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Very bad weekend, sick and have to fess up

Old 05-25-2009, 10:12 AM
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Very bad weekend, sick and have to fess up

I am primarily referring to my treatment program although I may as well here too. Did not do well this weekend. Still not doing well. Between the pit of my stomach being sick and the lump in my throat to hold back the tears, this sucks. Now I have to go in and "process" as it were - process the failure of my friggin life. I just want to get through the day with no surprise visitors to remind me of what an f-up I am. I don't even feel safe sitting in my house. Now the best I can hope for is to maintain some sort of grip and go in and volunteer tomorrow without being too sick. That is the goal for my day. I just want to clean this place up, not get to the point of getting sick, not get the shakes and figure out in my group how to stop these things from happening.

The person I've been involved with - well, he can mention marriage, retirement and soulmate stuff all he wants and then just blow me off for the weekend. Screw 'em. I just don't want him coming over here.

Ok, sorry. I know I blab a lot. I'd like to believe someone gets something out of what I say (as in please do NOT do what I do) or that by saying this I somehow stop what I am doing. Blah blah blah. Sorry and thanks for listening.
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Old 05-25-2009, 11:17 AM
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Stay busy. Cleaning sounds great!
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Old 05-25-2009, 01:08 PM
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Originally Posted by suki44883 View Post
Stay busy. Cleaning sounds great!
Hey, sleeping and a shower works too! Thanks!
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Old 05-25-2009, 01:10 PM
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Well, sure...after a full day of cleaning, you'll be sweaty and tired.
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Old 05-25-2009, 01:16 PM
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Nothing like emerging oneself in the tasks of daily living to bring about a new perspective and clean house .
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Old 05-25-2009, 01:19 PM
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That's true, Zen. Since my daughter has gone to live elsewhere, I found myself with a 3 day weekend and no plans. So, I decided to stay busy and started cleaning. Only thing about that is, once one thing is clean, it makes something else look dirty, so...one thing leads to another and here it is Monday and my entire house is sparkling clean! I do feel tired but very satisfied.
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Old 05-25-2009, 03:37 PM
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I've had a spiritual cleaning of sorts - remembering who I am, dammit! I am a fighter and always have been, and always will be. (Ok, Katie trying to convince herself )
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Old 05-25-2009, 04:47 PM
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Originally Posted by suki44883 View Post
That's true, Zen. Since my daughter has gone to live elsewhere, I found myself with a 3 day weekend and no plans. So, I decided to stay busy and started cleaning. Only thing about that is, once one thing is clean, it makes something else look dirty, so...one thing leads to another and here it is Monday and my entire house is sparkling clean! I do feel tired but very satisfied.
During some of my toughest times a good ole healthy diversion worked well for me. I had taken on the task of learning a 'division overlay' for my MySpace profile. I spent way too many hours (days actually ) to learn it but it kept my mind off those things that would bring me harm.
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Old 05-25-2009, 04:59 PM
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Some times we just have to "Chop wood, Carry water" to get through. I've had times I actually arranged the spice rack in ABC order and scrubbed the grout with a toothbrush!

Love,

Lenina
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Old 05-25-2009, 06:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Lenina View Post
Some times we just have to "Chop wood, Carry water" to get through. I've had times I actually arranged the spice rack in ABC order and scrubbed the grout with a toothbrush!

Love,

Lenina
Hmmm, and what I did was to eat mashed potatoes, lol, that worked too although nearly not as productive as you.
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Old 05-25-2009, 06:15 PM
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Originally Posted by Katie09 View Post
I've had a spiritual cleaning of sorts
OMK, Katie.. you're gonna have to go to another forum with that kind of talk. I can't believe this is coming from you...



I worked on some speakers and washed the exterior of my car. Now I'm washing some towels.
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Old 05-25-2009, 06:57 PM
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Originally Posted by doorknob View Post
OMK, Katie.. you're gonna have to go to another forum with that kind of talk. I can't believe this is coming from you...



I worked on some speakers and washed the exterior of my car. Now I'm washing some towels.

OMKD! LOL!!! Katie's version of spiritual cleaning:

Katie calls jerk: no answer

Katies tells jerk that there is an official problem in that Katie has been blown off for ANOTHER holiday weekend: no reaction, as Katie is leaving a voice mail.

Katie hangs up phone and is *still* pissed, wondering why this guy gets away with it and vowing to never let it happen again.

Hope your car is all shiny and clean.
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Old 05-25-2009, 07:07 PM
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Originally Posted by Katie09 View Post
Hope your car is all shiny and clean.
It looks okay from a distance...



But, it badly needs to be vacuumed and have the dog slobber removed from the rear windows.

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Old 05-25-2009, 07:15 PM
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Originally Posted by doorknob View Post
It looks okay from a distance...



But, it badly needs to be vacuumed and have the dog slobber removed from the rear windows.

LOL, I did run mine through the wash today. Needs to be vacuumed as well. I do have a little vacuum but am just too durn lazy to go out there and do it. Plus, I am going to blame my lack of energy on the heat. It is hot here, but the truth is it just hasn't been a good weekend. The only thing I hate worse than holidays are being alone on holidays and even THAT is superceded by having some jerk in my life who makes me realize just HOW alone I am. Wah, wha, wha.............. But car does look good
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Old 05-25-2009, 07:22 PM
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Originally Posted by Katie09 View Post
I do have a little vacuum but am just too durn lazy to go out there and do it. :wtf2
We've got a full sized shop vac now, but I still haven't used it on my car. I really hate vacuuming dog hair. It just hangs on for dear life...
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Old 05-25-2009, 07:23 PM
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Katie, since you are a fighter, the best thing that comes to my mind is to pick your battles???????
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Old 05-25-2009, 07:43 PM
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Originally Posted by liveweyerd View Post
Katie, since you are a fighter, the best thing that comes to my mind is to pick your battles???????
Yes, but these holidays truly ARE deal breakers to me. This is the second time around for us and I am just not going back in time and all that implies. Believe me, I was gentle compared to what I *REALLY* wanted to say. I merely told him we have an *official* problem. Like he cares. I dunno. He is going to have to go anyway. Was always a huge trigger and continues to be. I think I'll tell him to come on family/friends night which is Thursday. If he cares, he will. If he doesn't, he doesn't. Thanks
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Old 05-25-2009, 07:47 PM
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That seems like a worthwhile cause, Katie.......

I didn't pick my battles today to be cleaning ones!! LOL
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Old 05-25-2009, 07:54 PM
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Originally Posted by liveweyerd View Post
That seems like a worthwhile cause, Katie.......

I didn't pick my battles today to be cleaning ones!! LOL
Thanks and :ghug Tomorrow morning is where I get the good stuff. I get to go volunteer. Each time I do so, someone there (one of the recipients) just makes my day. They say something that just makes me go...WOW! I am really blessed (sorry DK )
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Old 05-25-2009, 07:54 PM
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At least the bad weekend is over now. My 6 year old has bad days sometimes, and I always tell her, "the the best thing to do with a bad day is end it" and then I give her a big smooch and put her to bed. I'm not gonna smooch you butgo to sleep and call your bad weekend officially over.

~Daisy
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