Class Of September 2012 Part 7
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Coastal Massachusetts
Posts: 1,637
Originally Posted by drybuss 
WWG,
That used to make me sad too. I still get sad sometimes but it doesn't last. Look around at everyone else. Are they really all that great? Do you really want to be like everyone else? I don't! I don't want to be a slave to alcohol! I don't want to have beer be more important than my family! It was and many of the people around me didn't see it. They thought I was a great husband and father. Everyone thought I had the picture perfect life. I did not, it sucked. Now I drive by the bars in town on and see the same old trucks and cars every night and know many of them have wives at home trying to raise the kids without an effective father. Not everyone is like that but many are. Many more than I think anyone wants to admit. Be you WWG and do whats good for you! It's ok to be different.
Sorry for the rant I really hope it helps. i have been in the exact spot you are. It's like rewinding my life to the time I quit. Exactly like it!
God bless
That used to make me sad too. I still get sad sometimes but it doesn't last. Look around at everyone else. Are they really all that great? Do you really want to be like everyone else? I don't! I don't want to be a slave to alcohol! I don't want to have beer be more important than my family! It was and many of the people around me didn't see it. They thought I was a great husband and father. Everyone thought I had the picture perfect life. I did not, it sucked. Now I drive by the bars in town on and see the same old trucks and cars every night and know many of them have wives at home trying to raise the kids without an effective father. Not everyone is like that but many are. Many more than I think anyone wants to admit. Be you WWG and do whats good for you! It's ok to be different.
Sorry for the rant I really hope it helps. i have been in the exact spot you are. It's like rewinding my life to the time I quit. Exactly like it!
God bless
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Oconomowoc, WI
Posts: 86
You can and I believe you will. With the right plan and plenty of support with a little accountability there is no way to go but up my friend. Start looking for a trend instead of a success or failure view. More sober days than drunk days. Perhaps a chart with a nice arc towards sucess! You can do it, you are so close!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,247
Hey drybus...like you posts...WWG...you may not be like everyone else, if that is how you chose to view it. Is that so bad? Think about it...you may not be like everyone else, BUT you are like us! Your in good company!
Keep struggling Matthew, it is worth it! You will overcome.
Jim
Keep struggling Matthew, it is worth it! You will overcome.
Jim
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Coastal Massachusetts
Posts: 1,637
Originally Posted by soberjim
Hey drybus...like you posts...WWG...you may not be like everyone else, if that is how you chose to view it. Is that so bad? Think about it...you may not be like everyone else, BUT you are like us! Your in good company!
Keep struggling Matthew, it is worth it! You will overcome.
Jim
Keep struggling Matthew, it is worth it! You will overcome.
Jim
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Oconomowoc, WI
Posts: 86
In my opinion more people are like us than anyone would like to admit!
Mabey we are the lucky ones.
Mabey they are the ones missing out.
I think so!
I know I missed out on so much because I was drunk and not totaly there.
Oh well at least I won't continue to miss out.
I'm free now!
And you can be too!
Mabey we are the lucky ones.
Mabey they are the ones missing out.
I think so!
I know I missed out on so much because I was drunk and not totaly there.
Oh well at least I won't continue to miss out.
I'm free now!
And you can be too!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Indiana
Posts: 145
WWG, you can do this. Think positive. You are not a failure. Stay strong!
Maybe just quitting, and trying to stay quit, on your own, is not enough. I've heard that from many other alcoholics. Have you tried an AA meeting? They work for me. Turning my life over to my higher power, and the fellowship face to face with other alcoholics who truly understand and have walked these roads, is what I need to maintain my sobriety. I'm at day 72 today, and going strong!! Maybe AA is the thing you need to get you over the hump, and to stay there. ??
Hang in there,
Johnny
Maybe just quitting, and trying to stay quit, on your own, is not enough. I've heard that from many other alcoholics. Have you tried an AA meeting? They work for me. Turning my life over to my higher power, and the fellowship face to face with other alcoholics who truly understand and have walked these roads, is what I need to maintain my sobriety. I'm at day 72 today, and going strong!! Maybe AA is the thing you need to get you over the hump, and to stay there. ??
Hang in there,
Johnny
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Coastal Massachusetts
Posts: 1,637
Originally Posted by JohnnyOneDay
WWG, you can do this. Think positive. You are not a failure. Stay strong!
Maybe just quitting, and trying to stay quit, on your own, is not enough. I've heard that from many other alcoholics. Have you tried an AA meeting? They work for me. Turning my life over to my higher power, and the fellowship face to face with other alcoholics who truly understand and have walked these roads, is what I need to maintain my sobriety. I'm at day 72 today, and going strong!! Maybe AA is the thing you need to get you over the hump, and to stay there. ??
