Class Of October 2011 pt 3
Bound and Determined
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 203
Wow! November 1 seems pretty nice for the OctoberSobers. A really interactive full two thread day with alot of good humored jokes cracked throughout. This is a good thing! What a great and supportive group of people. Seriously though, those who have spouses or significant others that are drinking around you my thoughts go out to you. I don't know that I'd get through it. What coping mechanisms do you use to stay the course? All of you are very courageous.
Alaskasunshine...how nice to have a bible study group of friends, where you can be open about your issues and be supported and encouraged by one another and not condemned which sadly sometimes happens in some church groups!
The meditation class was totally different than I thought and really great. It was called "Mindful Zen". I thought you would just sit quietly with your eyes closed the whole time and focus on breathing or something. I really liked the way this woman ran it. We started for like 15 minutes, sitting in this dim room in a circle and just whenever an idea hit someone they would bow their head and state what they were grateful for. It was a roomful of people I had never met, I thought I might feel kind of guarded speaking about private issues and everyone was so open and inviting I hopped right in with gratitude. Then we did get quiet for 20 minutes and focused on breathing and counting from one to ten and then starting over again internally...really made me realize how my mind wanders all over the place, I had a hard time with the repetition for 20 minutes as if I had a sudden onset of major ADD but it was the first time. The way it wound up totally took me off guard. We had a group discussion and people took turns talking about what was going on in their lives and how meditating could help. I was amazed at the personal and intimate issues the people were willing to discuss. I felt so comfortable I was going to speak but the time ran out. Great way to end the evening. I hope everyone has a great Wednesday!
Alaskasunshine...how nice to have a bible study group of friends, where you can be open about your issues and be supported and encouraged by one another and not condemned which sadly sometimes happens in some church groups!
The meditation class was totally different than I thought and really great. It was called "Mindful Zen". I thought you would just sit quietly with your eyes closed the whole time and focus on breathing or something. I really liked the way this woman ran it. We started for like 15 minutes, sitting in this dim room in a circle and just whenever an idea hit someone they would bow their head and state what they were grateful for. It was a roomful of people I had never met, I thought I might feel kind of guarded speaking about private issues and everyone was so open and inviting I hopped right in with gratitude. Then we did get quiet for 20 minutes and focused on breathing and counting from one to ten and then starting over again internally...really made me realize how my mind wanders all over the place, I had a hard time with the repetition for 20 minutes as if I had a sudden onset of major ADD but it was the first time. The way it wound up totally took me off guard. We had a group discussion and people took turns talking about what was going on in their lives and how meditating could help. I was amazed at the personal and intimate issues the people were willing to discuss. I felt so comfortable I was going to speak but the time ran out. Great way to end the evening. I hope everyone has a great Wednesday!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 601
Another one for the running - it produces endorphins which is apparently the body's natural morphine, and it is addictive. You can get the 'Runner's high' after about 30 minutes or so, lose weight, firm up your legs and bum (Butt?) get a permanent tan and it really calms you down - in studies, more effectively than benzos - it's not a bad deal!
You know, and I don't know if I should be proud of this or not, I did an Ironman triathlon on a bottle and a half of wine a day. I remember being in the lake at 6am with 1500 other people and the sun just coming up and I thought "Bet no-one here drinks as much as me". I was actually more concerned that I didn't have any booze back in my campervan than I was about completing the race...
You know, and I don't know if I should be proud of this or not, I did an Ironman triathlon on a bottle and a half of wine a day. I remember being in the lake at 6am with 1500 other people and the sun just coming up and I thought "Bet no-one here drinks as much as me". I was actually more concerned that I didn't have any booze back in my campervan than I was about completing the race...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 601
Gerbosko, thanks for remembering I'm on day 24 - you asked about books:
'Unwasted' Sacha somebody - OK but a bit of a teen diary
'Terry' George McGovern, well-written, but sad - no happy ending
'Sober for good' - yes, good - looks at 240 alkies who gave up and tell their stories
'Time is all we have' Barnaby Conrad - Good - I got this on Audibook
'Dry' Augusten Burroughs - Good - also Audiobook
'Under the influence' - Original classic - must read
'Beyond the Influence' - Classic sequel - must read
These should keep you going for a bit.
