LillianGish

I'm sorry everyone is struggling. I think the reason we are struggling, is because we are not committed to drinking anymore. If we were, there would be no problem. We'd be drinking.

You may not feel committed to sobriety, but I bet your feelings towards drinking feel a lot different than they used to.

So, in case anyone is worried about their commitment....it's in there, poking at you. It is to me at least. Drinking isn't ok with me anymore and that's why we feel bad when we think about drinking. That feeling is connected way deep in us too. Hang on to that friends. Protect it because there is no greater honor you can give yourself. Honor feels way better than a drink. Way better.

Fish's friend also has me thinking about the concept of Legacy. Who I am, who I want to be and how I want to be remembered by those closest to me.

There's something very cool about crafting a well-lived life. To make decisions by the sheer question of "is this a story I want told at my funeral?" If it isn't...it probably isn't a good idea! Wish I knew that sooner in life, but hey, got it now.

There's a power in crafting in your legacy. Takes away the sense of feeling like a victim, to feeling in control of your destiny. A legacy goes far beyond your life. It's a way to live on for many years to come. I want my children to tell stories about me when I'm gone. My friends, my employer, my sister. I want them to be proud of me. I want to be proud of me. When my life passes by my eyes at the end...I want it to be a page turner.

Soar high friends. You have it - all of you are about the bravest people I ever met.

phoebe64

So well put, Lillian, as usual! When I was very young, a teen, I had great strength in my resolve to live a better life than my mother, who was an alcoholic. Then, in my mid 20's, I forgave her, as I understood her internal struggles, without going into details. Then, as a mother, I found myself slipping into the same trap she had: self medication. I had been so judgemental of her as a child, and understading and compassionate later, as I forgave her, and ached for her hurts in life.

I need to be more understanding and forgiving of myself in the same way. We all really do try to do our best. Nobody decides to be a loser drunk. We struggle to cope with our reality. It is a journey.

I love your description of creating our legacy. Even if we were a terrible alcoholic, we can still make it right by recovering. Then, we will be remembered as being strong and overcoming obstacles in life.

I used to be so fat. I was. I hated it, and myself. I was so depressed. So many people are proud of me for changing that, and I am too. This is just one more layer on my journey. I am headed in the right direction. Alcohol is just a stronger pull, but I will get there. I will, and we will.

Renarde

Very insightful talk here tonight.


I bought ice cream.

If I get really desperate I'll find an AA meeting. Not drinking.

Kaneda8888

Well done, enjoy the ice cream ! You are doing so well, it is very impressive. Keep it up !

EternalQ

Good for you Renarde!

Btw folks the thanks button isn't working for everyone just so you know. I've been reading and thanking for days and then I go back and nothing I've thanked has my name under it. It's a tech glitch. Just fyi.

Uninvited

Good job Renarde. I also watched the boring tv sober (with ice cream). Cya tomorrow.

FishnHippy

I'm here and I am sober not sure that I want to be sober but I am

FishnHippy

As a friend recently suggested I'm going to keep swimming upstream but the current can get pretty strong . .

LillianGish

Yes, as Dory said in Finding Nemo..."Just keep swimming." The current can be very strong.

Think how strong and healthy YOU will be when you get there. :-)

I'm sorry about your friend. :-(

LillianGish

I am continually delighted with the therapeutic qualities of ice cream.

LillianGish

Rochele, these are beautiful thoughts. I think its so important to love yourself. Compassion is very healing.

((Hugs)))

Plenny

Yikes I've missed a lot as usual, this thread moves fast as a cook, I can't really check in very much when I'm super busy.

I'm exhausted. Next week will be the same. My boss is going out of town the week after and I am so happy both for her and for me! When she's off, I'm off
That works for good and for bad, I'm sure you can imagine. Freelancing can be nuts.

I hope you are all doing well

Love, Plenny

Plenny

Melina, or Madbird, did either of you mention earlier that you're a chef? Come out come out wherever you are!

FishnHippy

I think it's time for ice cream therapy

Plenny

Why does that work so well

Kaneda8888

Plenny

Didn't you know that ice cream solves everything ?

Plenny

Oh yes I have experienced the phenomenon. I have actually said, "please talk to me after I've had some ice cream."

But... WHY does it work so well

Clemence

Hi Plenny, I'm a chef as well. I too work long hours so find it hard keeping up with all the posts. But I wouldn't have made it this far without SR.

Renarde and Fish, well done for staying strong through such a hard day yesterday.

Lillian your post was beautiful. As I have done before, I copy and pasted it and put it where I can read it again. I have lots of inspirational quotes there to look at when the wicked AV starts whispering to me. Thankyou!

Have a good day everyone xxx

Kaneda8888

No idea but then again I've been taught not to question my Higher Power

workoholic

Good morning everyone, friday night should be over for all of us soon. When I am struggling with cravings I try to remember the drinking I did this summer, not just the worst mishaps but also that the buzz wasn't that great, not worth the mishaps. But some times I get terrible panic attacks and it's more a matter of holding on for dear sobriety and hiding at home.
The legacy concept is compelling idea and focuses on the positive of staying sober rather than the negative of drinking.

Oh, now it's time to put my laundy into the dryer...