glad you've done some things and bought some things for you, that's good. There is no time scale on grief, all you can do is take each day as it comes. I don't think we ever stop missing them but we learn to live without them.
Well that's it from me, I'm off for a bit of a peruse, I'll be back as soon as.
Lots of love to you all xxx
Say cheese!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,379
Happy belated birthday snitch xx
sry havent got much time to post and respond just now, im away to get my hair done as im treating myself x
great to see u both again x will pop back later when get chance xx
sry havent got much time to post and respond just now, im away to get my hair done as im treating myself x
great to see u both again x will pop back later when get chance xx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Cheshire. U.K
Posts: 8,003
Good morning all, I hope you're all good and well.
It's a very miserable morning here, so dark and pouring down with rain, lovely. Both Mr D.B and Owen are still sleeping, most unusual for Owen but I'm making the most of the peace and quiet and enjoying another cup of tea.
Morning Erratic, good for you going and getting your hair done, it's good to treat yourself once in a while.
I hope you all have a great Saturday.
Lots of love x
It's a very miserable morning here, so dark and pouring down with rain, lovely. Both Mr D.B and Owen are still sleeping, most unusual for Owen but I'm making the most of the peace and quiet and enjoying another cup of tea.
Morning Erratic, good for you going and getting your hair done, it's good to treat yourself once in a while.
I hope you all have a great Saturday.
Lots of love x
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Me too Dee .
I've just been on a fantastic meeting. Very powerful.
So basically what happened... I as at work. I am in a cabin with 3 other people. They were talking about drinking and going out etc etc. It sounded fun! On the way home my train was cancelled so I took the train to Brighton instead and then get a bus to Hove. Well Brighton was totally buzzing. So many people out the pubs were heaving. Everyone looked like they were having fun and enjoying themselves. And I felt so miserable. I stood at the bus stop outside the pub and my head started thinking how nice it would be to have a few drinks and let my hair down. To forget about all my worries and cares. I thought well I (sort of) controlled it the last time (relapse 2 months ago) i can do it this time. I went into the shop and bought a bottle of wine. I couldnt even wait to get it home. I opened it and started drinking it on the bus I poured it into the cup of my flask. When I got in I had another glass. But like last time I didnt really enjoy it because really, deep down, I know I am doing something so incredibly wrong. I decided to go next door to my neighbour. I took my wine and she was actually having a vodka. We ended up getting more wine and more vodka. I dont remember getting home. I came too vomiting on my bed.
Today has been tough. I have had no desire to drink. I dont think? I am trying to be really honest with myself. Maybe for a split second at one point in the day I thought of having a drink. But dismissed it. I contacted my sponsor . I got on a meeting. I spoke to an alcoholic on the phone. I listened to Joe and Charlie on yoh tube ..the doctors opinion. I read some of the big book. I joined the october class her on SR. I am going right back to basics. I had good concrete evidence last night that despite 3 years of sobriety I am still unable to take a drink without setting off the craving. Once an alcoholic always an alcoholic.
The good news is that i know what the solition is and I am ready and willing to dive back into it.
Onwards and upwàrds right?!
Night night . Very grateful to be going to bed sober tonight ❤🙏
I've just been on a fantastic meeting. Very powerful.
So basically what happened... I as at work. I am in a cabin with 3 other people. They were talking about drinking and going out etc etc. It sounded fun! On the way home my train was cancelled so I took the train to Brighton instead and then get a bus to Hove. Well Brighton was totally buzzing. So many people out the pubs were heaving. Everyone looked like they were having fun and enjoying themselves. And I felt so miserable. I stood at the bus stop outside the pub and my head started thinking how nice it would be to have a few drinks and let my hair down. To forget about all my worries and cares. I thought well I (sort of) controlled it the last time (relapse 2 months ago) i can do it this time. I went into the shop and bought a bottle of wine. I couldnt even wait to get it home. I opened it and started drinking it on the bus I poured it into the cup of my flask. When I got in I had another glass. But like last time I didnt really enjoy it because really, deep down, I know I am doing something so incredibly wrong. I decided to go next door to my neighbour. I took my wine and she was actually having a vodka. We ended up getting more wine and more vodka. I dont remember getting home. I came too vomiting on my bed.
