Today is Yet Another Day
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
very sorry to hear that, Obladi.
you've likely read many times on SR the quote from the BB about how at certain times the alcoholic has no defense against the first drink.
i certainly found that to be true for me, though i believed it shouldn't and couldn't be so.
is that kinda where you're at?
you've likely read many times on SR the quote from the BB about how at certain times the alcoholic has no defense against the first drink.
i certainly found that to be true for me, though i believed it shouldn't and couldn't be so.
is that kinda where you're at?
It's a hard place to be. Someone wiser will have something good to say. Warm thoughts from me.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,434
It's OK--we've all been there many times ourselves and we get it.
Don't get down on yourself at the moment, and start making some recovery plans.
12 hours to get stable and sober.
You can do it--are you eating, hydrated, and can you sleep?
Sometimes hot tea and a shower help me get rest, and I try to chug
a big glass of water also while the water is beating down on me.
Of course, dump any remaining booze in the house no matter what.
Getting some toast down is also a help, even if dry.
How bad are you feeling in terms of hangover / detox?
Don't get down on yourself at the moment, and start making some recovery plans.
12 hours to get stable and sober.
You can do it--are you eating, hydrated, and can you sleep?
Sometimes hot tea and a shower help me get rest, and I try to chug
a big glass of water also while the water is beating down on me.
Of course, dump any remaining booze in the house no matter what.
Getting some toast down is also a help, even if dry.
How bad are you feeling in terms of hangover / detox?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,434
Yeah, my insomnia was always really rough after drinking.
I hope you are asleep now--
So O, when you are ready, let's talk about what triggered you
and tightening up the plan.
I just got up for some water--it's about 1:15 in the early am here--
I will check in again later this morning.
Please try to get some sleep if you're still up and for heck's sake,
do dump any remaining booze and get a bit of rest if you can.
I hope you are asleep now--
So O, when you are ready, let's talk about what triggered you
and tightening up the plan.
I just got up for some water--it's about 1:15 in the early am here--
I will check in again later this morning.
Please try to get some sleep if you're still up and for heck's sake,
do dump any remaining booze and get a bit of rest if you can.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,434
Well, honestly, I don't know if I get any "official" definition of trigger either.
I interpret it as: the thing, or series of things, which cause me to choose to put aside my choice of not drinking for any reason.
This / These "things" can be abstract--such as negative or obsessive thoughts but, in honesty, for me these thoughts are pretty much alwaysset in motion, i.e. "triggered" by physical non-abstract objects and acts in the "real world" supposedly outside myself.
This is most commonly people--they say, do, or respond to me in a way
that gets my mind racing and poof--another new sobriety date.
Sometimes it is objects or places or music which send me to the past
or other memory I don't want to fully feel.
Thus, triggering is a causal chain of events and my chosen reaction(s).
So, what causal events happened before you started drinking?
I interpret it as: the thing, or series of things, which cause me to choose to put aside my choice of not drinking for any reason.
This / These "things" can be abstract--such as negative or obsessive thoughts but, in honesty, for me these thoughts are pretty much alwaysset in motion, i.e. "triggered" by physical non-abstract objects and acts in the "real world" supposedly outside myself.
This is most commonly people--they say, do, or respond to me in a way
that gets my mind racing and poof--another new sobriety date.
Sometimes it is objects or places or music which send me to the past
or other memory I don't want to fully feel.
Thus, triggering is a causal chain of events and my chosen reaction(s).
So, what causal events happened before you started drinking?
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
Obladi,
i don't get "triggers" either, in the sense of any kind of cause.
triggers trigger reactions in me, that's all.
no, those reactions of, oh, let's say anger, annoyance, feeling insufficient, or unjustly treated (that one, i think was the most frequent), resenting, underappreciated, or whatever...they're feelings. they're in me.
i didn't know what to do with them, emotionally. drinking always got me away from just being with them.
anyway, no, triggers don't cause relapse.
what are your thoughts on powerlessness over alcohol?
and what is your experience with powerlessness over alcohol?
this is a good time to sit with that, before the freshness disappears.
there is no moving narrative which gets to "oh of course!! of course she had to drink then because of a, g, b, k, w and c.
i don't get "triggers" either, in the sense of any kind of cause.
triggers trigger reactions in me, that's all.
no, those reactions of, oh, let's say anger, annoyance, feeling insufficient, or unjustly treated (that one, i think was the most frequent), resenting, underappreciated, or whatever...they're feelings. they're in me.
i didn't know what to do with them, emotionally. drinking always got me away from just being with them.
anyway, no, triggers don't cause relapse.
what are your thoughts on powerlessness over alcohol?
and what is your experience with powerlessness over alcohol?
this is a good time to sit with that, before the freshness disappears.
there is no moving narrative which gets to "oh of course!! of course she had to drink then because of a, g, b, k, w and c.
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