tufty13

Stay strong and keep smiling Kiki. The class is getting its mojo back.

Anyone heard from canguy?

RedAndy

Struggling badly again today - panic attack at work, some very low and dark thoughts indeed, colleagues told me I should take the rest of the day off and I drove home which probably wasn't the best idea in the state of mind, feel so distant from everyone and not making sense of anything unable to explain to anyone, felt exhausted and got in bed - not feeling in a good place at all. AV has been absolutely screaming at me too, just cannot shut it down or seem to think rationally at all. Don't know how much longer I can keep this up I need some peace

tufty13

Hi Andy,

Sorry your struggling.

There's a real pattern emerging in this class and it's no coincidence.

I'm guessing you're around 70 to 80 days sober?

I saw my therapist this week who is a specialist in addiction counselling, she basically said, never underestimate just how bad PAWS can be.
It's what keeps many people from staying sober.

Take some deep breaths, hold those breaths and keep repeating.
It will pass Andy, you know it will.

Stay strong mate.

RedAndy

Cheers Tufty, yeah 76 days - energy just keeps feeling like it is completely sapped and a continual struggle to get motivated at all, feeling physically sick now and very strange

tufty13

You won't get motivated Andy because it's PAWS and that's what happens. You've got to get through this bit to get to the good bits later.

If you need to phone in sick tomorrow, phone in sick. Do ANYTHING you have to do to protect your sobriety because it will pass and you will come out the other side stronger and wiser and better equipped for the next time it happens.

If you give into your AV now after all this hard work I will personally come up to Manchester and beat you over the head with the smelly end of a wet fish. And worse than that your lovely wife and child are going to be really miffed.

Come on Andy, you CAN AND WILL WIN

tufty13

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post...rawal_syndrome

KiKi0615

Thanks Tufty!!!

Canguy!!! Oh yeah...where has he been? I hope he's ok!

KiKi0615

Great job SM!!!!!!!!!!

KiKi0615

How are you feeling HG?

KiKi0615

(((Andy)))

I'm so sorry you feel bad. I don't have much advice because my day is a lot like yours but staying busy is helping! I'm getting ready to go to a basketball game & then to exercise. Have you tried getting some exercise?

No matter what don't drink! I was sober for 9 weeks, drank one day (last Saturday) & have felt like sh-t ever since. I know it will pass in a few days so I just keep moving forward. Day 4 for me.

Alcohol SUCKS!!! Praying for you!!!!!!

KiKi0615

Wow! You're right Tufty! I had my slip at 75 days! Crazy but that will NOT happen again! Grrrrrr!!!! ;-)

Fabat50

Today I had (for once) some great news, out of the blue, wonderful, unexpected....something that made me feel WONDERFUL about myself.

So what did I want to do? First reaction? Buy a bottle of champagne or preferably 2 on the way home with some oysters, invite one of my friends with benefits round and celebrate.

When will this battle end?

I should add that I am watching Crocodile Dundee on the television and drinking green tea. But I would so much rather be with my champagne, oysters and a sex friend.

Sorry for saying it like it is.

lastchance77

Listen to the Man, he's spot on. The 70 - 90 day pattern we're seeing here (and in most early forums) can't just be a coincidence. My theory, which is most likely bollocks, is PAWS is your AV's final gasp, he's giving it all he has left. Don't feed him (or her, mine's a dude) or he'll win.

RedAndy

Thanks Kiki - this morning was pretty quiet to be honest and not busy at all in the office, I keep going into myself and not interacting at all with people / shutting off - haven't been in the gym quite as often as usual in the last couple of weeks but when I have my strength and energy are way below normal - dropping weights quite a bit and still a real struggle to complete sets.

Will take heed of your words though and realise there will be no benefit from drinking or drugs - good for you back on track with day 4 and keeping busy - will try to ensure I do that too.

Enjoy the basketball.

Fabat50

Mine's a dude too Last Chance. A slimy, sneaky, sweaty, shifty good for nothing dude. Some one here kindly reminded me the AV is not real. But I swear I can see mine sometimes lol!!

bblackbirdflyy

Hey guys, I'm still hanging in there... lost track of days just living life I suppose. Every free moment is spent studying. Sigh.

Lately I've been thinking about the implications of having had an alcoholic father. One who was never there emotionally and who ultimately ended up trying to kill himself on fathers day, but was unsuccessful. Hes now sober but our relationship is that of a couple of acquaintences (i cant spell that word it seems) I've never really put much thought into this. Actually reflecting on it and reading up on stuff... it may have affected me more than I had thought. Anyway. Off to class again.

Fabat50

I'm sorry about what happened with your Dad. It sounds so painful.

What are you studying bblack?

bblackbirdflyy

It's a little surreal to me... almost Like I block it all out. It was 6 years ago.

Nursing

Keepnitreal

Andy-what day is this for you? Hang in there. At least for me, once I passed through this hurdle it's got easy once again. Do you have sober recovery on your phone? That helped me. What about a meeting?
Don't listen to your AV. You don't want to start over.

Keepnitreal

He hasn't even responded to my last PM. I'm afraid he's stepped away for awhile. I hope he's ok because he was in a dark place.