Today has been tough. I have had no desire to drink. I dont think? I am trying to be really honest with myself. Maybe for a split second at one point in the day I thought of having a drink. But dismissed it. I contacted my sponsor . I got on a meeting. I spoke to an alcoholic on the phone. I listened to Joe and Charlie on yoh tube ..the doctors opinion. I read some of the big book. I joined the october class her on SR. I am going right back to basics. I had good concrete evidence last night that despite 3 years of sobriety I am still unable to take a drink without setting off the craving. Once an alcoholic always an alcoholic.
The good news is that i know what the solition is and I am ready and willing to dive back into it.
Onwards and upwàrds right?!
Night night . Very grateful to be going to bed sober tonight ❤🙏
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Cheshire. U.K
Posts: 8,003
Hugs Suze and a massive well done on coming straight back here and being honest about it. I know how hard that is from experience and I'm proud of you for it. You hit the nail on the head when you wrote 'despite 3 years of sobriety I am still unable to take a drink without setting off the craving.' Whether is be 3 years, 13 years, 33 years or 333 years, you are an alcoholic, same as me and we can't drink, period, that's the way it is for us and we can't change it. We have 2 choices, we either carry on killing ourselves slowly, or we accept that we can't drink alcohol ever and learn to accept it and live our lives without it. The fact that you've come right back and are owning your relapse and from what you are doing to protect yourself from alcohol shouts out loud that you really do want to stay sober. You can do this.
Love you. xxxx
Love you. xxxx
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
You've had a tough year or so - I can understand why fun looked so appealing Snitch.
the AV lies tho - It took me a long time but I finally accepted drinking is not fun for me.
Fair or not, doesn't matter - I can live the life I want - or drink- but not both.
I will never again confuse abstinence for control.
D
the AV lies tho - It took me a long time but I finally accepted drinking is not fun for me.
Fair or not, doesn't matter - I can live the life I want - or drink- but not both.
I will never again confuse abstinence for control.
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Thank you Dee and Daisy. I m so glad I have you giys and this forum and AA and my fellows in AA. Otherwise who knows where I would be right now? I certainly cannot do this alone.
I feel so grateful I have got another chance to start over. I would not recommend relapse to any alcoholic but what last night has hown me is how painful it is to drink. I had forgotten just how awful it felt. Well, I had a decent reminder!
I'm starting afresh and I feel positive and excited.
One day at a time
🙏❤
I feel so grateful I have got another chance to start over. I would not recommend relapse to any alcoholic but what last night has hown me is how painful it is to drink. I had forgotten just how awful it felt. Well, I had a decent reminder!
I'm starting afresh and I feel positive and excited.
One day at a time
🙏❤
Say cheese!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,379
morning x
sry i wasnt here for you snitch and glad u came back x everything what u said is a total learning curve for me as i know i have a long way to go and i shouldnt take it for granted and i need to work on being AF/sober constantly, i defo need something for the weekend as i find thats my trigger time. The problem is that the place i go to doesnt do anything at the weekend, so im going to have to look into something else, but saying that, if im bz all week is that i dont have any relaxing or free time, sry not explaining properly. I have a full week next week and im going to be working next weekend.so i wont have much time for release but least i wont be thinking of alcohol. sry i made this post about me there doh.
snitch im glad to hear your excited and positive about starting afresh x
daisy really good to see u again and you got some time to yourself even it just for more tea xx
hope u have good sunday all, will keep close i think today as i havent been on here for few days and i need the support from here i think and to catch up on whats happening with everyone xx
sry i wasnt here for you snitch and glad u came back x everything what u said is a total learning curve for me as i know i have a long way to go and i shouldnt take it for granted and i need to work on being AF/sober constantly, i defo need something for the weekend as i find thats my trigger time. The problem is that the place i go to doesnt do anything at the weekend, so im going to have to look into something else, but saying that, if im bz all week is that i dont have any relaxing or free time, sry not explaining properly. I have a full week next week and im going to be working next weekend.so i wont have much time for release but least i wont be thinking of alcohol. sry i made this post about me there doh.
snitch im glad to hear your excited and positive about starting afresh x
daisy really good to see u again and you got some time to yourself even it just for more tea xx
hope u have good sunday all, will keep close i think today as i havent been on here for few days and i need the support from here i think and to catch up on whats happening with everyone xx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Thanks all.
Erratic I completely understood what you were saying and it's ok to talk about your sobriety!! It's not making it about you at all ... thank you for your support and for being such a good friend 😊
day 2 done. I'm not really going to be counting days like I did the 1st time round but still, it's nice to get time between now and that last drink.
