Class of March 2013 part 35
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
Good morning Marchers, it's a perfect summer's morning in Paradise. 24C? Check. Sunshine? Check. Light sea breeze? Check. We have just come back from the Farmer's Market which is awash with early summer produce. Good times. Now I will be a kind and patient daughter and take Mum Christmas shopping, even last year this was such an ordeal but this year I am shrugging my shoulders with a grin and remembering that it won't hurt me one bit.
Sass you are sounding so good and positive! Just a couple of months and you'll be all settled in the new place -- how far you've come and I'm not talking about house moves.
Have a good weekend peeps.
Sass you are sounding so good and positive! Just a couple of months and you'll be all settled in the new place -- how far you've come and I'm not talking about house moves.
Have a good weekend peeps.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 14,287
Thanks, Marcher. Yep, I get what your talking about. Somehow things have changed a bit. I'm not quite sure how to describe it. Perhaps I'm feeling less rigid about being around alcohol and I'm finding it easier to accept that I do sometimes miss it. But, i can't say I've been really seriously tempted. Possibly some acceptance beginning to happen.
I recently met another woman who is retired and about the same age as I am. She also had difficulties before retirement but afterwards she started drinking more and more. We seem to have a good bit in common. She also did the same IOP about 6 months before I did.
Nice that you will be taking your mum Christmas shopping :-)
I recently met another woman who is retired and about the same age as I am. She also had difficulties before retirement but afterwards she started drinking more and more. We seem to have a good bit in common. She also did the same IOP about 6 months before I did.
Nice that you will be taking your mum Christmas shopping :-)
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,169
Hi folks
Funny how many of us are having 'moments' the thing with recovery is that the further down the road we are, the easier it gets to rationalise them and figure a way to manage them without turning a 'moment' into a binge.
Gilmer, I am sure that there are things frowned upon by many in recovery, but I quite enjoy living vicariously through my husbands drinking. Let's see, you had your moment when looking at the bottle on the shelf. By the time you were pouring it down the sink you were in full control of the situation and merely enjoying the nice smell of a pleasant substance you no longer get to enjoy. If you were on a diet, the look of a slab of moist chocolate cake would be tempting, but having gotten past the desire to eat it yourself you can either resent the person who is eating it, or enjoy their enjoyment vicariously.
Hubby got to taste many new beers in boston from all the micro Brewers, and I often smelled his pint. I knew I would not be drinking it, but it was nice to use my sense of smell to pick out the various ingerdients and I enjoyed his pleasure. Not that I recommend this to anyone, or that I would consider it if I were shaky, but it's something I do.
Sass, well done love, both on dealing with your 'moment' and with immediately considering what plans to put into action to ensure you don't get caught out next time.
Babs, I hope you have had a lovely birthday weekend with your sister and managed to give yourself the best gift you could, another sober day.
Marcher, I find when I have to do something teeth clenching, I do much like you, I shrug, accept the inevitability of it, and think. " it won't kill me and it won't last forever" each year I have to go to the supermarket for last minute fresh produce just before Christmas. I used to get so worked up about it knowing how stressful it would be. Now I make sure I have plenty of time I dawdle around the aisle singing my favourite carols (quietly so I don't get chucked out for upsetting the other punters!) and in the endless queue I play solitaire on my mobile or read my kindle app as I listen to the stressed moms and grumpy dads and over excited screaming brats er children I am in a cocoon of serenity. I have finally learned in my last decade that it's not what we have to do, it is how we approach what we have to do, that affects our equilibrium.
And on that subject, my equilibrium has been sorely tilted out of kilter this weekend, leading to me having my own moment. Hubby sat me down yesterday for a 'talk' now, the fact it took him nearly 24 hours from when he got home to broach the subject told me it was heavy, and it was. We had anticipated and prepared for a return to Boston early in the new year, hubby by the end of January, me shortly after. Now it seems extremely unlikely we will return until at least the end of the year as the next phase of the project he is overseeing has been postponed until then. We are currently marketing our house for rent ( though thankfully no one has as yet been processed) Molly has had her rabies jab, we left all our summer clothes and various other things in storage out there, I have not been looking for a more permanent job.... The list goes on, basically mentally, emotionally and practically, we were in preparation for an upcoming move. Now it is all in abeyance. The worst part is I have all this anger and frustration inside and nowhere to direct it, it's certainly not hubbys fault and he is suffering the same feelings about it all. I just am not sure how to feel about it all at the moment other than let down, depressed and extremely fed up. I am talking up the positives, we are no worse off, I get chance to do more work on the house and garden before we go ( if we decide we still want to after all this) I can probably extend my job back at the opticians if I want to, we get to see more of our grandson before he is too old to hang around with us 'olds' .... But inside I am aching at the moment. Yesterday I had a F it I might as well have a drink moment, but I knew where it had come from and what the consequences would be so didn't allow it head room. But it is still a very physical response and in itself take recovering from.
