Cow’s Corona Corner – A Place for Alcoholics to Isolate Together
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Not ideal, Walk, but I am so glad your Mom is home and happy. Small miracles, yes? The thought of all those older folks dying alone and miserable is gutting.
Glad you are also in the right place, Cos.
I guess I am too.
I made a break for the Prescott cabin, and am enjoying watching the critters and birds. We've got blue jays, orieles, robins, woodpeckers, cardinals, etc., a very nice mix with different personalities. The jays are hilarious. I put a couple peanut halves on the porch railing and they will swoop over and eat them. If they show up and I don't have any out, they will walk out onto a branch directly across from where I sit on the porch and give me hell.
PS. When are they going to fix this site?!
Glad you are also in the right place, Cos.
I guess I am too.
I made a break for the Prescott cabin, and am enjoying watching the critters and birds. We've got blue jays, orieles, robins, woodpeckers, cardinals, etc., a very nice mix with different personalities. The jays are hilarious. I put a couple peanut halves on the porch railing and they will swoop over and eat them. If they show up and I don't have any out, they will walk out onto a branch directly across from where I sit on the porch and give me hell.
PS. When are they going to fix this site?!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,436
I still have plenty of milkweed along the fence row and you all are right, tons of Monarch butterflies do enjoy them. My neighbor keeps bees so I try have lots of blooming things, not only for my sense of beauty but for them to eat.
Need, I was out mowing that same area again today and thinking about how I could make my dog compound snake proof, and keep my snake neighbors safe as well. I do enjoy the connection with the wildlife I share this farm with, and I can feel a harmony when we let other live in peace. That's even true with insects for me, but spouse has terrible insect Karma, especially with wasps.
I have almost finished my semester and am looking forward to a Summer in Nature. Here on the farm I am working hard to put the things I let slip or never finished, and in some cases didn't even start due to drinking back in order and it feels almost like an amends to the land.
I haven't been the steward I wanted to be up to now except to protect the animals and trees from logging. But I let so many things go. Part of the reason, caregiving my alcoholic mother, was legitimate. But you all know the truth of the bottle. Start drinking and nothing gets done except more drinking and drama.
How is the seizure eating plan going Cow? Is it helping? The zero carb thing I'm doing keeps on giving. I have so much energy, no cravings for booze still, and I continue to shrink in a good way. Not to mention I can carry 50 pounds of horse feed on one shoulder, and another 40 pounds of kitty litter in my opposite hand. Mega strong without training or excess exercise. Just work and meat.
Need, I was out mowing that same area again today and thinking about how I could make my dog compound snake proof, and keep my snake neighbors safe as well. I do enjoy the connection with the wildlife I share this farm with, and I can feel a harmony when we let other live in peace. That's even true with insects for me, but spouse has terrible insect Karma, especially with wasps.
I have almost finished my semester and am looking forward to a Summer in Nature. Here on the farm I am working hard to put the things I let slip or never finished, and in some cases didn't even start due to drinking back in order and it feels almost like an amends to the land.
I haven't been the steward I wanted to be up to now except to protect the animals and trees from logging. But I let so many things go. Part of the reason, caregiving my alcoholic mother, was legitimate. But you all know the truth of the bottle. Start drinking and nothing gets done except more drinking and drama.
How is the seizure eating plan going Cow? Is it helping? The zero carb thing I'm doing keeps on giving. I have so much energy, no cravings for booze still, and I continue to shrink in a good way. Not to mention I can carry 50 pounds of horse feed on one shoulder, and another 40 pounds of kitty litter in my opposite hand. Mega strong without training or excess exercise. Just work and meat.
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Yes, booze is a big consumer of time. In the moment, that can be its finest quality. Of course, once you get sober and look back at 30 years of wasted life, it becomes its worst and most cruel quality.
This diet is killin' me, Hawk! Meat has never been my favorite food, so I am having a hard time getting down the necessary quantity. As a result, my body is often in a stressed out hunger mode. And I am still grieving food that I do like. And the loss of treats and snacks. Just sitting down to a piece of meat and that's it makes me sad.
Having said that, unquestionably, I feel better if I stick to the diet. Less symptoms, smoother energy, better mood. All the things I wanted! Totally worth it! But still oh so hard. I continue to tinker with it to try to find a way that works for me, because I do feel, it is probably my only answer if I want to be off meds, which I desperately do.
Maybe you have some tips for me.
This diet is killin' me, Hawk! Meat has never been my favorite food, so I am having a hard time getting down the necessary quantity. As a result, my body is often in a stressed out hunger mode. And I am still grieving food that I do like. And the loss of treats and snacks. Just sitting down to a piece of meat and that's it makes me sad.
