Class of September 2013 - Part 31
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 776
~~Food For Thought ~ Sensational Sunday Edition~~
~~Everyday is Special ~ Be Grateful~~
Everything changes when we begin the day, the activity, any moment conscious of gratitude and of grace. Rich in gratitude, we can be far less frightened...far more appreciative. It's gratitude that allows us to be more live, more subtle, less opinionated but surer of what matters. It's also gratitude that connects us most deeply to what is around us...on which, on whom we entirely depend. Every day is a special day.
As each new day dawns, let your mind turn to someone you can appreciate even more sincerely and consciously, someone whose immediate wellbeing is influenced by your moods and attitudes. What greater gift can you offer than your renewed awareness that they are doing their best? Affirm that. Speak up about what's going right. Express your gratitude and forget the rest. Your own happiness will soar. So will your self-respect.
To listen well, you must be ready to HEAR what others are telling you. That means making your own mind quiet. And setting aside your assumptions that what you think or have to say is far more important. Listening with a receptive mind, your relationships flourish. Your world becomes far more interesting.
LISTEN to the small, quiet voice within that only ever guides you with love and compassion. Let yourself receive the inspiration of beauty and kindness. Let yourself rediscover peace in your heart. And, from that secure place, meet whatever comes.
By Stephanie Dowrick.
~~Everyday is Special ~ Be Grateful~~
Everything changes when we begin the day, the activity, any moment conscious of gratitude and of grace. Rich in gratitude, we can be far less frightened...far more appreciative. It's gratitude that allows us to be more live, more subtle, less opinionated but surer of what matters. It's also gratitude that connects us most deeply to what is around us...on which, on whom we entirely depend. Every day is a special day.
As each new day dawns, let your mind turn to someone you can appreciate even more sincerely and consciously, someone whose immediate wellbeing is influenced by your moods and attitudes. What greater gift can you offer than your renewed awareness that they are doing their best? Affirm that. Speak up about what's going right. Express your gratitude and forget the rest. Your own happiness will soar. So will your self-respect.
To listen well, you must be ready to HEAR what others are telling you. That means making your own mind quiet. And setting aside your assumptions that what you think or have to say is far more important. Listening with a receptive mind, your relationships flourish. Your world becomes far more interesting.
LISTEN to the small, quiet voice within that only ever guides you with love and compassion. Let yourself receive the inspiration of beauty and kindness. Let yourself rediscover peace in your heart. And, from that secure place, meet whatever comes.
By Stephanie Dowrick.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Originally Posted by GotGrace 
Hello, all.
We have been home from our vacation for 5 days; we were supposed to get home yesterday! My daughter was admitted to the hospital here for 2 days to get her diabetes under control and for us to be educated. We are home, going on day 3, and it has been a roller coaster ride. Everyone tells us it will get easier and I am clinging to that.
I have stayed sober. Whenever the thought of a drink flits through I quickly realize how much worse drinking would make it. The guilt and shame; I just couldn't handle that on top of everything else I am feeling right now.
I have been reading the posts and I love seeing Melina back and Fish checking in! Hugs to both of you. BLK, thanks for letting us walk through this time with you. Everyone else, love to you as well.
We have been home from our vacation for 5 days; we were supposed to get home yesterday! My daughter was admitted to the hospital here for 2 days to get her diabetes under control and for us to be educated. We are home, going on day 3, and it has been a roller coaster ride. Everyone tells us it will get easier and I am clinging to that.
I have stayed sober. Whenever the thought of a drink flits through I quickly realize how much worse drinking would make it. The guilt and shame; I just couldn't handle that on top of everything else I am feeling right now.
I have been reading the posts and I love seeing Melina back and Fish checking in! Hugs to both of you. BLK, thanks for letting us walk through this time with you. Everyone else, love to you as well.
You all must be exuasted and overwhelmed. I hope it proves to be well-controlled and she can get back to her life.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Originally Posted by MrFixit63
Hello September buddies hope everyone is doing well I'm working at it here and there. My eye started getting better now the other eye is messing up I think it's being caused by my uncontrolled diabetes.
