Viperidae

Hi kids, on the beach! Finally a warm day with nice water. I love the warm salt water. A nice swim!

there’s complication after complication with my nephew that had his appendix burst and had the the emergency surgery. My poor brother in law is getting no sleep. I think my sister will fly back, and I’ll be here kind of on my own for a bit.

The guy that did my one tattoo that I live was in this area and I’d now a couple hours away... hmmmm. I would get one on my other inner wrist.

I’ll take this 80 degree day and warm enough waters any day. It’s snowing 6 inches at home!! 😂 I hate that place. My word you can just chose to live your life in Florida if you can pick up and move?? Why is anyone in CT?? Ecchhh. Some people like the seasons. I’ll pass.

Vipe

Dee74

Congrats on your first sponsee Snitch!

erattic the people who beat this thing are the ones who keep coming back - and you keep coming back

Glad to hear you're happy Vipe - is it heresy for me to say I find endless sun and heat can get a bit wearing after a while?... you should be good for 20-30 years tho lol

I hope all is well with you Daisy

D

Daisybelle

I'm guessing you're well in bed by now Erratic. What kind of things are you interested in? We might be able to think of something that appeals as a hobby.

Hi Suze, I'm keeping your mum in my prayers.
Great news re you having your first sponsee, I'm sure you'll be a good sponsor, no doubts about it.

I hope your nephew's okay Viper, he must be a worry for your sister. Enjoy your time in the sun, wish you could send us a bit.

All is good with me thank you Dee and I hope its the same for you. I'm well and Peter is getting better by the day. I'm starting him on light duties next week, lol.

Goodnight all, stay safe. xxx

Erratic

morning all sry never got chance to come back again last night x im up early to go and meet my breakfast club people when i was working a sunday morning lol, so told them i would come around even im not working and chat with them x
thanks snitch x hey great that your a sponsor!!! you will be great at it !!!
dee thanks for saying that i can beat this by coming back i will always come back xx
daisy, i like alot of things but i find i dont hold the same concentration when im sober, i find it hard to even watch tv when sober. was thinking about horseriding again, but that wont happen this year!, could maybe go back to the gym but dont fancy wearing a mask while doing exercise. im not really any good at craft things, hense why i have to pay others lol to do stuff, but tthen i guess could learn. i actually do have a course outstanding work on forensic science, but again concentration is hard, hense when i did that year, i was told my education psycologist i had ADD lol but thats putting a downer, as i did do this free online course about the liver couple of years back online. hmm its hard one x
anyway i better go get that cup of tea before i head out lol to meet these peeps xx thanks for asking daisy xx
will be back later to end my day with 6 xx
here wishing ur mum is ok snitch also xxx and hey viper sry didnt mean to ingnore u xx thinking of you aswell xx

snitch

Hey guys

Viper I'm sorry youre nephew is having a bad time but enjoy the beach sun and sea!

Erratic, yiu mentioned forensic science and my ears pricked up! I am obsessed with forensics. What exactly is it that you are doing?

Daisy I am glad to hear that Mr DB continues to get better.

Hey Dee thanks for all the work you do around here and the support yoh give.

I am a week abstinant from sugar yey! I've been sticking to my meal plan and really enjoying the food I am eating. Weigh day tues so we'll see.

I popped to sainsburys earlier to get a few bits. We were at Serens dad and he has a huge store near him. I never go down the booze aisle but as soon as you walk in there are bottles everywhere. The first display came across was prosecco all wrapped up in a beautiful bottle. Prettily packaged poison. Anyway I did my shopping but on the way back I was hit with this tremendous desire to drink alcohol. It was so strong I was like **** it I am going to drink. I cant live without it.

O.M.G

I was praying to my HP... remove these insane thoughts! But they scared me. Terrified me. I got kn a meetjng tonight and shared. I am so scared I am gong to be one of the % of people that will drink again. That desire today was soooo strong. I so gratwful that I am sober and I am in bed safe tonight.

Goodnght my lovelies

Xxx

Dee74

The thing is tho - however strong the desire was - you were stronger Snitch.
Instead of buying a bottle you did all the right things - you prayed, you hit a meeting and you shared.

I think you're gonna be ok

D

Erratic

morning all xx
its just a general course snitch, i haven actually read it all, i think i just read the first sheet which started off about law its in binders which i have had it for many moons i bought it over time while i was a member for a bpd forum which they was charity run and the leader of the forum also taught online courses for this place,we are talking the timewise like i first started here in 2005, so its been sitting there for very long time. hope that makes sense x i still also have online courses with aberdeen university of science also, which i started with geology and enviromental studies, which i completed and then went onto maths and computer science which again was all 1st year uni credits. I was doing that when i became sober for that year, but couldnt finish due to being ill and had to pull out, it was also the university who got me to see the education psychologist, who said in the report i was ADD with medium or something dyslexic and dyspraxia. The other problem at the time was my bpd was very much at forefront which people like me will go through many diffrent things but never finish anything if u understand? i had a very bz sober year but never finishing anything x

really glad u got past that thoughts snitch xx
day 7 here x
better get started this morning im working this afo and tomo for a few hrs which yup im a sucker for doing this for my boss after everything he did to me.

speak to u all later x

Daisybelle

Hi all

Just checking in quickly before I go to bed, it's a bit late.

