Dee74

Congrats on day 30 Tetrax

Just a reminder, or heads up - this thread moves to the Daily Support forum at the end of the month, and the new Class of April 2022 takes its place here.

This thread goes on and nothing else changes but the new location.

People can continue to post in this thread, move to the new thread, or post in both

D

freedomfries

Good morning. It's day 5. Another drinking dream. I suppose they'll get less frequent with more sober time.

Binge ate yesterday evening after being good all day. Urgh.

Lots of AV this morning but I'll power through.

Erratic

morning x
had early night again, catching up on crap sleep while drinking. day 4 and i took my tablet yesterday morning which i will take again before going to work this morn.
good to see everyone posts and good job on your time. sry i havent much to say, but here with u all x

have a good day if can x

Zura

Still sober, still quiet. Hopefully I'll be able to participate properly soon. Rooting for everyone that they hang on to their sobriety. Congratulations everyone.

RAL

congrats on 30 days Tetrax

Congrats to everyone whether day 1 or 101

Excited to have not drunk in March and now moving to daily threads

Re drinking thoughts. Mine tend to be fleeting. Until they are not. Then the huge thought comes and I just think it will never go away so I drink. Huge triggers for me are TV and books. Seeing someone on the TV with a glass of wine is so so difficult. Event when I had 3 years sober THAT would be a huge problem for me. And reading about people relaxing with a big glass of wine. that annoys me, triggers me. Why is it so socially acceptable and seen as a desire, a necessity to relax. Imagine if they did that with smoking! Well they used to 40 years ago I suppose.

Anyway, morning musings. Last day at work till 11th. Going to beach after work.Will check in later. Hope everyone has a great day x

freedomfries

Oh, how I want to drink. Just get buzzed not wasted, but I'd probably get wasted. I get ativan soon so at least I have that to look forward to.

RAL

That's worrying ff. Looking forward to ativan.😥 Maybe look at your 2nd vac so you can get a rehab place.

freedomfries

Well I got the ativan and drank.

It seems like there's no hope for a boy like me. What do those ex-beer drinkers know about addiction? I'm on hand sanitizer this morning. I'm too far gone for help. There is only death and decline in my future.

Dee74

You need to go to inpatient rehab, ASAP.

D

RAL

What Dee said ff.

Youre not a little boy who has no choices. You are a man. An adult who can make decisions and choose a better life for yourself.

bobdrop

Good morning all. Day 10 here.
Best of luck FF.
Zura, hope you feel less quiet soon

FiveTries

I woke up feeling great today. Day 8.
I will not drink today.

When the time comes that I allow myself to consider drinking, the above is how it shows up in my mind.

... but I'll probably get wasted.

RAL

My never ending wish was to just be able to have a few and get nicely buzzed. But it never happened. On the days I stopped and i could stop i just wanted more so was annoyed I'd stopped. Most if the tune I just carried on and got wasted.

I could stop i just never wanted to stop.i wanted to just keep chasing that buzz which you never get back.

Now I'm grateful not to keep going through that mindset every single day.

samwitch

Lots of posts. I have to run, but I will just say--FF-you HAVE a choice, you aren't too far gone. Alcohol is making you believe that.

And I know there are a lot of people on SR who have faced the same issues as you, but as Dee said--get yourself to rehab. I honestly think by not getting your second shot you set up a roadblock. I truly hope you can see what drinking is doing to your mental health and I wish you the ability to carve out a healthy life for you. You can do this!!

venuscat

The wine on TV shows was a trigger for me as well, for years to be honest. But once I read up on what they are actually drinking/not drinking, it made it a lot easier to deal with.
It is never wine. Or alcohol at all. Just like there is never any coffee in the cups. It is all fake.

Still, I understand the tigger. And I avoided certain tv shows for a while after I got sober.

Have fun at the beach love! s xx ❤️

venuscat

FF ~ please listen to Dee and RAL ❤️

Behappy1

Good morning all! I hope all is well with everyone. I am facing a DUI and I can go from being hopeful to in tears in the blink of an eye. My family though disgusted and disappointed has been very supportive and for that I am grateful. I have not drank since being picked up and won't. I know that I have to face this head on and clear minded. Waiting to hear back from the attorney and saying lots of prayers. I hope everyone has a good day.

venuscat

I definitely think AA via Zoom, or another recovery group is a good idea right now dear Behappy. Or a phone or online counsellor. I think I would want to talk to someone, probably a lot, at the moment.

I am really glad your family is supporting you, and so glad you have the family lawyer. This scary time can be the lesson of a lifetime....a miracle really. s ❤️

Behappy1

Yes, it is very scary. I go from hopeful to tears in a split second. I have zoom counseling set up 1x a week and zoom meetings as many times as I can get to it. Thank you! Have a great day everyone.

nez

This ex-beer drinker knows first hand about not being able to sleep through the night without his body wakening him up screaming for alcohol because it was starting to go through withdrawals and was shaking uncontrollably. I know first hand about seizures (which can be fatal) from not answering my body's scream for alcohol. I know that I built my sobriety in 15 minute increments because I couldn't say no to alcohol, but I could put the action off for 15 minutes. Made it that 15 minutes, try for another 15, and so on. I know first hand about addiction.

You can say I don't understand. You can say your addiction is different and special and nobody understands your addiction because they don't face and go through the same things that you do. I used that same line of thought for years... but I was wrong!

Nobody is too far gone! Help is all around you, but you need to acknowledge and embrace it before it can help.

You are worth it. You don't even have to believe it for now, just embrace the help and participate in the process. Along the way the realization that "you are worth it" will come and you will know it first hand!