What's weird is controlling diabetes it's almost like trying to maintain sobriety its a hard job.
I wanna drink so I don't drink next thing you know Im eating two cheeseburgers and stealing some little kids french fries
What's weird is controlling diabetes it's almost like trying to maintain sobriety its a hard job.
I wanna drink so I don't drink next thing you know Im eating two cheeseburgers and stealing some little kids french fries
I am sorry you are having trouble with your eyes, still. I hope they can repair the other one too.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,534
Thanks, Rochele. It is a lot like having a newborn baby at home. You think it shouldn't take so much time, then suddenly it is 11 p.m. and there sit the dirt dishes, full laundry baskets, and the dog is looking at you expectantly, waiting for his walk.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Glasgow, UK
Posts: 362
GG, glad to hear you guys are back home. I'm sure as you guys get used to things a bit you will begin to settle into a routine. Good on you for not giving into the cravings. Other than the dog (if she's anything like my mum and dad's!) all those other chores can wait while you're dealing with the new stuff and making sure your daughter is okay 
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Glasgow, UK
Posts: 362
A message from a friend yesterday reminded me of why I'm walking the sober road.
She had a final class for her counselling course on Saturday morning and went out after to celebrate with her coursemates. She ended up having a few too many beers and being sick and finishing up with vomit in her hair. She text me yesterday morning to tell me she was feeling ill, ashamed and miserable and asking me if this was really the lasting impression she wanted to leave with her coursemates?
I of course have lots of sympathy - have been there, done that and got the t-shirt many, many times! But her text coming through at 10am on a Sunday while I was sitting in bed after a lie in drinking coffee and listening to music amade me realise this is the life that I need to be leading. Thinking of what she was feeling at that point was enough to terrify me...
She had a final class for her counselling course on Saturday morning and went out after to celebrate with her coursemates. She ended up having a few too many beers and being sick and finishing up with vomit in her hair. She text me yesterday morning to tell me she was feeling ill, ashamed and miserable and asking me if this was really the lasting impression she wanted to leave with her coursemates?
I of course have lots of sympathy - have been there, done that and got the t-shirt many, many times! But her text coming through at 10am on a Sunday while I was sitting in bed after a lie in drinking coffee and listening to music amade me realise this is the life that I need to be leading. Thinking of what she was feeling at that point was enough to terrify me...
Perpetual Optimist
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: LA
Posts: 1,371
Grace -
I'm so sorry for what you're going through.
My sister has diabetes. She's 20 and has been living with it since she was 5. I remember the summer we found out. It was scary and upsetting. There have been a lot of technological advances in terms of insulin regulation, my sister also went to diabetes camp every year for about five years.
The most important and difficult aspect of diabetes maintenance is the diet. My parents did a terrible job of instilling good eating habits in my sister and now she is having a tough time with her weight and also has food issues.
Apart from the occasional crisis, my sister has a normal life.
There are diabetes magazines (I get one every month) and lots of other literature. It's going to take some time to process everything, but soon it will become second nature. Getting sober is the best thing you could have done for her!
I'm so sorry for what you're going through.
My sister has diabetes. She's 20 and has been living with it since she was 5. I remember the summer we found out. It was scary and upsetting. There have been a lot of technological advances in terms of insulin regulation, my sister also went to diabetes camp every year for about five years.
The most important and difficult aspect of diabetes maintenance is the diet. My parents did a terrible job of instilling good eating habits in my sister and now she is having a tough time with her weight and also has food issues.
Apart from the occasional crisis, my sister has a normal life.
There are diabetes magazines (I get one every month) and lots of other literature. It's going to take some time to process everything, but soon it will become second nature. Getting sober is the best thing you could have done for her!
Perpetual Optimist
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: LA
Posts: 1,371
Friday concert was amazing! I reconnected with an old college friend whom I hadn't seen in 2 years (because my disease isolated me from a all non-pothead/alcoholics in that time frame). I danced my ass off and even though I was exhausted, I made it to a meeting afterward.