Hang in there,
Johnny
Maybe just quitting, and trying to stay quit, on your own, is not enough. I've heard that from many other alcoholics. Have you tried an AA meeting? They work for me. Turning my life over to my higher power, and the fellowship face to face with other alcoholics who truly understand and have walked these roads, is what I need to maintain my sobriety. I'm at day 72 today, and going strong!! Maybe AA is the thing you need to get you over the hump, and to stay there. ??
Hang in there,
Johnny
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Oconomowoc, WI
Posts: 86
Originally Posted by walkingwithgod
Way to go JohnnyOneDay, you are doing awesome. I have thought of AA, and my therapist thinks I should go. I am just too scared to go, and all I picture are a bunch of bums. I know that movies and tv had skewed my view of AA, but I am trying to do this on my own.
I didn't go to AA for the same reasons. I know I have the wrong idea about AA and the people there. I guess I have my own system that works for me. In the beginning it was alot of white knuckling but it got easier over time. Some days I resisted drinking second by second then minuite by minuite and finally day by day. It was tough! I did have support tho. I talked with my Dad alot, had support at work and saw a therapist. My wife was breast feeding so she didn't drink for the first 12 months of my sobriety. If I can do it so can you. Make a plan, have a backup plan and get more support.
7 Great picture, and you are doing great! very proud and happy for you.
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Originally Posted by walkingwithgod
Way to go JohnnyOneDay, you are doing awesome. I have thought of AA, and my therapist thinks I should go. I am just too scared to go, and all I picture are a bunch of bums. I know that movies and tv had skewed my view of AA, but I am trying to do this on my own.
I most certainly do not consider myself to be a bum, and you might just run into me there one day! Rest assured, I will be looking my best just to offset that stereotype.
You know what? I think you should go once. See what it's all about. Perhaps seeing other people who are more like you than you imagine will help you to accept that you are no skidrow fodder. You're just like lots and lots of other decent people with a problem with the drink.
Did you watch West Wing when it was on? There is a fantastic scene I would encourage you to go find on you tube. If you type in Leo McGarry alcohol, you will find one of the all-time best (and realistic) explanations of alcoholism I've ever encountered.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,247
Hey Obaldi,
Thanks for your post... I know I have a misconceived understanding of AA. I have never been and consider myself to be very private. That is part of the reason I have not gone the AA route.
I have friends on SR (yes even me, lol) who are dealing with their struggle by going to AA and they have told me the same thing. Wide range of people there in AA. It gives me lots to consider; especially when I read posts by folks like yourself who are having success with AA..
Jim
Thanks for your post... I know I have a misconceived understanding of AA. I have never been and consider myself to be very private. That is part of the reason I have not gone the AA route.
I have friends on SR (yes even me, lol) who are dealing with their struggle by going to AA and they have told me the same thing. Wide range of people there in AA. It gives me lots to consider; especially when I read posts by folks like yourself who are having success with AA..
Jim
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Coastal Massachusetts
Posts: 1,637
Originally Posted by Obladi
What???
I most certainly do not consider myself to be a bum, and you might just run into me there one day! Rest assured, I will be looking my best just to offset that stereotype.
You know what? I think you should go once. See what it's all about. Perhaps seeing other people who are more like you than you imagine will help you to accept that you are no skidrow fodder. You're just like lots and lots of other decent people with a problem with the drink.
Did you watch West Wing when it was on? There is a fantastic scene I would encourage you to go find on you tube. If you type in Leo McGarry alcohol, you will find one of the all-time best (and realistic) explanations of alcoholism I've ever encountered.
I most certainly do not consider myself to be a bum, and you might just run into me there one day! Rest assured, I will be looking my best just to offset that stereotype.
You know what? I think you should go once. See what it's all about. Perhaps seeing other people who are more like you than you imagine will help you to accept that you are no skidrow fodder. You're just like lots and lots of other decent people with a problem with the drink.
Did you watch West Wing when it was on? There is a fantastic scene I would encourage you to go find on you tube. If you type in Leo McGarry alcohol, you will find one of the all-time best (and realistic) explanations of alcoholism I've ever encountered.
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
I was kidding about being offended.
I'm fine, really.
And I'm sure not going to push you to go, seein as that would be hypocritical on my part since I don't go. But I do know that what you picture ain't what it is. That's my point - you have a hard time associating yourself in your mind with these imaginary people when you gotta know they are just like you and me.
Keep on keeping on, you (and I) will get this, I know it.
I'm fine, really.
