Class of April 2014 Part 14
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,315
Morning Fools,
Monday 8.34 am.
I'd post a drawing, but I can barely manage stick figures...
ST: Great story on a being the sober knight! You must be on the right path as they say...
It's hot again, 33 degrees in the shade, 50 out in it I reckon.
Great detox living in Asia....!!!!
I think that's why everyone drinks so much.
When I was in Melbourne I went to visit an old friend. I've known him for ten years, Bullarto Pete, a local legend really. When I first met him he was doing ok, living in an old family home, really intelligent, quite healthy, but he loved a drink.
Red wine.
Ten years later (I'm cutting this short) I went around to see him.
He was a wreck.
In bed all day, living in the shed out the back of his former family home.
Lost everything and still couldn't figure out why...!
Unbelievable but true.
2 days before I left to comeback I went around and he barely with it....
This has been playing on my mind a lot, so I'm using this thread again as therapy.....
Anyway, he was really sick, mentally and physically.
I tried speaking with him for a while. The guy he lives with was worried but Pete refused to get any help.
In Australia if you refuse medical help, or in this case, to get in ambulance, the paramedics wont make you.....
So in the end I called them anyway, whilst he was abusing me and carrying on.
These two were so pissed they didn't really know what was going on.
One drinks white the other red, living in the sheds out the back of a once really nice property.
Waking up drinking sort of thing.
They came, an ambulance with two paramedics.
After an hour he went with them. They had done their tests, he had a fever, low heart rate, high something else........ He was nearly dead.
He was admitted to hospital and spent over a week in intensive care, the heaviest ward we have.
He is mentally and physically wrecked, maybe a comeback, but from way behind now and never back to who he was.
He was literally drinking himself to death and wanted to do it.
In a sense I saved his life, the doctors said he would probably have died that night.
Alcohol........
I've never seen it that bad but I know it, and what was I doing there anyway....?
There are so many things I need to let go of.
Forgiveness is the key, we are all human after all.
My AV has been up and about, using the old tricks.
I just need to remind myself that for people like me alcohol can actually kill you if you let it and feed that wolf long enough.
What a great relief there are the Fools to come and share your problems with.....
stay tuned.......
Monday 8.34 am.
I'd post a drawing, but I can barely manage stick figures...
ST: Great story on a being the sober knight! You must be on the right path as they say...
It's hot again, 33 degrees in the shade, 50 out in it I reckon.
Great detox living in Asia....!!!!
I think that's why everyone drinks so much.
When I was in Melbourne I went to visit an old friend. I've known him for ten years, Bullarto Pete, a local legend really. When I first met him he was doing ok, living in an old family home, really intelligent, quite healthy, but he loved a drink.
Red wine.
Ten years later (I'm cutting this short) I went around to see him.
He was a wreck.
In bed all day, living in the shed out the back of his former family home.
Lost everything and still couldn't figure out why...!
Unbelievable but true.
2 days before I left to comeback I went around and he barely with it....
This has been playing on my mind a lot, so I'm using this thread again as therapy.....
Anyway, he was really sick, mentally and physically.
I tried speaking with him for a while. The guy he lives with was worried but Pete refused to get any help.
In Australia if you refuse medical help, or in this case, to get in ambulance, the paramedics wont make you.....
So in the end I called them anyway, whilst he was abusing me and carrying on.
These two were so pissed they didn't really know what was going on.
One drinks white the other red, living in the sheds out the back of a once really nice property.
Waking up drinking sort of thing.
They came, an ambulance with two paramedics.
After an hour he went with them. They had done their tests, he had a fever, low heart rate, high something else........ He was nearly dead.
He was admitted to hospital and spent over a week in intensive care, the heaviest ward we have.
He is mentally and physically wrecked, maybe a comeback, but from way behind now and never back to who he was.
He was literally drinking himself to death and wanted to do it.
In a sense I saved his life, the doctors said he would probably have died that night.
Alcohol........
I've never seen it that bad but I know it, and what was I doing there anyway....?
There are so many things I need to let go of.
Forgiveness is the key, we are all human after all.
My AV has been up and about, using the old tricks.
I just need to remind myself that for people like me alcohol can actually kill you if you let it and feed that wolf long enough.
What a great relief there are the Fools to come and share your problems with.....
stay tuned.......
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Obo, ... really hope Pete makes it. Even though he may never get back to where he was, ...it's possible he can find a way to find some meaning and peace of mind if the miracle happens for him. Use that term loosely maybe, but I've witnessed it before, ...in my own life even.
