Checked out my first "in person" meeting tonight... - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 10-13-2009, 05:29 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Checked out my first "in person" meeting tonight...


Hey again. Came pretty close to drinking again over the weekend and spent last night researching local AA groups to try out my first "in person" meeting.

It went smoothly enough, in the back of a small local church. Drove by at first (about 15 minutes early) and it didn't look like anyone was around. Kept on driving, turned around a few miles up and drove past to see some folks arriving in the downpour.

Parked, almost didn't walk in, but ended up deciding to. Mixed group of people in terms of ages: mostly guys tonight, though there were a few ladies (including the meeting leader). Also a couple of other "newcomers", though overall I was probably the third youngest in attendance. As such we had a newcomers' meeting. A few of the stories sounded somewhat similar to my own.

Along with the other newcomers, I spoke briefly at the end and gave a brief backstory and reason for coming (I want to quit drinking). They handed out copies of the Big Book, which was kind of surprising. Gave me a white chip as well.

Only thing that bugged me was the end when they gathered around to do the Lord's prayer, but when in Rome. I don't plan on going the "90 meetings in 90 days" route as I hope to be sober for way more than 90 days, but I've got something new to read, a whole lot of phone numbers, and a high probability of checking out another meeting tomorrow as long as my work schedule allows.
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Old 10-13-2009, 05:35 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Oh Donne I am so glad you went! I would say try other meetings too. It took me awhile to find the right one. It is so helpful once you start feeling comfortable and I laugh the entire time I am in mine. There is a lot of old timers in there with lots of sobriety and crazy azz stories. Good for you honey!! Stay sober, one day at a time. When I felt like using that is what I did was found a meeting. It will get easier to go to those meetings and once people start to get to know you it is amazing the love and support you get. GOOD FOR YOU!! MUCH LOVE!
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Old 10-13-2009, 05:38 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Way to go DonneIslanding

On the days you cant make a meeting these sites may be helpful for you

Downloads & mp3's from silkworth.net

XA-Speakers - The lights are on!
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Old 10-13-2009, 05:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
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That is AWESOME!! congrats on your sobriety Donne

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Old 10-13-2009, 05:49 PM   #5 (permalink)
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See... I told you it'd be pretty ok Glad you went, at least if anything else, it's just one more tool in your sobriety toolbox for support!
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Old 10-13-2009, 06:27 PM   #6 (permalink)
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The 90/90 thing has been around for a long time. Some people do it, some don't There are 2 benefits from that schedule. The first is that by going to a meeting every day you're less apt to drink that day. And secondly, psychologists have learned that your brain sort of "resets" itself after a 90 day period of behavior modification. Don't ask me why.

I'd suggest that you cash in on that high probability of attending another meeting. Having the Big Book is one thing, but it's more important that you have another alcoholic walk you through it. Ashleek had an excellent suggestion. Try to go to different meetings. You'll find that there's a lot of variety in AA and this will allow you to find other meetings that you'll get a lot out of. And if you don't like the Lord's Prayer, there's no requirement that you recite it. I've been to meetings with a lot of Orthodox Jews in the group. They prayed, but in Hebrew, and I'll bet it wasn't the Lords Prayer.
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Old 10-13-2009, 07:29 PM   #7 (permalink)
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AA? it's been an awesome adventure for me.

I'm glad you found a friendly supportive group.

Those phone numbers? The members want you to call
If one number can't talk or is not home...simply call another,
Yes....that means 24/7 Your call helps them too.

Good to see you moving forward....
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Old 10-13-2009, 08:06 PM   #8 (permalink)
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AA? it's been an awesome adventure for me.
Oh yea, it was AA... my bad for not clarifying.
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Old 10-13-2009, 08:25 PM   #9 (permalink)
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me... Sorry for any confusion.

Yes I do follow the AA Steps
they have given me a fantastic new life

Recovery really rocks.....
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Old 10-13-2009, 09:23 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Congrats on your first meeting! I went to my first one today too! :-) Kinda scary at first, but it was nice how down-to-earth everybody was, and the camaraderie part is the best. It's kind of re-energizing.
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Old 10-13-2009, 10:29 PM   #11 (permalink)
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And secondly, psychologists have learned that your brain sort of "resets" itself after a 90 day period of behavior modification. Don't ask me why.
Oh, I really hope that's true. I am getting close to having "90 in 90" and I am still having those days where something in my head just wants to rebel and not do the right thing. It's encouraging to think my sticking to it might reset my head.

Grats to both of you on your first meeting! I was put off by the Lord's Prayer at first too but after a while I got to know people and enjoy their company and somehow it just didn't matter as much to me.
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:04 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Glad to hear both of you had a good first meeting!!!

