Artists in Recovery Part 2
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Artists in Recovery Part 2
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,745
Hello out there to all the folks of a creative disposition who are in recovery!
I'm writing this because I think being in the dailies might expose us to some new people?
We are here to heal and to create together, no matter what your creative persuasion. I personally am a visual artist. We are writers, musicians, knitters, cooks, all of the above. We are interested in griping, winging, sharing milestones, and sharing tips on how to stay productive in recovery and how to use our art to help heal us. We are here to celebrate the regained use of our beautiful minds and hands. We are here to shed the social construct of the twisted artist.
Today I felt really hesitant to work on my current painting because I think I've been staring at it too long, and I think I might make a rash decision, so I did execute one huge decision, but I'm going to put it away for the rest of the weekend. Then I'm gonna try to wrap up the whole thing next week. I have come to a point where it should be a pretty easy progression, just gotta take it one step at a time. Paint in all my shadows, then add my tints (there won't be much color), then my highlights, then my glaze. I am the kind of artist that really appreciates a formula. I work well with a plan sometimes.
I'm writing this because I think being in the dailies might expose us to some new people?
We are here to heal and to create together, no matter what your creative persuasion. I personally am a visual artist. We are writers, musicians, knitters, cooks, all of the above. We are interested in griping, winging, sharing milestones, and sharing tips on how to stay productive in recovery and how to use our art to help heal us. We are here to celebrate the regained use of our beautiful minds and hands. We are here to shed the social construct of the twisted artist.
Today I felt really hesitant to work on my current painting because I think I've been staring at it too long, and I think I might make a rash decision, so I did execute one huge decision, but I'm going to put it away for the rest of the weekend. Then I'm gonna try to wrap up the whole thing next week. I have come to a point where it should be a pretty easy progression, just gotta take it one step at a time. Paint in all my shadows, then add my tints (there won't be much color), then my highlights, then my glaze. I am the kind of artist that really appreciates a formula. I work well with a plan sometimes.
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
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Originally Posted by Plenny 
Hi MB! Look at us!
Well since we contribute to this thread it is automatically added to our subscriptions anyway so in that way it is already bookmarked so I guess I don't need to make a new bookmark in my browser
Well since we contribute to this thread it is automatically added to our subscriptions anyway so in that way it is already bookmarked so I guess I don't need to make a new bookmark in my browser
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Hi, creative people!
Yesterday I had the most difficult inches to walk so far.
I literally made them my the skin of my teeth.
But I did it!
I have to work on this momentum though.
Have a good creative day, everyone!
Yesterday I had the most difficult inches to walk so far.
I literally made them my the skin of my teeth.
But I did it!
I have to work on this momentum though.
Have a good creative day, everyone!
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
In case if SR friends new to the thread wonder what are those inches I keep talking about, I will re-post my original message:
I’ve heard more than once how important it is to write every day, preferably at the same time of the day. Because it trains the brain to get accustomed to this activity as an integral part of a daily routine.
I tried many times, managed to get some string of writing days together, then decided that I “got it”’ and let myself slip. In no time the momentum evaporates and it’s darn hard to get myself into habit again.
It’s weird that when it comes to training or proper nutrition it’s as clear as day for me – you have to follow the plan day in and day out for weeks and months to see the first results.
It’s the same with creative activity. Totally the same.
This time what really stroke the right cord was the advice I found in the book “Bird by bird: some instruction on writing and life”. I heard this book recommended by some quite successful writers, but somehow procrastinated about buying it.
So, about a week ago I got it into my Kindle. And, my, those $12 are among my best investments. The book is just hilarious.
So, the author recommended, when struggling to get to writing (as Steven Pressfield says that a pro knows what an amateur doesn’t know – it’s not the writing part that’s hard, it’s sitting to write), imagine that there is an inch-size frame on the screen, and all you have to do is fill this frame up.
An inch? I can do it.
I adjusted my Word window to fit an inch frame and focused on this. If I feel like writing more, I will write more. If that’s it, then that’s it.
Once I started writing I though went far beyond my inch.
Just like in recovery it’s important not to overwhelm yourself with excessive expectations about outcome. Baby steps. Process matters. Giving full attention to the process and deep work matter. Putting the best efforts within this inch of work matters. Outcome will eventually follow.
