Dee74

I know that must have been hard FF but maybe its the start of a new chapter for you?
___________

big no on NA beer for me. I missed the buzz and soon enough I'd be back on the hard stuff.
D

venuscat

I am with Dee on the NA beer dear Berony. ❤️

outdoors

Good morning! Day 3 here. I’m in that dangerous cruise control time period- so I’ll keep checking in here with you fine people.

venuscat

That was brave of you FF, to task your mum to do that. I am so glad you did.

What about hopping on the phone and talking to an alcohol counsellor?
I am thinking they are most likely available to talk to, but I will defer to Reid on this one.

Hoping today is a much better day for you.....maybe even another talk with your parents.
Perhaps they need to know how hard this is for you?

Just my thoughts. ❤️

venuscat

With you every step dear Outdoors.

What are your plans for the day? ❤️

freedomfries

I'm on the waiting list to see an addiction counselor with the health service but unfortunately they're not doing phone appointments. I was meant to get an appt in april but then covid.

I could perhaps see if a private counselor is doing phone appointments but unfortunately it'll be expensive. Something I'll consider

venuscat

I was able to get a few appointments with an online counsellor here for very little. (last week).
I was surprised, for sure.
I guess with mental health being a pretty big world-wide issue right now, there seems to be a lot of help here (in the US) that is pretty easy to access.

I wonder if govt services there might be doing the same thing? s xx

freedomfries

Well I made it 24 hours (in three minutes)

Been a few days since I made it this far. It was right to ask to hide the hand sanitizer. Though my AV is cursing me.

mystified

That would be a hard no for me.
I drank a few AF beers throughout my pregnancies but was immediately back on the wine as soon as I gave birth.

At one point in 2015/16 I quit drinking for 8 months. Then I decided that the odd AF beer wouldn't hurt, I'd drank them through my pregnancies right? AF beer led back to wine, then spirits and here I am back on 1 week sober after multiple attempts at sobriety and never managing more than a few months at a stretch before getting complacent and going through the wringer again.

Your mileage may vary of course but I suggest you don't be me.

mystified

You rock FF.

Sober369

I agree with everyone (so far) on the AF beer and wine. Although, I have heard of people saying it helps them. I can't see how. But I never really liked the taste of alcohol, anyway. I tolerated it for the feeling it gave me. Even after I realized that the feeling it gave me was only a good feeling for about 30 minutes, then started morphing quickly into the bad feelings that would stay with me until I drank again the next day. What a horrible cycle that was. I'm so grateful to be off of it!
Freedom, right now is the best time to get free or cheap counseling over the phone. I have seen several numbers posted for different groups doing this in the U.S. You are in England, is that right? Sorry if I'm not supposed to ask, I was just curious because I have this view that I probably got from the media that England has wonderful healthcare.
I hope so much that you will look into it today. Like Reid said, it is time for you to do something more. I agree with Mystified, too, that You Rock!! You have not given up, and keep trying, and that is really the key. I am praying for you!
Have the best ever day everyone.

outdoors

I'm still working everyday, so my daytime is handled. I finish sometime around 5. After that I have family time and dinner. Its like a fire drill at my house these days, My wife works two jobs remotely and has to take care of the kids. So when I get home I have to tap her out for her sanity. Unfortunately that's a super stressful way to end the day. I've been checking in here as I do those chores, just for some encouragement and a change in habits.

outdoors

Also- If anyone is a music fan:

I'm a huge Jason Isbell fan, and his struggles with alcohol are well documented. He's now 8ish years sober, and on his new album "Reunions" he has a song called "It gets easier." Its essentially a conversation between current Jason and newly sober Jason. Its really good, and ya'll might enjoy it.

venuscat

I like a lot of country music.....very partial to some Aussie country.
I love The Waifs....this is an old one.



Hope your day flies and we will see you later. s xx

TiredCarpenter

FF: I have also slurped hand sanitizer. Many alcoholics have.

My position as an instructor in a post-secondary institute necessitates professionalism. Jonesing for alcohol 3 hours into my day was making me a trembling, shaking, almost wrenching mess. I recall standing in a bathroom stall about 11:20 a.m. listening (to ensure no one was around) then slurping a couple of times, from a very shaky hand, a good sized dollop of hand sanitizer.

It’s high ethanol (alcohol) content, actually, maybe tragically, makes it very effective at chasing away our snakes.

I shared this story at an open meeting once. 2 or 3 sharers later a lady in alanon was in tears while she thanked me for sharing.

I DON’T THINK ANY NON-ALCOHOLICS eat hand sanitizer. I could be wrong.

Anyway, don’t sweat it too much, it happens, but.......GET SOBER before you die from this disease.
May your parents attend a graduation, not a funeral.


This is day 52 for me. Feeling better than I could’ve imagined.
I wish this for you.

freedomfries

Good to know I'm not alone! Looking forward to my day 52.

venuscat

That just terrifies me dear TC.
Big time.

But that is the past....and now you are 52 days sober which is WONDERFUL!!!! ❤️

TiredCarpenter

FF: I’m guessing you’re very intelligent and get bored often.

Might be good to find a bunch of ways to stay busy. Online meetings, SR, SMART, maybe some youth support stuff, excellent hobbies, dirt-biking.

In the pre-covid days a person could get involved in meeting set-up, cleaning, organizing. Boring as hell sometimes, but you were hanging out with winners. I washed 1000’s of ashtrays after meetings back when.

Be well, breathe, and keep in touch.

DariaM

I think this is a good point. Try to find things to occupy/distract yourself. I think in a lot of ways getting and staying sober right now is more difficult, because we're all trapped in our houses with just ourselves for company and little to occupy our time. I've been trying to keep my mind off not drinking by focusing on other things I can do, but it was certainly a lot easier last fall when I had a more busy, normal life, which included classes to occupy my time.

ReadyAtLast

Freedom-can you see your GP for a referral? I know our GP says they have never been so quiet as people are not going to them with minor ailments because of Covid. Congrats on 24 hours

And def do something. I'm reading, painting and doing jigsaws all day and evening