I'm about to start 'How to quit drinking without AA' - will report back
Anyone else any recommendations? What's the 'Big Book' like?
Go Sobertobers!
'Unwasted' Sacha somebody - OK but a bit of a teen diary
'Terry' George McGovern, well-written, but sad - no happy ending
'Sober for good' - yes, good - looks at 240 alkies who gave up and tell their stories
'Time is all we have' Barnaby Conrad - Good - I got this on Audibook
'Dry' Augusten Burroughs - Good - also Audiobook
'Under the influence' - Original classic - must read
'Beyond the Influence' - Classic sequel - must read
These should keep you going for a bit.
I'm about to start 'How to quit drinking without AA' - will report back
Anyone else any recommendations? What's the 'Big Book' like?
Go Sobertobers!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: London
Posts: 1,384
Morning all ! Since coming back from NYC I have had a very bad cold/cough strange , I felt fantastic out there 
Anyway day 17 for me and with this bug absolutely no cravings or even thinking about booze, off work under duvet in and out of sleep , very nice though Be back to my normal self very soon I hope ! Have a sober day all
General Please read Alan Carr , Easyway.
Anyway day 17 for me and with this bug absolutely no cravings or even thinking about booze, off work under duvet in and out of sleep , very nice though Be back to my normal self very soon I hope ! Have a sober day all General Please read Alan Carr , Easyway.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: London
Posts: 1,384
Plus Forgot to add to my above post ^^^^ Hard to think that in NYC last week I was walking around in just Jeans and Tshirt ! I walked from central park to south Ferry there and back, did it two times the weather was lovely, guess we where lucky
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: NY
Posts: 176
good morning, all. great to hear from so many folks this morning.
DarkDays...glad to hear from you. rest well and feel better.
General...how awesome that you did a triathlon. imagine how well you will do now that you are sober. i am reading the big book now. it really doesn't fully make sense without attending the meetings. that's just my way...the human contact and sharing really helps me. i can't do this on my own. my drinking has been in solitude for the most part, so it keeps me honest to come into the room and talk about it.
alaska...i love that you shared honestly in your bible study. that was a really big step. you need to get support in all areas of your life.
philb, zenjen, spain, boozefree, goal...good to hear from you.
Day 24 for me. i confess i am still in the thick of mental obsession about wine. not as constant as week 1 but every day the cravings rise up and i feel this grief and despair. i had fifteen years of daily drinking, slow and steady, gradually needing it more--and more of it--every day until alcohol took up full-time residence in my thoughts. in my case, i don't feel it's genetics or a particular sensitivity or "allergy" to alcohol...i am a self-made alcoholic, slowly and deliberately increasing my dependence with every sip i took. somewhere along the way i lost control and the alcohol was in charge of me. so i guess it's not surprising that it's still in charge of my thoughts after just a few weeks. i depend upon the support of others here, and in AA meetings...being inspired by and accountable to others is keeping me sober. i hope one day i come to the point where i am fully doing this for myself.
peace and strength to all.
DarkDays...glad to hear from you. rest well and feel better.
General...how awesome that you did a triathlon. imagine how well you will do now that you are sober. i am reading the big book now. it really doesn't fully make sense without attending the meetings. that's just my way...the human contact and sharing really helps me. i can't do this on my own. my drinking has been in solitude for the most part, so it keeps me honest to come into the room and talk about it.
alaska...i love that you shared honestly in your bible study. that was a really big step. you need to get support in all areas of your life.
philb, zenjen, spain, boozefree, goal...good to hear from you.