It was so nice to be able to enjoy the music without being preoccupied with going to the bar or getting caught smoking weed. I remained in the moment and remembered the evening!
I only wanted to punch one person in the face, and I would have wanted to punch him in the face (probably more so) if I had been drinking. This guy who was directly in my line of vision decided to hold his phone up and record every new song. So he was the only one not dancing and his phone was partially blocking my view of the stage.
That's one thing that pisses me off about social networking, it takes you out of the moment and his recordings took me out of the moment also.
Instead of confronting him, (which I was close to doing and probably would have done with some liquid courage) I talked myself into a calmer state and brought myself to a place of gratitude. The whole experience was a great sober reference!
It was so nice to be able to enjoy the music without being preoccupied with going to the bar or getting caught smoking weed. I remained in the moment and remembered the evening!
I only wanted to punch one person in the face, and I would have wanted to punch him in the face (probably more so) if I had been drinking. This guy who was directly in my line of vision decided to hold his phone up and record every new song. So he was the only one not dancing and his phone was partially blocking my view of the stage.
That's one thing that pisses me off about social networking, it takes you out of the moment and his recordings took me out of the moment also.
Instead of confronting him, (which I was close to doing and probably would have done with some liquid courage) I talked myself into a calmer state and brought myself to a place of gratitude. The whole experience was a great sober reference!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 776
~~Food For Thought ~ Thank God Its Monday Edition~~
~~Wishing~~
~Note~
Just a little sonnet to start the Monday journey. Njoy the day folks.
Do you wish the World were better?
Let me tell you what to do:
Set a watch upon your actions,
Keep them always straight and true.
Rid your mind of selfish motives,
Let your thoughts be clean and high.
You can make a little Eden
Of the sphere you occupy.
Do you wish the World were wiser?
Then suppose you make a start,
By accumulating wisdom
In the scrap book of your heart.
Do not waste on page on folly;
Live to learn and learn to live.
If you want to give men knowledge
You must get it ere you give.
Do you wish the world were happy?
Then remember day by day,
Just to scatter seeds of kindness,
As you pass along the way.
For the pleasures of the many
May be oft times traced to one.
As the hand that plants an acorn,
Shelters armies from the sun.
Ella Wheeler Wilcox
~~Wishing~~
~Note~
Just a little sonnet to start the Monday journey. Njoy the day folks.
Do you wish the World were better?
Let me tell you what to do:
Set a watch upon your actions,
Keep them always straight and true.
Rid your mind of selfish motives,
Let your thoughts be clean and high.
You can make a little Eden
Of the sphere you occupy.
Do you wish the World were wiser?
Then suppose you make a start,
By accumulating wisdom
In the scrap book of your heart.
Do not waste on page on folly;
Live to learn and learn to live.
If you want to give men knowledge
You must get it ere you give.
Do you wish the world were happy?
Then remember day by day,
Just to scatter seeds of kindness,
As you pass along the way.
For the pleasures of the many
May be oft times traced to one.
As the hand that plants an acorn,
Shelters armies from the sun.
Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Perpetual Optimist
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: LA
Posts: 1,371
4th Step Stuff
So I've begun working the 4th step, and here are some thoughts:
In the big book it says that we are driven by 3 primary instincts/desires: 1. The desire to be liked i.e. Accolades or a "pat on the back" 2. The desire for security i.e. Material rewards and 3. Sexual desire i.e. Orgasm
In doing my own inventory, I have come to realize (what I already knew) that 99% of my defects stem from the desire to be liked. For me it is character defect NÚMERO UNO!
I want to be the object of everyone's thoughts and adulation, always. When I don't get invited to something, even if I have no intention of going, I am hurt and become resentful.
When someone doesn't want to hang out with me, I am resentful- even if I don't want to hang out with them! In my mind, they should want to hang out with me anyway!
