Blogs


Notices

Purgatory?

Old 12-13-2017, 10:43 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 28
Thanks Scott. I have no alcohol in the house.. I just know the wife and kids are coming home. I've already drank a 5th... AND, I have to go to a therapist with all of them. Any ideas?
Swoiblelr is offline  
Old 12-13-2017, 10:44 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 28
Be honest? Not sure it works right now... Not looking to blow up my whole family today..
Swoiblelr is offline  
Old 12-13-2017, 10:45 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 53,717
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
You start by taking whatever alcohol is in your hand or your house and dumping it down the drain. Once that's done log back on here and we can help you through the next step.
Exactly!

As others have mentioned, reading the BigBook, going to meetings, seeing a therapist - these are all tools, but you still need to take the action necessary to not drink. Get rid of the alcohol in your house, don't buy anymore today, get through each hour or each minute doing whatever it takes. We are here for you.
Anna is online now  
The Following User Says Thank You to Anna For This Useful Post:
least (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 10:46 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
Member
 
tomsteve's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by Swoiblelr View Post
Can you imagine an addiction that you're child has said to you "Please" stop drinking, and you do it anyway...

I'm at a loss to understand what is going on..
yes, i can. i drank for many years after hearing that from my son.
it reads like what is going on is untreated alcoholism.
as for how i got and have remained sober, it started with a gift- the gift of desperation. then i surrendered- i admitted alcohol kicked my ass.
then i got into AA. i became willing to go to ANY lengths for victory over alcohol. then worked the steps.
every promise of the steps has materialized, including these ones:
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone - even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.
tomsteve is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to tomsteve For This Useful Post:
biminiblue (12-13-2017), Done4today (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 10:49 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 1,044
You probably are not nearly as good an actor as you think you are. We have an alcoholic in our shop, he drinks daily, once he came in on a Friday and told me he had drank a lot the night before with his adult son. I have never found anything more repulsive in my life. There are days I cannot get within 5 feet of him, because he stinks. I am sure he showered, but he reeks. Alcohol does something to your body chemistry and that putrid smell leeches out of your pores. I was always afraid of it. I remember my ex husband one time, coimng off a bad bender where he claimed I gave him food poisoning, he stunk like ammonia.
I could tell within the first minute on the phone, if he was drunk, sober or would be passed out by the time I got home. (Usually when he said "Hello").

Poor it all out, you are not fooling anyone, I have never seen a good drunk actor, if you are "acting" sober, then you are wasting your family and therapist's time.

Pour it out and go to the hospital. I am not a pharmacist, but that combination of drugs is not good, especially not with copious amounts of booze. Go to the psych ward, tell them you are a danger to yourself. When you feel better, read the immortal alcoholic and the Friends and Family section of this board, then think about your actions and whether picking up a drink is really the thing you want to do. Around the world, the mental health systems suck, there is no nice way to put it, therefore, you must become your own advocate.
MyLittleHorsie is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to MyLittleHorsie For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017), DreamCatcher17 (12-13-2017), mnjen (12-13-2017), whopper (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 10:51 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 28
Thanks Tom - Big book stuff.. I appreciate your struggle and applaud you for being better..

It's Wednesday, my kids will be home in an hour. I'm drunk... I keep playing this actor, it's very tiring.. Concerned about tonight. Wife is not happy....
Swoiblelr is offline  
Old 12-13-2017, 10:57 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 28
My Little Horse -

Thank you for you're reply.. I was a the doctor yesterday. He told me, I would never suspect you as having an issue. You don't look like it, you don't smell like it, etc....

I'm an alcoholic. The only people that know is because I/we tell them. Doesn't male me better than the guy guy in the street. I'm an alcoholic and just haven't hit rock bottom "yet"..

Thanks for the reply..
Swoiblelr is offline  
Old 12-13-2017, 11:03 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
Member
 
biminiblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 20,072
Your "bottom" can be anytime you want. Bottom is when you stop digging, yeah?

Now would be good.
biminiblue is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to biminiblue For This Useful Post:
Berrybean (12-13-2017), DarklingSong (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:04 AM
  # 29 (permalink)  
Member
 
DreamCatcher17's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 1,433
I never wanted to wait until "rock-bottom" that sounds terrible. To me that would be losing everything I have worked so hard for such as;
My son
My job- I own a business where I need a clean record.
My house
My car
and so on.

Everyone has a different rock bottom and that is what I pictured mine to be and I wanted to be sober before any of that ever had an opportunity to be relevant in my life.
DreamCatcher17 is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to DreamCatcher17 For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017), JustTony (12-14-2017), least (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:05 AM
  # 30 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 28
Nothing?

Show comes on in 30 minutes... I'm "one of you"..

Honestly, I don't want to be.. However, I respect the hell out of each one of you that have been able to navigate through this.
Swoiblelr is offline  
Old 12-13-2017, 11:06 AM
  # 31 (permalink)  
Member
 
Done4today's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: CA
Posts: 1,060
Originally Posted by Swoiblelr View Post
My Little Horse -

Thank you for you're reply.. I was a the doctor yesterday. He told me, I would never suspect you as having an issue. You don't look like it, you don't smell like it, etc....

I'm an alcoholic. The only people that know is because I/we tell them. Doesn't male me better than the guy guy in the street. I'm an alcoholic and just haven't hit rock bottom "yet"..