Duff, your niece will love Boston, and if we do get back there at the end of the year, I hope we do get a chance to get together.
Sass, I am upset we will no longer be moving buddies, but I know you have the experience, the inner strength and the determination to get through this all sober. You can still pm me about anything at all, and there are so many moving related apps these days to help you to plan things it's untrue. I found it really helpful when we moved to Fife and that was found years ago now.
North I love the photo I just want to hug that face!
Well guys, it is 21 months today I can mope about the move or I can celebrate my newly published novel! Yes guys, I am now a fully fledged online self published author ( which means diddly squat considering some of the dross folk put out in the ether, but I am so proud of myself that I have seen this through from start to finish, I typed that title months ago with an idea in my head and now there is something tangible to show for my work. I actually think it is pretty good too, if I am allowed to blow my own trumpet.
Anyone who wants a look at it can download a 15% free sample but the book is not exactly prohibitive to buy. If you are interested pm me.
Dee in the acknowledgements I mentioned SR, as I use a fictional version of it in my book.
Well this rubber ball is already bouncing back
Oh did I mention, hubby went out with our son last night, and a couple of friends. I text him at midnight to say I was going to bed. At 1:30 he called to say he was not going to be able to get a taxi home as the town was mobbed. So at 2am I was doing a 30 mile round trip dropping various friends off at their homes before bringing hubby back here. Waaaay above wifely duties! I wasn't even mad, as he is good to me, supportive and loving, rarely goes out drinking has a lot of stress in his life and very rarely has asked me to out myself out in that way. Again I though he is annoyingly perky this morning. Where did I put that ****** doll??
Laters my lovely ones, thanks for letting me vent. You didn't get any choice in the matter? Tough!
Funny how many of us are having 'moments' the thing with recovery is that the further down the road we are, the easier it gets to rationalise them and figure a way to manage them without turning a 'moment' into a binge.
Gilmer, I am sure that there are things frowned upon by many in recovery, but I quite enjoy living vicariously through my husbands drinking. Let's see, you had your moment when looking at the bottle on the shelf. By the time you were pouring it down the sink you were in full control of the situation and merely enjoying the nice smell of a pleasant substance you no longer get to enjoy. If you were on a diet, the look of a slab of moist chocolate cake would be tempting, but having gotten past the desire to eat it yourself you can either resent the person who is eating it, or enjoy their enjoyment vicariously.
Hubby got to taste many new beers in boston from all the micro Brewers, and I often smelled his pint. I knew I would not be drinking it, but it was nice to use my sense of smell to pick out the various ingerdients and I enjoyed his pleasure. Not that I recommend this to anyone, or that I would consider it if I were shaky, but it's something I do.
Sass, well done love, both on dealing with your 'moment' and with immediately considering what plans to put into action to ensure you don't get caught out next time.
Babs, I hope you have had a lovely birthday weekend with your sister and managed to give yourself the best gift you could, another sober day.
Marcher, I find when I have to do something teeth clenching, I do much like you, I shrug, accept the inevitability of it, and think. " it won't kill me and it won't last forever" each year I have to go to the supermarket for last minute fresh produce just before Christmas. I used to get so worked up about it knowing how stressful it would be. Now I make sure I have plenty of time I dawdle around the aisle singing my favourite carols (quietly so I don't get chucked out for upsetting the other punters!) and in the endless queue I play solitaire on my mobile or read my kindle app as I listen to the stressed moms and grumpy dads and over excited screaming brats er children I am in a cocoon of serenity. I have finally learned in my last decade that it's not what we have to do, it is how we approach what we have to do, that affects our equilibrium.
And on that subject, my equilibrium has been sorely tilted out of kilter this weekend, leading to me having my own moment. Hubby sat me down yesterday for a 'talk' now, the fact it took him nearly 24 hours from when he got home to broach the subject told me it was heavy, and it was. We had anticipated and prepared for a return to Boston early in the new year, hubby by the end of January, me shortly after. Now it seems extremely unlikely we will return until at least the end of the year as the next phase of the project he is overseeing has been postponed until then. We are currently marketing our house for rent ( though thankfully no one has as yet been processed) Molly has had her rabies jab, we left all our summer clothes and various other things in storage out there, I have not been looking for a more permanent job.... The list goes on, basically mentally, emotionally and practically, we were in preparation for an upcoming move. Now it is all in abeyance. The worst part is I have all this anger and frustration inside and nowhere to direct it, it's certainly not hubbys fault and he is suffering the same feelings about it all. I just am not sure how to feel about it all at the moment other than let down, depressed and extremely fed up. I am talking up the positives, we are no worse off, I get chance to do more work on the house and garden before we go ( if we decide we still want to after all this) I can probably extend my job back at the opticians if I want to, we get to see more of our grandson before he is too old to hang around with us 'olds' .... But inside I am aching at the moment. Yesterday I had a F it I might as well have a drink moment, but I knew where it had come from and what the consequences would be so didn't allow it head room. But it is still a very physical response and in itself take recovering from.
