Class of October 2014 Part 26
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,518
Oh, finally something I can do. Flowers! 
My mother adored orchids Arbor. I think it might be a bit of a generational thing, and they may not be as popular now. I don't much like them either.
But my gloxinias....that's another story. Plants that are over 25 years old that usually live just a few years. I've posted pictures before. I have one on my profile page down the bottom. I love plants. I have a LOT of them.
My mother adored orchids Arbor. I think it might be a bit of a generational thing, and they may not be as popular now. I don't much like them either.
But my gloxinias....that's another story. Plants that are over 25 years old that usually live just a few years. I've posted pictures before. I have one on my profile page down the bottom. I love plants. I have a LOT of them.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,877
Originally Posted by Conquest 
That cake looks amazing! The chia pudding, not so much. Lol. But I know it's really good for you.
I'm at home with a stupid tummy bug. Ugh. I hope everyine's day is starting off better than mine!
I'm at home with a stupid tummy bug. Ugh. I hope everyine's day is starting off better than mine!
Feel better, Conquest. There are so many bugs going around.
02.27.15 :): ▽VII△VIII
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,802
Oh no, Conquest. Feel better soon!
My head's a bit messed up today. I know I shouldn't weigh myself, but I did, and it was more than I felt ok with, so now I'm feeling very anxious about eating. I'm supposed to go to lunch with a friend, and I'm dreading it because I won't have as much control over what I eat. It's really getting to me. I had calculated my calories for the whole day and felt ok, but now this lunch thing came up, and I've lost my delicate sense of control. It feels like total chaos, like the day is ruined. It's intense enough to make me cry. Yeah, welcome to life with an eating disorder. Awesome. So I'm trying to continually re-center myself and focus on staying healthy and fed regardless of the number on the scale. It's the damn numbers that screw me up every time. Pounds, calories, steps...I let these numbers become the sole measure of my control over my life. It's hard to push through the intrusive thoughts, but I'm actively working on it.
Ugh, this blows.
My head's a bit messed up today. I know I shouldn't weigh myself, but I did, and it was more than I felt ok with, so now I'm feeling very anxious about eating. I'm supposed to go to lunch with a friend, and I'm dreading it because I won't have as much control over what I eat. It's really getting to me. I had calculated my calories for the whole day and felt ok, but now this lunch thing came up, and I've lost my delicate sense of control. It feels like total chaos, like the day is ruined. It's intense enough to make me cry. Yeah, welcome to life with an eating disorder. Awesome. So I'm trying to continually re-center myself and focus on staying healthy and fed regardless of the number on the scale. It's the damn numbers that screw me up every time. Pounds, calories, steps...I let these numbers become the sole measure of my control over my life. It's hard to push through the intrusive thoughts, but I'm actively working on it.
Ugh, this blows.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,518
I guess you are at your lunch now Briar; I hope you are OK.
As I know you know, this is all about progress, not perfection.
And you are doing REALLY well. I hope you can see that.
Awww Conquest, a tummy bug? It seems like you have had enough to deal with. But knowing you, and your positive attitude, you will use the time to catch up on some 'you time'. Sending love. ♥
As for me, I am taking some advice from Briar, and working through some stuff I did not work through. I have learned (although it's completely obvious) that if I don't work through pain, I will sabotage myself, one way or another.
This is all abut trust for me. I was a very trusting person who is no longer. I am wary of peoples' motives now, and I am isolating (when I'm not volunteering or shopping or walking....no social time). I can't get past the fact that I judged someone (my ex) so badly, and got it so wrong. So I guess I don't trust myself, either.
And the pain is not going away. And it won't, until I acknowledge all of this. OK, acknowledged, and shared.
Weird weather here, cool and grey, just the way I like it.
Hope everyone is having a good day.
As I know you know, this is all about progress, not perfection.
And you are doing REALLY well. I hope you can see that.
Awww Conquest, a tummy bug? It seems like you have had enough to deal with. But knowing you, and your positive attitude, you will use the time to catch up on some 'you time'. Sending love. ♥
As for me, I am taking some advice from Briar, and working through some stuff I did not work through. I have learned (although it's completely obvious) that if I don't work through pain, I will sabotage myself, one way or another.
This is all abut trust for me. I was a very trusting person who is no longer. I am wary of peoples' motives now, and I am isolating (when I'm not volunteering or shopping or walking....no social time). I can't get past the fact that I judged someone (my ex) so badly, and got it so wrong. So I guess I don't trust myself, either.
And the pain is not going away. And it won't, until I acknowledge all of this. OK, acknowledged, and shared.
Weird weather here, cool and grey, just the way I like it.
Hope everyone is having a good day.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,877
Hi, venuscat, and hugs.
It's always a good idea to work through situations and the emotions they generate; doing so frees us from the chains which restrain from moving on. I hope, though, that you don't blame yourself for not recognizing what your ex truly was; the onus is not on you to recognize deception or duplicity. Your exes shortcomings are not a reflection on you.
It's not a bad thing to be cautious but don't forget to look for the goodness that lies ahead.
It's always a good idea to work through situations and the emotions they generate; doing so frees us from the chains which restrain from moving on. I hope, though, that you don't blame yourself for not recognizing what your ex truly was; the onus is not on you to recognize deception or duplicity. Your exes shortcomings are not a reflection on you.
It's not a bad thing to be cautious but don't forget to look for the goodness that lies ahead.
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