Day 24 for me. i confess i am still in the thick of mental obsession about wine. not as constant as week 1 but every day the cravings rise up and i feel this grief and despair. i had fifteen years of daily drinking, slow and steady, gradually needing it more--and more of it--every day until alcohol took up full-time residence in my thoughts. in my case, i don't feel it's genetics or a particular sensitivity or "allergy" to alcohol...i am a self-made alcoholic, slowly and deliberately increasing my dependence with every sip i took. somewhere along the way i lost control and the alcohol was in charge of me. so i guess it's not surprising that it's still in charge of my thoughts after just a few weeks. i depend upon the support of others here, and in AA meetings...being inspired by and accountable to others is keeping me sober. i hope one day i come to the point where i am fully doing this for myself.
peace and strength to all.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: springfield, va
Posts: 1,385
Good Morning All,
Little Sparrow - I really like the baby steps philosophy. That was the concept that Caroline Knapp adopted in "Drinking - a Love Story", that and flexing an emotional muscle in early sobriety. In terms of reading material, I did not find
"under the influence or beyond the influce" helpful. They have good descriptions of the stages of alcoholism, but in terms of getting help was very dated. The only discussion was the "the Minnesota Model" which is punitive in nature. (Developed in the 1940's). "How to quit drinking without AA" is an excellent book. "The alcoholism cure" developed by the founders of passages is an excellent book. "Sober for Good" is a must read with wonderful practical advice. "The courage to change" provides experiences of many famous people and is very inspiring. "The heart of addiction" by Lance Dodes has some useful information. "Staying Sober- Tips for working a Twelve Step Program of Recovery" by Meredith Gould is an excellent book because it actually provides some practical exercises to working the twelve steps. "Staying Clean and Sober - Complementary and Natural Strategies for Healing the Addicted Brain" by Merlene Miller and David Miller is a must read, it provides current and cutting edge information. The Big Book provides biographies of people that have quit drinking that is inspiring, but I will be honest - the twelve steps don't seem to provide any substance. The one step that has to do with listing all your charactar flaws can be damaging to those that already have shaky self-esteem (myself). There is nothing wrong with wanting to grow and change those attributes that are not helpful, but when all you are focusing on is your deficits - it's just not positive or conducive to recovery. I would also make a list of personal attributes (we all have them). On another note, I was watching the news this a.m. and they were mentioning that moderate drinking may increase the chance of breat cancer. However, they also mentioned that 1 drink per day decreased cardiovascular risks by 30%. I find the recommendation to drink daily, a dangerous supposition. Or maybe, it's just annoying in the midst of trying to stop drinking
Hope everyone has a wonderful sober Wednesday!
Little Sparrow - I really like the baby steps philosophy. That was the concept that Caroline Knapp adopted in "Drinking - a Love Story", that and flexing an emotional muscle in early sobriety. In terms of reading material, I did not find
"under the influence or beyond the influce" helpful. They have good descriptions of the stages of alcoholism, but in terms of getting help was very dated. The only discussion was the "the Minnesota Model" which is punitive in nature. (Developed in the 1940's). "How to quit drinking without AA" is an excellent book. "The alcoholism cure" developed by the founders of passages is an excellent book. "Sober for Good" is a must read with wonderful practical advice. "The courage to change" provides experiences of many famous people and is very inspiring. "The heart of addiction" by Lance Dodes has some useful information. "Staying Sober- Tips for working a Twelve Step Program of Recovery" by Meredith Gould is an excellent book because it actually provides some practical exercises to working the twelve steps. "Staying Clean and Sober - Complementary and Natural Strategies for Healing the Addicted Brain" by Merlene Miller and David Miller is a must read, it provides current and cutting edge information. The Big Book provides biographies of people that have quit drinking that is inspiring, but I will be honest - the twelve steps don't seem to provide any substance. The one step that has to do with listing all your charactar flaws can be damaging to those that already have shaky self-esteem (myself). There is nothing wrong with wanting to grow and change those attributes that are not helpful, but when all you are focusing on is your deficits - it's just not positive or conducive to recovery. I would also make a list of personal attributes (we all have them). On another note, I was watching the news this a.m. and they were mentioning that moderate drinking may increase the chance of breat cancer. However, they also mentioned that 1 drink per day decreased cardiovascular risks by 30%. I find the recommendation to drink daily, a dangerous supposition. Or maybe, it's just annoying in the midst of trying to stop drinking
Hope everyone has a wonderful sober Wednesday!
Bound and Determined
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 203
Good morning from Los Angeles on November 2.
