Class of September 2016 Part 3
Living the life
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,211
Oooh I knew I forgot to mention something. I had my monthly women's retiree's luncheon yesterday and this is the first one I've been to for a variety of reasons (mostly flood related) since June. So this is the first one I've been to sober and I was a little nervous about it because some of my drinking buddies are part of this group. Well as it turns out the usual suspects didn't turn up so not a single person was drinking. I fit right in drinking my lemon water 
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,618
Originally Posted by HelenofTroy 
Oooh I knew I forgot to mention something. I had my monthly women's retiree's luncheon yesterday and this is the first one I've been to for a variety of reasons (mostly flood related) since June. So this is the first one I've been to sober and I was a little nervous about it because some of my drinking buddies are part of this group. Well as it turns out the usual suspects didn't turn up so not a single person was drinking. I fit right in drinking my lemon water
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,618
Originally Posted by ReadyAtLast
Hi windancer, i'm sorry I've only just seen your post and hope you are asleep now.
My take on this is that you are doing the best you can. I don't want you to think I'm criticizing AA as it works well for many people but I do not like the concept of having to go to a meeting every day. Of course, if this is possible and works for people then great, do it. But for many who have restrictions, ie work, no license distance, family and other commitments it isn't always possible.
I think making you feel guilty and ashamed is very poor. You felt bad and felt a need to lie which makes you feel even worse. I 'm sure she's doing what she thinks is best but this isn't necessarily what is best for you.
We're all adults here, albeit with problems and difficulties, and I just don't like the idea of another adult shaming us, telling us off as though we are naughty children,making us sneak around and tell lies.
If I were you I would be honest with her.Say you do the best you can, you can't always do every day, you do not want to be in a position where you feel guilt and shame and feel the need to lie. It's up to her what she then does with it.
I hope this comes across in the spirit it's meant to. In no way am I criticizing AA. I just think recovery is so personal. Of course we need additonal support but we don't need to be criticized for something really outside our control ( inability to get to the meeting) and then be driven to a point of lying, guilt, fear, anxiety and worry - all of which are the behaviours we are tryin to get away from.
I hope when you read this you've managed to get a decent sleep and feel better
RAL
My take on this is that you are doing the best you can. I don't want you to think I'm criticizing AA as it works well for many people but I do not like the concept of having to go to a meeting every day. Of course, if this is possible and works for people then great, do it. But for many who have restrictions, ie work, no license distance, family and other commitments it isn't always possible.
I think making you feel guilty and ashamed is very poor. You felt bad and felt a need to lie which makes you feel even worse. I 'm sure she's doing what she thinks is best but this isn't necessarily what is best for you.
We're all adults here, albeit with problems and difficulties, and I just don't like the idea of another adult shaming us, telling us off as though we are naughty children,making us sneak around and tell lies.
If I were you I would be honest with her.Say you do the best you can, you can't always do every day, you do not want to be in a position where you feel guilt and shame and feel the need to lie. It's up to her what she then does with it.
I hope this comes across in the spirit it's meant to. In no way am I criticizing AA. I just think recovery is so personal. Of course we need additonal support but we don't need to be criticized for something really outside our control ( inability to get to the meeting) and then be driven to a point of lying, guilt, fear, anxiety and worry - all of which are the behaviours we are tryin to get away from.
I hope when you read this you've managed to get a decent sleep and feel better
RAL
. I totally understand what you are saying. Part of what has turned me off AA in the past is the attitude that we are to just do as we are told and not question anything ... well, I have a problem with that. I'm not part of the sheeple herd. I "Take what I can use and leave the rest" when it comes to AA. Often I do have to filter a lot of stuff out, but the pearls of wisdom I find (after they are washed off and translated into something that fits with my spiritual truths) are well worth it. And the fellowship is worth it. Some have suggested I am "manipulating the program". I wholeheartedly disagree. I am making it work for me, which after reading a heap of AA literature, seems to be what was indeed intended in the first place. I did tell the sponsor the truth and she just laughed and said it's common in recovering alcoholics to lie without intending to because we did it so much in active addiction. I didn't have a conversation about the frequency of meetings but I decided that if I didn't want to attend one night, next time I will just say that I am not going today. End of story. AA is a tool in my toolbox. It isn't my whole life, and I am aware that I need and want a life outside of AA too. I think a healthy balance is key
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,618
Originally Posted by MyLoves
Windancer how are you today?
I was good but busy yesterday! I am starting to sleep better which is a bonus. I am well today too! My structure is finally coming!
Thanks for thinking about me .. it means the world to me MBS Check in: I feel mentally dull, physically motivated, and slightly excited spiritually.
Wishing everyone a sober day!
