Class of September 2013 - Part 11
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
Originally Posted by Plenny 
Hey y'all! Thanks for the encouragement. I cannot believe this -- upon arriving at this wedding, I spoke to three consecutive old friends from party days, who are all in AA. I cannot believe how lucky I am tonight. This is a great party. Xoxoxo
This is the stuff that makes life so interesting to me.
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
I miss AA and want to go back, but it means finding the time to do so. That's my excuse for not going back regularly yet. After work, I just want to veg out at home and not have to go anywhere. By the time meetings are ending around here, I'm getting ready to crawl into bed.
There is a conference next month though, and those are pretty good, so I think I will at least attend that. I'll see some old faces there and maybe that'll jump-start me into going back. There's a noon meeting not far from my work and there are plenty of weekend meetings, too, so I really could go to those.
I don't feel like I belong anywhere again now that I'm not drinking anymore.
There is a conference next month though, and those are pretty good, so I think I will at least attend that. I'll see some old faces there and maybe that'll jump-start me into going back. There's a noon meeting not far from my work and there are plenty of weekend meetings, too, so I really could go to those.
I don't feel like I belong anywhere again now that I'm not drinking anymore.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,303
Perpetual Optimist
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: LA
Posts: 1,371
Originally Posted by Renarde
I am starting to consider AA. I think I may look up some meetings in case I feel really vulnerable and need more support. Has anyone here done meetings?
I could see peace instead of this
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada, eh
Posts: 2,360
When I used to attend AA regularly, I had friends there and felt a real sense of community and belonging. The people I associated with were for the most part, interested in doing things to make their lives better and to become better people in sobriety. We used to get together for dinners out and coffee and visiting and things like board games. It was a lot of fun.
That was another lifetime. Ever since all those circumstances I mentioned before came together and I ended up without a home group anymore and people all drifted apart, and I ended up across the city, I haven't had that. I still bump into a couple of them now and then and that's always nice. I even saw two of them at the same time a few weeks ago and asked them what groups they were attending now.
That was another lifetime. Ever since all those circumstances I mentioned before came together and I ended up without a home group anymore and people all drifted apart, and I ended up across the city, I haven't had that. I still bump into a couple of them now and then and that's always nice. I even saw two of them at the same time a few weeks ago and asked them what groups they were attending now.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: northern ireland
Posts: 649
I am really enjoying AA gives me a purpose to stay off the drink at least till 8pm as I have to drive there. Then when I leave I come away with a sense of peace. Its great talking to people who understand how your mind works. I didn't think I was selfish but now I see that I=I S=Self M= Me (and of course at least a box of wine) that's how my alcoholism worked for my family. Lots of work to be done in my head
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: great white north
Posts: 270
Hi ...first time posting here since I got sober on Sept. 26/13. Plenny's post about running into ex-party mates made me smile. You are so blessed to have had that happen to you. It just shows you that there are no coincidences and that you were meant to all meet at this particular time.. all sober. I love stuff like this.
I have had to make new friends and it's been difficult throughout the five years I've been at this thinking that life was going to be boring without getting drunk. This is the reason I think that I haven't been able to do this consistently. But I'll tell ya lately I would pick 'boring' over getting drunk and being miserable any day of the week. I think this time it's really starting to click. This oldtimer that chaired one of my first AA meetings used to welcome back people who were done with doing their research. I think my 'research' is finally over.
Jo :o)
I have had to make new friends and it's been difficult throughout the five years I've been at this thinking that life was going to be boring without getting drunk. This is the reason I think that I haven't been able to do this consistently. But I'll tell ya lately I would pick 'boring' over getting drunk and being miserable any day of the week. I think this time it's really starting to click. This oldtimer that chaired one of my first AA meetings used to welcome back people who were done with doing their research. I think my 'research' is finally over.
Jo :o)
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 225
So interesting reading about your thoughts on AA meetings. I haven't tried anything like that yet; bit scared to be be honest. I've made it this far by reading Rational Recovery and being here on SR. This forum has been the biggest motivator for me. I also save quotes that inspire me and refer to them in times of temptation. They are cleverer than my AV.
Thank you EternalQ for reminding us how complicated things will get if we go back to drinking. I'm sorry the fellow quitters from your month are no longer here. But you have us and we love your input!
Have a peaceful Sunday everyone. I'm not working today; first day off for weeks. I think I might stay in my nightie all day, watch a DVD with my youngest and try this Icecream therapy everyone keeps talking about! And maybe make an apple crisp (we call it apple crumble here) to go with it. Xxx
Thank you EternalQ for reminding us how complicated things will get if we go back to drinking. I'm sorry the fellow quitters from your month are no longer here. But you have us and we love your input!