It’s interesting that this inch metaphor holds double power for me.
About two months ago I listened to the podcast with one of my favorite fighters. He said that at the very end of every workout he hits the wall. When the body just says “Stop”. And pushing through this wall, going just one inch further – it’s where all the growth happens.
“Just inches. But inches add up”.
So, I write in my notebook everyday “What is my inch for today?”.
I’ve heard more than once how important it is to write every day, preferably at the same time of the day. Because it trains the brain to get accustomed to this activity as an integral part of a daily routine.
I tried many times, managed to get some string of writing days together, then decided that I “got it”’ and let myself slip. In no time the momentum evaporates and it’s darn hard to get myself into habit again.
It’s weird that when it comes to training or proper nutrition it’s as clear as day for me – you have to follow the plan day in and day out for weeks and months to see the first results.
It’s the same with creative activity. Totally the same.
This time what really stroke the right cord was the advice I found in the book “Bird by bird: some instruction on writing and life”. I heard this book recommended by some quite successful writers, but somehow procrastinated about buying it.
So, about a week ago I got it into my Kindle. And, my, those $12 are among my best investments. The book is just hilarious.
So, the author recommended, when struggling to get to writing (as Steven Pressfield says that a pro knows what an amateur doesn’t know – it’s not the writing part that’s hard, it’s sitting to write), imagine that there is an inch-size frame on the screen, and all you have to do is fill this frame up.
An inch? I can do it.
I adjusted my Word window to fit an inch frame and focused on this. If I feel like writing more, I will write more. If that’s it, then that’s it.
Once I started writing I though went far beyond my inch.
Just like in recovery it’s important not to overwhelm yourself with excessive expectations about outcome. Baby steps. Process matters. Giving full attention to the process and deep work matter. Putting the best efforts within this inch of work matters. Outcome will eventually follow.
It’s interesting that this inch metaphor holds double power for me.
About two months ago I listened to the podcast with one of my favorite fighters. He said that at the very end of every workout he hits the wall. When the body just says “Stop”. And pushing through this wall, going just one inch further – it’s where all the growth happens.
“Just inches. But inches add up”.
So, I write in my notebook everyday “What is my inch for today?”.
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,745
I'd like to add something in about the daily practice.... it's really important to me to get past the worries of embarking on an inch of work on the creative process. I feel so frozen at first but if I just get started I can unleash a lot of potential. Cracking into the active stage is how I make myself available to the muse.
However, I find that if for some reason I am having trouble getting to the active stage, I am usually formulating in my head and I have found in the past that I can work smarter not harder after a period of contemplation. Sometimes I feel like during a receptive stage, where I'm gathering inspiration from the universe and composing a piece in my mind, I'm doing almost half the work!
So, even though I am making it a priority to push for active art making every day, I am going to take it easy on myself if I need time to receive information
However, I find that if for some reason I am having trouble getting to the active stage, I am usually formulating in my head and I have found in the past that I can work smarter not harder after a period of contemplation. Sometimes I feel like during a receptive stage, where I'm gathering inspiration from the universe and composing a piece in my mind, I'm doing almost half the work!
So, even though I am making it a priority to push for active art making every day, I am going to take it easy on myself if I need time to receive information
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Awesome post, Plenny!
I can absolutely relate to "work smarter".
It's time to let the creative well fill in. And it's time to pump it up and process.
Today I am following Steven King's mantra: "I write every day, even on my Birthday and Xmas".
Obviously it's not 'mas.
Yes. It's my Birthday!
It's May 14 in my part of the world.
And I am still doing my inches.
Have a great day, everyone!
I can absolutely relate to "work smarter".
It's time to let the creative well fill in. And it's time to pump it up and process.
Today I am following Steven King's mantra: "I write every day, even on my Birthday and Xmas".
Obviously it's not 'mas.
Yes. It's my Birthday!
It's May 14 in my part of the world.
And I am still doing my inches.
Have a great day, everyone!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,745
Ok I did just an inch today but I finished the wood burning, so that means I can start painting, FULL NEXT STEP. So that feels good.
I forgot to mention something exciting that happened last week. I don't know how I forgot this but I met another artist who is a lot like me, and it's not rare to work in my medium where I live, but it is rare to meet someone with the same ethics and sort of a similar style of living to mine...