Having said that, unquestionably, I feel better if I stick to the diet. Less symptoms, smoother energy, better mood. All the things I wanted! Totally worth it! But still oh so hard. I continue to tinker with it to try to find a way that works for me, because I do feel, it is probably my only answer if I want to be off meds, which I desperately do.
Maybe you have some tips for me.
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
I don't think in the current climate I can afford the pate and crab legs diet! : D I was eating a lot of scallops which I like bet even those became a chore to eat.
I do eat dairy, although I do suspect it is not ideal for me as it usually congests and bloats me. But at this point, I am not ready to give it up.
I do eat dairy, although I do suspect it is not ideal for me as it usually congests and bloats me. But at this point, I am not ready to give it up.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,436
Me either. Dairy is my weakness but if you are eating it, blue cheese or Alfredo sauce.
I make chaffles, cheese crisps, and variety of meat omelets
I make pate out of bacon, butter, and chicken livers so quite cheap.Crab legs only on sale
Also bulk cryopaks of meat very cost effective
I make chaffles, cheese crisps, and variety of meat omelets
I make pate out of bacon, butter, and chicken livers so quite cheap.Crab legs only on sale
Also bulk cryopaks of meat very cost effective
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,049
I'm just checking in to vent a bit. Feel like I can articulate bad feelings on this thread better than I can on other places where it seems like there's a certain burden to motivate. What does that say about you all? You/we've been through the wringer, I guess.
My environment is grim. They say and it's true that the really bad indicators -- new hospitalizations and deaths -- are down, but people still keep catching it and dying, and we won't open up the things that make NYC what it is for a long time -- the restaurants, bars, 30 Rock, the Empire State tower, the tiny boutiques. I go out of the cramped apartment (wow I wish I'd gotten just one comfy chair and a new couch before this hit) most days, but I think I sat down somewhere outside my uncomfortable chairs, sagging couch, or bed just twice in almost 8 weeks.
Walks are doable & I do them, but the closures stay closed, the masks keep masking, and the worry is back on everyone's shoulders just like the grey skies and the drizzling rain.
The worst is no end in sight. My place of work isn't even talking about letting in anyone -- my guess is they'd have to disinfect the buildings, and they can't afford to. All they talk about, in murmurs so far, is layoffs. Anyone on a year-to-year contract, even if they've been a colleague for years, is trying to stare down bad news. I feel guilty that my job is secure when I'm so transparently non-essential.
The best I can think of to do is to try to help those just setting out to form their lives -- those newly settled, renting their first apartments, having their first child, getting their first real jobs. Like my son, and so many of them. Embarking full of hope a year ago, and finding all that hope collapse completely over the course of 2 mere months.
What can I offer? Hey, I wasted most of my life, even though things came appallingly easy to my generation. Now I know life is precious and short -- so wow, I hope you manage.... does hope help?
Thanks for listening, no harm if you skipped.
My environment is grim. They say and it's true that the really bad indicators -- new hospitalizations and deaths -- are down, but people still keep catching it and dying, and we won't open up the things that make NYC what it is for a long time -- the restaurants, bars, 30 Rock, the Empire State tower, the tiny boutiques. I go out of the cramped apartment (wow I wish I'd gotten just one comfy chair and a new couch before this hit) most days, but I think I sat down somewhere outside my uncomfortable chairs, sagging couch, or bed just twice in almost 8 weeks.
Walks are doable & I do them, but the closures stay closed, the masks keep masking, and the worry is back on everyone's shoulders just like the grey skies and the drizzling rain.
The worst is no end in sight. My place of work isn't even talking about letting in anyone -- my guess is they'd have to disinfect the buildings, and they can't afford to. All they talk about, in murmurs so far, is layoffs. Anyone on a year-to-year contract, even if they've been a colleague for years, is trying to stare down bad news. I feel guilty that my job is secure when I'm so transparently non-essential.
The best I can think of to do is to try to help those just setting out to form their lives -- those newly settled, renting their first apartments, having their first child, getting their first real jobs. Like my son, and so many of them. Embarking full of hope a year ago, and finding all that hope collapse completely over the course of 2 mere months.
What can I offer? Hey, I wasted most of my life, even though things came appallingly easy to my generation. Now I know life is precious and short -- so wow, I hope you manage.... does hope help?
Thanks for listening, no harm if you skipped.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,049
Originally Posted by courage2 
the really bad indicators -- new hospitalizations and deaths -- are down
Oh yeah and how about the amazing new count of 1,100 previously unknown deaths in NYC nursing homes the other day? And how about this recently in: "The vast majority of New Yorkers still walking into hospitals with COVID-19 have been sheltering at home and avoiding mass transit. Very few were even traveling on foot or in their own cars on a daily basis."