Good on you for caring enough to be there for him , and doing the right thing. What you've done is the 12th step from the program of AA. It's a powerful thing strengthening your own sobriety, and life.
Good on ya, man.
Not much today outside of finishing a long neglected window repair before the first day back to work this evening. Felt really, really good to be working out of my old carpenter's belt .
....
Good on you for caring enough to be there for him , and doing the right thing. What you've done is the 12th step from the program of AA. It's a powerful thing strengthening your own sobriety, and life.
Good on ya, man.
Not much today outside of finishing a long neglected window repair before the first day back to work this evening. Felt really, really good to be working out of my old carpenter's belt .
....
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 801
Obo- I'm sorry about your friend. Maybe you were an answer to his prayers (spoken or not). And I'm so glad you're a fool. you're friend is lucky to have you. Your big heart shines right through your posts. I'm glad you're taking care of yourself! Please keep up the good work - you're so worth it 
.
ST! Love your story! Knight in shining armor indeed! Soli- the iron iced cake cracked me up.
Adna and free - I always enjoy hearing your wisdom. Adna, I think your thoughts on RW were right on.
Up - yes, we are what we think. And I've been letting stress get the best of me. Must think more positive things!
Everyone- I think of you often. I'm amazed at the reality of addiction and how powerful of a hold it can have on anyone.
Never give up , fools.
.ST! Love your story! Knight in shining armor indeed! Soli- the iron iced cake cracked me up.
Adna and free - I always enjoy hearing your wisdom. Adna, I think your thoughts on RW were right on.
Up - yes, we are what we think. And I've been letting stress get the best of me. Must think more positive things!
Everyone- I think of you often. I'm amazed at the reality of addiction and how powerful of a hold it can have on anyone.
Never give up , fools.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Too far up North
Posts: 284
Obo that's amazing. I don't personally know you and I can't even begin to guess what kind of things you were put on this earth to do, but that was surely one of them. How awesome is that? Really think about it, out of your whole life from beginning to end, that's got to be one of the most righteous things you will have ever done. That's worth having a sober celebration. A "soberation" lol
Keep up the good work, ST
The Simpsons/Family Guy crossover episode airs next month!
Keep up the good work, ST
The Simpsons/Family Guy crossover episode airs next month!
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
Home from the Lake - Fun & memorable sober week-end! It is late & I wish I had the day at home tomorrow but will be off to work so am going to finish my tea & get some sleep....glad to be home & in my nice comfy bed.
You all inspire me & give me hope Have a good week!
You all inspire me & give me hope
Have a good week!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Too far up North
Posts: 284
Nighttime..everyone sleeping..so quiet I can hear the crickets outside even with the windows shut. No immediate responsibilities...nothing to "take care of"...no one will call or knock on the door. I am not bothered. I don't have to be anxious about what I should be doing..I don't have to do anything. I ShOULD be sleeping but I don't have to and I get so wrapped up in the freedom that comes with staying up late, I don't make myself. I want to procrastinate the beginning of a new day. I don't feel like getting up in the morning and doing "things". I know in my right mind that staying up won't make it come any later, but I don't have to use my right mind. I can do whatever I want with my mind right now. I can daydream at night.
Still a little nagging voice in the back of my head says "but you'll be tired tomorrow! You'll regret it!" "You told yourself you were going to start going to sleep earlier!"
Oh shush your fuss you negative Nancy. I'll sleep when I please.
It is in my nature to go to sleep at 3:00am and wake up at 11am. Of course this isn't possible as I have to conform to society's "normal" times of doing things. I understand and I'm not angry about it but it still sucks. I also have a couple of things that would prevent that from happening anyway, but they're my kids and I still love them.
It's also like I know I'm gonna have problems falling asleep so I just stay up until I'm good and exhausted. I'm too impatient to lay there and wait for it to magically happen.
Well here I am procrastinating the inevitable but I'm actually starting to get sleepy Thank God.
Still a little nagging voice in the back of my head says "but you'll be tired tomorrow! You'll regret it!" "You told yourself you were going to start going to sleep earlier!"
Oh shush your fuss you negative Nancy. I'll sleep when I please.
It is in my nature to go to sleep at 3:00am and wake up at 11am. Of course this isn't possible as I have to conform to society's "normal" times of doing things. I understand and I'm not angry about it but it still sucks. I also have a couple of things that would prevent that from happening anyway, but they're my kids and I still love them.