So I went to his house to see his studio and I just couldn't help but feel excited, I just had a million questions for him and I couldn't stop talking. We have a mutual friend and I kind of blurted out "Oh is he still sober?" Because I know that being in recovery was really important to this mutual friend. I felt really bad for just blurting that out so I apologized and explained that it had been on my mind because of my own recovery. I had meant to word it more sensitively but it just happened. He said not to worry because it's something they talk about a lot, and he said that he himself had been sober for 14 months!
It was so good for me to see a contemporary who is sober and making art and who I can relate to. It was a really magical afternoon for me. It was very validating and I felt for the first time like I was in a 'club'
I forgot to mention something exciting that happened last week. I don't know how I forgot this but I met another artist who is a lot like me, and it's not rare to work in my medium where I live, but it is rare to meet someone with the same ethics and sort of a similar style of living to mine...
So I went to his house to see his studio and I just couldn't help but feel excited, I just had a million questions for him and I couldn't stop talking. We have a mutual friend and I kind of blurted out "Oh is he still sober?" Because I know that being in recovery was really important to this mutual friend. I felt really bad for just blurting that out so I apologized and explained that it had been on my mind because of my own recovery. I had meant to word it more sensitively but it just happened. He said not to worry because it's something they talk about a lot, and he said that he himself had been sober for 14 months!
It was so good for me to see a contemporary who is sober and making art and who I can relate to. It was a really magical afternoon for me. It was very validating and I felt for the first time like I was in a 'club'
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,745
Ok, I woke up early this morning at my Bf's house, couldn't stay in bed any longer. I had a whole day ahead of me and felt very inspired, had a clear head, I had a clean studio to go to, with all my tools right there, all the chores done and bills paid. This is a very rare alignment and I was not going to let the opportunity pass.
I kissed Bf goodbye and rode my bike to the Pancake House (I always have to do one thing outside the studio -- and food related -- before work so I don't get restless or distracted), and stepped right into my pajamas/painting clothes. I let in some sunshine and got straight to work!
It took a good hour of feeling disoriented in the piece before it kicked in. In the beginning I am careful, I am trying to plan my strokes, I am using a very lightly pigmented transparent glaze of paint. Then I hit my stride, and I pretty much feel that the muse/my training/something else pretty visceral takes over and I just let it ride.
Suddenly I felt like I needed some water and to stretch a little bit. It was already 2:00! I had been purposely ignoring my phone so I went to check it and OOPS I had left it behind at Bf's house. I was fine with that and figured I'd finish my day's work and ride back to his house and bother him.
He beat me to it. He came over with my phone and plenty of kisses at around 3:00. I was still working so I just kept going while he told me about his day. I actually like having him around me while I'm making art. That has never happened to me before! I even invite him over to look at my composition and contrast. It's weird. I used to be such a tyrant when I was working and when I was drinking. I was so irritable and so nasty. I had a much harder time getting started and any interruption was just so stressful for me and my attention span was so fragile. I can't believe how much I can actually contain in my brain now. I really ws a mess. I mean, I was in heavy trauma and I was drinking. And I'm much calmer now.
Anyway, I did get a lot of work done today. On to the next step!
I kissed Bf goodbye and rode my bike to the Pancake House (I always have to do one thing outside the studio -- and food related -- before work so I don't get restless or distracted), and stepped right into my pajamas/painting clothes. I let in some sunshine and got straight to work!
It took a good hour of feeling disoriented in the piece before it kicked in. In the beginning I am careful, I am trying to plan my strokes, I am using a very lightly pigmented transparent glaze of paint. Then I hit my stride, and I pretty much feel that the muse/my training/something else pretty visceral takes over and I just let it ride.
Suddenly I felt like I needed some water and to stretch a little bit. It was already 2:00! I had been purposely ignoring my phone so I went to check it and OOPS I had left it behind at Bf's house. I was fine with that and figured I'd finish my day's work and ride back to his house and bother him.
He beat me to it. He came over with my phone and plenty of kisses at around 3:00. I was still working so I just kept going while he told me about his day. I actually like having him around me while I'm making art. That has never happened to me before! I even invite him over to look at my composition and contrast. It's weird. I used to be such a tyrant when I was working and when I was drinking. I was so irritable and so nasty. I had a much harder time getting started and any interruption was just so stressful for me and my attention span was so fragile. I can't believe how much I can actually contain in my brain now. I really ws a mess. I mean, I was in heavy trauma and I was drinking. And I'm much calmer now.