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
and i ditched two posts due to rather bad formatting mangling already, and am now not going to edit the last one, though of course i used quotation marks instead of accented a’s and Euros....cause if i edit, it will get worse:-)
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 675
courage, I think offering your understanding (rather than pity or platitudes) is more than enough. Tbh I appreciate you saying things came easier for the earlier generation, because I always feel whiny and childish for even thinking it. But objectively, I don't think it matters whether things were easier or harder, things are just very different now than they were then, and that's ok. The main positive (or negative depending on how you look at it) I can see coming out of this is it will push us further into what's possible to achieve online.
I was browsing real estate ads and came across a group of investors in Cali looking to expand into the Vegas market, basically doing joint ventures with people who don't yet have the capital to do it alone. They said they usually only do business in person but this has forced them to move things online and they discovered it works just as well that way. I've been researching this (unsuccessfully or not) long enough to know what sounds legit and they seem to be so far. If anything it seems to good to be true with their ethics and ethos of helping and mentoring people rather than being mass production vultures but we'll see..
I'm also gonna attempt to learn how to code (someone posted something on fb about Harvard offering certain free online classes with the option of buying a certificate at the end). Figured it might help with my impractical dream of "making an app". So as much as Covid has ruined most of my plans, I can't deny I've actually been able to explore ideas I probably never would have otherwise. Whether or not anything comes of those ideas remains to be seen.
N2K, it wasn't something I set out to achieve or even believed was a real thing. And it took a full year of continuous miserable action to build up to it. One thing I know for certain is it probably wouldn't be happening (even with the same routine) if I were still drinking.
I was browsing real estate ads and came across a group of investors in Cali looking to expand into the Vegas market, basically doing joint ventures with people who don't yet have the capital to do it alone. They said they usually only do business in person but this has forced them to move things online and they discovered it works just as well that way. I've been researching this (unsuccessfully or not) long enough to know what sounds legit and they seem to be so far. If anything it seems to good to be true with their ethics and ethos of helping and mentoring people rather than being mass production vultures but we'll see..
I'm also gonna attempt to learn how to code (someone posted something on fb about Harvard offering certain free online classes with the option of buying a certificate at the end). Figured it might help with my impractical dream of "making an app". So as much as Covid has ruined most of my plans, I can't deny I've actually been able to explore ideas I probably never would have otherwise. Whether or not anything comes of those ideas remains to be seen.
N2K, it wasn't something I set out to achieve or even believed was a real thing. And it took a full year of continuous miserable action to build up to it. One thing I know for certain is it probably wouldn't be happening (even with the same routine) if I were still drinking.
Pastafarian
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 122
Originally Posted by courage2
those newly settled, renting their first apartments, having their first child, getting their first real jobs. Like my son, and so many of them. Embarking full of hope a year ago, and finding all that hope collapse completely over the course of 2 mere months.
What can I offer?
What can I offer?
I heard a wonderful phrase the other day. On a Zoom meeting someone was discussing a new adaptation their department of a state agency had come up with that is not just a good idea now, but will serve us well in the future. She said, "Never waste a catastrophe!"
Hedonic adaptation has a flip side. We can get through this.
BTW Cow, how is your anhedonia lately? You seem more animated (pun intended) but I know you often just have that as an outward face to humor the public.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,049
Need2know, I'm glad your mom is home. Some of the people I know who've had this say it's not been like the flu for them. The lung damage seems the hard thing to get past for them. I wonder if your mom had a problem with lack of oxygen. Not like knowing would do any good. 
I also went to a zoom happy hour, but there were only about 10 people, my colleagues and students, and I didn't stay long enough for the drinking to annoy me. Two of them have been sick, so I wanted to check in. Also the organizer had a good game -- everyone sent in baby/toddler pictures of themselves, and we played match the baby face.
<3 to all. Probably some of you are coming out of solitary. Yay!
I also went to a zoom happy hour, but there were only about 10 people, my colleagues and students, and I didn't stay long enough for the drinking to annoy me. Two of them have been sick, so I wanted to check in. Also the organizer had a good game -- everyone sent in baby/toddler pictures of themselves, and we played match the baby face.
<3 to all. Probably some of you are coming out of solitary. Yay!
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Hello Kittens, well I spent some time at the cabin with the critters and the trees, but am back in the blazing cage of the city. It seems the longer this goes on, the less I have to say. I'm not really even calling people to keep in touch anymore, cuz I got nothin'. And I don't really want to talk about the virus or the violence. I guess all my training as a reclusive alcoholic turned out to be good for something, cuz I am able to keep my own company for months on end without getting distressed or going mad.