It's also like I know I'm gonna have problems falling asleep so I just stay up until I'm good and exhausted. I'm too impatient to lay there and wait for it to magically happen.
Well here I am procrastinating the inevitable but I'm actually starting to get sleepy Thank God.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 2,804
Solil, I hope you sleep well. Your night time post was poetic, I wonder if your creativity is still bursting to express itself before the end of the day. What happens if you spend the day drawing/painting/writing/pianoing, do you get to sleep easier, or is it even more difficult?
Obo, thank goodness for your compassion, I hope Pete can cling to this lifeline. Alcohol is a killer for so many people, yet it's still so freely available, what madness. Thank heavens for you, and for your loving choices in a very difficult situation.
Mariah, what a beautiful place you've been to. Glad to hear you had a great weekend.
It's a bank holiday today, so I'm hoping to do some piano practice. Solil, I love the idea of imagining the difficult bits as part of a video game or puzzle. I'll try to persevere in a gaming mind frame and see if I can push through to the next level.
Many Fools are trying new things and accomplishing so much at the moment, I feel I want to contribute to our growing repertoire of creations.
Have a creative day all.
Obo, thank goodness for your compassion, I hope Pete can cling to this lifeline. Alcohol is a killer for so many people, yet it's still so freely available, what madness. Thank heavens for you, and for your loving choices in a very difficult situation.
Mariah, what a beautiful place you've been to. Glad to hear you had a great weekend.
It's a bank holiday today, so I'm hoping to do some piano practice. Solil, I love the idea of imagining the difficult bits as part of a video game or puzzle. I'll try to persevere in a gaming mind frame and see if I can push through to the next level.
Many Fools are trying new things and accomplishing so much at the moment, I feel I want to contribute to our growing repertoire of creations.
Have a creative day all.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Oso- I was on the same drawing level as u lol, I convinced myself cause I was lefty i just wasn't gonna be an artist of some sort, forcing myself to read the books on learning really put it into perspective, try it! I hope your other issues at the moment work out the best they possibly can. <3
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Too far up North
Posts: 284
Freein that never occurred to me. Maybe art would be a good way to work out my mental energy before bedtime. I've been doing good about practicing piano regularly but I haven't drawn since I was staying at my dads after mom passed. I haven't worked on the portrait of my mom I started while I was there. I never even started the drawing I said I'd consider doing that the lady on FB asked me to do. I feel bad about that. I have no desire to do it.
But when we went to kindergarten open house the teacher gave us an "about me" project to do, just to decorate a piece of construction paper with things to help the children get to know each other and their interests. Well, I seriously spent hours (collectively) working on it. Don't worry, I did involve my daughter and she had a big hand in the creation and personalization it. But I got somewhat obsessed with the artistic aspect. I actually started to feel crazy for putting so much energy into it. We're not even going to be able to keep it, as it's going into a book. My daughter is upset about that, and maybe if I didn't put so much work into it she wouldn't care.
Anyway maybe my mind is just craving an outlet. Maybe I wasn't crazy for going full force into the project, it was just the first creative thing I've done in a long time. That makes me feel better. I know I have an over active imagination and sometimes I confuse it with insanity.
But when we went to kindergarten open house the teacher gave us an "about me" project to do, just to decorate a piece of construction paper with things to help the children get to know each other and their interests. Well, I seriously spent hours (collectively) working on it. Don't worry, I did involve my daughter and she had a big hand in the creation and personalization it. But I got somewhat obsessed with the artistic aspect. I actually started to feel crazy for putting so much energy into it. We're not even going to be able to keep it, as it's going into a book. My daughter is upset about that, and maybe if I didn't put so much work into it she wouldn't care.
Anyway maybe my mind is just craving an outlet. Maybe I wasn't crazy for going full force into the project, it was just the first creative thing I've done in a long time. That makes me feel better. I know I have an over active imagination and sometimes I confuse it with insanity.
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
ST - that character has a lot of character! Love the "lazy eye"!
Loved your night time post Solilo & hope you got some sleep Enjoy this last week before school starts.
Freein, I hope you have a lovely "holiday" at home today.
Obo - I'm so glad you were there for your friend. It is so tragic what the liquid poison
can do to a soul. I hope that he may find a way out of what really is a living hell.