General- I can get addicted? I'm there! (running) and you get to get healthy to boot. Way to go day 24! I brilliantly broke my ankle falling off a ladder (sober) a few years ago. I think I could handle it though now. A natural born Klutz who drinks too much is a dangerous thing :-)
Dark Days day 17 too congrats!
And Goodchheer day 24 too! This is like Christmas Eve! Lots to be excited about.
Tanja. Thanks for all the reading material--weirdly I'm having a hard time with focus on reading at length right now. Its a bit of a challenge. I read alot while drinking. Problem is I can't remember any of it :-)
Another insomniac night. I felt like I had finally drifted off to sleep when the alram went off about 45 minutes ago, and I thought this can't be.....so I DID stagger to the kitchen, but not for Alka Seltzer and a mouthful of aspirin but for a stiff cup of coffee which I have consumed and I seem to be capable of typing.
I'm so tired I forgot what day I'm on I think its 15..no 14...no 15 ha I dont know...this is bad, I was told if you don't know you dont care...nah thats not true at all, I'm merely semi-awake. I'll go double check in a second. Kind of a long day ahead at work, but, it will keep me busy. Yes, I used to put Kahlua in my coffee even at work. I think I'll take it black this morning.
Have a great day all!
General- I can get addicted? I'm there! (running) and you get to get healthy to boot. Way to go day 24! I brilliantly broke my ankle falling off a ladder (sober) a few years ago. I think I could handle it though now. A natural born Klutz who drinks too much is a dangerous thing :-)
Dark Days day 17 too congrats!
And Goodchheer day 24 too! This is like Christmas Eve! Lots to be excited about.
Tanja. Thanks for all the reading material--weirdly I'm having a hard time with focus on reading at length right now. Its a bit of a challenge. I read alot while drinking. Problem is I can't remember any of it :-)
Another insomniac night. I felt like I had finally drifted off to sleep when the alram went off about 45 minutes ago, and I thought this can't be.....so I DID stagger to the kitchen, but not for Alka Seltzer and a mouthful of aspirin but for a stiff cup of coffee which I have consumed and I seem to be capable of typing.
I'm so tired I forgot what day I'm on I think its 15..no 14...no 15 ha I dont know...this is bad, I was told if you don't know you dont care...nah thats not true at all, I'm merely semi-awake. I'll go double check in a second. Kind of a long day ahead at work, but, it will keep me busy. Yes, I used to put Kahlua in my coffee even at work. I think I'll take it black this morning.
Have a great day all!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 182
Hi Guys, proudly sober, I was so stressed out yesterday evening, so many stressful things happening at work and at home, that I got into my car to get gas and I had to literally talk myself out of buying wine, or even a beer or two at the gas station.
Also as my cravings were really kicking in, voices in my head said "just go home and make some tea, go home and make some tea" and it was like a group of voices, maybe it was you all. I don't know!
I did go home and made tea and I made dinner for my son and then I hit an 8pm AA meeting. I did not share and I am sure I looked morose sitting there but, phew it was such a close call.
At the meeting, old timer next to me turned to me at one point (he has 30 years sober) and he said "so, do you like being sober?" out of nowhere. I think he felt like he needed to talk to me. I smiled and said, "yes, I do like being sober." My smile felt weird like it was cracking my stone face. I realized that I had not smiled maybe once all day!!
Anyway, thank God for SR and you all and AA meetings because last night if I didn't have that 8pm meeting to shoot for, I am not sure I would have made it.
And finally, thanks to everyone for responding to everyone else. I feel a little selfish sometimes and I keep meaning to address individual posts. Every single one of you helps me and I love reading your posts!!!
Also as my cravings were really kicking in, voices in my head said "just go home and make some tea, go home and make some tea" and it was like a group of voices, maybe it was you all. I don't know!
I did go home and made tea and I made dinner for my son and then I hit an 8pm AA meeting. I did not share and I am sure I looked morose sitting there but, phew it was such a close call.
At the meeting, old timer next to me turned to me at one point (he has 30 years sober) and he said "so, do you like being sober?" out of nowhere. I think he felt like he needed to talk to me. I smiled and said, "yes, I do like being sober." My smile felt weird like it was cracking my stone face. I realized that I had not smiled maybe once all day!!
