What kind of Mother would do this?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 104
What kind of Mother would do this?
Hello....I think this may be my first post. Been hanging around in the chat room on and off. A little about myself. I started drinking around 11 to 12 years old. I have always been a weekend binge drinker. Saw it as partying...drank whatever I could. I was a teen mom...finished high school and college. Started drinking vodka to cut back on calories. Met my now husband and we continued to drink on weekends as the norm....but he never had a problem. We moved in together and my drinking got worse. So bad I sought therapy...my Mom took me to an AA meeting....then I finally did it...got a DUI. All while my son was watching what a mess I had become. I got sober about 5 months and got pregnant back to back where I now have 4 beautiful children. I thought I was cured and could control my drinking so I began drinking again....just to be a mess again. Binge drinking into Monday because im so hung over....I can't continue to do this. I can't do this again to my children like I did my oldest one. I can't keep breaking my husbands heart. My 4 year old told me I broke something and I don't even recall. Its like the devil takes over. I'm so ashamed...and scared to even ask my family amd friends for help....because how can I have failed again? What kind of Mother would get drunk over and over again putting their children in danger? 3 days sober for me....this has to be for the rest of my life!!!!
Last edited by Newme2018; 06-14-2018 at 01:28 PM. Reason: Typos
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,874
Welcome to the posting side of SR, NewMe2018. Well done on 3 sober days.
Alcoholism is a terrible disease. I believe that there isn’t a human being alive that hasn’t done something that they deeply regret.
Sobriety and recovery provides a process for us to find a healthy place for those regrets - solidly in our past. Forgiving ourselves is part of that process.
I hope that the support, understanding and encouragement that you will find here helps you find sobriety, recovery and self-forgiveness.
Alcoholism is a terrible disease. I believe that there isn’t a human being alive that hasn’t done something that they deeply regret.
Sobriety and recovery provides a process for us to find a healthy place for those regrets - solidly in our past. Forgiving ourselves is part of that process.
I hope that the support, understanding and encouragement that you will find here helps you find sobriety, recovery and self-forgiveness.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
I'm so sorry. Rough stuff. For many of us parents, it's so painful to think about the pain and confusion we cause our kids.
But you can use that pain you feel and leverage it to find a way to stop for good, for them.
Welcome to SR.
But you can use that pain you feel and leverage it to find a way to stop for good, for them.
Welcome to SR.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Excellent job on the three days!
Alcoholism overrides love or reason.
Stick around here. Make a plan for what you’re going to do when you’re tempted to drink.
I suggest getting rid of all the alcohol in your house.
Avoid drinking activities. Take different paths and avoid places where you used to buy booze.
Post here whenever you’re tempted to drink—it’s important to get the support and reinforcement before you put the glass to your lips.
If you hole off by yourself and try to reason with yourself, you’re almost certainly to drink; but if you expose the temptation to air, then it can evaporate.
It really works!
Alcoholism overrides love or reason.
Stick around here. Make a plan for what you’re going to do when you’re tempted to drink.
I suggest getting rid of all the alcohol in your house.
Avoid drinking activities. Take different paths and avoid places where you used to buy booze.
Post here whenever you’re tempted to drink—it’s important to get the support and reinforcement before you put the glass to your lips.
If you hole off by yourself and try to reason with yourself, you’re almost certainly to drink; but if you expose the temptation to air, then it can evaporate.
It really works!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,782
Welcome to the family. 
My girls were teens when I started drinking and I cringe to think what I put them thru. 
I got sober for good 8 and a half years ago and have 'mended all my fences'. We now get along well and they trust me again.
Develop a plan to stay sober and implement it. Come here if you have the urge to drink so we can talk you out of it.
My girls were teens when I started drinking and I cringe to think what I put them thru. 
I got sober for good 8 and a half years ago and have 'mended all my fences'. We now get along well and they trust me again.
Develop a plan to stay sober and implement it. Come here if you have the urge to drink so we can talk you out of it.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 104
Originally Posted by SoberLeigh 
Welcome to the posting side of SR, NewMe2018. Well done on 3 sober days.
Alcoholism is a terrible disease. I believe that there isn’t a human being alive that hasn’t done something that they deeply regret.
Sobriety and recovery provides a process for us to find a healthy place for those regrets - solidly in our past. Forgiving ourselves is part of that process.
I hope that the support, understanding and encouragement that you will find here helps you find sobriety, recovery and self-forgiveness.
Alcoholism is a terrible disease. I believe that there isn’t a human being alive that hasn’t done something that they deeply regret.
Sobriety and recovery provides a process for us to find a healthy place for those regrets - solidly in our past. Forgiving ourselves is part of that process.
I hope that the support, understanding and encouragement that you will find here helps you find sobriety, recovery and self-forgiveness.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 104
Originally Posted by lessgravity
I'm so sorry. Rough stuff. For many of us parents, it's so painful to think about the pain and confusion we cause our kids.
But you can use that pain you feel and leverage it to find a way to stop for good, for them.
Welcome to SR.
But you can use that pain you feel and leverage it to find a way to stop for good, for them.
Welcome to SR.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,511
3 days sober is a great start!
