saoutchik

In for another sober weekend.

Thanks Mags

Welcome Lixie!

FOMO. It's ironic that fear of missing out makes us go out, drink too much, talk nonsense, act foolishly and what that results in is that, in the long term we actually do miss out on the really important stuff like family life, career opportunities, sports, hobbies and other interests. The trouble is that it's fun to begin with.

London and surrounding needs someone to do a rain dance!

venuscat

I believe that people who are not comfortable being alone with themselves are missing out; I love my solitude.

I also love interacting with people, but I don't need to go to parties or bars to do that.
I am not missing out on anything.

Purplrks3647

Our family cat (brat cat) is named Moe….he lives at my mom’s and if there’s too much activity going on without him, she says he has FOMO….I couldn’t help but say “More like Moe-Foe!”

I’ll probably get in trouble on here for that one….

least

I don't miss anything about drinking at all. I was always depressed when I was drinking and never felt good. I'm so glad to be done with it and living my life clear-headed.

Sober53

Thanks Mags for the wonderful starter. The AV has been chattering all sorts of FOMO ideas lately

venuscat

The AV is very real, but it can't be given too much power. We can put that obstructive, irritating voice in its place. I used to shout at mine: THANKS FOR SHARING, MATE!
That always empowered me.

Reid82

In for this sober weekend.

AL48

You're so polite Venus. Im far ruder and use other words to say go away to mr AV. Its a male to me. Is yours female?.
Dose anyone else see it as another person trying to lead them up the wrong path. I just found it easier to see the AV as another person rather than my mind talking to itself.

venuscat

No, I don't see it as a person, Al. Because I refuse to give it that kind of power, and I don't ascribe gender to it either; it is a nasty, disruptive little bugger, and it can go back to whence it came from.

Cityboy

Purps, that gave me a chuckle.

Envisioning the AV as a person is interesting. It has always come naturally to me to completely disengage, or stonewall, when I've had enough of someone. I suppose it has been a similar experience with the AV.

Venus, I love your thoughts on solitude vs socializing. I've always been intimidated by social interaction, but yet afraid or terribly uncomfortable with being alone. Since the initial quit trauma wore off, pieces keep slowly falling into place, and neither solitude nor social interaction are as intimidating as before.

venuscat

I have never known anyone who has worked harder on their recovery than you, dear CB. I have a feeling that all of those pieces are going to fall into place for you. ❤️

AL48

I often wonder do i use it as a person because of my brother who gave up cigarettes many years ago after reading a book and used this idea. We used to speak about it at the time.
I do see your point Venus i didn't think of it that way. Im glad it (he) 🤭 dosen't pop up that often these days.

venuscat

These are just my thoughts, dear Al. I know we all have our own ways of defining the little monster. xx

PhoenixJ

At the end -it was FOMO on drinking. Alone. Such a miserable, lonely life. As goes the words, sobriety is a daily reprieve , on which we have to work on every day. Very grateful.

venuscat

I hear you, John. I remember those very desperate days. But we are past that now; isn't that wonderful? ❤️

Alysheba

^^^For all of us and our hard won sobriety, whether it be 12 hours or 12+years! The longer I am sober and hang in there with it, the more grateful I become. ODAAT.
We have a new housekeeper coming tomorrow who does not speak much English. I wish my Spanish was more up to date. I've let so much of it go. She (Mom) knows vacuuming really bothers my back, even more than laundry, so it will help us both out. She is going to be not able to use her pelvis area much still, Mom, She still is weak and unstable, so I walk with her to make sure she gets out there. She walks with me every day, except when it's too hot, too much pain, or something not good comes up, etc. and it helps her out. Seems to quite a lot. It might help just open that whole area up. She does her P.T. every morning by herself. Good for her. I'm proud of her for keeping it up.
Love to you all! Grateful for my friends here!

Evoo

Thanks . FOMO for drinking, hangover, anxiety and withdrawals? Heck no. No FOMO here - I'm exactly where I want to be.

Amen to that!

Agreed. I see the decades of romanticization for what it is - an AV lie. I've gone on weekend fishing trips, conventions, played bocce and games and have had more fun without having to play the "how much is too much" game. No thanks.

Haha I've said something to that effect before. Someone offered me a drink and I said, "No thanks, already had enough for a lifetime."

mns1

Count me in.

LoveHateWhine

Count me in!

Great OP, Mags! Thank you! Very timely for me.

Citrus

Count me in as well! I am closing in on a month, looking forward to another clearheaded weekend.