Anyway, thank God for SR and you all and AA meetings because last night if I didn't have that 8pm meeting to shoot for, I am not sure I would have made it.
And finally, thanks to everyone for responding to everyone else. I feel a little selfish sometimes and I keep meaning to address individual posts. Every single one of you helps me and I love reading your posts!!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 117
Personally I don't care if my husband stops drinking. I don't expect it of him at all. It's not his problem that I'm unable to drink moderately. I took my kids out to a restaurant last night for dinner (long story) and noticed that almost every adult had a glass of wine or a beer. That also didn't bother me. What bothers me is when *I* want a glass of wine.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 617
Philb - Good Morning! Hope the coffee is good Hope you have a good day at work and it isn't too long. And, hopefully you'll have a better drive home tomorrow. Whew! Yesterday sounded bad. Interesting to hear about your meditation class - sounds neat. Let us know how it continues...are you going to attend again?
Hang in there - I was so, so sleepy for a while and it is finally starting to lift. Still love my coffee though Have a good day!
Hope you have a good day at work and it isn't too long. And, hopefully you'll have a better drive home tomorrow. Whew! Yesterday sounded bad. Interesting to hear about your meditation class - sounds neat. Let us know how it continues...are you going to attend again?Hang in there - I was so, so sleepy for a while and it is finally starting to lift. Still love my coffee though
Have a good day!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 617
Honeypie - 
Good job last night! You should feel proud this morning. Sure hope today doesn't test you as hard. Make sure to stop by later if you're struggling!
Are you planning on another AA meeting tonight? Sounds like they are really helping you. And - wow - amazing having the old timer talk to you.... Angels are everywhere. Enjoy your day!
Good job last night! You should feel proud this morning. Sure hope today doesn't test you as hard. Make sure to stop by later if you're struggling!Are you planning on another AA meeting tonight? Sounds like they are really helping you. And - wow - amazing having the old timer talk to you.... Angels are everywhere. Enjoy your day!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 617
Originally Posted by Cardio 
Personally I don't care if my husband stops drinking. I don't expect it of him at all. It's not his problem that I'm unable to drink moderately. I took my kids out to a restaurant last night for dinner (long story) and noticed that almost every adult had a glass of wine or a beer. That also didn't bother me. What bothers me is when *I* want a glass of wine.
Have a great day!
Drink tea
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 21
Originally Posted by General
Another one for the running... I remember being in the lake at 6am with 1500 other people and the sun just coming up and I thought "Bet no-one here drinks as much as me". I was actually more concerned that I didn't have any booze back in my campervan than I was about completing the race...
I run with the Hash House Harriers (google if you don't know) I've done so for years - but almost always with a substantial amount of gin inside me - I felt awful, I sweated non-stop, I was overweight and I was thoroughly miserable.
That's all changed now! My goal is to get fit - and stay sober!
The Hash House Harriers are often referred to as "a drinking club with a running problem" we always start and finish at a pub, so it's going to be quite a challenge, but I am determined to make it work this time.
Day 12.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Vancouver BC Canada
Posts: 384
Hey all , glad to see a lot of folks staying with the group. I haven't posted lately but day 26 and another good morning waking up sober and enjoying that I am not feeling like crap.
Haven't really had much desire or craving for a drink but I know how fast that can change so sticking to basics and taking care of things like stress levels , getting sleep even if its broken up over the night , eating properly, meetings and the like.
The freedom from that day starter eye opener, the day long maintenance drinking, the whole logistics of where to buy , where to hide and really knowing pretty soon into the binge that it would all have to end and face the ugly withdrawal make me wonder why I ever have surrendered that freedom so easily but as they say its is cunning and baffling stuff.
Halloween hasn't been a big party night for many years as in going to an actual gathering of people...now being at home and slogging back the poison has been a fact but not for the last three years.Guess I like to make sure the kids have fun and I am there to actually see it and remember it.
I know I am now entering a dangerous time from my journals over the years and seems like there is some 30 day clock for bad periods around 30, 60 , 90 or 120 days. A lot of relapses have happened almost to the day on any of these. I wonder if anyone else has noticed some kind of regular pattern in their relapse history assuming they have relapsed.