Erratic, we're totally different then hobby wise, I love crafts, I just wish I had more hours in my day to do more than I do. Back in the summer you started doing some gardening and you seemed to enjoy it, , I know it's winter now and its cold, plus the ground will be rock hard, but you could do something maybe like sewing seeds for summer perenials or grow some fancy peppers, there must be all kinds of stuff like that that can be done in winter, I'm too tired to think properly at the minute. Bird watching is fascinating too, well I think it is, you could maybe get a bird table or lots of feeders and see what birds you attract in your garden. Sorry, I don't mean to be telling you what to do, you can tell me to get lost, lol, I do tend to get a bit bossy now and then.

Thanks Suze, Peter is doing well, he has to go for a chest Xray this Friday because he had a few bad days last week with an underlying chest infection, he was given more antibiotics which helped but it's good that he's having the Xray.
Well done on your sugar abstinence and thanks for sharing about your brush with temptation in Sainsbury's. We need to be extra careful at this time of year because Alcohol is glorified everywhere we look, more so than usual. You did yourself proud, you've got this.

I'm with Suze and Erratic Dee, thanks for all you do for us.

Goodnight and lots of love.

keep safe. xx

Erratic

morning all x
thanks daisy, and no way i would tell u to shut up or get lost xx thanks for input x the thing about crafty stuff is i dont have the confidence to do it and not sure if i have the patience either x i used to go to a group which we did crafty stuff but i have to be shown what needs doing if u understand, i dont seem to be able to just have it pop out of my own mind. The nearest thing crafty i am doing is waiting for this material which i want to cover my toolbox with, but have asked my friend who has petshop to help with it as i have noway of knowing what to do lol i even have bought a bee for opening the box up, that kind of thing i think about but again have no confidence in doing it myself.When i was a kid i used to love doing crafty stuff, but lost all that before i was teenager. i loved cutting out felt and sticking and making pictures when young u know that stuff we used to get when younger? also loved colouring in, but i cant sit and do that adult colouring in books now either. anyway im sure something will crop up sometime x on the gardening, its to wet here to do anything just now x anyway enough of that this time of morning.

good that peter is doing better xx izzy is doing much better also, he sucked on some toast last night lol daughter sent me a pic x
oh by way its day 8 of the 30 day AF x also got work this afo, so that will keep me bz x
snitch keep up the good work hun xx

here thining of you all x have good day xx

Viperidae

Thanks all. My sister took a plane back to CT for a bit until this settles. My nephew is highly addicted to weed and that’s another thing. He’s stopping. I smoked a lot of weed in my day but never had sleepless nights and sweats from quitting. I guess everyone is different. Dee maybe you know more than I do, it seems like he is very physically addicted. Anyway they are sending him to a program.

It’s been freezing here. Every 6 or 7 years this happens and it’s total BS. Clouds, very cool temps, very high winds. I lost my jolt I got from Florida. I’ve been sleeping like almost constantly. We’ll see tomorrow should be 70 and sunny. That’s enough if the wind is low. At least I can sit at the water.

Dee yes it is heresy!!! Haha. No I like the seasons too, I just like tropical weather more. My health conditions let up. Of course California has got to have the nicest weather anywhere. What a wonderful State.

Snitch good job killing that urge. You used your tools and it worked. What an evil sickness. It’s truly a miracle that I have no interest at all in booze. Not since the day I stopped. I sat at a bar today for an outdoor breakfast with People *boozing it up at 11a.m.* with the huge bloody Mary’s and, and whatever other breakfast drinks are out there. I was looking at the bottles wondering why I felt nothing at all. Not drinking has been easy, but living has been hard.

There is a big difference between the way my State Government and people are reacting to COVID, and the way the Government and people in Florida are. I’m not rendering an opinion just an observation.

ok later and I need warm days!!! They really aren’t going to show up. Not what I crave. It’s just not coming.

Vipe 🐍💜

snitch

I can't sleep. My mum's cancer has spread to her brain. There is still things they can do. She is going to start radiotherapy on Friday. I am devastated but trying to be positive. Cancer treatment has come so far and my mum is a fighter and I am so bloody grateful I am sober to be there for her. I tell you one thing, it has made me HATE alcohol and see it for the true liar it is. It robbed me of so much. So much precious time I could have spent with my family. I am not getting all maudlin, the past is gone but I am sober today and I will NEVER let my head romanticize alcohol again. It is a destroyer of lives.