And I'm sure not going to push you to go, seein as that would be hypocritical on my part since I don't go. But I do know that what you picture ain't what it is. That's my point - you have a hard time associating yourself in your mind with these imaginary people when you gotta know they are just like you and me.
Keep on keeping on, you (and I) will get this, I know it.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 896
I'm was like you WWG, I went to AA about 10 years ago and the preconceived ideas I had were blown away in a second, they really were a great bunch but I wasn't ready to change then. I haven't been this time, I've managed 40 days with the help of SR although I think I may need to step up a gear now.
Do what works for you but why not try an open meeting and take someone you trust with you. I think its allowed.
Do what works for you but why not try an open meeting and take someone you trust with you. I think its allowed.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 458
WWG - you got a lot of great advice from people here. Totally agree with them all. The only other thing I would suggest but Jimuk beat me to it 
Maybe try an open meeting first, all you have to do is sit and listen.
Another video you may want to check out on you tube...the story by comedian Craig Ferguson he talks about his struggle with alcohol. I give the guy a lot of credit for talking about it on his show. (and don't view it and say I wasn't that bad..so I must not have a problem..., he has a lot of good points towards the end of his story) Hang in there....
Maybe try an open meeting first, all you have to do is sit and listen. Another video you may want to check out on you tube...the story by comedian Craig Ferguson he talks about his struggle with alcohol. I give the guy a lot of credit for talking about it on his show. (and don't view it and say I wasn't that bad..so I must not have a problem..., he has a lot of good points towards the end of his story) Hang in there....
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Indiana
Posts: 145
WWG (and to others with misconceptions about the AA clientele),
It's certainly your choice and I'm not trying to influence you, and I know that AA is not the only way, but just to clarify......
If your city/area is anything like mine, you'll run into all types of people at AA meetings, but they are NOT a bunch of BUMS! And no, people there are not looking to swarm over newcomers and put them on the spot and embarrass them. You don't have to say a word if you don't want to. If you are embarrassed or shy, I would suggest a Speaker meeting. In those meetings, they do not go around the room and talk. You can just go and watch/listen to a speaker share their journey. I'm a shy, introverted person too, but I feel right at home at AA.
Some of the people I've met at AA meetings are:
As I've stated before, there are all kinds of AA meetings out there (speaker, discussion, Big Book, open, closed, etc.) . Your local schedule should identify the different types. (I have been to 68 meetings in 72 days.) Speaker meetings might be best for shy newcomers.
Oh, and I don't consider myself a bum either. Not to toot any horns, but I have a BS degree from a Big Ten university, and an MBA from a smaller mid-major. I have worked in management/engineering jobs throughout my 25 year career, with large and small manufacturing and service companies. But I'm a regular Joe too, and I'll give that factory guy or girl a hug at the meeting, because he/she understands my addiction and has been there. It's hard to explain unless you go to meetings and allow the fellowship to help you in your sobriety. I strongly suggest you at least try a meeting or two.... you have nothing to lose.
Johnny
It's certainly your choice and I'm not trying to influence you, and I know that AA is not the only way, but just to clarify......
If your city/area is anything like mine, you'll run into all types of people at AA meetings, but they are NOT a bunch of BUMS! And no, people there are not looking to swarm over newcomers and put them on the spot and embarrass them. You don't have to say a word if you don't want to. If you are embarrassed or shy, I would suggest a Speaker meeting. In those meetings, they do not go around the room and talk. You can just go and watch/listen to a speaker share their journey. I'm a shy, introverted person too, but I feel right at home at AA.
Some of the people I've met at AA meetings are:
- Police chief of a neighboring town
- Executive VP of Marketing for a large Fortune 500 company
- Elected Republican local county politician
- The father of one of my daughter's high-school friends
- A referree who works lots of local youth and high-school sports (baseball ump, football, etc.). He's a personal friend of mine.
- Many many people with college degrees and white-collar jobs
As I've stated before, there are all kinds of AA meetings out there (speaker, discussion, Big Book, open, closed, etc.) . Your local schedule should identify the different types. (I have been to 68 meetings in 72 days.) Speaker meetings might be best for shy newcomers.
Oh, and I don't consider myself a bum either. Not to toot any horns, but I have a BS degree from a Big Ten university, and an MBA from a smaller mid-major. I have worked in management/engineering jobs throughout my 25 year career, with large and small manufacturing and service companies. But I'm a regular Joe too, and I'll give that factory guy or girl a hug at the meeting, because he/she understands my addiction and has been there. It's hard to explain unless you go to meetings and allow the fellowship to help you in your sobriety. I strongly suggest you at least try a meeting or two.... you have nothing to lose.