I have had a good day although I am still suffering from the aftet effects of drinking. Really tired and my body craving sugar and fat. But I'm sober and this morning I prayed, meditated, got on a meeting, shared, reached out to other ladies and this evening I took part in a step study group for women. Wow it was amazing. I am feeling a renewed passion for recovery. I know the drink doesn't work but I need, am in desperate need, of emotional sobriety because I have been a dry drunk for a long time now and it is a painful place to be. I want to live in the sunlight of the spirit and to enjoy life and not just exist. I know my mum would want that for me just as I would want it for my daughter. I've been talking to her today and it has brought me comfort. Grief and sadness are normal emotions and I will go through them but I will not allow myself to go into self pity, remorse or morbid reflection. Because that is not a good place for an alcoholic to be.
I have no desire to drink. It has already been lifted from me. And it will stay that way if I continue to grow spiritually.
Going to bed a grateful alcoholic tonight.
see you in the morning
🙏❤
Erratic I completely understood what you were saying and it's ok to talk about your sobriety!! It's not making it about you at all ... thank you for your support and for being such a good friend 😊
day 2 done. I'm not really going to be counting days like I did the 1st time round but still, it's nice to get time between now and that last drink.
I have had a good day although I am still suffering from the aftet effects of drinking. Really tired and my body craving sugar and fat. But I'm sober and this morning I prayed, meditated, got on a meeting, shared, reached out to other ladies and this evening I took part in a step study group for women. Wow it was amazing. I am feeling a renewed passion for recovery. I know the drink doesn't work but I need, am in desperate need, of emotional sobriety because I have been a dry drunk for a long time now and it is a painful place to be. I want to live in the sunlight of the spirit and to enjoy life and not just exist. I know my mum would want that for me just as I would want it for my daughter. I've been talking to her today and it has brought me comfort. Grief and sadness are normal emotions and I will go through them but I will not allow myself to go into self pity, remorse or morbid reflection. Because that is not a good place for an alcoholic to be.
I have no desire to drink. It has already been lifted from me. And it will stay that way if I continue to grow spiritually.
Going to bed a grateful alcoholic tonight.
see you in the morning
🙏❤
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Cheshire. U.K
Posts: 8,003
Hi all, I'm just doing a quick check in because it's late and I need to go to bed soon, I'm tired.
Thanks Dee, your phrase above 'I will never again confuse abstinence for control' is spot on. I'm going to write that down in my little book and read it often.
Hi again Suze, I'm so glad that you're posting. I'm grateful for this forum and you guys too because I couldn't do this on my own either, I need to be accountable and this place is my only support. Definitely one day at a time, that's the only way.
Hi Erratic and I understand what you're saying there too and I second what Suze says, it's fine to talk about your sobriety, in fact it's more than fine, it's a good thing and I hope you keep on talking about it.
I'm off now and will hopefully be here tomorrow.
Goodnight and lots of love xxx
Thanks Dee, your phrase above 'I will never again confuse abstinence for control' is spot on. I'm going to write that down in my little book and read it often.
Hi again Suze, I'm so glad that you're posting. I'm grateful for this forum and you guys too because I couldn't do this on my own either, I need to be accountable and this place is my only support. Definitely one day at a time, that's the only way.
Hi Erratic and I understand what you're saying there too and I second what Suze says, it's fine to talk about your sobriety, in fact it's more than fine, it's a good thing and I hope you keep on talking about it.
I'm off now and will hopefully be here tomorrow.
Goodnight and lots of love xxx
Say cheese!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,379
Morning u lovely people xx
Great to hear such enthusiam snitch thank you for expressing in such a way also as i find writing about how i feel hard sometimes and thanks for your friendship and support also x, i myself is still learning not to be a dry drunk, but i guess that comes with the territory of early sobriety. I am looking forward going to my meeting tomo.I have a free day again today, so im going to be catching up with all my recovery stuff. First one is defo to do my journal today and cards, i seemed to of lapsed in doing it daily due to being bz, so that will be hapopening once i finished posting here.