~Blessings~
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Southern Cali
Posts: 1,356
30 days woo hoo! thank you Helen for saying that before I even posted lol. I'll probably go to a meeting in the next few days. I still have a 30 day chip from before.. I don't actively participate in AA anymore but I do like hitting up meetings now and then to be around others like me and to check out of my head for a while . Good luck with your set up today Wind, I know you're excited! . Have a great day/evening all!
thank you Helen for saying that before I even posted lol. I'll probably go to a meeting in the next few days. I still have a 30 day chip from before.. I don't actively participate in AA anymore but I do like hitting up meetings now and then to be around others like me and to check out of my head for a while . Good luck with your set up today Wind, I know you're excited! . Have a great day/evening all!
Living the life
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,211
CAGY I doubt they are interviewing all 91 applicants. They saw something they liked in your application.
I just made an observation. My recycling box is full, but now it's full of empty sparking water bottles and cans - not booze paraphernalia. It made me smile
I just made an observation. My recycling box is full, but now it's full of empty sparking water bottles and cans - not booze paraphernalia. It made me smile
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Stressful day
Today has been a mess. Husband had to work and I was in a very bad mood and state to be home with the kids (they closed all schools because of the hurricane.) So I spent all morning screaming at them and all afternoon packing and as I type this I am wedged between two car seats as we drive southwest to avoid Hurricane Matthew who is supposed to hit us tomorrow. My toddler wants to nurse and has been very hard to entertain on this road trip (we are on our fifth hour and it's torture.)
This is the type of day that would drive me to drink. I am not going to but I surely gave into the food AV and now I hate myself for eating crap and treating my body like a garbage can. Stress eating at its finest. It's hard not knowing what kind of state our house will be in when we get back. Trying not to think about it anymore and hoping that the storm changes its course.
If anyone else is in florida- stay safe and please check in.
This is the type of day that would drive me to drink. I am not going to but I surely gave into the food AV and now I hate myself for eating crap and treating my body like a garbage can. Stress eating at its finest. It's hard not knowing what kind of state our house will be in when we get back. Trying not to think about it anymore and hoping that the storm changes its course.
If anyone else is in florida- stay safe and please check in.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 2,332
Congrats on day 10 MyLoves and Angie!
Congrats on day 24 Windancer!
Helen, I will have to try the Izze blackberry water. The water I ordered wasn't that great but you never know until you try it I guess. I am happy your luncheon went well
Congrats on 30 days CAGY! Great job Sending good vibes your way for the job interview.
I am sorry you are having a bad day Sunflowerlife, but I am glad you are not drinking. Praying you & everyone in Florida stays safe.
Day 9
It is cold here today, it feels like Winter is coming. Not much new here, still here and still sober. I am going to try to make it an early night, I feel good but kind of run down. I think I just need some sleep.
Happy Friday everyone~
Congrats on day 24 Windancer!
Helen, I will have to try the Izze blackberry water. The water I ordered wasn't that great but you never know until you try it I guess. I am happy your luncheon went well
Congrats on 30 days CAGY! Great job
Sending good vibes your way for the job interview. I am sorry you are having a bad day Sunflowerlife, but I am glad you are not drinking. Praying you & everyone in Florida stays safe.
Day 9
It is cold here today, it feels like Winter is coming. Not much new here, still here and still sober
. I am going to try to make it an early night, I feel good but kind of run down. I think I just need some sleep. Happy Friday everyone~
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 76
Wow cravings again today! I had a psych appointment, which may have triggered me, but I am still in shock of how strong these cravings are. I actually stopped at the store with every intention of buying alcohol today. I had to carry my baby inside with me and as I looked down at her innocently sleeping, I decided to buy some candy instead. So here I sit, eating candy and the little one fast asleep. This is exactly as it should be. I feel so guilty for even having the intent of drinking today!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Lakeside, Arizona
Posts: 1,138
Originally Posted by Elfie312
Wow cravings again today! I had a psych appointment, which may have triggered me, but I am still in shock of how strong these cravings are. I actually stopped at the store with every intention of buying alcohol today. I had to carry my baby inside with me and as I looked down at her innocently sleeping, I decided to buy some candy instead. So here I sit, eating candy and the little one fast asleep. This is exactly as it should be. I feel so guilty for even having the intent of drinking today!
good job on resisting the AV! Don't feel guilty for beating it! The AV will lose power the more it's denied. It's sneaky and gets in there pretending to be you.
CNGY, Congrats on 30 days! I'll hit it next week but made it 56 earlier this summer so I still have some ground to make up before I feel like I've accomplished something.
I'm actually not having cravings this time around, every other time I tried to stop they nearly drove me mad. Instead I'm left with a foggy head and the occasional headache. I can't wait for the mush to clear out, I don't think I felt this foggy the other time I stopped but withdrawals were worse across the board.
Sending thoughts out to all the folks out there in the path of the storm!