Duff, your niece will love Boston, and if we do get back there at the end of the year, I hope we do get a chance to get together.
Sass, I am upset we will no longer be moving buddies, but I know you have the experience, the inner strength and the determination to get through this all sober. You can still pm me about anything at all, and there are so many moving related apps these days to help you to plan things it's untrue. I found it really helpful when we moved to Fife and that was found years ago now.
North I love the photo I just want to hug that face!
Well guys, it is 21 months today I can mope about the move or I can celebrate my newly published novel! Yes guys, I am now a fully fledged online self published author ( which means diddly squat considering some of the dross folk put out in the ether, but I am so proud of myself that I have seen this through from start to finish, I typed that title months ago with an idea in my head and now there is something tangible to show for my work. I actually think it is pretty good too, if I am allowed to blow my own trumpet.
Anyone who wants a look at it can download a 15% free sample but the book is not exactly prohibitive to buy. If you are interested pm me.
Dee in the acknowledgements I mentioned SR, as I use a fictional version of it in my book.
Well this rubber ball is already bouncing back
Oh did I mention, hubby went out with our son last night, and a couple of friends. I text him at midnight to say I was going to bed. At 1:30 he called to say he was not going to be able to get a taxi home as the town was mobbed. So at 2am I was doing a 30 mile round trip dropping various friends off at their homes before bringing hubby back here. Waaaay above wifely duties! I wasn't even mad, as he is good to me, supportive and loving, rarely goes out drinking has a lot of stress in his life and very rarely has asked me to out myself out in that way. Again I though he is annoyingly perky this morning. Where did I put that ****** doll??
Laters my lovely ones, thanks for letting me vent. You didn't get any choice in the matter? Tough!
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Congratulations on publishing your opus! I hope you get a lot of takers!
So, so sorry, though, that your hopes and plans are dashed for the foreseeable future.
Perhaps there is a special reason for you to stay in Scotland that you aren't yet aware of. I know you will bring great joy wherever you're physically stationed!
Although we'll certainly miss you over here!
So, so sorry, though, that your hopes and plans are dashed for the foreseeable future.
Perhaps there is a special reason for you to stay in Scotland that you aren't yet aware of. I know you will bring great joy wherever you're physically stationed!Although we'll certainly miss you over here!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
Good morning from Paradise Marchers. We have been hearing about heavy rain in the drought affected west of the US, I hope there is plenty more of it.
Toots I will be lining up for your book as you know, it's very exciting.
Well I took Mum shopping and of course it wasn't an ordeal at all. She didn't have to get all that much but, best of all, I got her to spend some money on herself as well so she came away with a new everyday handbag and some new shoes. All up she got exactly what she wanted in a couple of hours, we came home to a late lunch and watched the golf -- which she enjoys -- as we ate.
I find that the lessons in recovery are endless, I thought it was getting over alcohol that would be the biggest thing. In fact it's learning to live sober that is the main part of the game, two years down the track I'm still learning.
Have a good Sumonday peeps.
Toots I will be lining up for your book as you know, it's very exciting.
Well I took Mum shopping and of course it wasn't an ordeal at all. She didn't have to get all that much but, best of all, I got her to spend some money on herself as well so she came away with a new everyday handbag and some new shoes. All up she got exactly what she wanted in a couple of hours, we came home to a late lunch and watched the golf -- which she enjoys -- as we ate.
I find that the lessons in recovery are endless, I thought it was getting over alcohol that would be the biggest thing. In fact it's learning to live sober that is the main part of the game, two years down the track I'm still learning.
Have a good Sumonday peeps.
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
Well, I'll tell y'all since I don't want to tell my mom. It would just make her sad, too.
I had a sudden melancholy moment today while at the store. I saw a giant candy cane, you know the kind that you give as a gag gift. Except, I used to give one to my grandfather every year for Christmas. He loved breaking it up in pieces to eat.
True, honest emotion is one of the gifts we get from not drinking.
I had a sudden melancholy moment today while at the store. I saw a giant candy cane, you know the kind that you give as a gag gift. Except, I used to give one to my grandfather every year for Christmas. He loved breaking it up in pieces to eat.