I know how the shame and guilt can overwhelm, especially for us mothers. But, if you allow that to take hold, it can lead you back to the drinking cycle. Try to believe that you can change and be the person and the mother you want to be.
I know how the shame and guilt can overwhelm, especially for us mothers. But, if you allow that to take hold, it can lead you back to the drinking cycle. Try to believe that you can change and be the person and the mother you want to be.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 104
Originally Posted by Gilmer
Excellent job on the three days!
Alcoholism overrides love or reason.
Stick around here. Make a plan for what you’re going to do when you’re tempted to drink.
I suggest getting rid of all the alcohol in your house.
Avoid drinking activities. Take different paths and avoid places where you used to buy booze.
Post here whenever you’re tempted to drink—it’s important to get the support and reinforcement before you put the glass to your lips.
If you hole off by yourself and try to reason with yourself, you’re almost certainly to drink; but if you expose the temptation to air, then it can evaporate.
It really works!
Alcoholism overrides love or reason.
Stick around here. Make a plan for what you’re going to do when you’re tempted to drink.
I suggest getting rid of all the alcohol in your house.
Avoid drinking activities. Take different paths and avoid places where you used to buy booze.
Post here whenever you’re tempted to drink—it’s important to get the support and reinforcement before you put the glass to your lips.
If you hole off by yourself and try to reason with yourself, you’re almost certainly to drink; but if you expose the temptation to air, then it can evaporate.
It really works!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 104
Originally Posted by least
Welcome to the family. My girls were teens when I started drinking and I cringe to think what I put them thru.
I got sober for good 8 and a half years ago and have 'mended all my fences'. We now get along well and they trust me again.
Develop a plan to stay sober and implement it. Come here if you have the urge to drink so we can talk you out of it.
My girls were teens when I started drinking and I cringe to think what I put them thru. I got sober for good 8 and a half years ago and have 'mended all my fences'. We now get along well and they trust me again.
Develop a plan to stay sober and implement it. Come here if you have the urge to drink so we can talk you out of it.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 104
Originally Posted by Anna
3 days sober is a great start!
I know how the shame and guilt can overwhelm, especially for us mothers. But, if you allow that to take hold, it can lead you back to the drinking cycle. Try to believe that you can change and be the person and the mother you want to be.
I know how the shame and guilt can overwhelm, especially for us mothers. But, if you allow that to take hold, it can lead you back to the drinking cycle. Try to believe that you can change and be the person and the mother you want to be.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 583
Newmw2018
Welcome! Today is a new day. One minute, one hour, one day at a time. Reach out to someone and ask for help.
There are three paths. Locked up, sobered up, or covered up. Alcohol took my former wife/mother to two kids. It's a serious addiction and takes a serious decision with action to overcome.
How bad do you want it? What are you willing to do for it?
Praying for you and your family.
AG
Welcome! Today is a new day. One minute, one hour, one day at a time. Reach out to someone and ask for help.
There are three paths. Locked up, sobered up, or covered up. Alcohol took my former wife/mother to two kids. It's a serious addiction and takes a serious decision with action to overcome.
How bad do you want it? What are you willing to do for it?
Praying for you and your family.
AG
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 104
Originally Posted by AlwaysGrowing
Newmw2018
Welcome! Today is a new day. One minute, one hour, one day at a time. Reach out to someone and ask for help.
There are three paths. Locked up, sobered up, or covered up. Alcohol took my former wife/mother to two kids. It's a serious addiction and takes a serious decision with action to overcome.
How bad do you want it? What are you willing to do for it?
Praying for you and your family.
AG
Welcome! Today is a new day. One minute, one hour, one day at a time. Reach out to someone and ask for help.
There are three paths. Locked up, sobered up, or covered up. Alcohol took my former wife/mother to two kids. It's a serious addiction and takes a serious decision with action to overcome.
How bad do you want it? What are you willing to do for it?
Praying for you and your family.
AG
I'm not sure who to reach out to...again!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 583
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,782
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Nashville, Tennessee
Posts: 348
Hello, Newme2018
I am also the mother of two beautiful sons. As a practicing alcoholic, alcohol was my first love - above my husband, my sons, my career, my family. Anything that got in the way of my drinking had to go. I was having a love affair with alcohol. In sobriety, I've made amends to all of the people I harmed. I hurt them in every imaginable way possible; mentally, emotionally, and financially. They suffered worse than me because they didn't have a bottle to crawl into. I got sober through the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. I attended lots of meetings, read the Big Book, got a sponsor, worked the steps, and by the grace of God I no longer am obsessed with a bottle. I have found a design for living that really works.
Good luck to you.
I am also the mother of two beautiful sons. As a practicing alcoholic, alcohol was my first love - above my husband, my sons, my career, my family. Anything that got in the way of my drinking had to go. I was having a love affair with alcohol. In sobriety, I've made amends to all of the people I harmed. I hurt them in every imaginable way possible; mentally, emotionally, and financially. They suffered worse than me because they didn't have a bottle to crawl into. I got sober through the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. I attended lots of meetings, read the Big Book, got a sponsor, worked the steps, and by the grace of God I no longer am obsessed with a bottle. I have found a design for living that really works.
Good luck to you.
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