Rose335

Newbeginning, Venus and Dee - what an insightful and inspirational exchange, really good to read and so true.

Newbeginning - you can't possible drink now! And I'm sure you won't.

Day 23. 4th Sunday without alcohol. Early days but how great do I feel?!

dizzybee

I too have succumbed to the ole what-if game, and it has never never helped me. All it's done is keep me from focusing on what I can be today, and from this point forward. I appreciate hearing that others circle round that track but I agree with Dee - all it does it provide "reason" to stay stuck. Screw that!

Day 20 for me now, and grateful I kept plans pretty chill so I could stay focused on the basics. That's helping me so much in these early days.

Wishing you all a lovely day, filled with strength and perhaps a little self-compassion.

Abraham

Good morning June class. Hope everyone has a great sunday. Nice and sunny here. Making it through today will mark 5 weeks sober. Glad I went this route. I'm still enjoying not being out of it all day. Now to try this while working. Finally going back to work tomorrow. First Monday after 8 months off, its always tough.

melski

Interesting topic for sure.
My list of what-if’s and perceived failures is very long and I think it contributed
to developing a drinking problem.
The old “what’s the use, I might as well drink” mentality has held me back for sure.
Over a month today for me.
Have a great day all.

Red78

I have to agree with you here, now that I'm not drinking I realise how many normal or non drinkers are around, before I thought everyone drank like me. My partner drinks nowhere near as much now that I'm not drinking.

Abraham

Good evening June class. I packing in early tonight. Today marks my 5th week sober mark, and I go back to work nice and early tomorrow after 8 months laid off. I call it a Mega Monday. Now I have to start a new habit of not stopping for rum on the way home from work. I'm sure I'll be fine.

Dee74

best wishes back at work Abraham.

D

Rose335

Me too Red on the number of normal' drinkers that I'm finding make up my circle of friends and beyond. I'm slightly embarrassed now to realise that the person who was always suggesting another drink was me! Still that's in the past now. Day 24 today. Congratulations on your month plus, Melski and your 20 days dizzybee. Hope your first day back at work goes well, Abraham.

Red78

Day 40 down for me. I spent the evening with mum and my aunty where I would normally drink wine with them and tonight I wasn't even fazed by them drinking, I just asked for a non alcoholic beverage and sat with that..
I could drive home and not have to get my partner to pick me up and that is such a good feeling.
Waking up sober and being able to drive at night are the biggest plus sides for me not drinking.

DJ1

Good morning all love reading all the posts from the weekend
Hitting milestones going out of ones comfort zone! & so much more

Some things get easier & some not so much had a bad day yesterday it’s funny when I was a drinker my hubby used to say you always get. Argumentative when you drink !! I used to agree with him. But yesterday he said since you’ve stopped drinking your really argumentative & rude to people !,
After I said what ever!, here we go with your **** again !! sat back & assessed the situation spent hours thinking & realized nope it’s not the drinking or non drinking yep it’s the situation I’m in maybe it’s just a bad marriage or maybe. His just an arrogant A hole I have. A lot to ponder over as I get more & more sober days behind me not jumping or making any life altering changes at this stage

Sorry just wanted to share vent anyone else finding their . Relationship with their partner is changing not for the better

Well I hope everyone has a great Monday & week

melski

Good morning everyone.
DJ1, sorry you had a bad day yesterday.
I am single but I am noticing since quitting alcohol my relationships are changing too.
Because our brains are changing, everything else is affected too.
It is fair for you to expect the right kind of support from your husband but he may not know how just yet.
Give it some time and try to communicate what you need as best you can.
Whatever decisions you make will be clearer with more time.

venuscat

I'm really sorry you are going through this dear DJ. s

For totally different reasons, my husband and I had some very very difficult months, and I wondered if....well, all sorts of things. I know I wasn't very nice for quite a long time there when I was resentful.

I wonder if you can tell your husband that you don't want him to speak to you that way? I would. We all have faults, make mistakes, but I think our partners could be a bit more gentle perhaps.

Sending huge hugs. ♥

Abraham

Good call dj1, I hope things work out. I would hate to see someone quitting drinking ruin a relationship.
I just got out of work for the first day in 8 months. Tired as can be. Lugging metal wall studs up stairs all day. We are building a wall around a paint line at a Chrysler plant. They are de-commissioning the line and building a new one. Our wall is a temp. debris wall. Working 10 hrs so with the overtime its good money. Feast of famine at my job these years. Hope everyone enjoys the evening.

DJ1

Thanks for the kind words & of wisdom Melski Venuscat & Abraham
I never though getting sober would cause more Problems in my marriage ! But it’s early in my sobriety & im not in a good mental space on many things so we will see how things go ! But on a side note I am more determined than ever to be sober life can Only get better!

Glad the first day back went well sounds like a tiring day you will sleep well tonight

Rose335

Day 25 here; looking forward to making it to 4 weeks on Friday. Nothing but benefits so far emotionally, health wise and financially. That's what I need to keep in my mind in the days to come. Hope everyone has a good day.

nadt

Hello everyone.

Newbeginnings on a light side of the emotions playing chess brought out for you, I'm thinking back to a thread that was started toward the beginning of my being sober- it was about how to unwind at night. People had great suggestions, one of which was playing solitaire. I hadn't played forever and decided to download an app. I joked the next day on the thread bc the app I downloaded had a timer. So, isnstead of a nice, relaxing game of solitaire, my competitive brain raced the clock--i had to keep playing until I won again at a faster time-- and i didn't even have a competitor. Lol

A, I hope your second day back at work goes well. I'm sure you are exhausted. Is your body sore being back after a break?

Way to go on the accomplishments everyone. I'm doing well--busy, happy and sober.

Abraham

good for you rose.

Red78

Day 42 for me, 6 weeks. This is my longest time sober in about 8 years. I need to be careful as it can be easy for me to trip up around this time. I need to fill my time in advance with things to do, especially weekends.
Yesterday the full moon/lunar eclipse turned my emotions on their head, I was all over the place but I managed to avoid drinking. I won't lie, I definitely thought about it but didn't follow through.. And that will be due to the number of days racked up so far.

Happy Wednesday everyone and just remember the energy can be very intense right now under the full moon/eclipse..

Dee74

I'm really pleased for you Red - congrats

D

Rose335

Red - 42 days. That is brilliant. I am envious and can't wait to get there so don't let us down by caving in now! Day 27 for me and I'm so looking forward to finally hitting the 4 week mark tomorrow. I wish everyone a good day .