True, honest emotion is one of the gifts we get from not drinking.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
trach, my grandfather always had a bowl of those little round individually wrapped peppermints at his house. They were in a glass chicken with a lid. He always put one in his coffee.
When we buried him, my mom put one in his trouser pocket. Really sweet. Don't want him going to the afterlife without his coffee sweetener.
Hi, Marchers. Is it summer yet? I've been inside all day. This is not a good thing.
When we buried him, my mom put one in his trouser pocket. Really sweet. Don't want him going to the afterlife without his coffee sweetener.
Hi, Marchers. Is it summer yet? I've been inside all day. This is not a good thing.
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,169
Haha Dee, I said I mentioned SR, I didn't mention you!
Should any characters in my book share more than a passing resemblance to any recovering drunks I happen to associate with daily it's purely coincidental!
Marcher I have just heard about the cafe hostage situation in Sydney, thinking of all you antipodeans as you await news.
Trachy, what a shame we spent so many years shying away from intense emotion when it makes us feel so alive. Happy, sad, melancholy., truly content, all feelings. We never truly experience as active addicts.
North, how are you doing? What are you doing to combat your SAD this year? I know you have a holiday booked but what are you doing day by day? Are you writing? Have you been taking the vitamin D's? Please take care of yourself, I am sure your hubby worries for you. X
Bimini, that picture of the mints gave me a happy memory, they had a bowl of them at Learning Ally in Boston and I always snaffled a couple on the way out for my dry throat after 2 hours of recording!
Marcher, I think all we can focus on in the first year is living without alcohol, managing to find ways of saying no, avoiding certain situations cutting contact with some people. Once we have more of a handle on living day to day without alcohol ( either the drinking of it or the avoidance of it) being our focus, we need to learn to live life as it ought to be lived. It really is like being reborn, we are super sensitive in our new skin, everything feels exaggerated, emotion is are scary but then suddenly we find we are just kinda 'normal'!
I wish I could make newbies believe it gets better, gets easier, but I know I could never have believed I would enjoy a booze free life when I was actively drinking or in my early attempts at stopping.
I needed to stop bargaining with AV and just tell it to get the f*^* out of my life.
Should any characters in my book share more than a passing resemblance to any recovering drunks I happen to associate with daily it's purely coincidental!
Marcher I have just heard about the cafe hostage situation in Sydney, thinking of all you antipodeans as you await news.
Trachy, what a shame we spent so many years shying away from intense emotion when it makes us feel so alive. Happy, sad, melancholy., truly content, all feelings. We never truly experience as active addicts.
North, how are you doing? What are you doing to combat your SAD this year? I know you have a holiday booked but what are you doing day by day? Are you writing? Have you been taking the vitamin D's? Please take care of yourself, I am sure your hubby worries for you. X
Bimini, that picture of the mints gave me a happy memory, they had a bowl of them at Learning Ally in Boston and I always snaffled a couple on the way out for my dry throat after 2 hours of recording!
Marcher, I think all we can focus on in the first year is living without alcohol, managing to find ways of saying no, avoiding certain situations cutting contact with some people. Once we have more of a handle on living day to day without alcohol ( either the drinking of it or the avoidance of it) being our focus, we need to learn to live life as it ought to be lived. It really is like being reborn, we are super sensitive in our new skin, everything feels exaggerated, emotion is are scary but then suddenly we find we are just kinda 'normal'!
I wish I could make newbies believe it gets better, gets easier, but I know I could never have believed I would enjoy a booze free life when I was actively drinking or in my early attempts at stopping.
I needed to stop bargaining with AV and just tell it to get the f*^* out of my life.
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,169
I forgot to say, hubby has taken the merc this week, so I have decided rather than get the bus all week, I am going to take his Porsche 911. Wouldn't have dreamed of that when I was drinking!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,521
Ooooo go you toots my love...and take a photo....we need to see that!!
The hostage situation...sigh....the goddang media need to get a frikkin clue....they have played into this guy's hands all day. The hostages are being released, slowly. I believe they will all be OK.
This is one lone guy who is seeking retribution for a fellow religious fanatic who was arrested in the same place recently....do I sound arrogant? Tough. You will all see that this is what this is. And the melodrama is a disgrace.
V xx
(And please tell us how we can read your book, when you are ready! ♥♥♥)
The hostage situation...sigh....the goddang media need to get a frikkin clue....they have played into this guy's hands all day. The hostages are being released, slowly. I believe they will all be OK.
This is one lone guy who is seeking retribution for a fellow religious fanatic who was arrested in the same place recently....do I sound arrogant? Tough. You will all see that this is what this is. And the melodrama is a disgrace.
V xx
(And please tell us how we can read your book, when you are ready! ♥♥♥)
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