So be staying closer to SR than I have the last few days and do some extra care on things that have tripped me in the past and use the phone if things get toward stinkin thinkin. I'd like to maintain this freedom so I will use any and all means (er within the law of course) to keep it.
Have a great day!
Haven't really had much desire or craving for a drink but I know how fast that can change so sticking to basics and taking care of things like stress levels , getting sleep even if its broken up over the night , eating properly, meetings and the like.
The freedom from that day starter eye opener, the day long maintenance drinking, the whole logistics of where to buy , where to hide and really knowing pretty soon into the binge that it would all have to end and face the ugly withdrawal make me wonder why I ever have surrendered that freedom so easily but as they say its is cunning and baffling stuff.
Halloween hasn't been a big party night for many years as in going to an actual gathering of people...now being at home and slogging back the poison has been a fact but not for the last three years.Guess I like to make sure the kids have fun and I am there to actually see it and remember it.
I know I am now entering a dangerous time from my journals over the years and seems like there is some 30 day clock for bad periods around 30, 60 , 90 or 120 days. A lot of relapses have happened almost to the day on any of these. I wonder if anyone else has noticed some kind of regular pattern in their relapse history assuming they have relapsed.
So be staying closer to SR than I have the last few days and do some extra care on things that have tripped me in the past and use the phone if things get toward stinkin thinkin. I'd like to maintain this freedom so I will use any and all means (er within the law of course) to keep it.
Have a great day!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: NY
Posts: 176
Afloat...Welcome! Congratulations on day 12. This forum offers so much great support.
YVR...thanks for posting. So glad to hear from you. Congratulations on day 26. Glad you are being careful. Sounds like the desire to binge comes without warning.
peace and strength to all.
YVR...thanks for posting. So glad to hear from you. Congratulations on day 26. Glad you are being careful. Sounds like the desire to binge comes without warning.
peace and strength to all.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: NY
Posts: 176
tanja...just want to let you know that i found your analysis of different readings inspiring. i have not read as extensively as some of us have. i am focusing on AA teachings, as the meetings and personal contact seem to help keep me on track. i see your thoughts below on character defects. i need to look at this more closely. there are things i have said and done while drunk that i do deeply regret. however, i don't think these are because i am defective...i was drunk. what got me there is it's own long story.
i also agree, considering all that we here are going through, it is annoying if not harmful for the media and medical establishment to recommend a drink a day. there are those of us who find it impossible to moderate or manage one drink without needing another right away. i still have not chosen which theory i believe regarding the cause of alcoholism. i do know that there are those of us out there, for physiological, emotional, or whatever other issues, cannot manage a small amount of alcohol. i dearly wish i could...i miss it so!
peace and strength to all.
i also agree, considering all that we here are going through, it is annoying if not harmful for the media and medical establishment to recommend a drink a day. there are those of us who find it impossible to moderate or manage one drink without needing another right away. i still have not chosen which theory i believe regarding the cause of alcoholism. i do know that there are those of us out there, for physiological, emotional, or whatever other issues, cannot manage a small amount of alcohol. i dearly wish i could...i miss it so!
peace and strength to all.
Originally Posted by tanja
Good Morning All,
Little Sparrow - I really like the baby steps philosophy. That was the concept that Caroline Knapp adopted in "Drinking - a Love Story", that and flexing an emotional muscle in early sobriety. In terms of reading material, I did not find
"under the influence or beyond the influce" helpful. They have good descriptions of the stages of alcoholism, but in terms of getting help was very dated. The only discussion was the "the Minnesota Model" which is punitive in nature. (Developed in the 1940's). "How to quit drinking without AA" is an excellent book. "The alcoholism cure" developed by the founders of passages is an excellent book. "Sober for Good" is a must read with wonderful practical advice. "The courage to change" provides experiences of many famous people and is very inspiring. "The heart of addiction" by Lance Dodes has some useful information. "Staying Sober- Tips for working a Twelve Step Program of Recovery" by Meredith Gould is an excellent book because it actually provides some practical exercises to working the twelve steps. "Staying Clean and Sober - Complementary and Natural Strategies for Healing the Addicted Brain" by Merlene Miller and David Miller is a must read, it provides current and cutting edge information. The Big Book provides biographies of people that have quit drinking that is inspiring, but I will be honest - the twelve steps don't seem to provide any substance. The one step that has to do with listing all your charactar flaws can be damaging to those that already have shaky self-esteem (myself). There is nothing wrong with wanting to grow and change those attributes that are not helpful, but when all you are focusing on is your deficits - it's just not positive or conducive to recovery. I would also make a list of personal attributes (we all have them). On another note, I was watching the news this a.m. and they were mentioning that moderate drinking may increase the chance of breat cancer. However, they also mentioned that 1 drink per day decreased cardiovascular risks by 30%. I find the recommendation to drink daily, a dangerous supposition. Or maybe, it's just annoying in the midst of trying to stop drinking
Hope everyone has a wonderful sober Wednesday!