Walk, to answer your question from 5/15, I have seen a bit of relief from my anhedonia, which I attribute to the new diet and to being pretty much off all seizure meds excepting for occasional use during acute symptoms. Hopefully I will continue to improve as I tweak the diet.
How are all y'all going?
PS. Really? A forum redesign but still NO spellcheck!!!
Walk, to answer your question from 5/15, I have seen a bit of relief from my anhedonia, which I attribute to the new diet and to being pretty much off all seizure meds excepting for occasional use during acute symptoms. Hopefully I will continue to improve as I tweak the diet.
How are all y'all going?
PS. Really? A forum redesign but still NO spellcheck!!!
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
I'm much more flexible than I was several months ago, and that's wonderful. It was very distressing to me a year ago when I couldn't even comfortably hook my left leg up over my right knee. I think I'm losing weight too - a combination of almost daily walks and a prohibition against food in my bedroom, I think. And perhaps because I now eat three meals day? Hmmm
There are plenty of birds and trees in this neighborhood. It makes porch-sitting very enticing, so I'm doing a lot of that.
I could live in this sober home indefinitely if the roommates continue to be like those that are in the house now. A new woman is arriving tomorrow. Fingers crossed she'll be a good one.
Life is small and I'm ok with that.
There are plenty of birds and trees in this neighborhood. It makes porch-sitting very enticing, so I'm doing a lot of that.
I could live in this sober home indefinitely if the roommates continue to be like those that are in the house now. A new woman is arriving tomorrow. Fingers crossed she'll be a good one.
Life is small and I'm ok with that.
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Glad you stopped in O! 
I follow your thread and root for you, of course, but don't really have anything to contribute given my current monastic state ...and the ever deepening realization that I know virutually nothing about anything. 
I follow your thread and root for you, of course, but don't really have anything to contribute given my current monastic state ...and the ever deepening realization that I know virutually nothing about anything. Pastafarian
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 122
Pretty quiet here. Understandable.
I made a conscious decision to go off my meds and drink for a weekend. Just out of boredom and like who's gonna notice or care or blame me. Its a pandemic.
It was ok the first couple days. Then it quickly went out of control and ended up lasting about a week and a half rather than a weekend. At the end I was pretty traumatized and frighted. I'm not going to try that again anytime soon.
I made a conscious decision to go off my meds and drink for a weekend. Just out of boredom and like who's gonna notice or care or blame me. Its a pandemic.
It was ok the first couple days. Then it quickly went out of control and ended up lasting about a week and a half rather than a weekend. At the end I was pretty traumatized and frighted. I'm not going to try that again anytime soon.
Woe is Moo.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,746
Goodness, who could have predicted that. 
Last time I gave myself a hall pass, I found I didn't like the taste of my beloved red wine very much. So, of course, I got quite a few different bottles just to make sure,
but in the end I had to admit, I don't even like it anymore. And it threw me out of the good rhythm I had going.
I am in a pretty comfortable routine. I am doing a lot of research on neurotransmitters, and other than that I keep a schedule of eating well, exercising, getting sun, sleep hygiene, reading, and watching some TV. I can't yet bring myself to do necessary housework, but there is still time. I could probably do 6 more months easy before I start to go quarantine crazy.
My brain is in a rather decent place thanks to my research. I am off all seizure meds (for now), do not get over-excitation in my brain (which makes me want to drink it down), am in a reasonably pleasant mood which sometimes borders on contentment, and am sleeping 4-5 hours a night. I'm still tweaking things, but I'll take it!
Hope to hear how some of you other chuckleheads are doing!
Last time I gave myself a hall pass, I found I didn't like the taste of my beloved red wine very much. So, of course, I got quite a few different bottles just to make sure,
but in the end I had to admit, I don't even like it anymore. And it threw me out of the good rhythm I had going.I am in a pretty comfortable routine. I am doing a lot of research on neurotransmitters, and other than that I keep a schedule of eating well, exercising, getting sun, sleep hygiene, reading, and watching some TV. I can't yet bring myself to do necessary housework, but there is still time. I could probably do 6 more months easy before I start to go quarantine crazy.
My brain is in a rather decent place thanks to my research. I am off all seizure meds (for now), do not get over-excitation in my brain (which makes me want to drink it down), am in a reasonably pleasant mood which sometimes borders on contentment, and am sleeping 4-5 hours a night. I'm still tweaking things, but I'll take it!
Hope to hear how some of you other chuckleheads are doing!
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