I also have issues in situations where I have not found personal closure. To me, closure means knowing the "how and why" of a situations outcome. I feel like I deserve those explanations regarding everything I do and have a hard time coming to terms with situations in which those things aren't explained.
I have not yet done a sexual or financial inventory, but those issues aren't as serious as my interpersonal inventory. I am interested to see what my sponsor thinks of this list (which is about 30-people-long)!
Ok enough procrastinating, time to write dialogue!!!
In the big book it says that we are driven by 3 primary instincts/desires: 1. The desire to be liked i.e. Accolades or a "pat on the back" 2. The desire for security i.e. Material rewards and 3. Sexual desire i.e. Orgasm
In doing my own inventory, I have come to realize (what I already knew) that 99% of my defects stem from the desire to be liked. For me it is character defect NÚMERO UNO!
I want to be the object of everyone's thoughts and adulation, always. When I don't get invited to something, even if I have no intention of going, I am hurt and become resentful.
When someone doesn't want to hang out with me, I am resentful- even if I don't want to hang out with them! In my mind, they should want to hang out with me anyway!
I also have issues in situations where I have not found personal closure. To me, closure means knowing the "how and why" of a situations outcome. I feel like I deserve those explanations regarding everything I do and have a hard time coming to terms with situations in which those things aren't explained.
I have not yet done a sexual or financial inventory, but those issues aren't as serious as my interpersonal inventory. I am interested to see what my sponsor thinks of this list (which is about 30-people-long)!
Ok enough procrastinating, time to write dialogue!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 776
Originally Posted by Renarde
I've now worked in enough hospitals and seen enough hospitalized alcoholics to know that the way out is recovery or death, and the death is slow and horrible. I hope we all continue to choose recovery!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 1,178
Originally Posted by Nightswimming
A message from a friend yesterday reminded me of why I'm walking the sober road.
She had a final class for her counselling course on Saturday morning and went out after to celebrate with her coursemates. She ended up having a few too many beers and being sick and finishing up with vomit in her hair. She text me yesterday morning to tell me she was feeling ill, ashamed and miserable and asking me if this was really the lasting impression she wanted to leave with her coursemates?
I of course have lots of sympathy - have been there, done that and got the t-shirt many, many times! But her text coming through at 10am on a Sunday while I was sitting in bed after a lie in drinking coffee and listening to music amade me realise this is the life that I need to be leading. Thinking of what she was feeling at that point was enough to terrify me...
She had a final class for her counselling course on Saturday morning and went out after to celebrate with her coursemates. She ended up having a few too many beers and being sick and finishing up with vomit in her hair. She text me yesterday morning to tell me she was feeling ill, ashamed and miserable and asking me if this was really the lasting impression she wanted to leave with her coursemates?
I of course have lots of sympathy - have been there, done that and got the t-shirt many, many times! But her text coming through at 10am on a Sunday while I was sitting in bed after a lie in drinking coffee and listening to music amade me realise this is the life that I need to be leading. Thinking of what she was feeling at that point was enough to terrify me...
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 1,178
Sorry I've been mia for a while ... I had a few friends from around the country stay with me from Wednesday until Sunday, and it was amazing. Unbelievable. Life-changing. I love love love these women!
And I'm still sober. And happy.
And I'm still sober.
And happy.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,534
Checking in from the ER, folks. My dad fell this evening and I am with him. I know not everyone here is a pray-er, but if you do pray, would you please lift my family and me up? Between a dog with cancer (kids don't know yet), my daughter with her new diagnosis, and my dad, I am kind of wondering what the heck is next. Hoping that the adage that bad luck comes in 3s is true, because I really don't think I can handle much more.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 776
Originally Posted by GotGrace
Checking in from the ER, folks. My dad fell this evening and I am with him. I know not everyone here is a pray-er, but if you do pray, would you please lift my family and me up? Between a dog with cancer (kids don't know yet), my daughter with her new diagnosis, and my dad, I am kind of wondering what the heck is next. Hoping that the adage that bad luck comes in 3s is true, because I really don't think I can handle much more.
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