Anyway, I did get a lot of work done today. On to the next step!
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,745
Oh! The end of the story! I forgot.
SO, when I finished my work, Bf gave me my phone, and I opened up the messages and I had 23 texts from my coworkers begging me to work tonight and I was the ONLY one who could cover this shift. And everyone was wondering where I was alllllllll daaaayyyyyyy!
I am SO glad that I didn't have my phone on me all day, when I had such a rare alignment and such a perfect set of factors for a perfect studio day. I was able to have a serious and productive work day with nothing invading my thoughts or stressing me out. Somehow it ALSO worked out that my phone was misplaced just before people started trying to find me! If I had known that people wanted me to work, I would have felt rushed and squashed and I would not have painted today.
After all this, I did call work and was able to tag my coworker out and send her home to rest. And I was just on time. And I did not miss out on a thing. Can't believe it
SO, when I finished my work, Bf gave me my phone, and I opened up the messages and I had 23 texts from my coworkers begging me to work tonight and I was the ONLY one who could cover this shift. And everyone was wondering where I was alllllllll daaaayyyyyyy!
I am SO glad that I didn't have my phone on me all day, when I had such a rare alignment and such a perfect set of factors for a perfect studio day. I was able to have a serious and productive work day with nothing invading my thoughts or stressing me out. Somehow it ALSO worked out that my phone was misplaced just before people started trying to find me! If I had known that people wanted me to work, I would have felt rushed and squashed and I would not have painted today.
After all this, I did call work and was able to tag my coworker out and send her home to rest. And I was just on time. And I did not miss out on a thing. Can't believe it
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What an awesome story, Plenny ~ I love when everything lines up together in our favor. And you still saved the day! Plenny the Superhero! 
Thanks MB for explaining the "inches" ~ that's something I need to work on. I get so impatient wanting something to be done, that I feel rushed & then suffer from "paralysis by analysis"....so nothing gets even started! Gotta remember baby steps....and not drink! Ugh....
Thanks MB for explaining the "inches" ~ that's something I need to work on. I get so impatient wanting something to be done, that I feel rushed & then suffer from "paralysis by analysis"....so nothing gets even started! Gotta remember baby steps....and not drink! Ugh....
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,745
I did it y'all, I finished a piece. Not only on time but a week early! And, not crunching or feeling rushed at all. I looked at the calendar and it took exactly 3 weeks, from the first preliminary drawings to completion. That's with my full time job and my Bf and plenty of slack off time too, btw. But that's pretty good for me!
Aside from just marvelling at my sober efficiency, It really felt so good to just be able to access my skills and access the muse, without sifting and trudging through so much fog and low self esteem and grief I give myself. I felt that I had the facility to make a beautiful piece of art and there was nothing blocking me.
Unfortunately the victory of finishing a piece is a huge trigger for me to "celebrate" in some way. So, I'm going to fix myself something to eat and watch some tv and enjoy a clear head with no obligations.
And that is what being an artist in recovery is all about.
Aside from just marvelling at my sober efficiency, It really felt so good to just be able to access my skills and access the muse, without sifting and trudging through so much fog and low self esteem and grief I give myself. I felt that I had the facility to make a beautiful piece of art and there was nothing blocking me.
Unfortunately the victory of finishing a piece is a huge trigger for me to "celebrate" in some way. So, I'm going to fix myself something to eat and watch some tv and enjoy a clear head with no obligations.
And that is what being an artist in recovery is all about.
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,745
Well, the painting was delivered, and the recipients are very very happy. It actually became part of a very meaningful moment that they had together. I am so moved that my work can mean so much to someone, and I am beyond flattered and honored.
They are a couple who have been through so much together. They were drunk together and they got sober together. They are both really awesome artists, and they have great taste. I can't believe that they picked me for this very piece that I just finished. Really amazing reward for being true to my process and staying committed. It's really an amazing feeling
They are a couple who have been through so much together. They were drunk together and they got sober together. They are both really awesome artists, and they have great taste. I can't believe that they picked me for this very piece that I just finished. Really amazing reward for being true to my process and staying committed. It's really an amazing feeling
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