Holiday thread...
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Originally Posted by Obladi 
Hi, Gabe. I'm glad you're getting through this, glad too that today is a really good day! 
My two cents are to relish the beauty and try to 'lovingly detach' from distractions such as whether or when the mister decides to drink. I think you had plenty ideas of things to do with your husband that were not alcohol-centric. If you haven't already, maybe you can shore that up with ideas about things to do that aren't husband-centric. You know, to pull out of your hat just in case. What you deserve is to do whatever it takes in the moment to take care of yourself.
You're doing good.
O
My two cents are to relish the beauty and try to 'lovingly detach' from distractions such as whether or when the mister decides to drink. I think you had plenty ideas of things to do with your husband that were not alcohol-centric. If you haven't already, maybe you can shore that up with ideas about things to do that aren't husband-centric. You know, to pull out of your hat just in case. What you deserve is to do whatever it takes in the moment to take care of yourself.
You're doing good.
O
Navigating new waters. It's hard!!
01-14-2019
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,217
I went on a holiday once with husband and drinky family, and I literally went to a movie by myself to get a break. They are all caring and lovely but I couldn’t be around it anymore. I really learned becoming independent with no regrets as protecting my sobriety is number 1. It may come of as selfish but really is best for everyone, and everyone around me to not drink and become crazy. I do still negotiate drinks with my husband on vacations 2.5 years later, I know it’s my problem, but he knows I’d just up and leave and do my own thing if he’s hungover, etc. So no hard stuff in our hotel rooms, but he can usually picks up a six pack. If he was drinking super bad, I wouldn’t go…cause I’m not into being trapped with it. So this compromise had been working. Vacations being rare with Covid.
Keep posting, I’m rooting for you. Savor those hangover and regret free mornings. They are the best on vacations!
Keep posting, I’m rooting for you. Savor those hangover and regret free mornings. They are the best on vacations!
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
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Originally Posted by tornrealization
I went on a holiday once with husband and drinky family, and I literally went to a movie by myself to get a break. They are all caring and lovely but I couldn’t be around it anymore. I really learned becoming independent with no regrets as protecting my sobriety is number 1. It may come of as selfish but really is best for everyone, and everyone around me to not drink and become crazy. I do still negotiate drinks with my husband on vacations 2.5 years later, I know it’s my problem, but he knows I’d just up and leave and do my own thing if he’s hungover, etc. So no hard stuff in our hotel rooms, but he can usually picks up a six pack. If he was drinking super bad, I wouldn’t go…cause I’m not into being trapped with it. So this compromise had been working. Vacations being rare with Covid.
Keep posting, I’m rooting for you. Savor those hangover and regret free mornings. They are the best on vacations!
Keep posting, I’m rooting for you. Savor those hangover and regret free mornings. They are the best on vacations!
I think I'm making the right decisions for me and I'm confident I won't drink here. I just need to keep an eye on things and know when I need some time out.
Thank you very much for posting. I'm really glad you have figured out a way that works for you xx
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
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Great sleep, big walk and planning some good food...big chat with my mother in law too and they all are cheering me on.
Made me realise how easy it is to over complicate everything. I was just freaking out a bit but I feel better now. Xx
Made me realise how easy it is to over complicate everything. I was just freaking out a bit but I feel better now. Xx
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
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Originally Posted by Mizz
You are giving this your all, Gabe. It is understandable why there are the rules and the conversations..
Believe in yourself. We believe in you. Keep on going.
Believe in yourself. We believe in you. Keep on going.
I am not giving up now! I'm determined I'm walking away from this break rested and well.Stayed in last night. Everyone went to my in-laws for a few drinks. I really wasn't bothered at all. Best thing was seeing the hangovers today. I walked 9 miles while there were still in bed.
That's a win!
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Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 739
Originally Posted by Gabe1980
Great sleep, big walk and planning some good food...big chat with my mother in law too and they all are cheering me on.
Made me realise how easy it is to over complicate everything. I was just freaking out a bit but I feel better now. Xx
Made me realise how easy it is to over complicate everything. I was just freaking out a bit but I feel better now. Xx
It's what I am. I respect you to deal with it.
s
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Join Date: Aug 2017
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Okay....panic over! 5 mile walk in a thunderstorm and plenty of food. Feel much better.
I have booked the next two nights away, so I can have a bit of space. It'll mean the husband can have a bit of guilt free drinking time, then we'll do some stuff together next week.
There are always solutions....not always simple or easy ones but there are
I have booked the next two nights away, so I can have a bit of space. It'll mean the husband can have a bit of guilt free drinking time, then we'll do some stuff together next week.
There are always solutions....not always simple or easy ones but there are
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Originally Posted by Gabe1980
There are always solutions....not always simple or easy ones but there are
Look at that - you're doing this thing.
You're amazing.
O
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Brilliant move, Gabe! And great job of pulling back from the edge of the precipice.
You're making us all proud. Really, two weeks on holiday in early recovery would test anyone.
Keep making those good decisions and doing what's best for Gabe.
You're making us all proud. Really, two weeks on holiday in early recovery would test anyone.
Keep making those good decisions and doing what's best for Gabe.
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Thank you very much folks! I really appreciate the posts and encouragement.
Feeling exhausted today but much better in terms of recovery. It's stressful at times, but there are also some great gains to be had coming here. I'm going to have a bit of a rest today and eat some nice food, maybe a walk around the town I'm staying in and some coffee.
I did some sketching with oil pastels too. I've not done that for years. I feel I am getting parts of myself back again
Feeling exhausted today but much better in terms of recovery. It's stressful at times, but there are also some great gains to be had coming here. I'm going to have a bit of a rest today and eat some nice food, maybe a walk around the town I'm staying in and some coffee.
I did some sketching with oil pastels too. I've not done that for years. I feel I am getting parts of myself back again
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