Thanks for the reply..
Bottom is where we put the shovel down.

How do you know you're alcoholic?

Why do you want to go further down the rabbit hole?

FYI, librium is really hard on your liver. Look for jaundice (yellowing in your eyes and skin).

Good luck bud, we are all pulling for you. We all know the struggle and have battled the beast as you are.
Done4today is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to Done4today For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:07 AM
  # 32 (permalink)  
Forum Leader
 
ScottFromWI's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,173
Originally Posted by Swoiblelr View Post
Be honest? Not sure it works right now... Not looking to blow up my whole family today..
I can't really see that you have any other options at this point, can you? You are already drunk, so you can either

A: Be honest with your wife and get a ride to the therapist.

B. Lie about it and keep on as you've been keeping on.

Do you see another choice I'm not seeing? It will "blow up" your family eventually if you do nothing, so why not cut your losses where they are and just take responsibility for your actions? From what I see things are already blown up by you putting yourself in this mess. You won't be the first nor the last...i've been there before too and most of us have. But you do hold the keys to change - you just have to use them.
ScottFromWI is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to ScottFromWI For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017), Berrybean (12-13-2017), Done4today (12-13-2017), DreamCatcher17 (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017), mnjen (12-13-2017), tomsteve (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:08 AM
  # 33 (permalink)  
Hears The Voice
 
Nonsensical's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,629
Blog Entries: 20
Originally Posted by Swoiblelr View Post
Can you imagine an addiction that you're child has said to you "Please" stop drinking, and you do it anyway...
I don't have to imagine it. I lived it.

I waited 25 years for a magical lightening bolt to streak down from the heavens and miracle my a$$ sober. It never happened. Making a plan and working a plan produced much better results.

Make the plan.
Work the plan.
Expect discomfort.
Find better ways to deal with the discomfort.
Persevere.
You can do this.
Nonsensical is offline  
The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to Nonsensical For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017), Berrybean (12-13-2017), Bird615 (12-14-2017), DarklingSong (12-13-2017), Done4today (12-13-2017), DreamCatcher17 (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017), mnjen (12-13-2017), WeaverBird (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:13 AM
  # 34 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 28
Scott - I IM'd you. You may be able to help me..
Swoiblelr is offline  
Old 12-13-2017, 11:18 AM
  # 35 (permalink)  
bona fido dog-lover
 
least's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: eastern USA
Posts: 84,763
Blog Entries: 32
Pour out the alcohol, stop drinking, and come clean to your family about your drinking. I thought I was fooling my kids but they knew I was drinking.
least is online now  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to least For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017), DarklingSong (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:31 AM
  # 36 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 28
Wow - I'm drunk. I;m going to try and figure this out. Nobody likes me in my life right now. I;m going to say this, not to brag, but show alcohol affects everybody.. My earnings last year were 300K... I'm an alcoholic looking for help..
Swoiblelr is offline  
The Following User Says Thank You to Swoiblelr For This Useful Post:
Strugglingtoget (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:33 AM
  # 37 (permalink)  
Member
 
DreamCatcher17's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 1,433
Originally Posted by Swoiblelr View Post
Wow - I'm drunk. I;m going to try and figure this out. Nobody likes me in my life right now. I;m going to say this, not to brag, but show alcohol affects everybody.. My earnings last year were 300K... I'm an alcoholic looking for help..
I would hate to see your addiction take that away, what a life changer that would be for your family.
DreamCatcher17 is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to DreamCatcher17 For This Useful Post:
DarklingSong (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:37 AM
  # 38 (permalink)  
Member
 
Done4today's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: CA
Posts: 1,060
Originally Posted by Swoiblelr View Post
Wow - I'm drunk. I;m going to try and figure this out.
You don't need to do this on your own. Surrender, ask for help and do as you're told. Once you figure out that you can't do it alone, then you'll be able to change.
Done4today is offline  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Done4today For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017), DreamCatcher17 (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017), MyLittleHorsie (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 11:47 AM
  # 39 (permalink)  
Member
 
Awake61's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: Portland maine
Posts: 1,191
my family knew, everyone knew. it took losing my job, my license, respect of my children and an attempt at suicide and then I realized I wanted to live. Live sober. It gets a bit better every day. Grateful here for SR.
Awake61 is online now  
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Awake61 For This Useful Post:
DarklingSong (12-13-2017), Done4today (12-13-2017), DreamCatcher17 (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017)
Old 12-13-2017, 12:01 PM
  # 40 (permalink)  
Member
 
tomsteve's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by Swoiblelr View Post
Thanks Tom - Big book stuff.. I appreciate your struggle and applaud you for being better..
.
oh, i dont have ANY struggle any more and its been a few years since i had a struggle.
getting sober was a serious struggle- the mental obsession was quite strong. but i fought for LIFE. i went to meetings, read the big book, prayed,worked the steps,didnt drink even when my ass fell off, repeat.
staying sober has been easy and worth ever single second of struggle/fight.
youre looking for help and youve been given many suggestions. balls in your court now- its up to you to do the actions
tomsteve is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to tomsteve For This Useful Post:
Awake61 (12-13-2017), Bird615 (12-14-2017), DarklingSong (12-13-2017), least (12-13-2017), WeaverBird (12-13-2017)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:38 PM.