Weekenders - ‘Elephant in the room’ 25-28 June 2021
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,345
OMG
🐘
It’s me. I was the elephant.
I STILL STRUGGLE WITH BEING THE ELEPHANT.
I entered a pothole this weekend on my sobriety pathway and took a bad detour.
I’m sad, mad, ashamed (a little). Also hopeful and excited that I’ve been blessed with today.
Moving forward and only glancing back. Books on habit changing, remembering how I approached quitting cigs. I expected the waves. I dodged them in creative ways.
I did chop wood and carry water on the sober path for over a year three years ago.
I CAN DO THIS
🐘
It’s me. I was the elephant.
I STILL STRUGGLE WITH BEING THE ELEPHANT.
I entered a pothole this weekend on my sobriety pathway and took a bad detour.
I’m sad, mad, ashamed (a little). Also hopeful and excited that I’ve been blessed with today.
Moving forward and only glancing back. Books on habit changing, remembering how I approached quitting cigs. I expected the waves. I dodged them in creative ways.
I did chop wood and carry water on the sober path for over a year three years ago.
I CAN DO THIS
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,464
You don't need to share what happened but I hope you work through why you decided to drink again Free.
I had to get to a point where my commitment to sobriety was not dependent on situations people or feelings...it was iron clad.
using support, before I drank, was a major factor in that iron clad commitment.
D
I had to get to a point where my commitment to sobriety was not dependent on situations people or feelings...it was iron clad.
using support, before I drank, was a major factor in that iron clad commitment.
D
Magsie
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,695
Free, when I had a drink after 8 months sober, I thought I could be a normal drinker. But I steadily went back to my binge drinking. From what I’ve learnt from SR and looking back I realised I’d given in to the AV and it got stronger the more I drank. Crunch time came, nearly 8 years ago when booze was ruining my life and I stopped.
Heck, I’d stopped but didn’t know how to live without it. If you know what I mean. It was like putting me behind the wheel of a juggernaut and not being able to drive it. I was helpless. I could’ve got down from the drivers seat and given in. But no, this time I learnt how to drive, how to live day by day steering my life, living without booze.
I collected many ‘sober tools’ for my journey as I’d learnt there could be bumps and potholes along the way.
Eventually I learnt to ‘drive’ on the road skilfully and solidly with my sober tools by my side, I won’t be lost anymore.
I know you can do this and find the road that works for you. Making a commitment that we don’t drink and then following it through with the tools and knowledge needed. It really works.
Heck, I’d stopped but didn’t know how to live without it. If you know what I mean. It was like putting me behind the wheel of a juggernaut and not being able to drive it. I was helpless. I could’ve got down from the drivers seat and given in. But no, this time I learnt how to drive, how to live day by day steering my life, living without booze.
I collected many ‘sober tools’ for my journey as I’d learnt there could be bumps and potholes along the way.
Eventually I learnt to ‘drive’ on the road skilfully and solidly with my sober tools by my side, I won’t be lost anymore.
I know you can do this and find the road that works for you. Making a commitment that we don’t drink and then following it through with the tools and knowledge needed. It really works.
Magsie
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,695
Good Morning Weekenders
Bim, hope you and Kitty had a restful night.
I’m getting prepared for our heatwave, we usually follow your weather a week or so later.
A shout @MantaLady @MidnightBlue @lunar @SnoozyQ @MesaMan (think you’re on holiday
) 
Thinking of you and hoping all is well. There are more names to add on and hopefully other Weekenders will help me out.
Raining here or so my cat said when she shook her fur at me.
See you in a bit. xxxx
Bim, hope you and Kitty had a restful night.
I’m getting prepared for our heatwave, we usually follow your weather a week or so later. A shout @MantaLady @MidnightBlue @lunar @SnoozyQ @MesaMan (think you’re on holiday
) Thinking of you and hoping all is well. There are more names to add on and hopefully other Weekenders will help me out.
Raining here or so my cat said when she shook her fur at me.
See you in a bit. xxxx
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,207
I'm glad that you posted Free2bme, you can definitely take something out of a relapse and avoid having another one. Also, all those months of sobriety are not wasted as they are evidence that you can do this.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,062
And @theVman31 too.
I think there is a football game or something on today.
I am getting some snuggles today.
I think there is a football game or something on today.
I am getting some snuggles today.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: US
Posts: 16,915
Kaily do you go on Youtube? I use a lot of their guided meditation videos for recharging, protection from negative energies, anxiety relief, etc....something you may want to try if you get some quiet time.....
