Still drinking and bad neuropathy
Member
Join Date: Sep 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 135
Originally Posted by sweetichick 
I pretended I had been sober and got caught out.
But seriously sweetichick, you sound in a pretty poor way. I know it's an obvious question, but have you tried working through the twelve steps with someone who's been there?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: St.Petersburg, FL.
Posts: 1,077
Hey, Sweeti. I'm sorry you're in such a bad way. I've been there, locked in my room with curtains drawn, not doing anything but drinking til I passed out, coming to and starting again. I wanted to die until I almost did--but my soul, that little spark deep within me wanted life. I went to inpatient rehab, developed a plan and leaned on SR a lot for support. AA has been very helpful to me in the past as well.
I had terrible neuropathy in my feet and hands, and as a musician this was particularly horrifying. When I stopped drinking it got better and had pretty much resolved in 6 months. Your physical and mental health will vastly improve when you quit the booze. I have problems with mental illness and don't feel my psychiatrist does anything for me either (I get the only seven minutes biz) so I'm trying to find a new one. Not easy, since I have a limited income but I will do my best with what I have. I never thought I could quit but now have 2 years, 9 months of sobriety. Life isn't perfect but it is good, and that's enough. You can do this!
I had terrible neuropathy in my feet and hands, and as a musician this was particularly horrifying. When I stopped drinking it got better and had pretty much resolved in 6 months. Your physical and mental health will vastly improve when you quit the booze. I have problems with mental illness and don't feel my psychiatrist does anything for me either (I get the only seven minutes biz) so I'm trying to find a new one. Not easy, since I have a limited income but I will do my best with what I have. I never thought I could quit but now have 2 years, 9 months of sobriety. Life isn't perfect but it is good, and that's enough. You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: East Midlands UK
Posts: 502
If you can do it please try the online meetings on the Intheroom website. I have been to many meetings there. I have never shared but just being there makes me feel part of a community and not so isolated. I have lived on my own for a long time and understand the lonely feelings.
After a few visits you realise that the same people are there and you begin to learn something about them and know them.
After a few visits you realise that the same people are there and you begin to learn something about them and know them.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,203
Hi Sweetichick! I am sorry to read of your troubles.
When I was drinking - half a bottle of whiskey a night on weekdays more than that at weekends - I could not contemplate just going to bed without alcohol. Even when I tried doing that sleep never came for hours, all I could feel was that yearning for scotch. All the deep breathing and mindfulness in the world was not going to defeat that.
I tried AA and it was not unhelpful, the steps all make sense but I am probably more of a one to one type of person. I also tried will power or white knuckling it and even though I think I have strongish willpower I failed miserably. At 54 I was running out of time and options. What I needed was something that could take out or at least significantly dial down those cravings and maybe that would be something that would help you too.
So I will tell you what I EVENTUALLY got round to doing that actually worked. It's all I can offer in the way of advice.
I forced myself out of bed at 0 dark thirty and either walked, jogged or a combination for an absolute minimum of an hour. After that I would go to work for the day, come home and do all the myriad things such as cooking, washing and cleaning that we need to do to keep ourselves human. After all that my mind and body was SO ready for bed that the cravings were maybe 15-20% of what they would normally be. As a bonus I lost masses of weight and got reasonably fit and healthier.
I don't know how it would sit along your health issues but if you can do it safely then it would be worth a try maybe.
When I was drinking - half a bottle of whiskey a night on weekdays more than that at weekends - I could not contemplate just going to bed without alcohol. Even when I tried doing that sleep never came for hours, all I could feel was that yearning for scotch. All the deep breathing and mindfulness in the world was not going to defeat that.
I tried AA and it was not unhelpful, the steps all make sense but I am probably more of a one to one type of person. I also tried will power or white knuckling it and even though I think I have strongish willpower I failed miserably. At 54 I was running out of time and options. What I needed was something that could take out or at least significantly dial down those cravings and maybe that would be something that would help you too.
So I will tell you what I EVENTUALLY got round to doing that actually worked. It's all I can offer in the way of advice.
I forced myself out of bed at 0 dark thirty and either walked, jogged or a combination for an absolute minimum of an hour. After that I would go to work for the day, come home and do all the myriad things such as cooking, washing and cleaning that we need to do to keep ourselves human. After all that my mind and body was SO ready for bed that the cravings were maybe 15-20% of what they would normally be. As a bonus I lost masses of weight and got reasonably fit and healthier.
I don't know how it would sit along your health issues but if you can do it safely then it would be worth a try maybe.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Originally Posted by sweetichick
They just don't look kindly on those still drinking. Prefer to spend their time with some other who has given up.
I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but there is a chance for you to rebuild, sweetichick. There is lots of good left out there in life for you to experience. Fight for it. It's worth it.
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