Gabe1980

Just thought I would start this now! Last day of work then two weeks off. I am going to check in here every day to make sure that I keep my focus and commitment to staying sober.

I did something pretty brave - I messaged my mother in-law and told her I had been working really hard on staying sober and I needed to keep the place we are staying in alcohol free. No drinking, no alcohol in the fridge and no drunk people. If my SO wants to drink he can do so at their house and stay there overnight. He has agreed though, that this will be a mainly sober holiday.

My mother in-law was awesome. She said 'anything you need' and offered to give me reiki throughout the holiday to help me cope! Gotta love that!

I am feeling good about it. Healthy eating, rest, long walks and Orkney makes the best ice cream in the world....

Dee74

Sounds like a great start Gabe

D

Mizz

Wonderful, Gabe!
Your mother in law is a great support for you. I do hope this vacation is relaxing and everything that you need. The boundaries put into place will make it much easier. GOOD FOR YOU! Also, this thread you started is fabulous. I plan on being here with you during the vacation! Enjoy yourself. We are here for all the support that you need!

DriGuy

Great and unusual relationship with a mother-in-law that defies the stereotype. I had to google reiki, so I learned something new too.

biminiblue

Free Reiki on demand?! That's excellent! That will help. Great job laying down your boundaries. I would have a plan for what you'll do if that line gets crossed. People who drink are pretty notorious for forgetting past discussions and also really good at forcing their will(s) on others with no second thoughts.

We're here - keep in touch.

Gabe1980

Thank you Mizz. I am determined to make this a healthy and relaxing break. I really need it and I am not letting any negative stuff in to pull me down. It's an opportunity to enjoy doing things differently, so I plan to grab it with both hands. Thanks very much too for the continued support xx

Gabe1980

Free Reiki and Indian head massage!! Yes, I've been thinking about the holding boundaries and I think the first thing is to make sure I am okay and I am not in an environment that is going to undermine my sobriety. I also think that getting upset or angry isn't great and I need to make sure I talk about things that are bothering me, as they come up. Letting things build up is a recipe for resentment and feeling justified in then behaving badly. I need to be honest and I need to say NO this is not okay, if it's not.

Thanks Bim

Gabe1980

I'm glad you found out about Reiki - it really is awesome. I would recommend you give it a try DG x

Anna

Gabe, it's so good that you are prepared for this upcoming holiday and that you have support around you.

Gabe1980

Thanks Anna - it really is a new approach to time away. Instead of suffering through it I am excited and confident in asking for what I need. I think it will be fine

Lucinda2

Have a great holiday, Gabe! Chilling, walking and ice cream. Sounds perfect.

tornrealization

I am glad you set boundaries ahead of time so you are ready! Enjoy your holiday!

advbike

You go Gabe! You are so amazing! Have a wonderful holiday!

Gabe1980

Thanks Lucida! Sounds perfect to me too

Gabe1980

Gabe1980

Not sure about that Adv but I really am all in and trying my hardest this time! I'm really looking forward to it x

Thank you friend

Gabe1980

YAY!!! First day off...long drive today and stuck in traffic. Roadworks everywhere but just glad to be out the town.

The in laws bought me some non-alcoholic wine. Very thoughtful of them but I am just going to say thank you and not drink it....I don't even want to be around the fake booze stuff.

Will check in later and thank you all for the support ❤️

Mizz

The gift is very thoughtful, Gabe. People do mean well.

Im glad you are safe and have made it to your destination.

Gabe1980

Hi Mizz....yes, it was lovely of them! It's funny, I feel more uncomfortable say no to that than the actual wine. I think it's because I'm worried it makes me seem really militant....it's just the way it has to be just now.

Not there yet. Still on the road. Got a text about the wine!

Hope you are good today??

biminiblue

Just tell them you've decided that fake wine is not a good idea. They will be okay with it...after they say something...whatever they say don't take it to heart. Don't over-react. Your sobriety is yours to manage. Other people will not understand so I just don't even get into conversations about it. When the fake wine comes out, "No, thanks." No discussion needed other than, "That was nice of you, but that's not something I'm interested in drinking."

It's uncomfortable at first, but that's okay.