Boleo

When I quit smoking, I simply white-knuckeled it ODAAT for a few weeks till the cravings went away (mostly). When I bragged to my sister about my accomplishment, she said; "You only smoked for ten years, you have no idea how hard it was for me because I smoked for 25 years."

That made me realize that I was no expert at quitting smoking.

Threshold

So true. I was not physically addicted to booze. I didn't have to go through that withdrawal. My situation was different from people who did.

Likewise I was not in a situation where all my friends, family drank or I was expected to drink due to my job. I didn't have that to contend with.

On the other hand, I was dealing with drug addiction too. So I had those withdrawals and issues. Also mental illness issues. My challenges were not the same as others. Different.

I also didn't have liver damage etc from drinking for decades, I drank a much shorter time.

MattyBoy

Some myths I've discovered by talking to others (non alcoholics) about alcoholics:

Alcoholics are always in denial
Alcoholics are weak willed
Alcoholics can stop drinking whenever, they drink selfishly for pleasure to the detriment of others
Alcoholics drink all day every day
Alcoholics all have some other mental health issue
Alcoholism is always a symptom for other problems

KateL

Good post!

dwtbd

I think third in the above list is truer than myth. It is actually the crux of the matter albeit with nuances of intent and drive, but basically more an apt description rather than myth. I would add " to the detriment of others and self"

Boleo

You're right it's not a Myth... It's a fallacy.

dwtbd

Which part? Do you believe there is no truth in the statements I made? Or are they just uncomfortable to consider and so most would rather dismiss or not recognize?

Carlotta

I agree with Boleo. I am an alcoholic, I could not quit whenever but quit when drinking was hurting me more than being sober. I also drank home alone at night while holding a job and doing volunteer work during the day and since I drank as a way to self medicate, I got no pleasure out of it.
What you described is basically the alcoholic who goes to bars to party with his buddies, blow the household s money on booze and make his wife's life miserable. Not all alcoholics are alike, there are many manifestation of alcoholism.

caboblanco

Actually the mental health community in United States believes this too..or claim they do..Its called "dual diagnosis" I wonder if big pharma corporations have anything to do with that

Dee74

I hate for our cynicism to blind us to the fact that many alcoholics really do have other mental issues....

D

caboblanco

yes they do but I don't know if every alcoholic needs to be on psychiatric medication...but I would agree that a lot do have underlying mental health issues

Boleo

OK. you have a point. This is more opinion than fact (on both sides). But let me put it another way... If I could quit "Whenever" I wanted to;

A) I would not call myself an alcoholic
B) I would not join a fellowship of alcoholics
C) I would never read or post at a "Recovery" web site.
D) I would not communicate with alcoholics in any way
E) I would never... ever give the slightest bit of advise to an alcoholic.


Now ask yourself this question; are you doing more good than harm giving advice to alcoholics of my type?

MattyBoy

That's why I included the word 'all' in the myth. I suppose what what I was trying to say is that it is a misconception that alcoholism is always a CONSEQUENCE of mental health issues rather than a CAUSE of them when sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes it can be the reverse. One major distinction when it comes to societal perception of drug addicts vs alcoholics is that drugs cause mental problems and alcoholism is a consequence or symptom of them. This is undoubtedly true in some circumstances but certainly not all. As much as you or others may refute this, I firmly maintain that I was a very happy, anxiety free person before alcohol came into my life, but when it did I was a black out drinker from the off because I couldn't stop at one drink. The effect this had over time on my GABA receptors, my dopamine levels etc etc caused anxiety and depression. I suppose that's what I was trying to get at when writing some of the myths about alcoholics and alcoholism.

dwtbd

I don't consider myself an alcoholic, I don't drink. I assume you are sober currently and I believe you have stated you have been abstinent for awhile, if this is the case , I wouldn't consider you to be an alcoholic either.
I have recently ended my addiction to alcohol, and that was after spending my adult life ( I'm 46 btw) drinking alcoholic ally. By that I mean nearly every time I drank I drank to get drunk. In my later drinking that meant drinking into blackouts , passing out most nights . At the very end I was showing the signs of alcohol dependence, drinking in the morning and during the day just to feel " ok" until I could drink through the night. I tried or wanted to quit for a long time, but in continued knowing it was harmful in many ways. I thought I was an alcoholic then, I thought I needed something beyond myself ,or to fix something with in myself in order to quit.
One day I read some material that showed me that I did have the power to want to and quit. Maybe I was brainwashed, but ever since I believed I could do it on my own, I have. That is when I stopped considering myself to be an alcoholic. I've decided not to be, are you going to tell me I never was? Or that I can't?
And I am just a guy on a forum sharing my experiences and opinions , advice that someone need follow? Hardly, I wouldn't presume to do that or represent myself that way, if you think what I post is bs call me on it, as you do

Dee74

I wasn't refuting your post - I wasn't actually even referring to it Matt

Some of us are alcoholics first with things like depression stemming from that...for others it's the other way around ...I started drinking at least in part to deal with my depression.

The absolute language that is sometimes used - always, never - rankles with me a little bit too, but maybe from a different perspective

D

MattyBoy

Agreed. I suppose the most important thing is, regardless of which came first - the alcoholism or the depression - that we recognise deeply that alcohol has an extremely detrimental impact on our emotional state and is not compatible with who we are

Boleo

You sound like the guy I thought I was in post #41

So what exactly are you sharing... Your Inexperience?

And what exactly are you trying to accomplish... Talking alcoholics into underestimating the seriousness of their illness?

Dee74

I find it's best to share our experience, not our opinions on other peoples experience, guys.

lets all play nice :

D

dwtbd

Dee gotcha

Boleo take what you need and leave the rest
Like with quoting and keeping context

MaxxPower

I'll check out some of those interviews....Tootoo is a tank.

Bryan Fogarty was predicted to be one of the greatest defenseman ever. Bold statement..i know, but he took it to another level.
Maybe if he didn't drink at all he wouldn't of ever made it to the NHL. Supposedly he was super shy...drank for confidence?
makes you think..
Alcoholism is such a tricky subject.
Whatever the case, another tragic story because of drinking.