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Irrational beliefs

Old 05-03-2009, 12:46 AM
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How about irrational fear?

*brr*

I was sitting at my desk drawing...and I thought I saw something move on my leg out of the corner of my eye. After a couple of seconds I looked. Aaaaahhhhhhhhhh! An ant an inch long! It might have been a Carpenter ant. I can't stand creepy crawlies! I knocked it onto the floor and then smashed the crap out of it. I don't know why I'm so afraid of these things. *brr*

It's not like the ant did anything to me...and I killed it. I wish I could be "one" with nature, but sadly, I'm not.


Now I feel like there's more things crawling on me. I'm tense and I don't want to go back to my room. No problems all winter long. I knew there was something I hated about spring. Talk about me being ridiculous!
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Old 05-03-2009, 09:01 AM
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Fear is born of natural instincts, instinct for survival, etc. I am not fond of spiders, snakes, etc., but that fear has not progressed to the irrational stage where it causes me grief and harms others.

Fear becomes an irrational belief when it does damage, IMO. I could be wrong, but all human beings seem to fear being alone at some level. That is natural, but look where it leads. Out of that fear are born these beliefs: I'm a loser, when they find out what a failure I am they will abandon me, money=power=people following me, I'll be miserable, I could go on ad infinitum. Those beliefs lead to me playing the bigshot or kissing people's ass so that they'll like me. What happens is that I drive them away and then I end up with I feared to begin with. It is like fear is a self-fulfilling prophesy.
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Old 05-03-2009, 09:09 AM
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Rational is just knowing the best way to fix whatever problem your dealing with. If I'm hot, and I don't want to be hot, then I'll turn on the AC.

Ok.. if thats the case.. then there are some pretty scary scenarios that can result out of rationality.."The US needs oil. So why not invade the Middle East?" In that case, it seems "rational" but totally immoral. It seems rational to combat the problm of illegal immigration by deporting people.. but again, totally immoral.

Anyway.. I'm not going to let some sticky define whats rational or not to me just because its author has a PhD. I know when I'm being irrational but feelings and morality arent in the realm of rationality.
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Old 05-03-2009, 09:15 AM
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yeah....it isn't letting the sticky define...it's reading something and learning what i can from the process...learning is interactive...i learn about myself even from reading or listening to crazy I listened to rush limba for a year and i learned alot even though i think he is a nutball (not to bring in politics..just an example some might relate to)

Out of that fear are born these beliefs: I'm a loser, when they find out what a failure I am they will abandon me, money=power=people following me, I'll be miserable, I could go on ad infinitum. Those beliefs lead to me playing the bigshot or kissing people's ass so that they'll like me. What happens is that I drive them away and then I end up with I feared to begin with. It is like fear is a self-fulfilling prophesy.
It has been suggested to me by people who care that i am doing something very similar to this....i guess what i have found to be very helpful when dealing with fear is to remind myself...i have made a decision to live my life based on the idea that safety is not the point of life.....now that doesn't mean i will walk into a burning building for no reason, but i might if there were a compelling reason to.

Life isn't safe and if i want safety i don't get to live by my definition of the word

Sorta got sidetracked there, but in a helpful way for me.
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Old 05-03-2009, 09:31 AM
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"It has been suggested to me by people who care that i am doing something very similar to this....i guess what i have found to be very helpful when dealing with fear is to remind myself...i have made a decision to live my life based on the idea that safety is not the point of life.....now that doesn't mean i will walk into a burning building for no reason, but i might if there were a compelling reason to."

I've found that fear doesn't just fly around in the sky and drop down on Jim. It is a decision that I make based on false beliefs. Once I'm aware of it, I can decide out of it. By that I mean walk through it. I've heard it said that courage isn't the absence of fear, but walking through the fear.