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
Posts: 2,435
I meant to share this yesterday but I was getting a Diet Coke yesterday at the local 7/11 and the guy behind the counter asked me "no beer?" *sigh*. That was my usual place to get it too. I'm very glad there was no one behind me and he's pretty soft spoken anyway. This is not the first time I've been asked that, there was one other time years ago with a very loud person ringing me up and plenty of people behind me. He asked, "no beer, no vodka?" I rarely purchased vodka but that doesn't matter. I was mortified. He got into trouble for it too because the manager of the store was right there. He embarrassed me so much but I felt bad for him in a way too for getting in trouble. Yesterday, didn't bother me too much but it was like ahhhh, he remembers I bought beer but I got over it pretty quickly. I just said nope I don't need that stuff and smiled.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,097
Morning all,
Quick check in.
Good luck on job interview CAGY
Hope all ok sunflower.Thinking of you and all in Florida.
Balance is definitely key in recovery windancer. It's what works for you, not other people that matters.
good stuff on resisting the AV Elfie
Best wishes to all, will check in properly at weekend.
happy sober Friday.x
Quick check in.
Good luck on job interview CAGY
Hope all ok sunflower.Thinking of you and all in Florida.
Balance is definitely key in recovery windancer. It's what works for you, not other people that matters.
good stuff on resisting the AV Elfie
Best wishes to all, will check in properly at weekend.
happy sober Friday.x
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 371
Originally Posted by HelenofTroy
I just made an observation. My recycling box is full, but now it's full of empty sparking water bottles and cans - not booze paraphernalia. It made me smile
Its been 42 days here. Body is feeling great. My mind not so much. I was I wasn't thinking about drinking so much. I just want to sit down and enjoy one. It needs to get out of my head. Sounds stupid but its almost exhausting. I would love to dedicate some time to thinking about other stuff.
Have a great day everyone.
Living the life
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,211
Good morning folks
I am still here, on day whatever lol. I have another thread going about counting days.
Windancer I wish I could see your project - it sounds so interesting and exciting.
Whiskeybent I am currently at a place where I am not thinking about the booze much. I know checking in here daily is helping with that. I love the camaraderie.
I have had a waterbed forever and decided after my recent flood that this is as good a time as any to get rid of it. A waterbed is a major pain in the butt because you can't move it if you want to paint or anything like that. My bedroom had to be emptied to have the flooring replaced so I got the bed drained and removed the mattress. It is one of those waterbeds with two rows of drawers underneath. The hobby woodworker in me wants the matress frame as wood for a potential future project, but I didn't know what to do with the drawers and was just going to scrap them.The restoration folks had set up a big storage container in the driveway for all my belongings and they stacked the four separate sections of drawers on top of each other. I was looking at it wondering if someone could use it when it dawned on me - it looked like a large dresser and it was almost the exact dimensions of the folding table I use as a cutting table in my sewing room! I have plastic pipe cut to extend the legs of that table to raise it to kitchen counter height (less bending = less achy back), and the stacked drawers were the same length, width and within an inch of the height. Jackpot!
So last night I was busy cutting and installing a top and back for my new cutting table and emptying boxes putting things away in the drawers. This made me so happy on so many levels; the cheap bastard in me was happy that I have a very functional cutting table for free, the tool-loving side of me was happy to be making sawdust, and the crafting side of me is so happy to have a proper place to keep all my sewing and crafting supplies. It won't be long now before the sewing room is usable again.
So today's plan is more organizing. Wishing everyone a great day, and strength and courage for all those dealing with the fallout from Michael.
I am still here, on day whatever lol. I have another thread going about counting days.
Windancer I wish I could see your project - it sounds so interesting and exciting.
Whiskeybent I am currently at a place where I am not thinking about the booze much. I know checking in here daily is helping with that. I love the camaraderie.
I have had a waterbed forever and decided after my recent flood that this is as good a time as any to get rid of it. A waterbed is a major pain in the butt because you can't move it if you want to paint or anything like that. My bedroom had to be emptied to have the flooring replaced so I got the bed drained and removed the mattress. It is one of those waterbeds with two rows of drawers underneath. The hobby woodworker in me wants the matress frame as wood for a potential future project, but I didn't know what to do with the drawers and was just going to scrap them.The restoration folks had set up a big storage container in the driveway for all my belongings and they stacked the four separate sections of drawers on top of each other. I was looking at it wondering if someone could use it when it dawned on me - it looked like a large dresser and it was almost the exact dimensions of the folding table I use as a cutting table in my sewing room! I have plastic pipe cut to extend the legs of that table to raise it to kitchen counter height (less bending = less achy back), and the stacked drawers were the same length, width and within an inch of the height. Jackpot!
So last night I was busy cutting and installing a top and back for my new cutting table and emptying boxes putting things away in the drawers. This made me so happy on so many levels; the cheap bastard in me was happy that I have a very functional cutting table for free, the tool-loving side of me was happy to be making sawdust, and the crafting side of me is so happy to have a proper place to keep all my sewing and crafting supplies. It won't be long now before the sewing room is usable again.
So today's plan is more organizing. Wishing everyone a great day, and strength and courage for all those dealing with the fallout from Michael.
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