Have a peaceful Sunday everyone. I'm not working today; first day off for weeks. I think I might stay in my nightie all day, watch a DVD with my youngest and try this Icecream therapy everyone keeps talking about! And maybe make an apple crisp (we call it apple crumble here) to go with it. Xxx
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,044
Lommey
Glad to see that AA is working for you. Are you thinking of getting a sponsor ? I would suggest that when you do, let them be a 'temporary' sponsor until you decide that they are the right fit for you. Also get lots of phone numbers ! They will be happy to get your call (preferably when you're sober).
Glad to see that AA is working for you. Are you thinking of getting a sponsor ? I would suggest that when you do, let them be a 'temporary' sponsor until you decide that they are the right fit for you. Also get lots of phone numbers ! They will be happy to get your call (preferably when you're sober).
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,044
Clemence
Thanks for clearing that up. I stared at UI's photo and was wondering how it was different from a crumble.
Maybe AA can be your backup plan. Always useful to have one ! I go to AA during my witching hour just like lommey.
Thanks for clearing that up. I stared at UI's photo and was wondering how it was different from a crumble.
Maybe AA can be your backup plan. Always useful to have one ! I go to AA during my witching hour just like lommey.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,044
Lommey
I am doing the Steps now. Early days and my sponsor is deliberately taking it slow. It can take months or years to complete them. Or it can be quick depending on the individual.
I am not sure how it works in the UK but in Oz you choose your sponsor. Go to a few AA meetings and observe the members. Then see if there is someone who you think is a good fit, they have been sober for 2-3 years and have done the 10th Step, approach and ask if they would be willing to be your Sponsor. Alternatively, you can ask the chairperson who are the willing sponsors in the meeting, they may know. It's a bit like choosing a dancing partner
however, a big difference is that the sponsor must be the same gender as you. There are many stories of men preying on vulnerable women.
A good sponsor should be upfront and say that they will be your temporary sponsor or that the sponsorship will be for a trial period until you are comfortable with each other. If they don't say that, you should not be afraid to bring it up. Seasoned sponsors understand that sometimes there isn't a good fit and will end the relationship with no hard feelings. Remember it's all about you and maintaining your sobriety. The sponsor is there to firstly support you in gaining and maintaining sobriety, then to do the 12 steps. The sponsor knows that only too well !
Hope that helps
I am doing the Steps now. Early days and my sponsor is deliberately taking it slow. It can take months or years to complete them. Or it can be quick depending on the individual.
I am not sure how it works in the UK but in Oz you choose your sponsor. Go to a few AA meetings and observe the members. Then see if there is someone who you think is a good fit, they have been sober for 2-3 years and have done the 10th Step, approach and ask if they would be willing to be your Sponsor. Alternatively, you can ask the chairperson who are the willing sponsors in the meeting, they may know. It's a bit like choosing a dancing partner
however, a big difference is that the sponsor must be the same gender as you. There are many stories of men preying on vulnerable women. A good sponsor should be upfront and say that they will be your temporary sponsor or that the sponsorship will be for a trial period until you are comfortable with each other. If they don't say that, you should not be afraid to bring it up. Seasoned sponsors understand that sometimes there isn't a good fit and will end the relationship with no hard feelings. Remember it's all about you and maintaining your sobriety. The sponsor is there to firstly support you in gaining and maintaining sobriety, then to do the 12 steps. The sponsor knows that only too well !
Hope that helps
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 1,131
Originally Posted by jat14
Hi ...first time posting here since I got sober on Sept. 26/13. Plenny's post about running into ex-party mates made me smile. You are so blessed to have had that happen to you. It just shows you that there are no coincidences and that you were meant to all meet at this particular time.. all sober. I love stuff like this.
I have had to make new friends and it's been difficult throughout the five years I've been at this thinking that life was going to be boring without getting drunk. This is the reason I think that I haven't been able to do this consistently. But I'll tell ya lately I would pick 'boring' over getting drunk and being miserable any day of the week. I think this time it's really starting to click. This oldtimer that chaired one of my first AA meetings used to welcome back people who were done with doing their research. I think my 'research' is finally over.
Jo :o)
I have had to make new friends and it's been difficult throughout the five years I've been at this thinking that life was going to be boring without getting drunk. This is the reason I think that I haven't been able to do this consistently. But I'll tell ya lately I would pick 'boring' over getting drunk and being miserable any day of the week. I think this time it's really starting to click. This oldtimer that chaired one of my first AA meetings used to welcome back people who were done with doing their research. I think my 'research' is finally over.
Jo :o)
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 1,052
Good morning. It was great reading all the updates this morning. You all sound so strong. And welcome to the class jat! We are a little crazy but loveable.
I didn't know it was called apple crumble but that is actually a better name for it. Glad we figured that out.
My desire to drink and any action means doing that with the knowledge now and in defiance, rather than holding hands with denial. It's a different feeling.
Well said, Renarde.
I didn't know it was called apple crumble but that is actually a better name for it. Glad we figured that out.
Originally Posted by Renarde
My desire to drink and any action means doing that with the knowledge now and in defiance, rather than holding hands with denial. It's a different feeling.
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