Dee74

sleeplessness, sweating, irritability...his weed quit sounds a lot like mine was Vipe.
Hope the temps get a little better for you soon

D

Erratic

snitch i am really sry to hear this xx i do wish the cancer treatment will work xx

sry for quick reply but as normal its work morning and got to get my tea x snitch u and ur mum and family are in my thoughts and wish for the best xx

Viperidae

Snitch I’m so sorry about your mom. You did your best. Now your sober and you can be there. Imagine if you were still drinking and this was going on?

Maybe I always make things about me on here, I’ve been wondering or maybe I’m trying to relate so here goes: You know it often kicks me in the gut the number of times I drove by my mom’s house to see her sitting on the front step looking lonely (her dementia was 5/10 for a decade) and drive right by because I had something else on my mind and certainly I was going to drink or doing something before I went to drink.

Plus my dad and I always butted heads and I never had the clarity of mind to just go be with him, instead of arguing like 2 children. By the time I got it right he died.

my regret doesn’t help but I still do it all the time.

Dee74

We crossposted Snitch - I'm so sorry.

All my prayers to you and your mom and family. As awful as the news is, I'm sure she will fight it - and I'm glad that you can be there fully present now.

It will be a gift for both of you.

D

Daisybelle

Suze, I am so, so sorry to read about your mum, no one deserves that, try and keep positive, like you say there are things they can do that will help. You're already doing the very best thing you can for you mum by being sober, she needs that. Try not to dwell on the past, you're here for her now sober and present. I'm keeping her in my prayers.

I hear you on the craft stuff Erratic, it one of those things isn't it, you either have it or you don't. I wasn't thinking about the weather when I said about the gardening sorry, it was very late, lol, and I was just thinking how you seemed to enjoy it in the summer. I'm sure you'll find something. Izzy is just gorgeous as is Willem, you're very blessed.

I hope your nephew gets sorted Viper, I've never done weed so I know nothing about it really. Though like all addictions I suppose everyone has to deal with it in whatever way is best for them.
I think we all have regrets about what we did or didn't do where family are concerned. What I've come to learn, especially after losing my beautiful dad and my since my best friend in all the world has now been diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease and is deteriorating rapidly is that life is too short for all the nonsense, all the falling out etc, be forgiving and live and let live.

I hope you are well Dee and that things are good in your neck of the woods.

Lots of love to all of you.

Keep sober, keep safe. xxx

Daisybelle

Good morning lovelies.

Wishing you all the best Saturday possible.

Lots of love and stay safe you lot.

Erratic

afternoon x
thanks daisy x cant wait to see daughter and the boys, we are heading down on xmas eve so suprise them xmas morning x
well im on the 12th day of this 30 day thing, im just breaking even just now but its more that ive done in the past so im not going to beat myself up. once the 30 day AF finishes i will prob go do it again and improve my AF days more thats if i keep on having slips, i also can do this other thing which is called 100 days of lasting change, which i would have to commit to, but will see how things go.

snitch hope ur ok and u too viper xx
anyway off to do some surfing to keep my mind bz x

Daisybelle

Not long to wait Erratic before you'll be with them. Willem is a lovely age now to enjoy Christmas, it will all be magical to him.
Keep on chipping away at your 30 day challenge, like you say it's more than you've done previously so you must be on the right track there.

Goodnight, sleep well. xxx

Keep safe xxx

snitch

Morning guys,

Thanks for all your well wishes for my mum. She starts her radiotherapy on Wednesday and she is feeling really well at the moment and is in good spirits 😊😊

Last night my sisters and I walked 13 miles to raise money for St. Catherine's Hospice and we got £2258! So so chuffed. I've never even done any charity work before. It feels so rewarding to be able to do something for such a good cause. My mum and dad are so proud of us bless them. I am beyond grateful to be sober today!

Well done Erratic on your AF days and I am so happy for you that youbare spending Christmas with your family ♥️♥️

Thanks for sharing that personal stuff with is Vipe. It means alot. We can't change the past. I have regrets that I wasnt there how I should have been for my mum during her first cancer and also my nan when she passed. I just wasnt capable because I was so under the spell of alcohol. But what I do know is that my mum doesnt want and my nan wouldnt want me to living in guilt and remorse. We were so so sick. But we are getting more well everyday ♥️

Daisy, what are your plans for Christmas?

And come on Dee, do you guys really spend xmas day on the beach???

Waiting for Seren to get home and we are going to have a cosy afternoon at home . Our star for our new tree is too heavy so I want us to make a fairy together hahaha.

Have a lovely afternoon whatever you're all up to

Xxx