Johnny
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Coastal Massachusetts
Posts: 1,637
[QUOTE=JohnnyOneDay;3620211]WWG (and to others with misconceptions about the AA clientele),
It's certainly your choice and I'm not trying to influence you, and I know that AA is not the only way, but just to clarify......
If your city/area is anything like mine, you'll run into all types of people at AA meetings, but they are NOT a bunch of BUMS! And no, people there are not looking to swarm over newcomers and put them on the spot and embarrass them. You don't have to say a word if you don't want to. If you are embarrassed or shy, I would suggest a Speaker meeting. In those meetings, they do not go around the room and talk. You can just go and watch/listen to a speaker share their journey. I'm a shy, introverted person too, but I feel right at home at AA.
Some of the people I've met at AA meetings are:
As I've stated before, there are all kinds of AA meetings out there (speaker, discussion, Big Book, open, closed, etc.) . Your local schedule should identify the different types. (I have been to 68 meetings in 72 days.) Speaker meetings might be best for shy newcomers.
Oh, and I don't consider myself a bum either. Not to toot any horns, but I have a BS degree from a Big Ten university, and an MBA from a smaller mid-major. I have worked in management/engineering jobs throughout my 25 year career, with large and small manufacturing and service companies. But I'm a regular Joe too, and I'll give that factory guy or girl a hug at the meeting, because he/she understands my addiction and has been there. It's hard to explain unless you go to meetings and allow the fellowship to help you in your sobriety. I strongly suggest you at least try a meeting or two.... you have nothing to lose.
Johnny[/QUOTE
Thanks Johnny, I want to go but I am scared. I live in a very wealthy area, and would likely see similar people. Sr may not be enough.
It's certainly your choice and I'm not trying to influence you, and I know that AA is not the only way, but just to clarify......
If your city/area is anything like mine, you'll run into all types of people at AA meetings, but they are NOT a bunch of BUMS! And no, people there are not looking to swarm over newcomers and put them on the spot and embarrass them. You don't have to say a word if you don't want to. If you are embarrassed or shy, I would suggest a Speaker meeting. In those meetings, they do not go around the room and talk. You can just go and watch/listen to a speaker share their journey. I'm a shy, introverted person too, but I feel right at home at AA.
Some of the people I've met at AA meetings are:
- Police chief of a neighboring town
- Executive VP of Marketing for a large Fortune 500 company
- Elected Republican local county politician
- The father of one of my daughter's high-school friends
- A referree who works lots of local youth and high-school sports (baseball ump, football, etc.). He's a personal friend of mine.
- Many many people with college degrees and white-collar jobs
As I've stated before, there are all kinds of AA meetings out there (speaker, discussion, Big Book, open, closed, etc.) . Your local schedule should identify the different types. (I have been to 68 meetings in 72 days.) Speaker meetings might be best for shy newcomers.
Oh, and I don't consider myself a bum either. Not to toot any horns, but I have a BS degree from a Big Ten university, and an MBA from a smaller mid-major. I have worked in management/engineering jobs throughout my 25 year career, with large and small manufacturing and service companies. But I'm a regular Joe too, and I'll give that factory guy or girl a hug at the meeting, because he/she understands my addiction and has been there. It's hard to explain unless you go to meetings and allow the fellowship to help you in your sobriety. I strongly suggest you at least try a meeting or two.... you have nothing to lose.
Johnny[/QUOTE
Thanks Johnny, I want to go but I am scared. I live in a very wealthy area, and would likely see similar people. Sr may not be enough.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: The Great State of Texas
Posts: 45
WWG. If you see similar people, they will also be alcoholics, and they will also be trying to make their lives better just like you.
Remember you can visit AA across town or take someone with you if you are nervous. I was nervous my first meeting but I got over it instantaneously. In my experience, people with attitudes don't tend to go to AA meetings.
If you are getting it done without AA, don't worry about it. If not, you owe yourself every chance to get to your goal. I don't mean to pressure you, but keep an open mind OK?
Oh and by the way, if you go to a meeting and miss the next one, they don't send out search parties.
Remember you can visit AA across town or take someone with you if you are nervous. I was nervous my first meeting but I got over it instantaneously. In my experience, people with attitudes don't tend to go to AA meetings.
If you are getting it done without AA, don't worry about it. If not, you owe yourself every chance to get to your goal. I don't mean to pressure you, but keep an open mind OK?
Oh and by the way, if you go to a meeting and miss the next one, they don't send out search parties.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 516
Originally Posted by mark120910
Oh and by the way, if you go to a meeting and miss the next one, they don't send out search parties.
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