Class Of September 2012 Part 3
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Canada
Posts: 184
Trying to catch up, I accidentally skipped a whole page, somehow! Sorry if my post was a bit out of order.
WWG: I too fear "feeling good" - I fear over-confidence will trip me up! But, as long as we're aware of it, we know to be extra careful.
SFMS: sounds like you've come back from a tough life - you ARE strong. You have proof of it. I know you're new in town, and small towns can be...insular. My town was, anyhow (everyone was related to everyone; I was born there, but my parents weren't, and I still felt like an outsider). I hope your town isn't that bad. Or maybe it was my perception. Have you met anybody yet? Any of the other moms? Children can be a good conversation-starter. Children make friends so easily; maybe we could learn from them!
Evan: I feel tired, too. Tired AND restless, which is a strange combination. Like a lot of us here, I think a lot of it is worry that I won't make it much longer, that I'll give in. Comforting to know a lot of people felt this way, and just kept going...and are still going.
WWG: I too fear "feeling good" - I fear over-confidence will trip me up! But, as long as we're aware of it, we know to be extra careful.
SFMS: sounds like you've come back from a tough life - you ARE strong. You have proof of it. I know you're new in town, and small towns can be...insular. My town was, anyhow (everyone was related to everyone; I was born there, but my parents weren't, and I still felt like an outsider). I hope your town isn't that bad. Or maybe it was my perception. Have you met anybody yet? Any of the other moms? Children can be a good conversation-starter. Children make friends so easily; maybe we could learn from them!
Evan: I feel tired, too. Tired AND restless, which is a strange combination. Like a lot of us here, I think a lot of it is worry that I won't make it much longer, that I'll give in. Comforting to know a lot of people felt this way, and just kept going...and are still going.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 458
New to the class of september
Hi All, I am on day 3 again. Been in AA for a long time in and out. I can't believe how mind crazy addictions make you. It kicks you butt. I quit for several months then thought I could control my drinking by only drinking on weekends. What was I thinking? It has become more work than its worth, thats for sure. I recently became tired of the don't drink during the week, then drink on the weekend. Its driving me crazy, honestly even cutting down, I feel like crap the next two days after the weekend, have the anxiety, no sleeping, bad dreams then count the days until the weekend. I don't want that anymore. I was a daily drinker of wine, was a high functioning alkie for at least 10 years possibly 20. Today day 3 has been hard one for me, as usual. I worked out, went to a meeting and talked to someone from AA. I still felt anxious.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 754
Eli - I get it. I went to the grocery store and had to walk past the wine. I started to feel sad instead of angry - like I missed my old friend. It sounds silly now, but it did NOT sound silly at the time. I was really remorseful!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 516
Benice, I know exactly what you mean! I work in a restaurant and while I haven't really been craving alcohol at work, I get so envious watching people just having a meal, sipping a glass of wine and it's not an issue for them.
At least I know I'll be grateful in the morning I didn't drink. Trying to focus on what I'm gaining rather than losing but it can be tough!
At least I know I'll be grateful in the morning I didn't drink. Trying to focus on what I'm gaining rather than losing but it can be tough!
lolMember
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 9
Thought I'd pop in and update. I'm not much of a social guy and rarely "share" anything personal. I've always been more of a lurker, a wallflower, someone who keeps quiet and doesn't really know how or feel the need to express myself. All that used to be remedied by the drinking. Now, I just feel like a mute.
Either way, day 8 and still haven't drank. September 6th was my first sober day and I'm really happy I've made it this far, yet at the same time extremely nervous. I FEAR drinking. I know I don't want to drink. I know I want to be sober. But I've been through this road before and no matter how awesome and motivated I've felt, one day down the line something would change or click and I'd find myself at the bar. This time I hope that day never comes.
Either way, day 8 and still haven't drank. September 6th was my first sober day and I'm really happy I've made it this far, yet at the same time extremely nervous. I FEAR drinking. I know I don't want to drink. I know I want to be sober. But I've been through this road before and no matter how awesome and motivated I've felt, one day down the line something would change or click and I'd find myself at the bar. This time I hope that day never comes.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,456
The key is to make sure you never follow through on those bad ideas ideatrack - have support, reach out, and make plans for what to do if you ever do find yourself in a vulnerable situation.
Even sitting in a bar it would not be too late to make the right decision
In the old days I'd say 'oh well x has happened...I have the opportunity to drink...may as well'
I can't afford to do that anymore...I have to make other decisions...sometimes that's uncomfortable, sometimes it's a lot of work...but it's worth it
D
Even sitting in a bar it would not be too late to make the right decision
In the old days I'd say 'oh well x has happened...I have the opportunity to drink...may as well'
I can't afford to do that anymore...I have to make other decisions...sometimes that's uncomfortable, sometimes it's a lot of work...but it's worth it
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 76
hope22: I totally feel for the pattern you're describing. I'd quit for months, feel like I had control, and decide to drink on weekends or only when I'm out with friends or whatever. It took so much energy and brain space to go back and forth. I felt like my whole life was either drinking or waiting to drink. Sick of it. And I never had control, not really. I'm glad you're here.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 259
Struggling after today...conditional love I have no place for and let me tell you all...the consequences are NOT worth it. Dont let this sh*t ruin your life like I have...seriously...fight that f**ker cause it ain't worth it
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Michigan
Posts: 289
Somebody threw grease on that slippery slope I was on yesterday...oh wait...maybe it was me. Nobody to blame but myself. I threw away a solid week of sobriety tonight...I was doing so good...I AM HATING ME RIGHT NOW!!
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