In some circles they say that fear and faith can't live in the same house. My answer to that is where else are they going to live? Recovery doesn't do away with the darkness, it just increases the light, and as long as I'm human I'll always experience fear to some degree. I just don't have to let it run my life.
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Old 05-03-2009, 09:39 AM
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Fear has been running my life and it is something I cannot control (I'm not talking about bugs now ). It is a personality characteristic I've had ever since I was wee little and when it is really bad it freezes me. It is also tied to my anxiety. I don't know what to do about it. Yeah, I'm getting help right now, but is it going to help me deal with it? Who knows. I'm wired this way for whatever reason. Maybe my acceptance will help me to deal? It remains to be seen.
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Old 05-03-2009, 09:40 AM
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absolutely....i've always believed that courage isn't not being afraid to fly, its when you have to fly and you go ahead and do it even thorugh you cry and shake the whole trip and make an a$$ of yourself

fear is like any other emotion as well..i can feed it and hang on to it...or let it slip through my life momentarily acknowledge it and get on..
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Old 05-03-2009, 11:05 AM
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Having a positive mindset is rational only in that it may bring you happiness in the long run.. but there are some things more important than whether you're happy or not. The world is tragic.. you may be able to rationalize it in some way to make yourself happier but then you're really not engaged in it either.

Last edited by Eroica; 05-03-2009 at 11:23 AM.
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Old 05-03-2009, 11:37 AM
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well..believe me i am not at all a believer in positive thinking...and i'm not chasing some dream of lalaland happiness here

I see the suffering in the world and do what i can about it...feeling the sadness and pain of that is just as much a part of the world as the other nicer feelings.

But seeing things in black and white.....as if there is only one aspect to life is not to me a rational logical or realistic way to view the world..both the positive thinking and negative thinking models are wrong

it's to see the world as it is and move through that world as skillfully and compasionatly as i can...that is what i would like to do.

Eroica...do you spend time daily looking at all the wonderful things around the world as you do on seeing the pain and sorrow? I'm not trying to be critical here..i think you are giving a lopsided veiw of your self....:ghug
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Old 05-03-2009, 11:41 AM
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Originally Posted by Phaleron View Post
Man is by nature a social animal; and an unsocial person who is unsocial naturally and not accidentally is either unsatisfactory or superhuman...Society is a natural phenomenon and is prior to the individual...And any one who is unable to live a common life or who is self-sufficient that he has no need to do so is no member of Society, which means that he is either a beast or a god.



I guess I'm a beast then...I don't believe in any gods.


I don't fit in well anywhere.
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Old 05-03-2009, 12:03 PM
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"Fear has been running my life and it is something I cannot control..."

bam, when I say deciding into fear and deciding out of fear, I am not saying that I can control fear because I can't control when I will in fear. What I can control is whether or not I am going to let fear run my life.
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Old 05-03-2009, 12:14 PM
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Originally Posted by jimhere View Post
"Fear has been running my life and it is something I cannot control..."

bam, when I say deciding into fear and deciding out of fear, I am not saying that I can control fear because I can't control when I will in fear. What I can control is whether or not I am going to let fear run my life.


When it comes to certain social situations, I am paralized by my fear. I'm just speaking on me, not for anyone else. I don't know how to move through my fears. I have zero confidence and zero self-esteem. Just putting my experience out there, that's all.
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Old 05-03-2009, 02:25 PM
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I get where you are coming from bam.

The only way I know how to move through my fears is to move through them. To take a risk. Which is difficult for someone who has been terrified of being a failure, of being rejected, of being alone, and of making a fool of himself for a good part of his life. Sometimes I just have to experience being uncomfortable.
Jim
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Old 05-03-2009, 03:42 PM
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Originally Posted by jimhere View Post
I get where you are coming from bam.

The only way I know how to move through my fears is to move through them. To take a risk. Which is difficult for someone who has been terrified of being a failure, of being rejected, of being alone, and of making a fool of himself for a good part of his life. Sometimes I just have to experience being uncomfortable.
Jim
That about sums it up for me. I'm hoping to find courage soon. I won't make it without it. This is eating me up.
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