Little Sparrow - I really like the baby steps philosophy. That was the concept that Caroline Knapp adopted in "Drinking - a Love Story", that and flexing an emotional muscle in early sobriety. In terms of reading material, I did not find
"under the influence or beyond the influce" helpful. They have good descriptions of the stages of alcoholism, but in terms of getting help was very dated. The only discussion was the "the Minnesota Model" which is punitive in nature. (Developed in the 1940's). "How to quit drinking without AA" is an excellent book. "The alcoholism cure" developed by the founders of passages is an excellent book. "Sober for Good" is a must read with wonderful practical advice. "The courage to change" provides experiences of many famous people and is very inspiring. "The heart of addiction" by Lance Dodes has some useful information. "Staying Sober- Tips for working a Twelve Step Program of Recovery" by Meredith Gould is an excellent book because it actually provides some practical exercises to working the twelve steps. "Staying Clean and Sober - Complementary and Natural Strategies for Healing the Addicted Brain" by Merlene Miller and David Miller is a must read, it provides current and cutting edge information. The Big Book provides biographies of people that have quit drinking that is inspiring, but I will be honest - the twelve steps don't seem to provide any substance. The one step that has to do with listing all your charactar flaws can be damaging to those that already have shaky self-esteem (myself). There is nothing wrong with wanting to grow and change those attributes that are not helpful, but when all you are focusing on is your deficits - it's just not positive or conducive to recovery. I would also make a list of personal attributes (we all have them). On another note, I was watching the news this a.m. and they were mentioning that moderate drinking may increase the chance of breat cancer. However, they also mentioned that 1 drink per day decreased cardiovascular risks by 30%. I find the recommendation to drink daily, a dangerous supposition. Or maybe, it's just annoying in the midst of trying to stop drinking
Hope everyone has a wonderful sober Wednesday!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 58
wow, I haven't posted in three days, and there is so much to catch up on! I hope everyone is doing well and staying sober. I have to have discretion here and say that I slipped. I have to be honest with myself. I had one drink a few days ago because I felt peer pressured, that sounds weak but it's the truth. I was hanging out with a family member's 'new significant' other and he used the whole "you can have just one right?", it's not like they know I'm trying to stay sober, I haven't been that open about it I guess. Anyways, so I had one drink. The next day I had one drink. Then the day after that, I just drank way too much. I didn't drink and drive or nurse my infant (these are the two things I vowed NEVER to do again) so I felt it was OK to get a little tipsy. BUT it got out of hand, and me and my husband kinda argued and I wasn't the mom I'm trying to be.
PLUS the next morning I woke up with a hangover. Which was just horrible. I'm not sure if you guys know, but I've never been sure if I wanted to stop drinking completely. But I now know that I never want to get drunk again. So if that means stopping all together, than so be it. Right now I'm on day 1. I hope you guys don't care that I'm staying in the October group. Although I can move, if it's a big deal.
Have a beautiful day.
PLUS the next morning I woke up with a hangover. Which was just horrible. I'm not sure if you guys know, but I've never been sure if I wanted to stop drinking completely. But I now know that I never want to get drunk again. So if that means stopping all together, than so be it. Right now I'm on day 1. I hope you guys don't care that I'm staying in the October group. Although I can move, if it's a big deal.
Have a beautiful day.
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