AllieKat

Good morning! Today is the beginning of week 3 for me. I found a recipe for a healthy snack, zucchini chocolate squares. I think I am going to try to make them today.

Cissy

Hi, everyone! Sober day #11 for me. Feeling good and know that there can be no turning back. Sobriety is the only thing that makes sense, so where is the debate coming from? Go to hell, AV. That's where you belong.

Gorgeous day here in southern New England. Everything is so green! I adore Spring. What a great time to be "waking up" from the state of ongoing drunkenness. A new beginning. Tis the season!

It's not really Wednesday in Australia, is it? Someone said that and it made me start to google it. You had me going with the abdominal parasite too. I'm a bit slow on the uptake sometimes. It's part of my charm.

Have an amazing sober Sunday/Monday. Yes, sometimes it's a struggle but we all know in our hearts that it's worth the fight. ((Hugs))

Michtizz

Hello there,

I've been on here before - did a couple of months of sobriety back in March 2014 - then convinced myself this was something I could control in moderation..

Just back from a weekend at a music festival in Brighton - fell over on Thursday - banged my head and suspect I was a bit concussed. Have a whopping bruise on side of head.. That's not right is it? Thought I was in Berlin for a while - completely disorientated..

I have so, so much to be happy about in my life. Why do I try to nullify that happiness by drinking? It's destructive. I just go overboard..

Anyway, here I am... Completely unconvinced by my ability to do this... Day one...

TENtx

Hi, guys.

Checking in, day #12.

Just finished my Sunday 8 mile walk. Feeling good. I think I've given myself enough time in all this so I can now start eating better. My sugar cravings seem to be gone.

Hans, my AV, is still reaching out to me a few times each day, but so far I have not been tempted.

I've been reading about PAWS, so I can be ready for it. So far no real symptoms, but it's still early yet.

I must confess that somehow it feels like a long time ago, in some other life almost, that I was drinking, and that's kinda strange. Anyone else feel that way?

Here's to a sober today for all the Maypoles!

CaseyW

Welcome aboard Michtizz!

CaseyW

Yes, and I don't trust the feeling at all because I'm afraid it's going to make me forget why I'm sobering up in the first place. I know it has in past attempts at not drinking.

I don't want to feel bad or full of regret today but I also don't want to become complacent either. Trying to find that sweet spot is part of the early struggle, I guess.

Cissy

What's PAWS? I googled it and the only thing I saw was an animal rescue something or other. Congrats on day 12, Ten!! I haven't experienced that sensation of having been a drinker long ago, as if in another life. That must be strange.

Welcome Michtizz! So glad you found us. Hope you stick with it and us. Sorry you relapsed long ago. See what happens when we think we've got it all under control? Round and round we go.

opalblue

Hey Mich. I hear what you are saying. I did 43 sober days last October and lost my way again. Day one for me too. Feeling very shakey and would love to drink a glass of wine but I know I will hate myself for it.

So I won't. Damn this is hard

CaseyW

PAWS stands for post-acute withdrawal syndrome. Basically a bunch of stuff your body and mind might go thru as you adjust to not relying on booze or other drugs.

Michtizz

I don't find day one a struggle - probably because I've never been the type of drinker who drinks every day! It's the weekends that get me. I'm off on another holiday on Wednesday - Bratislava and then Vienna for the Eurovision Song Contest (don't judge me!!) - I'm already thinking I can't do this trip sober..

site1Q84

Michtizz, Welcome! glad to have you on board.

I find that making a plan helps. What will you do when you get a craving, or if you're stressed, or anxious? Having some sort of plan to deal with different situations, and just going about life in general, is very helpful.

TENtx

Thanks, Casey. That is excellent insight. My problem, too, is just as you described. I quit for a while, feel good, think I've got it whipped and go right back.

I'll be ready for it this time. My goal is to at least make new mistakes.

Welcome to Mich and Knb. I think you will enjoy the May class. Lots of interesting and helpful people here.

Cissy, you may find the info on PAWS helpful. As Casey said, it is the way your body reacts when it goes for awhile without all the toxic substances. Anxiety, depression, mood swings, inability to concentrate, stuff like that, all come and go. They say the episodes get shorter and less frequent as time goes on.

It's actually a good sign that your body can still adjust and is headed back to where it was.

And here is a hug, Cissy. You are so great at giving them out all the time, it's your turn for one.

Incontrol15

Sure is exciting watching May take shape. I know I've said it several times....but that's because it's true....YOU GUYS ROCK!

Michtizz

That's useful. It's probably a mix of boredom & habit. I like bars. I find them interesting.. I rarely drink at home, only out & about when having the need to be sociable.. But, when I drink, I really go for it.. Can't say no.. Have to be the life and soul...

I'm keen to not bash my head in again though. That's just dumb..

Cissy

Thanks for my own personal hug!!! I'm going to do a search for threads regarding PAWS. Sounds like something I need to bone up on.

CaseyW

Do you have to go on this trip then?

CaseyW

And your cheerleading and positivity has definitely been a help to me. Thank you for that!

I plan on emulating you and others like soberworlf and to keep one foot in this Newcomers forum for the foreseeable future instead of just focusing on my little core group on here as I've done in the past. I've mostly isolated in my drinking over the last couple of years and don't want to do that in my recovery.

Cissy

Well, THAT blows. PAWS lasts for 2 years. I'd better institute a new plan to incorporate walking every day to compensate for the low moods, irritability and anxiety.

Michtizz

It would be a considerable waste of money if I didn't!! I've already spent hundreds of pounds in planning it. I'm just going to have to be strong.

CaseyW

It only CAN last for two years. Other sources say as little as a few months.

It's not a set in stone certain to happen to you thing anyways. I'd just put it out of your mind or at least in a dark, little-used corner so that you'll just know if you're feeling a little wonky one day in six months, "Hey, maybe that's just that PAWS thing I read about back in May." Then come on here and talk about it or go to a meeting or call someone and talk about it and work toward a solution if necessary. IF it's ever even a problem for you. Us early recovering alcoholics have enough to worry about without starting to fret over things that might not even happen to us.