Sheesh, I hope you all get a break from the brutal heat!
Give kitty a hug for me Bim
Sheesh, I hope you all get a break from the brutal heat!
Give kitty a hug for me Bim
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Oh, Glorious cool breeze. How I've missed thee. It got up to 108* (42C) according to the weather app on my phone. Usually I would lock down the condo for bed. Nope. All the windows flung open at 9PM when it was still 98*F (37C) and I went to bed with the fan on speed #3 propped in the window. I was practically asking for trouble!
No trouble here. It's lovely and it feels like winter at 72* (22C) YAY. It's 3:30 AM and I'm up and going to enjoy it. Still gonna be hot today, not as hot.
Kitty survived. She didn't like getting soaked in the sink five times, but it was for her own good. She ate overnight~! Thanks for the support yesterday.
Free2, back at it, yes?
No trouble here. It's lovely and it feels like winter at 72* (22C) YAY. It's 3:30 AM and I'm up and going to enjoy it. Still gonna be hot today, not as hot.
Kitty survived. She didn't like getting soaked in the sink five times, but it was for her own good. She ate overnight~! Thanks for the support yesterday.
Free2, back at it, yes?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,426
Daisy's toenails look nicely trimmed. From all that walking perhaps?
Bimini, that sounds awfully hot. I hope it swings back soon. The first time we went to Seattle to visit wife's sister, they had near record cool and then hot weather while we were there. It hasn't been that hot here, but the stifling humidity makes me not even want to go out.
Free, I hope that you can regroup. Now, I feel like all those years of drinking were such a tremendous waste.
Bimini, that sounds awfully hot. I hope it swings back soon. The first time we went to Seattle to visit wife's sister, they had near record cool and then hot weather while we were there. It hasn't been that hot here, but the stifling humidity makes me not even want to go out.
Free, I hope that you can regroup. Now, I feel like all those years of drinking were such a tremendous waste.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,062
Thanks for the suggestion Purps, I am not a meditation kinda girl, I have tried but I just don't relax at all. Walking helps me the most.
Daisy's toenails are a work in progress, Cityboy. When she came to live with me they were very overgrown. I take a bit off, little and often as she finds it all a bit worrying. That and lots of walking of course.
She is becoming quite a bossy little madam.
I'm glad things are better today, Bim.
Daisy's toenails are a work in progress, Cityboy. When she came to live with me they were very overgrown. I take a bit off, little and often as she finds it all a bit worrying. That and lots of walking of course.
She is becoming quite a bossy little madam.
I'm glad things are better today, Bim.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,207
Daisy looks a lot more relaxed than I am with the football now looming in to full view. I tend to go in to full Eeyore mode to avoid getting my hopes up.
btw, for anyone suffering from excess heat a colleague from another company is in Iraq. Tomorrow's forecast is for 50°C (122F)
btw, for anyone suffering from excess heat a colleague from another company is in Iraq. Tomorrow's forecast is for 50°C (122F)
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,474
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Hey Troopz ~
Welp, in the paraphrased words of the inimitable Jerry Garcia: 'What a [short] strange Trip it's been'. I rolled into Home around Sundown yesterday after a Personal Best of towing 500 Miles over 12 Hours. Breaks and Gas Stop in there, too. At one point, we all had to wait for this way massive set of Industrial Tanks to pass by on a very specialized Semi Truck Convoy. Mebbe for one of the Copper Mines in the area.
On Trip Day 2 last Tuesday in the blazing Mountain Heat of Nevada on a Highway known as 'The Loneliest Highway In The U.S.', I pulled over to see 1 of 2 newly-mounted Solar Panels on the Trailer Roof was about to come off. The pricey Steel Racking Kit I used couldn't take the Wind Load; despite being specified for RV use. Meanwhile, I've used 28 Gallons [106 Liters] of Gas to go 135 Miles [217 Km] in ferocious Headwinds. Only carrying an extra 5 Gallons for my never-used Electricity Generator saved my Booty. I got my collapsible Ladder off the Bumper, and used MesaPup's coated Cable to secure the Steel Rack bent up at a 45 Degree Angle from flat. 2 other Solar Collectors back on the Luggage Rack have done fine for Years. The sloped Trailer Front 'Prow' caused radical uplift in the Wind under the front Solar Panel. Wind that caused me to get a new *low* of 2 Miles/Gallon while pulling one of several Mountain Grades.