Taking a few minutes with a cup of coffee before I get going here this morning. My Son's Dad picked him up after we got home last night & brought a bunch of fresh veggies from the garden....going to get a bunch prepared to take to work, get my flowers watered.
Loved your night time post Solilo & hope you got some sleep
Enjoy this last week before school starts.Freein, I hope you have a lovely "holiday" at home today.
Obo - I'm so glad you were there for your friend. It is so tragic what the liquid poison
can do to a soul. I hope that he may find a way out of what really is a living hell.
Taking a few minutes with a cup of coffee before I get going here this morning. My Son's Dad picked him up after we got home last night & brought a bunch of fresh veggies from the garden....going to get a bunch prepared to take to work, get my flowers watered.
greenturtle
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 208
Hi guys - I just wanted to check in with you all and let you know how I am doing. Over my vacation/holiday I was diagnosed by my doctor as having severe recurrent major depressive disorder. It's recurrent since this is my second time with having MDD. The first time was five years ago and it was really bad. My first therapy appointment was set for this Thursday but i changed it this morning to tomorrow because I can't wait any longer to see someone. I feel awful. I was dreading work today. I am here but not really here. I've lost pleasure in all the usual things i once loved: food, reading, music, socializing. It's an effort to drive. I can't concentrate, I'm super irritable to my husband and son and break down in tears at the most random times. Ugh. Anyway, I just wanted to let you all know I am still sober and on day 9. You will probably only hear from me randomly over the next couple weeks as even writing this post is an effort.
Thanks for all the support you guys have given me. I wouldn't be right back here in this group if it wasn't for all your positive thoughts, advice, and encouragement. Thx.
Thanks for all the support you guys have given me. I wouldn't be right back here in this group if it wasn't for all your positive thoughts, advice, and encouragement. Thx.
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
I'm sorry that things are so difficult for you right now Kelly & hope that things look brighter soon - will be thinking of you.
I'm feeling overwhelmed & worried tonight - My Son took a hard hit to the head while wake boarding yesterday before we left the lake & had to leave work after a couple of hours today....saw the Doctor & he has a concussion. (He is very stubborn & can't stand for me to "fuss" over him) He went home & is alone & I am imagining all the worst things that might go wrong......that is what I do. I went for a drive then down to the river where I prayed that God help him to heal quickly. Going to make some tension tamer tea & add a few drops of anxiety soother drops. He will be 21 in a little over a month & I guess I will forever worry about him. He really has his S##@ together.....Very responsible with job & paying his bills (bullheaded about accepting any financial support from me), completely committed to fitness & healthy eating, starting EMT program on his Bday at local community college, but He is very much a loner & I of course feel guilty that I have something to do with that. I've got to deal with the load of guilt I pack around...it is extremely heavy. Thanks for letting me unload. I am in my 14th day without drinking today.
I'm feeling overwhelmed & worried tonight - My Son took a hard hit to the head while wake boarding yesterday before we left the lake & had to leave work after a couple of hours today....saw the Doctor & he has a concussion. (He is very stubborn & can't stand for me to "fuss" over him) He went home & is alone & I am imagining all the worst things that might go wrong......that is what I do. I went for a drive then down to the river where I prayed that God help him to heal quickly. Going to make some tension tamer tea & add a few drops of anxiety soother drops. He will be 21 in a little over a month & I guess I will forever worry about him. He really has his S##@ together.....Very responsible with job & paying his bills (bullheaded about accepting any financial support from me), completely committed to fitness & healthy eating, starting EMT program on his Bday at local community college, but He is very much a loner & I of course feel guilty that I have something to do with that. I've got to deal with the load of guilt I pack around...it is extremely heavy. Thanks for letting me unload. I am in my 14th day without drinking today.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Too far up North
Posts: 284
I can't believe it's been over 7 weeks..
Other than the party situation I faced last week (that was difficult!) it seems to be a lot easier now on a day to day basis to just accept that "this is the way it is". I may not like it sometimes, but it is what it is. I've come to terms with it. And I trust myself enough now to actually start allowing myself to feel proud. I don't really have that worry that "this is only temporary" anymore. It's my life.
Other than the party situation I faced last week (that was difficult!) it seems to be a lot easier now on a day to day basis to just accept that "this is the way it is". I may not like it sometimes, but it is what it is. I've come to terms with it. And I trust myself enough now to actually start allowing myself to feel proud. I don't really have that worry that "this is only temporary" anymore. It's my life.
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