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It's encouraging to think my sticking to it might reset my head.
Ninsuna just keep in mind that being reset does not mean cured, nor does it mean that the work is over, in reality it allows the fog to clear as well as the establishment of a new pattern, now is when the real work begins and a new life begins to emerge. Keep working it, it works if WE work it.
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:16 AM   #13 (permalink)
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The 90 in 90 is quite interesting, the old timers 20 yrs+ say its a load of tosh (this has a lot to do with the fact that there are many many more residential treatment centres around that recommend the 90 in 90 after leaving the centre)...then you have most people with 10 years and less in our meetings who recommend the 90 in 90...so?!

I have asked many times why do the 90 in 90 and it is in order to get the program as quickly as possible and to start working the steps. This is especially important for people that have not as many consequences with their drinking, i.e. some young people. The theory is the further you get away from your last drunk the less motivation you will have to work the program in it's entirity...

Obviously you dont just stay sober for 90 days though!?! Its a building block for the future:-)

nice one for getting down to your first meeting, i hope many more follow for you...
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:43 PM   #14 (permalink)
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So I went to the meeting tonight that was mentioned to me by one of the guys at my first meeting yesterday... and I think it may have been a different group entirely?

I'm not 100% certain, but there wasn't a familiar face there. At the beginning the group leader (different person) gave the whole schpiel and seemed kinda incredulous when he asked if there was anyone new at the meeting. Asked if there was anyone new or from a different group, then looked around (I kinda stick out in a crowd) and went "Okaaay". It was a small group and slightly awkward after that.

Anyways, guess I'll play it safe and head back to the same Tuesday meeting next week. A much bigger group and kind of friendlier... not really sure what to make of this experience! Haha.

I had that Big Book and White Chip with me to verify my "deservedness", but I'm pretty sure it was a different group altogether. Looking at the local AA website's Meeting Directory, the meeting tonight is <Townname>, where as yesterday's was <Townname> <Nouns>.

Hmmmmm... may be curious to try and figure out if they're the same group or not. Or try a "definitely" different one altogether tomorrow (namely in a different town). So it goes.
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:52 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Hi! I went to my first AA meeting today, too. It was very positive and supportive. The face to face thing really helps. Some women gave me their phone numbers and took mine. I felt like they don't want me to slip through the cracks and want me to keep coming back. They were very happy to have a "newcomer" in the group.

The Lord's Prayer wasn't my thing either, but I just bowed my head and went along with it.
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:54 PM   #16 (permalink)
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That is AWESOME! Keeping going. Meetings have common themes but are all different. Some are older crowds and some are just younger, some mixed, some small, some large. They will not kick you out for speaking up my friend.
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:59 PM   #17 (permalink)
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They will not kick you out for speaking up my friend.
Well that was part of the awkwardness tonight... didn't speak out really very much at all except for brief introductions at the beginning, kept pretty mum throughout, and scooted out after talking briefly with some of the guys there afterwards. Strange...

There's one at Noon tomorrow the town over. If the work schedule's looking flexible, might head to that one and see what kind of crowd that draws (and readily admit I'm from a different group! ).
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Old 10-14-2009, 08:06 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Hey I sobered up in Yuma, AZ,, Talk about a small town. The largest meeting I can recall was about 35. On Saturday mornings around here there is a group of about 85 on a regular basis. For me I liked the small groups as I met one person at a time and then I knew most of them. I liked the meetings where there where a lot of new people like myself,, Nutty! LOL .. Now still nutty the 'more soberity' interest me as I have grown up, have kids, house, baseball on Sundays etc..

So feel free to test drive some meeting is my rambling point! LOL
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Old 10-15-2009, 12:19 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Way to go DonneIslanding I liked your "haha" and your writing style. I look forward to reading more about your journey into recovery.

Conrats to you as well TraderJane, nice work on making a meeting
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Old 10-15-2009, 04:40 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Donne .. first im glad your making the attempt to do some meeting they will increase your chances at a happy sober future .
Ive been attending the same meeting back home and each time i go it seems like a diff meeting in a small way .. there are a few faces that have been there for as long or longer then I have ( 6 yrs ) but each time I do attend there IS ALWAYS new faces , which for many mite seem like a diff meeting to some .
Depending on where you at and how many meeting there are in your area , It could very well be new faces alot . It dones always mean its New tho . the meetings are generally the same format each time . newcommers , topic , book study . they still follow that label of meeting . If and when you choose a reg meeting you will see ( hopfuly ) a few same faces each time you go . like around here in SR there are so many that come and go , not getting it , thats the sad part of recovery but its also eyeopening . keep up the great job on staying sober and reaching out and trying something that could change your life , if your willing to work it .. huggles Endzy
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