I limped into Mining Town Ely Nevada, and put up for 5 Days at the best RV Park in Town. Nice Joint, actually, and I landed a prime spot at a Row end near the Dog Park. This was fortuitous cuz Rattlesnakes would be around on Trails. Once I developed a Plan, the repair took me only a Day intermittently. Ya can't plug/unplug energized Solar Panels, so I was up working [quietly] well before Sunrise. Get the Solar Panel off and stored under the Trailer. Hacksaw off the bent Steel Racks. Reconnect, test, and secure everything. I was plugged in to RV Park Power, so some of this work was optional. Everything held just fine yesterday on the drive back, so I'll get with a different mounting scheme further back on the Trailer Roof. Live & Learn.
SOOOO, I got potentially-deadly *stuff* coming off the Roof in a howling Wind. It's pushing 100 F [38 C] Degrees, I'm running out of Gas. I got nowhere to stay in this nutso RV Travel period one Pundit called 'Revenge Travel'. One RV Neighbor told me every Hotel Room in Town was booked. 'Murica is getting out with a vengeance. For me, there was no panic. No upset. No Future Fretting. No Second Guessing on the Panel mounting stuff I'd bought. I was out the Money. So what? Ya just gotta roll with it. My Time Machine to turn back Time to pre-catastrophe is in the Repair Shop.
Thanks Sobriety! And, thanks, Mags, from the former Elephant In The Room. I learned several new tricks this Trip. The intended destination of finding Grandpa's old Log Cabin in California Gold Mining Country will happen some other time.
Vibes sent forth for all my fellow Pet Owners. They complete us.
'Ghost Rock' on Interstate 70 yesterday...
Hey Troopz ~
Welp, in the paraphrased words of the inimitable Jerry Garcia: 'What a [short] strange Trip it's been'. I rolled into Home around Sundown yesterday after a Personal Best of towing 500 Miles over 12 Hours. Breaks and Gas Stop in there, too. At one point, we all had to wait for this way massive set of Industrial Tanks to pass by on a very specialized Semi Truck Convoy. Mebbe for one of the Copper Mines in the area.
On Trip Day 2 last Tuesday in the blazing Mountain Heat of Nevada on a Highway known as 'The Loneliest Highway In The U.S.', I pulled over to see 1 of 2 newly-mounted Solar Panels on the Trailer Roof was about to come off. The pricey Steel Racking Kit I used couldn't take the Wind Load; despite being specified for RV use. Meanwhile, I've used 28 Gallons [106 Liters] of Gas to go 135 Miles [217 Km] in ferocious Headwinds. Only carrying an extra 5 Gallons for my never-used Electricity Generator saved my Booty. I got my collapsible Ladder off the Bumper, and used MesaPup's coated Cable to secure the Steel Rack bent up at a 45 Degree Angle from flat. 2 other Solar Collectors back on the Luggage Rack have done fine for Years. The sloped Trailer Front 'Prow' caused radical uplift in the Wind under the front Solar Panel. Wind that caused me to get a new *low* of 2 Miles/Gallon while pulling one of several Mountain Grades.
I limped into Mining Town Ely Nevada, and put up for 5 Days at the best RV Park in Town. Nice Joint, actually, and I landed a prime spot at a Row end near the Dog Park. This was fortuitous cuz Rattlesnakes would be around on Trails. Once I developed a Plan, the repair took me only a Day intermittently. Ya can't plug/unplug energized Solar Panels, so I was up working [quietly] well before Sunrise. Get the Solar Panel off and stored under the Trailer. Hacksaw off the bent Steel Racks. Reconnect, test, and secure everything. I was plugged in to RV Park Power, so some of this work was optional. Everything held just fine yesterday on the drive back, so I'll get with a different mounting scheme further back on the Trailer Roof. Live & Learn.
SOOOO, I got potentially-deadly *stuff* coming off the Roof in a howling Wind. It's pushing 100 F [38 C] Degrees, I'm running out of Gas. I got nowhere to stay in this nutso RV Travel period one Pundit called 'Revenge Travel'. One RV Neighbor told me every Hotel Room in Town was booked. 'Murica is getting out with a vengeance. For me, there was no panic. No upset. No Future Fretting. No Second Guessing on the Panel mounting stuff I'd bought. I was out the Money. So what? Ya just gotta roll with it. My Time Machine to turn back Time to pre-catastrophe is in the Repair Shop.
Thanks Sobriety! And, thanks, Mags, from the former Elephant In The Room. I learned several new tricks this Trip. The intended destination of finding Grandpa's old Log Cabin in California Gold Mining Country will happen some other time.
Vibes sent forth for all my fellow Pet Owners. They complete us.
'Ghost Rock' on Interstate 70 yesterday...
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