Daisy i cant say enough how good to have u here also when you can as i know u have such a bz time and im grateful to have your support aswell, you are doing so well from what i can in ur sobriety xx love to you xx
Thanks dee, good to see you also its wondful how you follow everyone and write what is needed xx i thank you for ur support also xx
day 44, i need to keep count as it motivates me on keeping on x
well im going to leave it there, as im going to go and do my cards and see what they say for today x
have a good day u lovely people xx
Daisy im so glad
Great to hear such enthusiam snitch thank you for expressing in such a way also as i find writing about how i feel hard sometimes and thanks for your friendship and support also x, i myself is still learning not to be a dry drunk, but i guess that comes with the territory of early sobriety. I am looking forward going to my meeting tomo.I have a free day again today, so im going to be catching up with all my recovery stuff. First one is defo to do my journal today and cards, i seemed to of lapsed in doing it daily due to being bz, so that will be hapopening once i finished posting here.
Daisy i cant say enough how good to have u here also when you can as i know u have such a bz time and im grateful to have your support aswell, you are doing so well from what i can in ur sobriety xx love to you xx
Thanks dee, good to see you also its wondful how you follow everyone and write what is needed xx i thank you for ur support also xx
day 44, i need to keep count as it motivates me on keeping on x
well im going to leave it there, as im going to go and do my cards and see what they say for today x
have a good day u lovely people xx
Daisy im so glad
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Snitch I’m sorry I wasn’t here!!! I’m so glad you’re renewed and back in recovery. Thanks for sharing that entire account. It’s a demon. I remember it. Cunning.
Erratic - From the looks of things… you’re doing fantastic!! I’m so proud of you. This is epic.
I’ll report back on my experience in CA so far. One thing I know is I’ll need to bail on that awful apartment and unfortunately ditch my roommate. Break my lease.
This is the situation: I need a sanitary, clean place without chaos to get well. I want to focus on maintaining a pristine Whole Food Plant Based diet, exercising, meditation/yoga, hiking and nature, and use the energy I will gain for drawing, journaling, reading, volunteering, and gaining new skills and then a j o b .
I have to ruthlessly pursue this at the detriment of my roommate, but I need to think of #1… The Viper. She chose the place and it’s been absolute $::T. Mold, leaks, filth, roaches, sewer backups 🤮. The roommate eats like crap too, I don’t want a dirty fridge full of garbage foods Costco cases of meat (I’m Vegan). She has chaotic energy. She brought a crazy addict into the house every time the chick got kicked out of a sober house and for a full 5 weeks at one point. I was raging!! Plus the area is a criminal hotbed. The cars are in danger. Constant theft and break-ins. I’d need a gun to stay any longer. I’m trying to justify it I think, but I don’t need to.
It’s no wonder I hid in crap foods and slept all day because of the harm they cause me. Takeout Indian every night because I can’t cook in that gross kitchen, and then tons of snacks on top of it. Binging on Netflix and massive amounts of chips and cookies.
So I’ll have to find a place that I can afford.
Anyway? That’s enough ranting from me.
VIPE 🐍
Erratic - From the looks of things… you’re doing fantastic!! I’m so proud of you. This is epic.
I’ll report back on my experience in CA so far. One thing I know is I’ll need to bail on that awful apartment and unfortunately ditch my roommate. Break my lease.
This is the situation: I need a sanitary, clean place without chaos to get well. I want to focus on maintaining a pristine Whole Food Plant Based diet, exercising, meditation/yoga, hiking and nature, and use the energy I will gain for drawing, journaling, reading, volunteering, and gaining new skills and then a j o b .
I have to ruthlessly pursue this at the detriment of my roommate, but I need to think of #1… The Viper. She chose the place and it’s been absolute $::T. Mold, leaks, filth, roaches, sewer backups 🤮. The roommate eats like crap too, I don’t want a dirty fridge full of garbage foods Costco cases of meat (I’m Vegan). She has chaotic energy. She brought a crazy addict into the house every time the chick got kicked out of a sober house and for a full 5 weeks at one point. I was raging!! Plus the area is a criminal hotbed. The cars are in danger. Constant theft and break-ins. I’d need a gun to stay any longer. I’m trying to justify it I think, but I don’t need to.
It’s no wonder I hid in crap foods and slept all day because of the harm they cause me. Takeout Indian every night because I can’t cook in that gross kitchen, and then tons of snacks on top of it. Binging on Netflix and massive amounts of chips and cookies.
So I’ll have to find a place that I can afford.
Anyway? That’s enough ranting from me.
VIPE 🐍
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