Briar

Don't punish yourself for how you feel right now. Being brave doesn't mean you don't have fear and apprehension, it means you feel those things and then go do it anyway. And that's exactly what you're going to do. (((V)))

venuscat

Thank you ♥

Dee74

Best wishes for tomorrow Venus - everything will be ok



D

Stewy84

Hope all goes well Venus.

Thanks for such a brilliant welcome guys

JL2014

Briars on the money with this.
V I'm rooting for you ! Good thoughts and prayers for you-

JL2014

Day 6. Been really hard- from external pressures, money, spouse, teenager up for holidays. Just realizing I thought about drinking every single day. Gotta get stress off me.

countrygirl2014

Good morning. I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, so I'm all over SR trying to correct my attitude. This is one of those irritating character defects of alcoholism. I always hear "you can change your day just by changing you thought process...just start over!" I am mentally sticking my tongue out at AA and all suggestions right now. I didn't get my way. I was able to deal with it for two days and when my significant other left this morning and still no intimacy, I got angry. I'm trying to talk myself out of my selfish funk, but now my daughter is up and she is being a dramatic pain in the butt. She isn't allowed to watch TV until she puts her toys away so she huffing and puffing and throwing her little kid body all around because she is bored. I'm going to scream and punch walls in a minute.

Jennifer

Arbor

Good luck today Venus. I know things will all go well. Life throws us some major hurdles. We come out stronger on the other side. Thinking of you today :hugs:

countrygirl2014

Good luck Venus!!!

Jennifer

Conquest

This is so true! Taking care of business soberly shows so much courage and strength, Venus. Lots of love your way today my sweet friend.

Briar

Jen - don't be hard on yourself. Relationships and kids are so hard. Sometimes I'm amazed my marriage (and my kid! ) has survived so long. Do you feel like it would help for you guys to talk again? If you're still feeling like this, maybe the issue isn't resolved yet.

JL - I'm sorry you're dealing with so many stressors. Can you parse out what you can realistically control and what you can't? Make a chart? Then try not to worry as much about the things you can't contol? I know that's hard. I tend to believe I have superpowers when it comes to solving problems and just am not using them. Usually that's not the case. Try to be realistic.

I had another awful dream of being rejected for being sober. I was with a group of really cool people (like a band or something), and there was a guy I was smitten with, and he seemed to like me too (I know, right? What am I, 16 again? Pretty much). But when I told him I don't drink, he got really mad, and he and all his friends started berating me. It was stupid dream, but it upset me anyway. Obviously this is an area of major insecurity for me.

My walking buddy will be here shortly for our 4 mile walk. I haven't walked in a week as I've had a cold, so this will probably hurt. Oh well, it's worth it.

Briar

You get your son home ok, FAD?

countrygirl2014

Thank you briar. Sometimes he is smarter than me. He came in with about 200 dollars worth of groceries. Without me even asking. He also explained he can already tell I'm having a rough day. I hate this early recovery sometimes. Thankfully not all the time. I fight through the nasty stuff. It can't last forever.

Jennifer

Briar

I'm glad your day is looking up, Jen.

Mark1014

Sure did. He woke up today throwing up though. I went to Walgreen and got some nausea meds for him. I'm hoping it's something he ate rather than a virus. He's gonna move to NYC this summer, but he's still such a kid when it comes to things like being sick. But us guys are usually that way I guess.

That's a good point about sorting out things you can control from things you can't as far as stressors go. Reading JL and CG's posts reminds me that there will ALWAYS be something to bring stress. There seem to be seasons when stressors are more relentless, but they're always gonna be there...such is life. We all have to figure out how to constructively deal with them sans alcohol. No exceptions. Most days I think I'm making progress and then there are those when bedtime can't get here fast enough. Guess that's normal...tiresome, but normal.

I think it's about six in the morning on Monday in Melbourne, so V should be getting her surgery behind her pretty soon. Thinking of her lots today just like y'all I'm sure.

Briar

Oh my god, my three year old is driving me crazy!!! She is testing every single boundary just to see what will happen, and I'm running out of punishments. I tell her not to do something, and she just smiles at me and does it. On and on with this BS today. Now she's in her room holloring "my mommy's so mean! It's not fair!" I can't believe how much time I spend dealing with this, I can't get anything done! This is madness!

Mark1014

We used to call those episodes meltdowns. They were to carry on with those in the comfort of their own room.

BTW, our kitchen is smelling like turkey chili. Used your recipe and just set the timer to simmer an hour or so.

Briar

Well, that's definitely where she ended up. She's my only kid, so this is new to me, kinda figuring it out as I go along. She's lucky she's so damn cute, it's the only thing that saves her sometimes.

Sorry to hear your son's not feeling well. I hope it passes quickly (and not to you).

I hope the chili turns out well. I'm working on a pot of chicken noodle soup, and my husband is peeling apples for apple crisp. I just made my favorite chicken quinoa salad for weekday lunches. My daughter is howling from her time-out spot on the stairs because she can't stay out of trouble for more than a minute. The cat sneaks a bite of chicken every time I turn my back. It's chaos, but at least I'm sober!

Arbor

Sobers always better right Briar?! You can handle it all so much better. AND actually learn something. Win! Win!

Mark1014

You said it brother! And I like win wins!

Well, last hurrah on the holiday sweets in the oven. Maple baked pears again....and a scoop of vanilla bean ice cream on the side. Have been thinking about a six pack today (abs that is). It's been a few years since I sported one of those. The diet is pretty meticulous for a dude my age to accomplish, but gotta focus my energy some where, and I guess a little frivolous vanity is ok! That'll keep my sweet tooth shut down. It can keep my av company.

Hoping to hear from V as soon as she can get in touch.

Arbor, looks like a winter blast for your neck of the woods coming up. A couple of nights around 18 degrees predicted here. That's pretty cold for us....beach weather for y'all I'm sure.