I can see clearly now weekender November 13
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Marty, I love what you wrote. I call myself an alcoholic in AA meetings but it really is all about a life with different, better choices. Once the shock of not drinking leaves the system.
Brain, that was great. Thank you. A good friend of mine from high school is having a hysterectomy in December. I didn't know until recently. The look on my face was apparently not good as she said " it'll be OK. I'm not worried. " I need to call her because I'm not worried either. The look on my face was of deep sadness at the shock that I don't know what's going on in her life much anymore. That I've drifted so far from the true friends I had. Making new friends is rough. Treasure the ones you have.
Downtown on the train today. Yes!
Brain, that was great. Thank you. A good friend of mine from high school is having a hysterectomy in December. I didn't know until recently. The look on my face was apparently not good as she said " it'll be OK. I'm not worried. " I need to call her because I'm not worried either. The look on my face was of deep sadness at the shock that I don't know what's going on in her life much anymore. That I've drifted so far from the true friends I had. Making new friends is rough. Treasure the ones you have.
Downtown on the train today. Yes!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Mangetout:
Also known as the snow or sugar pea, mangetout are a flat-podded variety of pea, eaten whole while the peas within are still very small – hence the French name.
sao. Why couldn't you eat a whole one? Or is this another colloquialism?
Also known as the snow or sugar pea, mangetout are a flat-podded variety of pea, eaten whole while the peas within are still very small – hence the French name.
sao. Why couldn't you eat a whole one? Or is this another colloquialism?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 2,393
I want to say this...yet it is difficult to put these words here. I really have one true friend. One. One that had never walked away. One that my neglect did not extinguish. One I love unconditionally and from whom I received the same. One that I had never cut to the quick. We'd been closest friends for more than 40 years, but in May of this year I did it. I tore it. She is still my one friend, but is don't think she would refer to me the same way now. We don't speak. I don't speak because I am mortified and can't figure out how to make it right. I don't know why she doesn't speak, but I think she has finally had it, and has moved on.
I don't need anything in particular in response, but I think saying this is part of "seeing clearly" for me, and of counting the cost of having my head up my azz.
I don't need anything in particular in response, but I think saying this is part of "seeing clearly" for me, and of counting the cost of having my head up my azz.
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 3,010
Day 11 of Gratitude Challenge:
Today I am grateful for those who let their freak flag fly high without shame! The square pegs who refuse to fit into any round holes. Those who take the taunts of others and refuse to be reduced by them. In fact shine even brighter for them.
Square peg…round hole. Story of my life.
What is fitting in anyway? You have to drown yourself enough to be palatable to other people? No thank you. I’d rather not. I’d rather live out loud, fiercely, fearlessly and let the chips fall where they may. Because you never know when tomorrow might be your last one. Because I want to live my life on purpose. Not as a reaction to events, but rather as a force all my own.
Conforming to standards other people have drags down free spirits. It suffocates them. I spent far too many years in stifling agony to ever try that again. Up is the only direction this free spirit knows anymore.
Fitting in means molding yourself to others standards…not yours.
“Tone it down” “Calm down…”Don’t be so…you”.
Never.
Never again will I tone it down, calm down or not be me.
Fitting in robs you of your magic.
We are all born with a selective amount of magic. The ironic thing is that most of us waste it on trying to “fit in” …so we lose it. We see glimpses of our lost magic in falling stars, full moons and moments that make our hearts feel whole. But that’s the thing…we still lose it…if we aren’t careful.
I am blessed by those who challenge me to live without fear of being judged and to revel in my innate weirdness because it’s fun, it’s me and less boring. Why fit in when you were born to stand out? Let those freak flags fly!
Today I am grateful for those who let their freak flag fly high without shame! The square pegs who refuse to fit into any round holes. Those who take the taunts of others and refuse to be reduced by them. In fact shine even brighter for them.
Square peg…round hole. Story of my life.
What is fitting in anyway? You have to drown yourself enough to be palatable to other people? No thank you. I’d rather not. I’d rather live out loud, fiercely, fearlessly and let the chips fall where they may. Because you never know when tomorrow might be your last one. Because I want to live my life on purpose. Not as a reaction to events, but rather as a force all my own.
Conforming to standards other people have drags down free spirits. It suffocates them. I spent far too many years in stifling agony to ever try that again. Up is the only direction this free spirit knows anymore.
Fitting in means molding yourself to others standards…not yours.
“Tone it down” “Calm down…”Don’t be so…you”.
Never.
Never again will I tone it down, calm down or not be me.
Fitting in robs you of your magic.
We are all born with a selective amount of magic. The ironic thing is that most of us waste it on trying to “fit in” …so we lose it. We see glimpses of our lost magic in falling stars, full moons and moments that make our hearts feel whole. But that’s the thing…we still lose it…if we aren’t careful.
I am blessed by those who challenge me to live without fear of being judged and to revel in my innate weirdness because it’s fun, it’s me and less boring. Why fit in when you were born to stand out? Let those freak flags fly!
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
my apologies.. I didn't mean to come across as condescending or woe is me in my last post... just that - treasure those you have and I'm glad I found this place. You all are my friends, or as I tell my wife, you are my people...
so I didn't feel like reading the entire menu at coastal [whatever it is] and just ordered the fish and chips, sister got salmon with a mango salsa and snow peas or sugar snap peas - the thick ones. After second guessing myself, I should have had THAT instead. Those peas were delish...
a couple songs that have always resonated with me...
I finally found a heart of gold
so I didn't feel like reading the entire menu at coastal [whatever it is] and just ordered the fish and chips, sister got salmon with a mango salsa and snow peas or sugar snap peas - the thick ones. After second guessing myself, I should have had THAT instead. Those peas were delish...
a couple songs that have always resonated with me...
I finally found a heart of gold
One Day At A Time
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 2,054
From LB, MM, and Mex
Sobriety is an art,
not for the timid.
^^^love this.
Friends.....really been thinking about this very subject as of late. On Saturday I'll have 6 months of sobriety, God willing. No coincidence I'm sure, that of my 8-10 'friends', i.e. girls- night-out-wine-crowd, only one have I seen since the last dinner. This is the dinner that, when I ordered sparkling water instead of wine, brought an onslaught of questions and remarks of disbelief. A literal hush fell across the crowd when I said I believed I had a drinking problem, and therefore would no longer be drinking. "Forever? Yes, forever". (pin drop)
Meh.
One Day At A Time
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 2,054
https://youtu.be/H6otmy3DAK8
I can't figure out how to put the video below, so here's a link. I love it, so fun!
I can't figure out how to put the video below, so here's a link. I love it, so fun!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
'Man, get out'
In what context, Mesa?
Dharma, that's rough but I'm glad that you have one friend sticking by you. I never had a huge posse of wine friends. I'm not looking to join those crowds now either. But it's tough that you find out who your friends really are when you say "I'm not going to be drinking anymore." Pooh on them!
One of my wine friends died at the age of 40. Her second esophageal hemorrhage. I'm pretty sure that she was an alcoholic. Sadly, I continued to drink after that.
In what context, Mesa?
Dharma, that's rough but I'm glad that you have one friend sticking by you. I never had a huge posse of wine friends. I'm not looking to join those crowds now either. But it's tough that you find out who your friends really are when you say "I'm not going to be drinking anymore." Pooh on them!
One of my wine friends died at the age of 40. Her second esophageal hemorrhage. I'm pretty sure that she was an alcoholic. Sadly, I continued to drink after that.
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