ManInTheArena

Wow, that is spectacular!!

Charon

Well I blew it. I had planned to go to Bonaire in October having stipulated I need to be able to trust myself to stay on antabuse. Unfortunately I used pain as an excuse (not reason) to stop antabuse and drink while my wife was away last week. Trip is off. maybe next year.

Dee74

I’m sorry you drank Charon. Are you back on the right road now?

D

Charon

Yes and the regular (local but virtual) SMART meeting crew gave me some useful ideas. One of which worked on a fleeting thought Tuesday. And, even though I can't trust myself to take a trip this September I can build my trust in myself for a spring trip to somewherre other than Bonaire.

Dee74

Sounds good, man

D

Charon

Mrs is going away for a week, which would possibly lead to irrational thoughts. Fortunatly I have restarted antabuse and have been taking it long enough to make any drinking while she is gone impossible. So I am going to concentrate on how good I feel, the things I can accomplish, and the things I can do to enjoy - like riding my Honda Super Cub to somewhere I can snorkel.

ManInTheArena

Glad you are back on the right road, Charon. Happy for you that you have those SMART folks for support. I know what antabuse is, but I've never taken it. I've always been concerned that I'd still try to drink while on it - I have no idea how sick it makes you, and I'm kind of a baby when it comes to things like that

Enjoy your sober life!!!

Charon

I guarantee that if you were taking antabuse and had the smallest amount of alcohol you would never do that again. I tried it once with only an airline bottle (50 ml). I was never so sick in my life. Nausia like you couldn't imagine, vertigo, acvhes, migraine - total, absolute mysery, and heart pounding like it was going to explode and burst through my chest. And no way to get it to stop - only many, many hours of mysery, enduring it till it started to ebb. It seemed like days. I will never, ever combine the two again. If I plan to drink I have to stop antabuse for 12 days before I will chance it. That's why, as long as I am taking it I would never consider drinking. And I am taking it. So while my wife is away I am safe.

ManInTheArena

Wow. That is severe. I guess if it was anything less it wouldn’t really be effective.

What ever it takes. Good on you.

Zencat

I like your scooter. I have an electric motor kit on my mountain/street bicycle. Good local grocery getter with the 3 baskets on it.

Antiabuse turns into a nasty toxin combined with drinking I did consider it once however my psychiatrist talked me out of it. Never thought to ask for it again in spite of my ongoing heavy drug/alcohol at the time.

Being fresh in recovery myself I will do everything within my power to stop using. Maybe antiabuse would be an option for me? IDK
Perhaps use a broader approach to your recovery treatments? Include new recovery philosophies, plans, and, modalities?
AVRT and SR, plus an array of skills to practice aid me to become free of; alcohol, drama, depression, anxiety...etc.
IDK if I'm blessed or cursed because of all the stuff I have to go through to get sober. But dang, that's a lot of work I have to do.

Charon

Over so many years I tried so many things (yep AVERT & SR too) and so many "therapists". Fortunatly I found an actual therapist. One that doesn't just say "And how does that make you feel?" And "Can you sat a little more about that?" He calls me on my BS and has real advice. I also found SMART. Their tools have been a big help. However, after drinking daily for about 50 years, trying to stop is not the easiest thing I've ever done.I have made real progress and feel I've reached the final stretch. Now I just need to finish the race.

Charon

Spent time with two of my favorite VACI's yesterday. Rode my scooter for an hour on back roads up to a section of the Hudson River and snorkeled for about an hour. Then rode back home. I was tired when I got home, but not overly so. Last night I experienced pretty severe cramps in the back of both legs. I had to ice them to get the cramps to release. That's a very bad omen. Could be my days of solo scuba diving are over, or at least severely limited. I started working on my legs (gently) and hopefully I can build them up some. If not I can still dive from a boat in a group and snorkel from shore. I just have to be careful to do it in benign conditions and when I am well rested.

Dee74

I hope you can improve your legs a little Charon.

D

Charon

Going to use the same machine to work on my arms as well. More carefully though. Left shoulder hasn't been replaced yet so ...

Finally got off my butt and worked on a project I've been mulling over for years. I finished the first draft of another article for the American Orchid Society. Once my wife gets home and has time I'll have her proof read it and make suggestions. One more revision should do it and I hope to get it submitted by the end of the month.

Dee74

Good luck with the article as well Charon

D

Charon

My article was accepted (after some negotiation over the title). Whew. Glad thet's finialized. I was ready to submit to another journal if I had to but the AOS was my first choice. Now I can take a break from the mental stuff and play with my new charcoal micro-smoker/grill. I also need to prep the chicken I'm grilling on the regular gril for tonight's dinner. Tomorrow I'm planning to run up to Lake George and do some dives with my two 19 cf tanks. I want to take a look at a submerged buggy if it's still there. It's in shallow water so the 19's will be plenty of air. Going to treat this as a check out dive to determine if I can and want to keep diving. Or if it's time to give up and just snorkel.

Dee74

Congratulations on your article and I hope the trip to Lake George goes well

D

Charon

Today is the orchid club picnic. I'll be bringing 3 miniature orchids for the show table. Unfortunately one of my best flowers didn't quite last long enough to go today. Too bad - but, oh well. It's been on the show table at other meetings.

Dee74

Have a good time Charon

D

Charon

Had a goor time at the orchid club picnic. The club gives away one plant per family by lottery. The plants this year were wonderful offerings and my ticked was drawn well after the five or so I had picked out. But I still got one that caught my eye. After all the plants were given away there were some left over that were for sale. I ended up buying two more. That brings my collection up to max at 39 - more importantly that the exact number is that all three grow carts are now at capacity. I have one plant that I'm definitely going to sell. I need to find a few more to cull if I'm going to order from the SVO list in late winter.